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8 Things to Do If You're Feeling Helpless

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restrictLeaderboardFlex1HeightAndOverflow: false, prebidConfigApi: false, useInfiniteRightRail: true, fiftyPercentAdRefresh: true, waitForNextFramePaint: false, revenueGroupAllowList: '', lmdSiteCode: 'hlt', pageTargeting, baseSlotTargeting, adLazyOffset, geo: { isInEurope: false, isInUsa: false }, initialSlots, auctionFloors: 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utils: { collapseAd: Wellness.GPT.collapseAd, buildGptUrl: Wellness.GPT.buildGptUrl }, displayOnScroll: false, displayOnConsent: true, adsToCollapse: ['leaderboard*','square*'], refreshConfig: { 'defaultConfig': { refresh: false, timedRefresh: 0, refreshLimit: "unlimited", userClickRefreshSelector: "", timeoutRefreshOnceOnly: false, fiftyPercentAdRefresh: true, sizeOverrides: null }, 'square-fixed': { refresh: false, timedRefresh: 30000, refreshLimit: "unlimited", userClickRefreshSelector: "", timeoutRefreshOnceOnly: false, fiftyPercentAdRefresh: true, sizeOverrides: null }, 'square-flex-2': { refresh: false, timedRefresh: 30000, refreshLimit: "unlimited", userClickRefreshSelector: "", timeoutRefreshOnceOnly: false, fiftyPercentAdRefresh: true, sizeOverrides: null }, 'square-flex-1': { refresh: false, timedRefresh: 30000, refreshLimit: "unlimited", userClickRefreshSelector: "", timeoutRefreshOnceOnly: false, fiftyPercentAdRefresh: true, sizeOverrides: null } } }; if (Mntl.AdMetrics) { 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You Feel Anxious </a> </li> <li class="breadcrumbs-list-item "> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/what-to-do-if-nothing-makes-you-happy-5085726" rel="nocaes" class="breadcrumbs-list-link" > When You Feel Unhappy </a> </li> <li class="breadcrumbs-list-item is-active"> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/things-to-do-if-you-feel-helpless-5093315" rel="nocaes" class="breadcrumbs-list-link" > When You Feel Helpless </a> </li> <li class="breadcrumbs-list-item "> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/9-things-to-do-if-you-feel-hopeless-5081877" rel="nocaes" class="breadcrumbs-list-link" > When You Feel Hopeless </a> </li> </ul> </div><!--end accordion__body--> </li><!--end accordion__item--> </ul><!--end accordion --></div></div></div></div></div></div> <h1 id="article-heading_1-0" class="comp article-heading"> 8 Things to Do If You&#39;re Feeling Helpless </h1> <div id="article-meta_1-0" class="comp article-meta mntl-block not-news" data-tracking-container="true"><div id="article-meta__wrapper_1-0" class="comp article-meta__wrapper mntl-block"><div id="wellness-bylines_1-0" class="comp wellness-bylines mntl-bylines"><div id="mntl-bylines__group_1-0" class="comp mntl-bylines__group mntl-block mntl-bylines__group--author "><div id="mntl-bylines__item_1-0" class="comp mntl-bylines__item mntl-attribution__item mntl-attribution__item--has-date"> <span class="mntl-attribution__item-descriptor">By</span> <div data-tooltip="<p>Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the &#34;Everything Psychology Book.&#34;</p>" tabindex="0" data-inline-tooltip="true"> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/kendra-cherry-2794702" rel="nocaes" data-trigger-link="true" class="mntl-attribution__item-name" tabindex="-1" >Kendra Cherry, MSEd</a> <div id="mntl-author-tooltip_1-0" class="comp mntl-author-tooltip mntl-tooltip mntl-group"> <div class="mntl-author-tooltip__top "> <div class="mntl-author-tooltip__image-wrapper"> <div class="img-placeholder" style="padding-bottom:134.8%;"> <img data-srcset="https://www.verywellmind.com/thmb/w7x__KIPSpoxWRRBurM9Kqk8MvQ=/40x0/filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/IMG_9791-89504ab694d54b66bbd72cb84ffb860e.jpg 40w, https://www.verywellmind.com/thmb/66vhMa_zlCFnP773y8eC1o3_HCY=/58x0/filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/IMG_9791-89504ab694d54b66bbd72cb84ffb860e.jpg 58w, https://www.verywellmind.com/thmb/5KCnnppbCs8VTdyXMfsDbo04AYU=/76x0/filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/IMG_9791-89504ab694d54b66bbd72cb84ffb860e.jpg 76w, https://www.verywellmind.com/thmb/UVkbjl0TZ6eJA9G--TvedkYdSfE=/94x0/filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/IMG_9791-89504ab694d54b66bbd72cb84ffb860e.jpg 94w, https://www.verywellmind.com/thmb/eL5wL-UPVwXxQ5uQCnpwFteUlQ8=/112x0/filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/IMG_9791-89504ab694d54b66bbd72cb84ffb860e.jpg 112w" data-sizes="80px" 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https://www.verywellmind.com/thmb/UVkbjl0TZ6eJA9G--TvedkYdSfE=/94x0/filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/IMG_9791-89504ab694d54b66bbd72cb84ffb860e.jpg 94w, https://www.verywellmind.com/thmb/eL5wL-UPVwXxQ5uQCnpwFteUlQ8=/112x0/filters:no_upscale():max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/IMG_9791-89504ab694d54b66bbd72cb84ffb860e.jpg 112w" alt="Kendra Cherry" width="200" height="200" class="img--noscript mntl-author-tooltip__image" /> </noscript> </div> </div> <div id="mntl-author-tooltip__name_1-0" class="comp mntl-author-tooltip__name mntl-attribution__item "> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/kendra-cherry-2794702" rel="nocaes" class="mntl-attribution__item-name" tabindex="0" >Kendra Cherry, MSEd</a> </div> <div class="mntl-author-tooltip__bio"> <p>Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the &#34;Everything Psychology Book.