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Honor has picked a theme for her year as Mount Anville head girl: ‘Vengeance’ – The Irish Times

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aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_sport"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/gaelic-games" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Gaelic Games</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/rugby" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Rugby</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/soccer" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Soccer</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/golf" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Golf</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/racing" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Racing</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/athletics" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Athletics</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/boxing" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Boxing</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/cycling" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Cycling</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/hockey" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Hockey</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/sport/tennis" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Tennis</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/your-money" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Your Money</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_your-money" aria-label="Show Your Money sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_your-money"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/tags/pricewatch" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Pricewatch</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/budget/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Budget 2025</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/crime-law" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Crime &amp; Law</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_crime-law" aria-label="Show Crime &amp; Law sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_crime-law"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/crime-law/courts" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Courts</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/property" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Property</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_property" aria-label="Show Property sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_property"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/property/residential" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Residential</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/property/commercial-property" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Commercial Property</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/property/interiors" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Interiors</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/food" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Food</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_food" aria-label="Show Food sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_food"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/food/drink" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Drink</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/food/recipes" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Recipes</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/food/restaurants" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Restaurants</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/health" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Health</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_health" aria-label="Show Health sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_health"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/health/your-family" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Your Family</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/health/your-fitness" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Your Fitness</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/health/your-wellness" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Your Wellness</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/health/your-fitness/get-running" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Get Running</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/life-style" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Life &amp; Style</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_life-style" aria-label="Show Life &amp; Style sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_life-style"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/life-style/fashion" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Fashion</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/tags/beauty/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Beauty</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/life-style/fine-art-antiques" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Fine Art &amp; Antiques</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/life-style/gardening" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Gardening</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/life-style/people" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">People</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/life-style/travel" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Travel</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/culture" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Culture</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_culture" aria-label="Show Culture sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_culture"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/culture/art" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Art</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/culture/books" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Books</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/culture/film" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Film</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/culture/music" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Music</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/culture/stage" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Stage</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/culture/tv-radio" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">TV &amp; Radio</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/environment" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Environment</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_environment" aria-label="Show Environment sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_environment"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/environment/climate-crisis" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Climate Crisis</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link" href="/technology" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Technology</a><button aria-expanded="false" aria-controls="header_sub_section_technology" aria-label="Show Technology sub sections" class="c-button c-button--medium c-button--default submenu-caret" type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="20" height="20" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 416C247.812 416 239.62 412.875 233.38 406.625L41.38 214.625C28.88 202.125 28.88 181.875 41.38 169.375C53.88 156.875 74.13 156.875 86.63 169.375L256 338.8L425.4 169.4C437.9 156.9 458.15 156.9 470.65 169.4C483.15 181.9 483.15 202.15 470.65 214.65L278.65 406.65C272.4 412.9 264.2 416 256 416Z"></path></svg></span></button></div><div class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-container "><ul class="b-header-nav-chain__subsection-menu" id="header_sub_section_technology"><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/technology/big-tech" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Big Tech</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/technology/consumer-tech" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Consumer Tech</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/technology/data-security" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Data &amp; Security</a></li><li class="subsection-item" data-testid="nav-chain-subsection-item"><a class="c-link" href="/technology/gaming" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1">Gaming</a></li></ul></div></li><li class="section-item" data-testid="nav-chain-section-item"><div data-testid="nav-chain-section-item-subsection" class="c-stack b-header-nav-chain__subsection-anchor subsection-anchor " data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" 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data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="center" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="wrap"><a class="c-link false" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/">Ross O&#x27;Carroll-Kelly</a></span></div></div><h1 class="b-it-headline">Honor has picked a theme for her year as Mount Anville head girl: ‘Vengeance’</h1></div></div></div></div><div class="b-it-podcast-subscribe"><p class="c-paragraph">Listen on</p><div class="b-it-podcast-subscribe__items podcastItems"><a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/ie/podcast/ross-ocarroll-kelly/id1005100505?mt=2" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" class="b-it-podcast-subscribe__link">Apple<span class="sr-only">(Opens in new window)</span></a><a href="https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5hY2FzdC5jb20vcHVibGljL3Nob3dzLzhlMjJiMTAwLTA3ODktNWYyMy1iNDI1LTgxZjQ2ZGQxNWUzNg" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" class="b-it-podcast-subscribe__link">Google<span class="sr-only">(Opens in 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‘Hennessy can’t get you out of every legal scrape,’ I say, an out-and-out lie</h2><div class="c-it-audio-player__audio"><div class="c-it-audio-player__placeholder-wrapper"><div><div class="c-stack" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><button class="c-button c-button--small c-button--primary-reverse c-it-audio-player__placeholder-play-button " type="button"><span><svg class="c-icon" width="12" height="12" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M425 215C439.3 223.8 448 239.3 448 256C448 272.7 439.3 288.2 425 296.1L137.03 472.1C122.21 482 103.66 482.4 88.52 473.9C73.377 465.4 64 449.4 64 432V80C64 62.64 73.377 46.63 88.52 38.13C103.66 29.64 122.21 29.99 137.03 39.04L425 215Z"></path></svg></span></button><div class="c-stack c-it-audio-player__placeholder-duration" 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https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/76PFUHT66JBTND3MVBTHPU5NME.jpg?auth=4df7010b0f7f8aa6338f41d1d6323edd485ecf67fd88a110b4d407fd86b41547&amp;smart=true&amp;width=440&amp;height=995 440w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/76PFUHT66JBTND3MVBTHPU5NME.jpg?auth=4df7010b0f7f8aa6338f41d1d6323edd485ecf67fd88a110b4d407fd86b41547&amp;smart=true&amp;width=800&amp;height=1809 800w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/76PFUHT66JBTND3MVBTHPU5NME.jpg?auth=4df7010b0f7f8aa6338f41d1d6323edd485ecf67fd88a110b4d407fd86b41547&amp;smart=true&amp;width=1024&amp;height=2316 