&#34;</p> </div> </div> <div class="mntl-author-tooltip__bottom"> <span class="mntl-author-tooltip__learn-more-text">Learn about our </span> <a href="/our-editorial-process-4778006" rel="nocaes" class="mntl-author-tooltip__learn-more-link" >editorial process</a> </div> </div></div> </div> <div class="mntl-attribution__item-date">Updated on October 31, 2023</div></div> <div id="mntl-bylines__group_2-0" class="comp mntl-bylines__group mntl-block mntl-bylines__group--medical_reviewer "><div id="mntl-bylines__item_2-0" class="comp mntl-bylines__item mntl-attribution__item "><svg class="icon reviewer-icon mntl-attribution__item-icon" > <use xmlns:xlink="http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xlink:href="#reviewer-icon" href="#reviewer-icon"></use> </svg> <span id="review-descriptor-override_2-0" class="comp review-descriptor-override "><span data-tooltip="Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. Medical Reviewers confirm the content is thorough and accurate, reflecting the latest evidence-based research. Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. <a class=&quot;review-descriptor-tooltip__learn-more&quot; href=&quot;/review-board-4796494&quot;>Learn more</a>." tabindex="0" data-inline-tooltip="true"> <span class="review-descriptor-override__descriptor mntl-attribution__item-name">Medically reviewed</span> <div id="review-type-tooltip_2-0" class="comp review-type-tooltip review-descriptor-tooltip mntl-tooltip mntl-group"><div id="tooltip_2-0" class="comp tooltip mntl-text-block">Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. Medical Reviewers confirm the content is thorough and accurate, reflecting the latest evidence-based research. Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. <a class="review-descriptor-tooltip__learn-more" href="/review-board-4796494">Learn more</a>.</div></div></span> by </span> <div data-tooltip="<p>Rachel Goldman, PhD FTOS, is a licensed psychologist, clinical assistant professor, speaker, wellness expert specializing in eating behaviors, stress management, and health behavior change.</p>" tabindex="0" data-inline-tooltip="true"> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/rachel-goldman-phd-ftos-4779228" rel="nocaes" data-trigger-link="true" class="mntl-attribution__item-name" tabindex="-1" >Rachel Goldman, PhD, FTOS</a> <div id="mntl-author-tooltip_2-0" class="comp mntl-author-tooltip mntl-tooltip mntl-group"> <div class="mntl-author-tooltip__top "> <div class="mntl-author-tooltip__image-wrapper"> <div class="img-placeholder" style="padding-bottom:100.0%;"> <img 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class="comp mntl-toc__heading-text mntl-text-block">Table of Contents</span> <div id="mntl-toc-toggle_1-0" class="comp mntl-toc-toggle mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc-toggle__btn_1-0" class="comp mntl-toc-toggle__btn mntl-text-block js-mntl-toc-toggle" data-click-tracked="true" data-desktop-bp="70em" data-collapsed-text="View All" data-expanded-text="View All">View All</div> <svg class="icon icon-circle-arrow icon-circle-arrow" > <use xmlns:xlink="http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xlink:href="#icon-circle-arrow" href="#icon-circle-arrow"></use> </svg></div> <svg class="icon icon-arrow " > <use xmlns:xlink="http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xlink:href="#icon-arrow" href="#icon-arrow"></use> </svg></div> <div id="mntl-toc__mobile-toggle_1-0" class="comp mntl-toc__mobile-toggle mntl-block js-sticky-toggle"><span id="mntl-toc__heading-text_2-0" class="comp mntl-toc__heading-text mntl-text-block">Table of Contents</span> <svg class="icon icon-arrow " > <use xmlns:xlink="http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xlink:href="#icon-arrow" href="#icon-arrow"></use> </svg></div> <ul id="mntl-toc__list_1-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list mntl-toc__list-heading expert-content"><li id="mntl-toc__list-item_1-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc__list-item-heading_1-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item-heading mntl-block"><a href="#toc-identify-the-source" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-toc__list-item-link_1-0" class="mntl-toc__list-item-link mntl-text-link mntl-toc__list-item-link js-mntl-toc-link" data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">Identify the Source</span></a></div></li> <li id="mntl-toc__list-item_2-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc__list-item-heading_2-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item-heading mntl-block"><a href="#toc-understand-why-you-might-resist-change" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-toc__list-item-link_2-0" class="mntl-toc__list-item-link mntl-text-link mntl-toc__list-item-link js-mntl-toc-link" data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">Understand Why You Might Resist Change</span></a></div></li> <li id="mntl-toc__list-item_3-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc__list-item-heading_3-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item-heading mntl-block"><a href="#toc-focus-on-what-you-can-control" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-toc__list-item-link_3-0" class="mntl-toc__list-item-link mntl-text-link mntl-toc__list-item-link js-mntl-toc-link" data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">Focus