1024w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/76PFUHT66JBTND3MVBTHPU5NME.jpg?auth=4df7010b0f7f8aa6338f41d1d6323edd485ecf67fd88a110b4d407fd86b41547&amp;smart=true&amp;width=1440&amp;height=3256 1440w" sizes="(max-width: 400px) 400px, (max-width: 440px) 440px, (max-width: 800px) 800px, (max-width: 1024px) 1024px, (min-width: 1025px) 1440px" width="1024" height="2316"/></div><figcaption class="c-media-item__fig-caption"><span class="c-media-item__caption">Honor answers the phone with her usual 'The fock do you want?' Illustration: Alan Clarke </span></figcaption></figure></div><div class="c-stack b-it-byline-block" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><div class="c-stack b-it-byline-block__text" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="start" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><div class="author"><span class="author-name"><a class="c-link" href="/author/ross-ocarroll-kelly/">Ross O&#x27;Carroll-Kelly</a></span></div><div class="b-it-byline-block__date">Sat Jul 27 2024 - 05:00</div></div></div><div class="c-grid b-it-social-share-block b-it-social-share-block__space-above"><div class="c-stack b-it-social-share-block__container" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="start" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><ul class="c-stack b-it-social-share-block__main-section 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rel="nofollow"><svg class="c-icon" width="48" height="48" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M448 192V77.25c0-8.49-3.37-16.62-9.37-22.63L393.37 9.37c-6-6-14.14-9.37-22.63-9.37H96C78.33 0 64 14.33 64 32v160c-35.35 0-64 28.65-64 64v112c0 8.84 7.16 16 16 16h48v96c0 17.67 14.33 32 32 32h320c17.67 0 32-14.33 32-32v-96h48c8.84 0 16-7.16 16-16V256c0-35.35-28.65-64-64-64zm-64 256H128v-96h256v96zm0-224H128V64h192v48c0 8.84 7.16 16 16 16h48v96zm48 72c-13.25 0-24-10.75-24-24 0-13.26 10.75-24 24-24s24 10.74 24 24c0 13.25-10.75 24-24 24z"></path></svg></a></li></ul></div></div></li></ul></div></div><article class="b-it-article-body article-body-wrapper article-sub-wrapper"><p class="c-paragraph">I’ve never been one of <i>those</i> parents. You know the kind I’m talking about. Their kid does a poo for the first time sitting on a toilet and they’re taking out an ad in The Irish Times to announce the news. It’s genuinely rare that I find myself in a position to say – like I did on Friday – that I’m proud of one of my children. Honor has now completed exactly half of her community service hours for vandalising hundreds of SUVs across south Dublin. I know it’s a low bor that I’ve set for her, but here we are.</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Every morning this week, she has reported for duty, been handed a bottle of vinegar and stiff brush and been told to clean the chewing gum off the Liffey Boardwalk. So when Friday comes, I decide to surprise her by turning up to say fair focks in person. Except when I get there, it’s Mr Grainger, her court-appointed supervisor, who has a surprise for <i>me</i>?</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">He’s like, “I haven’t seen hide nor hair of the girl all day.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “What?”</p><div id="fusion-static-enter:html-block-f0frCB4hReP77YJ-3-5-0" style="display:none" data-fusion-component="html-block-f0frCB4hReP77YJ-3-5-0"></div><div><div style="border-block-start: 4px solid var(--global-neutral-2);font-family:var(--font-family-secondary);font-weight: var(--c-heading-font-weight);font-size:1.1rem; padding-top:0.8rem;margin-top:2rem;">READ MORE</div></div><div id="fusion-static-exit:html-block-f0frCB4hReP77YJ-3-5-0" style="display:none" data-fusion-component="html-block-f0frCB4hReP77YJ-3-5-0"></div><div class="c-grid b-top-table-list"><div class="c-grid b-top-table-list-small-container b-top-table-list-small-container--2"><article class="c-grid b-top-table-list-small b-top-table-list-small--right"><h2 class="c-heading"><a class="c-link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-im-wondering-is-climate-justice-maybe-a-bit-above-santas-pay-grade/">‘Sorcha, I’m wondering is climate justice maybe a bit above Santa’s pay grade?’</a></h2><a class="c-link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-im-wondering-is-climate-justice-maybe-a-bit-above-santas-pay-grade/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1"><figure class="c-media-item"><img data-chromatic="ignore" alt="‘Sorcha, I’m wondering is climate justice maybe a bit above Santa’s pay grade?’" class="c-image" loading="lazy" src="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=800&amp;height=533" srcSet="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=400&amp;height=266 400w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=600&amp;height=399 600w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=800&amp;height=533 800w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=1200&amp;height=799 1200w" width="800" height="533"/></figure></a><hr class="c-divider"/></article><article class="c-grid b-top-table-list-small b-top-table-list-small--right"><h2 class="c-heading"><a class="c-link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-goes-i-make-no-apologies-for-saying-it-honor-you-are-a-danger-to-democracy/">Sorcha goes, ‘I make no apologies for saying it, Honor. You are a danger to democracy’ </a></h2><a class="c-link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-goes-i-make-no-apologies-for-saying-it-honor-you-are-a-danger-to-democracy/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1"><figure class="c-media-item"><img data-chromatic="ignore" alt="Sorcha goes, ‘I make no apologies for saying it, Honor. You are a danger to