on What You Can Control</span></a></div></li> <li id="mntl-toc__list-item_4-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc__list-item-heading_4-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item-heading mntl-block"><a href="#toc-remember-your-thoughts-might-not-be-accurate" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-toc__list-item-link_4-0" class="mntl-toc__list-item-link mntl-text-link mntl-toc__list-item-link js-mntl-toc-link" data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">Remember Your Thoughts Might Not Be Accurate</span></a></div></li> <li id="mntl-toc__list-item_5-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc__list-item-heading_5-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item-heading mntl-block"><a href="#toc-challenge-your-helpless-feelings" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-toc__list-item-link_5-0" class="mntl-toc__list-item-link mntl-text-link mntl-toc__list-item-link js-mntl-toc-link" data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">Challenge Your Helpless Feelings</span></a></div></li> <li id="mntl-toc__list-item_6-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc__list-item-heading_6-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item-heading mntl-block"><a href="#toc-remember-your-strengths" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-toc__list-item-link_6-0" class="mntl-toc__list-item-link mntl-text-link mntl-toc__list-item-link js-mntl-toc-link" data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">Remember Your Strengths</span></a></div></li> <li id="mntl-toc__list-item_7-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc__list-item-heading_7-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item-heading mntl-block"><a href="#toc-practice-acceptance" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-toc__list-item-link_7-0" class="mntl-toc__list-item-link mntl-text-link mntl-toc__list-item-link js-mntl-toc-link" data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">Practice Acceptance</span></a></div></li> <li id="mntl-toc__list-item_8-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item mntl-block"><div id="mntl-toc__list-item-heading_8-0" class="comp mntl-toc__list-item-heading mntl-block"><a href="#toc-know-when-to-seek-help" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-toc__list-item-link_8-0" class="mntl-toc__list-item-link mntl-text-link mntl-toc__list-item-link js-mntl-toc-link" data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">Know When to Seek Help</span></a></div></li> <li id="sticky-toc__cta_1-0" class="comp sticky-toc__cta mntl-block"><div id="sticky-toc__cta-journey-title_1-0" class="comp sticky-toc__cta-journey-title mntl-text-block">Next in Small Ways to Feel Better When You're Depressed Guide</div> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/9-things-to-do-if-you-feel-hopeless-5081877" rel="nocaes" id="sticky-toc__cta-next-journey-link_1-0" class="sticky-toc__cta-next-journey-link mntl-text-link " data-tracking-container="true" ><span class="link__wrapper">What Can Help When You&#39;re Feeling Hopeless</span></a></li></ul></div></div></div></div> </div><div class="loc article-content"><div id="article__broad-video-jw_1-0" class="comp article__broad-video-jw mntl-jwplayer-broad mntl-block is-hidden" data-pixel-depth="100"><div id="mntl-jwplayer-broad__video_1-0" class="comp mntl-jwplayer-broad__video mntl-jwplayer mm-video lazyload" data-bgset data-sizes="auto"></div> <div id="mntl-jwplayer-broad__title_1-0" class="comp mntl-jwplayer-broad__title mntl-block"><div id="mntl-jwplayer-broad__title--text_1-0" class="comp mntl-jwplayer-broad__title--text mntl-text-block type--mouse"></div> <button id="mntl-jwplayer-broad__title-icon--close_1-0" class="comp mntl-jwplayer-broad__title-icon--close mntl-block type--shrew-bold" data-click-tracked="false"><span id="mntl-text-block_1-0" class="comp mntl-text-block">Close</span> <svg class="icon close-icon " > <use xmlns:xlink="http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xlink:href="#close-icon" href="#close-icon"></use> </svg></button></div></div> <div id="wellness-sc-page_1-0" class="comp wellness-sc-page mntl-sc-page mntl-block structured-content article-content expert-content right-rail__offset lock-journey" data-sc-sticky-offset="60" data-sc-ad-label-height="24" data-sc-ad-track-spacing="100" data-sc-min-track-height="250" data-sc-max-track-height="600" data-sc-breakpoint="50em" data-sc-load-immediate="4" data-sc-content-positions="[400, 1400, 1400, 1700, 2000, 2200, 2400, 2600, 2800]" data-bind-scroll-on-start="true"><p id="mntl-sc-block_1-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Feeling helpless is something that many people experience from time to time. It's a feeling that can strike following a period of stress or as a response to <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/common-symptoms-after-a-traumatic-event-2797496" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">trauma</a>. Sometimes, it can be a reaction to situational stress or a response to world events that seem overwhelming and unsolvable. In other cases, it can be a symptom of a mental illness such as <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-clinical-depression-1067309" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="2">depression</a>. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_2-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_3-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> "People often feel helpless because they are not taking action," explains psychotherapist <a href="https://www.yolandarenteria.com/" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="externalLink" data-ordinal="1" rel="nofollow">Yolanda Renteria, LPC</a>. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_4-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_5-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Strategies that can help overcome this feeling include: </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_6-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <ul id="mntl-sc-block_7-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> <li>Figuring out why you feel helpless</li><li>Identifying why you&#39;re resisting change</li><li>Focusing on what you can control</li><li>Recognizing faulty thoughts</li><li>Challenging helpless feelings</li><li>Remembering your strengths</li><li>Practicing acceptance</li><li>Seeking help if you need it</li> </ul> <div id="mntl-sc-block_8-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_9-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> &#34;Focusing on the things you can control can help you know what step you can take next or if there is even anything that you can do,&#34; Renteria suggests.<br/> </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_10-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-callout--key-takeaway_1-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-callout--key-takeaway wellness-sc-block-callout-base mntl-sc-block-callout mntl-block theme-key-takeaway theme-key-takeaway" data-tracking-id="mntl-sc-block-callout" data-tracking-container="true"><h3 id="mntl-sc-block-callout-heading_1-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block-callout-heading mntl-text-block">At a Glance</h3> <div id="mntl-sc-block-callout-body_1-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block-callout-body mntl-text-block expert-content"><p>The world can sometimes feel overwhelming, especially when dealing with personal challenges and troubling news of world events, including wars, political strife, social unrest, climate change, and other calamities you feel powerless to control. When you feel helpless, it can be hard to stay motivated to change your situation. Fortunately, there are some things that you can do to feel better able to tackle life&#39;s challenges and overcome feeling helpless.</p></div></div> <span class="heading-toc" id="toc-identify-the-source"></span><h2 id="mntl-sc-block_12-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block wellness-sc-block-heading mntl-sc-block-heading"> <span class="mntl-sc-block-heading__text"> Identify the Source </span> </h2> <p id="mntl-sc-block_13-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> If you feel like there is nothing you can do to change the situation, it can help to assess and evaluate the source of your feelings. Some questions you might ask: </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_14-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <ul id="mntl-sc-block_15-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> <li>Have you been coping with a great deal of stress lately?</li> <li>Have you recently experienced trauma or setback?</li> <li>Is something happening in the world that is outside of your control?</li> <li>Have you been struggling with other symptoms such as low mood, sadness, <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/9-things-to-do-if-you-feel-hopeless-5081877" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">hopelessness</a>, and loss of interest that might be connected?</li> </ul> <div id="mntl-sc-block_16-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_17-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Evaluating some of the factors that might be playing a part in your feelings of helplessness can help you decide what tactics might be the most helpful. For example, if daily stresses are making you feel helpless, finding ways to control <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/chronic-stress-3145104" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">chronic stress</a> may set you back into a more resilient mindset. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_18-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway_1-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway wellness-sc-block-callout-base mntl-sc-block-callout mntl-block theme-takeaway theme-takeaway" data-tracking-id="mntl-sc-block-callout" data-tracking-container="true"><div id="mntl-sc-block-callout-body_2-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block-callout-body mntl-text-block expert-content"><p>If the problem is something outside of your control, managing how you relate and respond to the problem may be more helpful.</p></div></div> <span class="heading-toc" id="toc-understand-why-you-might-resist-change"></span><h2 id="mntl-sc-block_20-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block wellness-sc-block-heading mntl-sc-block-heading"> <span class="mntl-sc-block-heading__text"> Understand Why You Might Resist Change </span> </h2> <p id="mntl-sc-block_21-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Helplessness is a tough emotion to experience. Sometimes, it can be beneficial to look at some of the reasons you might be resisting feeling empowered. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_22-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_23-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> That doesn&#39;t mean that you are choosing helplessness. It might mean, however, that you are resisting change because the alternative is frightening. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_24-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_25-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Not feeling helpless might mean that you are ready to make a significant change in your life. But, on the other hand, overcoming those negative feelings might compel you to take on challenges that can also be difficult, challenging, or even overwhelming.<br/> </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_26-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway_2-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway wellness-sc-block-callout-base mntl-sc-block-callout mntl-block theme-takeaway theme-takeaway" data-tracking-id="mntl-sc-block-callout" data-tracking-container="true"><div id="mntl-sc-block-callout-body_3-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block-callout-body mntl-text-block expert-content"><p>Remember that changing your <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-a-mindset-2795025" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">mindset</a> can be hard (and sometimes scary)! It often comes with its own unique set of challenges. But it also opens up a new world of opportunity and rewards that are worth pursuing.</p></div></div> <span class="heading-toc" id="toc-focus-on-what-you-can-control"></span><h2 id="mntl-sc-block_28-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block wellness-sc-block-heading mntl-sc-block-heading"> <span class="mntl-sc-block-heading__text"> Focus on What You Can Control </span> </h2> <p id="mntl-sc-block_29-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> When you spend too much time <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/repetitive-thoughts-emotional-processing-or-rumination-3144936" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">ruminating</a> over the things you cannot change, you are more likely to magnify feelings of helplessness. Focusing on those unchangeable things only leaves you feeling more defeated.&nbsp; </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_30-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_31-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> However, paying attention to the things you can control can help you feel more capable. It provides a greater sense of agency and can give you the motivation and energy to work toward making a change.  </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_32-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_33-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> &#34;People often feel overwhelmed with anxiety from the brain scanning multiple scenarios to fix a problem. A lot of these tend to be ideal scenarios that aren&#39;t realistic,&#34; Renteria says. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_34-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-featuredquote--none_1-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-featuredquote--none wellness-sc-block-featuredquote-base mntl-sc-block-featuredquote theme-none"> <div class="mntl-sc-block-featuredquote__quote-wrapper"> <div class="mntl-sc-block-featuredquote__quote"> <p>Focusing on the things we can control can give us a real guide to what we can do, even if it isn&#39;t what we would have wanted the most.</p> </div> <div class="mntl-sc-block-featuredquote__credit-wrapper"> <div class="mntl-sc-block-featuredquote__credit"> <span> — </span> <span>YOLANDA RENTERIA, LPC</span> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div id="mntl-sc-block_36-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_37-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> For example, you can&#39;t solve climate change, but you can&#39;t get in touch with your representatives to learn more about steps they are taking to support climate change initiatives. You can&#39;t control how other people treat you, but you can control and maintain your boundaries to protect your own mental well-being. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_38-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_39-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Other things that are within your power to control include: </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_40-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <ul id="mntl-sc-block_41-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> <li>Your thoughts</li><li>The way you talk to yourself</li><li>Your priorities</li><li>How you spend your time</li><li>How you take care of yourself</li><li>How you treat other people</li><li>The time you spend with other people</li><li>The coping mechanisms you use to manage stress</li><li>How much you pay attention to the world around you</li><li>How much time you spend on social media</li> </ul> <div id="mntl-sc-block_42-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-callout--center-bold_1-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-callout--center-bold wellness-sc-block-callout-base mntl-sc-block-callout mntl-block theme-center-bold theme-center-bold" data-tracking-id="mntl-sc-block-callout" data-tracking-container="true"><div id="mntl-sc-block-callout-body_4-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block-callout-body mntl-text-block expert-content"><p>Focusing on the things that you can control about a situation can help you feel less helpless and more empowered.