democracy’ " class="c-image" loading="lazy" src="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/3GAWAJSHXJCJTMLZBVZZPFHE3M.jpg?focal=1217%2C633&amp;auth=939f5f1729cf574b098f7dcf7243dd43d4887394f9f9096955a1b33770d3f2f3&amp;width=800&amp;height=533" srcSet="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/3GAWAJSHXJCJTMLZBVZZPFHE3M.jpg?focal=1217%2C633&amp;auth=939f5f1729cf574b098f7dcf7243dd43d4887394f9f9096955a1b33770d3f2f3&amp;width=400&amp;height=266 400w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/3GAWAJSHXJCJTMLZBVZZPFHE3M.jpg?focal=1217%2C633&amp;auth=939f5f1729cf574b098f7dcf7243dd43d4887394f9f9096955a1b33770d3f2f3&amp;width=600&amp;height=399 600w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/3GAWAJSHXJCJTMLZBVZZPFHE3M.jpg?focal=1217%2C633&amp;auth=939f5f1729cf574b098f7dcf7243dd43d4887394f9f9096955a1b33770d3f2f3&amp;width=800&amp;height=533 800w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/3GAWAJSHXJCJTMLZBVZZPFHE3M.jpg?focal=1217%2C633&amp;auth=939f5f1729cf574b098f7dcf7243dd43d4887394f9f9096955a1b33770d3f2f3&amp;width=1200&amp;height=799 1200w" width="800" height="533"/></figure></a><hr class="c-divider"/></article><article class="c-grid b-top-table-list-small b-top-table-list-small--right"><h2 class="c-heading"><a class="c-link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/when-they-see-the-copper-the-triplets-think-its-about-them-gobbing-on-the-cauliflower-and-turmeric-latte-crowd-which-im-not-even-sure-is-a-crime/">‘When they see the copper, the triplets think it’s about them gobbing on the cauliflower and turmeric latte crowd - which I’m not even sure is a crime’</a></h2><a class="c-link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/when-they-see-the-copper-the-triplets-think-its-about-them-gobbing-on-the-cauliflower-and-turmeric-latte-crowd-which-im-not-even-sure-is-a-crime/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1"><figure class="c-media-item"><img data-chromatic="ignore" alt="‘When they see the copper, the triplets think it’s about them gobbing on the cauliflower and turmeric latte crowd - which I’m not even sure is a crime’" class="c-image" loading="lazy" src="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=800&amp;height=533" srcSet="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=400&amp;height=266 400w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=600&amp;height=399 600w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=800&amp;height=533 800w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=1200&amp;height=799 1200w" width="800" height="533"/></figure></a><hr class="c-divider"/></article><article class="c-grid b-top-table-list-small b-top-table-list-small--right"><h2 class="c-heading"><a class="c-link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/weve-no-idea-what-caused-the-fire-and-were-sticking-to-that-story/">‘We’ve no idea what caused the fire. And we’re sticking to that story’</a></h2><a class="c-link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/weve-no-idea-what-caused-the-fire-and-were-sticking-to-that-story/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1"><figure class="c-media-item"><img data-chromatic="ignore" alt="‘We’ve no idea what caused the fire. And we’re sticking to that story’" class="c-image" loading="lazy" src="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=800&amp;height=533" srcSet="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=400&amp;height=266 400w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=600&amp;height=399 600w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=800&amp;height=533 800w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg?focal=1302%2C975&amp;auth=ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691&amp;width=1200&amp;height=799 1200w" width="800" height="533"/></figure></a><hr class="c-divider"/></article></div></div><p class="c-paragraph paywall">He goes, “She didn’t show up this morning.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m like, “Well, have you tried her mobile?”</p><div id="arcad-feature-f0fA5zOjVt7q5My-3-5-3-865cc731a5499" class="default__StyledAdUnit-sc-1moicrg-0 gKEhzJ arcad-feature"><div class="arcad-container width_100" style="max-width:550px"><div id="arcad_f0fA5zOjVt7q5My-3-5-3-865cc731a5499" class="arcad ad-550x250"></div></div></div><p class="c-paragraph paywall">He goes, “What do you think I’m running here – a juice bar? Someone doesn’t show up, I report them for breaching the terms of their community service order.”</p><p class="c-paragraph b-it-article-body__interstitial-link"><span>[&nbsp;</span><a aria-label="Open related story" class="c-link" href="https://www.irishtimes.com/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/protestants-are-not-that-much-different-from-us-i-mean-theyre-definitely-less-craic-but-they-get-sht-done/" rel="noreferrer" target="_blank">‘Protestants are not that much different from us. I mean, they’re definitely less craic, but they get sh*t done’<span class="visually-hidden">Opens in new window</span></a><span>&nbsp;]</span></p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “Well, is there someone my old man’s solicitor can ring? Someone more senior than you?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I notice the other members of the crew – young criminal types, and that’s not me being judgy – looking me up and down.</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">“Like father, like daughter,” one of them goes.</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Even Mr Grainger has a good chuckle at that one.</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">“This is her third no-show,” he goes. “There’s a good chance they’re going to reset her hours completed to zero. That’s the best-case scenario.”</p><div id="arcad-feature-f0fq2HIufcDr5Mt-3-5-4-13ec1853ca6621" class="default__StyledAdUnit-sc-1moicrg-0 gKEhzJ arcad-feature"><div class="arcad-container width_100" style="max-width:550px"><div id="arcad_f0fq2HIufcDr5Mt-3-5-4-13ec1853ca6621" class="arcad ad-550x250"></div></div></div><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “And worst case?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">And he’s like, “A judge sends her to jail.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “You’re going to be hearing from Hennessy Coghlan-O’Hara. And I’d advise you to brace yourself – we’re talking status focking orange here.”</p><div class="b-it-article-body__quote-wrapper pullquote paywall"><blockquote cite="" class="c-stack b-it-article-body__pullquote" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><p class="c-paragraph">“Hennessy can’t get you out of every legal scrape,” which is an out-and-out lie</p></blockquote></div><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I whip out my phone and I ring Honor. She answers with her usual, “The fock do you want?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “Where are you? And don’t say you’re doing your community service because I’m standing on Bachelors Walk and you didn’t show your face this morning.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">She goes, “I’m taking tea in the Shelbourne,” and those are her exact words.</p><div id="arcad-feature-f0f8wZfBvAILa7G-3-5-5-f85d60b6fc9ed" class="default__StyledAdUnit-sc-1moicrg-0 gKEhzJ arcad-feature"><div class="arcad-container width_100" style="max-width:550px"><div id="arcad_f0f8wZfBvAILa7G-3-5-5-f85d60b6fc9ed" class="arcad ad-550x250"></div></div></div><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “Mr Grainger is reporting you – just so you know.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">She’s like, “Fock him. Hennessy will sort it out.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I go, “Hennessy can’t get you out of every legal scrape,” which is an out-and-out lie. “Sooner or later, you’re going to have to stort taking responsibility for your own actions,” which, again, is another lie. “Stay where you are. I’m on my way.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">When I show up in the Lord Mayor’s Lounge, I discover that Honor is – like she said – <i>taking</i> tea with a woman who’s roughly my old dear’s age and who looks vaguely familiar. It could actually <i>be</i> my old dear, given how often she has work done to her face.</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I hear the woman go, “It’s your year to shine, darling – and you are going to radiate!”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">The woman turns her head and sees me standing there glowering at them. She goes, “Could we get some more clotted cream – there’s a good man.”</p><div id="arcad-feature-f0fNnztKDMLLaTe-3-5-6-3b52a73f4ab39" class="default__StyledAdUnit-sc-1moicrg-0 gKEhzJ arcad-feature"><div class="arcad-container width_100" style="max-width:550px"><div id="arcad_f0fNnztKDMLLaTe-3-5-6-3b52a73f4ab39" class="arcad ad-550x250"></div></div></div><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m like, “Do I <i>look</i> like staff to you?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Honor goes, “Wendy, this is my dad. Dad, this is Wendy Wagoner.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Wendy focking Wagoner. Of course. She’s the PR guru my old dear hired when she was trying to win a Rehab People of the Year Award – except they weren’t giving them out for evil that year.</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">“Oh, yes!” the woman goes, even though she doesn’t know me from a crow.</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “Well, <i>as</i> Honor’s dad, am I allowed to ask what the actual fock is going on here?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Honor’s like, “I’m going to be Mount Anville head girl in, like, four weeks’ time. And I’ve decided that I’m going to need a PA.”</p><div id="arcad-feature-f0fn39YE5eOLals-3-5-7-de4ff4425f675" class="default__StyledAdUnit-sc-1moicrg-0 gKEhzJ arcad-feature"><div class="arcad-container width_100" style="max-width:550px"><div id="arcad_f0fn39YE5eOLals-3-5-7-de4ff4425f675" class="arcad ad-550x250"></div></div></div><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m like, “You’re hiring a PA – to help you be head girl?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">She goes, “Of course I am!”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “Your old dear didn’t have a PA when she did it.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">And she’s like, “There’s a lot more involved in the job now. I’ve got to organise the sixth year skiing trip, the debs and the 24-hour Glamp-Out in aid of homelessness. I’ve to appoint an editor to the school magazine, arrange the Christmas concert and check out destinations for the Leaving Cert holiday. All of that while liaising with teachers to tell them what’s happening.”</p><div class="b-it-article-body__quote-wrapper pullquote paywall"><blockquote cite="Ross" class="c-stack b-it-article-body__pullquote" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><p class="c-paragraph">Oh my God, you’re going to play everyone off against each other to decide who goes – like the Hunger Games, except in Goatstown</p><span class="b-it-article-body__citation">—  <!-- -->Ross</span></blockquote></div><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “Isn’t that why you’re supposed to appoint, like, a deputy head girl?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">But Honor looks at me coldly and goes, “<i>Uno duce, una voce</i> – as Granddad always says.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Wendy – without even looking at me – goes, “Have you thought of a theme for the year yet, Honor?