</p></div></div> <span class="heading-toc" id="toc-remember-your-thoughts-might-not-be-accurate"></span><h2 id="mntl-sc-block_44-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block wellness-sc-block-heading mntl-sc-block-heading"> <span class="mntl-sc-block-heading__text"> Remember Your Thoughts Might Not Be Accurate </span> </h2> <p id="mntl-sc-block_45-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/ten-cognitive-distortions-identified-in-cbt-22412" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">Cognitive distortions</a> are your brain’s way of misinterpreting events, coming to faulty conclusions, and believing things that are just downright wrong.<span class="ql-inline-citation" data-cite="2"></span> So when you are dealing with a difficult emotion like helplessness, it is important to remember that your brain isn’t always telling you the truth. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_46-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_47-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> So the next time you find yourself going down the "nothing will ever change" or "there’s nothing I can do that will make a difference" <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-change-negative-thinking-3024843" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">rabbit hole of negative thoughts</a>, try to step back for a moment and take a more realistic view.&nbsp; </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_48-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_49-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> It isn’t always easy to change these kinds of thought patterns. Learning how to recognize them is the first step toward changing them!<span class="ql-inline-citation" data-cite="3"></span> </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_50-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <span class="heading-toc" id="toc-challenge-your-helpless-feelings"></span><h2 id="mntl-sc-block_51-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block wellness-sc-block-heading mntl-sc-block-heading"> <span class="mntl-sc-block-heading__text"> Challenge Your Helpless Feelings </span> </h2> <p id="mntl-sc-block_52-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Once you recognize those helpless thoughts and feelings, it is time to start actively challenging and replacing them with more accurate, empowering ones.<span class="ql-inline-citation" data-cite="4"></span>  </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_53-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_54-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> This might involve looking for evidence that points to the opposite. For example, if you feel helpless about trying to achieve a specific goal, think about times you have accomplished something you set your mind to.  </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_55-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_56-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Look for evidence that disputes your helpless feelings. Think about situations that demonstrate your personal agency. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_57-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway_3-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway wellness-sc-block-callout-base mntl-sc-block-callout mntl-block theme-takeaway theme-takeaway" data-tracking-id="mntl-sc-block-callout" data-tracking-container="true"><div id="mntl-sc-block-callout-body_5-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block-callout-body mntl-text-block expert-content"><p>By actively seeking information that makes you feel more empowered and capable, you’ll be better able to break out of a powerless mindset.</p></div></div> <span class="heading-toc" id="toc-remember-your-strengths"></span><h2 id="mntl-sc-block_59-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block wellness-sc-block-heading mntl-sc-block-heading"> <span class="mntl-sc-block-heading__text"> Remember Your Strengths </span> </h2> <p id="mntl-sc-block_60-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> If you feel helpless, it can be beneficial to recognize your own unique talents, strengths, and abilities. Emphasizing these capabilities is a great way to gain more empowerment and motivation to tackle challenges you might be facing in different areas of your life.  </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_61-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_62-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Consider making a list of the things you are good at, and then think about how you might use those skills to tackle a problem. Rather than ruminate on your weaknesses, focus your time on appreciating and honing your strengths. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_63-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <span class="heading-toc" id="toc-practice-acceptance"></span><h2 id="mntl-sc-block_64-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block wellness-sc-block-heading mntl-sc-block-heading"> <span class="mntl-sc-block-heading__text"> Practice Acceptance </span> </h2> <p id="mntl-sc-block_65-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> While it might seem counterproductive, acknowledging the things outside of your control may actually improve your ability to accept them. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_66-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_67-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> &#34;The role of the brain is to find solutions. If we let it, the brain can scan solutions for days, months, or even years, which only fuels anxiety, overwhelm, and shut down,&#34; Renteria explains. &#34;When we develop the habit of accepting there&#39;s nothing we can do, we help train the brain to stop ruminating idealized scenarios.&#34; </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_68-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_69-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Essentially, feeling like you have to control everything can actually make you feel more helpless. It can even make you feel hopeless when you find yourself overwhelmed by the reality of the situation. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_70-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway_4-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway wellness-sc-block-callout-base mntl-sc-block-callout mntl-block theme-takeaway theme-takeaway" data-tracking-id="mntl-sc-block-callout" data-tracking-container="true"><div id="mntl-sc-block-callout-body_6-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block-callout-body mntl-text-block expert-content"><p>Research suggests that when people mistakenly believe they can control the future, they actually end up feeling even more distressed.<span class="ql-inline-citation" data-cite="1"></span></p></div></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_72-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Focusing on the present, on the things you can control in the here-and-now, can be more effective. Working on controlling things in the present may help people feel less distressed and more satisfied with life. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_73-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-featuredquote--none_2-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-featuredquote--none wellness-sc-block-featuredquote-base mntl-sc-block-featuredquote theme-none"> <div class="mntl-sc-block-featuredquote__quote-wrapper"> <div class="mntl-sc-block-featuredquote__quote"> <p>When you accept things that are not in your hands, you align with the present reality instead of the ideal scenario of how things should be.</p> </div> <div class="mntl-sc-block-featuredquote__credit-wrapper"> <div class="mntl-sc-block-featuredquote__credit"> <span> — </span> <span>YOLANDA RENTERIA, LPC</span> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div id="mntl-sc-block_75-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_76-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/mindfulness-the-health-and-stress-relief-benefits-3145189" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">Mindfulness</a>, a process that involves becoming more aware of the present without lingering on the past or worrying about the future, may reduce feelings of helplessness.<span class="ql-inline-citation" data-cite="5"></span> </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_77-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <span class="heading-toc" id="toc-know-when-to-seek-help"></span><h2 id="mntl-sc-block_78-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block wellness-sc-block-heading mntl-sc-block-heading"> <span class="mntl-sc-block-heading__text"> Know When to Seek Help </span> </h2> <p id="mntl-sc-block_79-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Helplessness is a difficult emotion that can make it hard to tackle the obstacles that you face in your life. Fortunately, there are things that you can do to feel more capable and empowered.  </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_80-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_81-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> If your feelings of helplessness are causing distress, making it difficult to function, or are accompanied by other symptoms, talk to your doctor. Such symptoms may be a sign of a condition such as depression or another <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/mood-disorder-1067175" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">mood disorder</a>.<span class="ql-inline-citation" data-cite="6"></span> </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_82-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <p id="mntl-sc-block_83-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-html"> Your doctor may recommend treatment options such as <a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/best-online-therapy-4691206" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="1">psychotherapy</a>, medication, and lifestyle modifications to help you start feeling better and improve your well-being. </p> <div id="mntl-sc-block_84-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block mntl-sc-block-adslot mntl-block"></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway_5-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-callout--takeaway wellness-sc-block-callout-base mntl-sc-block-callout mntl-block theme-takeaway theme-takeaway" data-tracking-id="mntl-sc-block-callout" data-tracking-container="true"><div id="mntl-sc-block-callout-body_7-0" class="comp mntl-sc-block-callout-body mntl-text-block expert-content"><p>If you or a loved one are struggling with feelings of helplessness or depression, contact the&nbsp;<a href="https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="externalLink" data-ordinal="1" rel="noopener noreferrer">Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline</a>&nbsp;at <strong>1-800-662-4357</strong> for information on support and treatment facilities in your area.