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">And Honor’s like, “Vengeance.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Wendy stares into the mid-distance and goes, “Vengenace – oh, I love this! I’m thinking of a colour palette with lots of hot reds and deep purples!”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa! Vengeance against who? Whom? Who?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">She’s there, “Against all the girls who called me a weirdo over the years. All the girls who didn’t invite me to their porties. All the girls who wrote shit about me on Facebook.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">“So the entire school?” I go.</p><p class="c-paragraph b-it-article-body__interstitial-link"><span>[&nbsp;</span><a aria-label="Open related story" class="c-link" href="https://www.irishtimes.com/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/whats-on-offer-she-goes-smiling-is-eternal-life-and-i-do-believe-shes-flirting/" rel="noreferrer" target="_blank">‘What’s on offer,’ she goes, smiling, ‘is eternal life,’ and I do believe she’s flirting<span class="visually-hidden">Opens in new window</span></a><span>&nbsp;]</span></p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">She’s like, “Plus the teachers who said that I’d never amount to anything in life.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">“In fairness to them,” I go, “Mr Grainger mentioned a judge possibly sending you to prison.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Wendy goes, “And what about a tone for the year? Have you thought about what the tone might be?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Honor’s like, “Yes, I have, Wendy – chaos.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">“Chaos!” Wendy goes. “Oh, I love this! Chaos is transformation and transformation is – ” and she makes inverted commas with her fingers, ” – good!”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Honor’s there, “But my first job is to arrange the October skiing trip.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">And Wendy’s like, “Where were you thinking in terms of, Honor?”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Honor goes, “My granddad, Chorles, has a time-share in this – oh my God – amazing villa in St Moritz.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">Wendy goes, “St Moritz! Perfect!”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">I’m there, “Honor, that place only holds, like, 50 people,” and as I’m saying it the penny suddenly drops. “Oh my God, you’re going to play everyone off against each other to decide who goes – like the Hunger Games, except in Goatstown.”</p><p class="c-paragraph paywall">And Honor just goes, “Let the fun begin!”</p></article><div class="c-stack b-author-bio" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><div class="c-stack b-author-bio__author" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><img data-chromatic="ignore" alt="Ross O&#x27;Carroll-Kelly" class="c-image" loading="lazy" src="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/https%3A%2F%2Fs3.amazonaws.com%2Farc-authors%2Firishtimes%2Fae88b965-43f0-4844-8f25-cd93be8ea9eb.png?smart=true&amp;auth=a7f82c79c21dbf8dae2dc8d82177c7652492ca171ebcd4c9e57ededf184299d4&amp;width=100&amp;height=100" srcSet="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/https%3A%2F%2Fs3.amazonaws.com%2Farc-authors%2Firishtimes%2Fae88b965-43f0-4844-8f25-cd93be8ea9eb.png?smart=true&amp;auth=a7f82c79c21dbf8dae2dc8d82177c7652492ca171ebcd4c9e57ededf184299d4&amp;width=100&amp;height=100 100w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/https%3A%2F%2Fs3.amazonaws.com%2Farc-authors%2Firishtimes%2Fae88b965-43f0-4844-8f25-cd93be8ea9eb.png?smart=true&amp;auth=a7f82c79c21dbf8dae2dc8d82177c7652492ca171ebcd4c9e57ededf184299d4&amp;width=200&amp;height=200 200w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/https%3A%2F%2Fs3.amazonaws.com%2Farc-authors%2Firishtimes%2Fae88b965-43f0-4844-8f25-cd93be8ea9eb.png?smart=true&amp;auth=a7f82c79c21dbf8dae2dc8d82177c7652492ca171ebcd4c9e57ededf184299d4&amp;width=400&amp;height=400 400w" width="100" height="100"/><div class="c-stack" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><a class="c-link b-author-bio__author-name-link" href="/author/ross-ocarroll-kelly/"><h2 class="c-heading b-author-bio__author-name">Ross O&#x27;Carroll-Kelly</h2></a><p class="c-paragraph b-author-bio__author-description">Ross O’Carroll-Kelly was captain of the Castlerock College team that won the Leinster Schools Senior Cup in 1999. 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data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="wrap"><a class="c-link false" href="/podcasts/inside-politics/">Inside Politics Podcast</a></span></div></div></div><div class="b-flex-promo-card__text-no-overline"><h3 class="c-heading c-heading__sm text-align_left"><a class="c-link font-bold" href="/podcasts/inside-politics/election-daily-surprises-upsets-and-ousters-as-the-final-seats-are-filled/">Election Daily: surprises, upsets and ousters as the final seats are filled</a></h3><div class="b-flex-promo-card__audio"><button aria-label="Listen to Election Daily: surprises, upsets and ousters as the final seats are filled" class="c-button c-button--small c-button--primary-reverse" type="button"><svg class="c-icon" width="48" height="48" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M425 215C439.3 223.8 448 239.3 448 256C448 272.7 439.3 288.2 425 296.1L137.03 472.1C122.21 482 103.66 482.4 88.52 473.9C73.377 465.4 64 449.4 64 432V80C64 62.64 73.377 46.63 88.52 38.13C103.66 29.64 122.21 29.99 137.03 39.04L425 215Z"></path></svg></button><span class="b-flex-promo-card__audio-text">Listen | <!-- -->26:26</span></div></div></div></article></div></div><div class="c-stack grid-item " data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><div class="c-stack b-flex-promo-list-block" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap" style="--c-stack-gap:1rem"><article class="b-flex-promo-card bottom-divider"><figure class="c-media-item"><div style="aspect-ratio:1;background-color:var(--global-neutral-1)" class=""><a class="c-link b-flex-promo-card__link" href="/podcasts/the-womens-podcast/inside-afghanistans-secret-schools-for-girls-we-dont-talk-about-our-students-to-anyone/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1"><img data-chromatic="ignore" alt="Inside Afghanistan’s secret schools for girls: ‘We don’t talk about our students to anyone’" class="c-image" loading="lazy" src="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/DSFTFUIBYJHJNPJQNMDB4VW6LE.png?smart=true&amp;auth=eae232bd9995dbe969920a01daba469f327f25242eee3dc1a272c3a10b7397eb&amp;width=800&amp;height=800" srcSet="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/DSFTFUIBYJHJNPJQNMDB4VW6LE.png?smart=true&amp;auth=eae232bd9995dbe969920a01daba469f327f25242eee3dc1a272c3a10b7397eb&amp;width=400&amp;height=400 400w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/DSFTFUIBYJHJNPJQNMDB4VW6LE.png?smart=true&amp;auth=eae232bd9995dbe969920a01daba469f327f25242eee3dc1a272c3a10b7397eb&amp;width=440&amp;height=440 440w, https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/DSFTFUIBYJHJNPJQNMDB4VW6LE.png?smart=true&amp;auth=eae232bd9995dbe969920a01daba469f327f25242eee3dc1a272c3a10b7397eb&amp;width=800&amp;height=800 800w" sizes="(max-width: 400px) 400px, (max-width: 440px) 440px, (min-width: 441px) 800px" width="800" height="800"/></a></div></figure><div class="b-flex-promo-card__text"><div class="c-stack c-audio-overline" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap" style="--c-stack-gap:0.5rem"><svg class="c-icon" width="22" height="19" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="#000000" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M256 32C114.52 32 0 146.496 0 288v48a32 32 0 0 0 17.689 28.622l14.383 7.191C34.083 431.903 83.421 480 144 480h24c13.255 0 24-10.745 24-24V280c0-13.255-10.745-24-24-24h-24c-31.342 0-59.671 12.879-80 33.627V288c0-105.869 86.131-192 192-192s192 86.131 192 192v1.627C427.671 268.879 399.342 256 368 256h-24c-13.255 0-24 10.745-24 24v176c0 13.255 10.745 24 24 24h24c60.579 0 109.917-48.098 111.928-108.187l14.382-7.191A32 32 0 0 0 512 336v-48c0-141.479-114.496-256-256-256z"></path></svg><div class="c-grid b-it-overline-block"><div class="c-stack wrap" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="start" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap" style="--c-stack-gap:0"><span class="c-stack b-it-overline-block__text" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="center" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="wrap"><a class="c-link false" href="/podcasts/the-womens-podcast/">The Women&#x27;s Podcast</a></span></div></div></div><div class="b-flex-promo-card__text-no-overline"><h3 class="c-heading c-heading__sm text-align_left"><a class="c-link font-bold" href="/podcasts/the-womens-podcast/inside-afghanistans-secret-schools-for-girls-we-dont-talk-about-our-students-to-anyone/">Inside Afghanistan’s secret schools for girls: ‘We don’t talk about our students to anyone’</a></h3><div class="b-flex-promo-card__audio"><button aria-label="Listen to Inside Afghanistan’s secret schools for girls: ‘We don’t talk about our students to anyone’" class="c-button c-button--small c-button--primary-reverse" type="button"><svg class="c-icon" width="48" height="48" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M425 215C439.3 223.8 448 239.3 448 256C448 272.7 439.3 288.2 425 296.1L137.03 472.1C122.21 482 103.66 482.4 88.52 473.9C73.377 465.4 64 449.4 64 432V80C64 62.64 73.377 46.63 88.52 38.13C103.66 29.64 122.21 29.99 137.03 39.04L425 215Z"></path></svg></button><span class="b-flex-promo-card__audio-text">Listen | <!-- -->49:36</span></div></div></div></article></div></div><div class="c-stack grid-item " data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><div class="c-stack b-flex-promo-list-block" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap" style="--c-stack-gap:1rem"><article class="b-flex-promo-card bottom-divider"><figure class="c-media-item"><div style="aspect-ratio:1;background-color:var(--global-neutral-1)" class=""><a class="c-link b-flex-promo-card__link" href="/podcasts/inside-business/ireland-is-on-a-winning-streak-the-outsiders-view-of-our-economy/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1"><img data-chromatic="ignore" alt="‘Ireland is on a winning streak’: The outsider’s view of our economy" class="c-image" loading="lazy" src="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/CNU6B45BI5CJLD6UDOBGZM7G4I.JPG?smart=true&amp;auth=c1790a22ce22263bb8538479a05532c2558c83907b6127dd398c4ff1dfb57e4b&amp;width=800&amp;height=800" srcSet="https://www.irishtimes.com/resizer/v2/CNU6B45BI5CJLD6UDOBGZM7G4I.JPG?smart=true&amp;auth=c1790a22ce22263bb8538479a05532c2558c83907b6127dd398c4ff1dfb57e4b&amp;width=400&amp;height=400 400w, 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7.191C34.083 431.903 83.421 480 144 480h24c13.255 0 24-10.745 24-24V280c0-13.255-10.745-24-24-24h-24c-31.342 0-59.671 12.879-80 33.627V288c0-105.869 86.131-192 192-192s192 86.131 192 192v1.627C427.671 268.879 399.342 256 368 256h-24c-13.255 0-24 10.745-24 24v176c0 13.255 10.745 24 24 24h24c60.579 0 109.917-48.098 111.928-108.187l14.382-7.191A32 32 0 0 0 512 336v-48c0-141.479-114.496-256-256-256z"></path></svg><div class="c-grid b-it-overline-block"><div class="c-stack wrap" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="start" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap" style="--c-stack-gap:0"><span