</p> <p>For more mental health resources, see our&nbsp;<a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/national-helpline-database-4799696" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="internalLink" data-ordinal="2" rel="noopener noreferrer">National Helpline Database</a>.</p></div></div> <div id="wellness-sc-block-featuredlink--readnext_1-0" class="comp wellness-sc-block-featuredlink--readnext wellness-sc-block-featuredlink-base mntl-sc-block-featuredlink mntl-block readnext-link readnext-link theme-readnext"><a href="https://www.verywellmind.com/9-things-to-do-if-you-feel-hopeless-5081877" rel="nocaes" id="mntl-sc-block-featuredlink__link_1-0" class="mntl-sc-block-featuredlink__link mntl-text-link " data-tracking-container="true" data-tracking-id="featured-link" ><span class="link__wrapper">What Can Help When You&#39;re Feeling Hopeless</span></a></div></div> <div id="post-article_1-0" class="comp post-article mntl-block"><div id="sources_1-0" class="comp sources mntl-block"><div id="mntl-article-sources_1-0" class="comp mntl-article-sources mntl-expandable-block" data-scroll-offset="70"><div class="loc toggle-content"><div id="mntl-article-sources__wrapper_1-0" class="comp mntl-article-sources__wrapper mntl-block" data-click-tracked="true" tabindex="0"><span id="mntl-article-sources__heading_1-0" class="comp mntl-article-sources__heading mntl-text-block">6 Sources</span> <svg class="icon show-icon " > <use xmlns:xlink="http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xlink:href="#show-icon" href="#show-icon"></use> </svg> <svg class="icon hide-icon " > <use xmlns:xlink="http://www.w3.org/1999/xlink" xlink:href="#hide-icon" href="#hide-icon"></use> </svg></div> </div><div class="loc expandable-content"><div id="source-guidelines_1-0" class="comp source-guidelines mntl-text-block">Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our <a href=/our-editorial-process-4778006>editorial process</a> to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.</div> <div id="mntl-article-sources__citation-sources_1-0" class="comp mntl-article-sources__citation-sources mntl-citation-sources mntl-sources" data-tracking-container="true"> <ol class="mntl-sources__content"> <li class="mntl-sources__source" id="citation-2"><p>Wang B, Zhao Y, Lu X, Qin B. <a href="https://doi.org/10.3389/fpubh.2022.1045777" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="externalLink" data-ordinal="1">Cognitive distortion based explainable depression detection and analysis technologies for the adolescent internet users on social media</a>. <em>Front Public Health</em>. 2023;10:1045777. doi:10.3389/fpubh.2022.1045777</p></li> <li class="mntl-sources__source" id="citation-3"><p>Harvard Health Publishing. <a href="https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/how-to-recognize-and-tame-your-cognitive-distortions-202205042738" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="externalLink" data-ordinal="1">How to recognize and tame your cognitive distortions</a>.</p></li> <li class="mntl-sources__source" id="citation-4"><p>Curtiss JE, Levine DS, Ander I, Baker AW. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.focus.20200045" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="externalLink" data-ordinal="1">Cognitive-behavioral treatments for anxiety and stress-related disorders</a>. <em>Focus (Am Psychiatr Publ)</em>. 2021;19(2):184-189. doi:10.1176/appi.focus.20200045</p></li> <li class="mntl-sources__source" id="citation-1"><p>Frazier P, Caston J. <a href="https://psycnet.apa.org/doi/10.1080/15325024.2014.949161" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="externalLink" data-ordinal="1">Event controllability moderates the relation between perceived control and adjustment to stressors</a>. <em>J Loss Trauma</em>. 2015;20(6):526-540. doi:10.1080/15325024.2014.949161</p></li> <li class="mntl-sources__source" id="citation-5"><p>Garland EL, Hanley AW, Baker AK, Howard MO. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1177/2470547017711912" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="externalLink" data-ordinal="1">Biobehavioral mechanisms of mindfulness as a treatment for chronic stress: An RDoC perspective</a>. <em>Chronic Stress (Thousand Oaks)</em>. 2017;1:2470547017711912. doi:10.1177/2470547017711912</p></li> <li class="mntl-sources__source" id="citation-6"><p>Ejdemyr I, Hedström F, Gruber M, Nordin S. <a href="https://doi.org/10.1111/sjop.12713" data-component="link" data-source="inlineLink" data-type="externalLink" data-ordinal="1">Somatic symptoms of helplessness and hopelessness</a>. <em>Scand J Psychol</em>. 2021;62(3):393-400. doi:10.1111/sjop.12713</p></li> </ol> </div> </div></div></div> <div id="author-bio_1-0" class="comp author-bio "> <div 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