class="c-stack b-it-overline-block__text" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="center" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="wrap"><a class="c-link false" href="/podcasts/inside-business/">Inside Business Podcast</a></span></div></div></div><div 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-->38:58</span></div></div></div></article></div></div><div class="c-stack grid-item " data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><div class="c-stack b-flex-promo-list-block" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap" style="--c-stack-gap:1rem"><article class="b-flex-promo-card"><figure class="c-media-item"><div style="aspect-ratio:1;background-color:var(--global-neutral-1)" class=""><a class="c-link b-flex-promo-card__link" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-im-wondering-is-climate-justice-maybe-a-bit-above-santas-pay-grade/" aria-hidden="true" tabindex="-1"><img data-chromatic="ignore" alt="‘Sorcha, I’m wondering is climate justice maybe a bit above Santa’s pay grade?’" class="c-image" loading="lazy" 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data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap" style="--c-stack-gap:0"><span class="c-stack b-it-overline-block__text" data-style-direction="horizontal" data-style-justification="center" data-style-alignment="center" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="wrap"><a class="c-link false" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/">Ross O&#x27;Carroll-Kelly</a></span></div></div></div><div class="b-flex-promo-card__text-no-overline"><h3 class="c-heading c-heading__sm text-align_left"><a class="c-link font-bold" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-im-wondering-is-climate-justice-maybe-a-bit-above-santas-pay-grade/">‘Sorcha, I’m wondering is climate justice maybe a bit above Santa’s pay grade?’</a></h3><div class="b-flex-promo-card__audio"><button aria-label="Listen to ‘Sorcha, I’m wondering is climate justice maybe a bit above Santa’s pay grade?’" class="c-button c-button--small c-button--primary-reverse" type="button"><svg class="c-icon" width="48" height="48" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M425 215C439.3 223.8 448 239.3 448 256C448 272.7 439.3 288.2 425 296.1L137.03 472.1C122.21 482 103.66 482.4 88.52 473.9C73.377 465.4 64 449.4 64 432V80C64 62.64 73.377 46.63 88.52 38.13C103.66 29.64 122.21 29.99 137.03 39.04L425 215Z"></path></svg></button><span class="b-flex-promo-card__audio-text">Listen | <!-- -->06:22</span></div></div></div></article></div></div><div class="c-stack grid-item " data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap"><div class="c-stack b-flex-promo-list-block" data-style-direction="vertical" data-style-justification="start" data-style-alignment="unset" data-style-inline="false" data-style-wrap="nowrap" style="--c-stack-gap:1rem"><article class="b-flex-promo-card"><figure class="c-media-item"><div 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Ireland go after the Autumn Nations Series?</a></h3><div class="b-flex-promo-card__audio"><button aria-label="Listen to Where do Ireland go after the Autumn Nations Series?" class="c-button c-button--small c-button--primary-reverse" type="button"><svg class="c-icon" width="48" height="48" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M425 215C439.3 223.8 448 239.3 448 256C448 272.7 439.3 288.2 425 296.1L137.03 472.1C122.21 482 103.66 482.4 88.52 473.9C73.377 465.4 64 449.4 64 432V80C64 62.64 73.377 46.63 88.52 38.13C103.66 29.64 122.21 29.99 137.03 39.04L425 215Z"></path></svg></button><span class="b-flex-promo-card__audio-text">Listen | <!-- -->41:54</span></div></div></div></article></div></div></div></div></div><hr class="c-divider b-it-divider-block"/><div id="arcad-feature-f0fu43ByG55579z-b8fd60130b367" class="default__StyledAdUnit-sc-1moicrg-0 gKEhzJ arcad-feature"><div class="arcad-container width_100" 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width="48" height="48" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" viewBox="0 0 512 512" fill="currentColor" aria-hidden="true" focusable="false"><path d="M425 215C439.3 223.8 448 239.3 448 256C448 272.7 439.3 288.2 425 296.1L137.03 472.1C122.21 482 103.66 482.4 88.52 473.9C73.377 465.4 64 449.4 64 432V80C64 62.64 73.377 46.63 88.52 38.13C103.66 29.64 122.21 29.99 137.03 39.04L425 215Z"></path></svg></button><span class="b-flex-promo-card__audio-text">Listen | <!-- -->06:22</span></div></div></div></article><article class="b-flex-promo-card bottom-divider"><div class="b-flex-promo-card__text"><div class="b-flex-promo-card__text-no-overline"><h3 class="c-heading c-heading__md-sm text-align_left"><a class="c-link font-bold" href="/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-goes-i-make-no-apologies-for-saying-it-honor-you-are-a-danger-to-democracy/">Sorcha goes, ‘I make no apologies for saying it, Honor. 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Chaos is transformation and transformation is – ” and she makes inverted commas with her fingers, ” – good!”","type":"text","paywall":"paywall"},{"_id":"NGAY3GIXAJHUNC2CB2GABIQ2DY","additional_properties":{"_id":1721642685924,"comments":[],"inline_comments":[]},"content":"Honor’s there, “But my first job is to arrange the October skiing trip.”","type":"text","paywall":"paywall"},{"_id":"2AV32CFM5BGXZHLQJ544OS6B7Q","additional_properties":{"_id":1721642685925,"comments":[],"inline_comments":[]},"content":"And Wendy’s like, “Where were you thinking in terms of, Honor?”","type":"text","paywall":"paywall"},{"_id":"PHLWW2GONFF6ZIFIMXY5QQDJNQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1721642685926,"comments":[],"inline_comments":[]},"content":"Honor goes, “My granddad, Chorles, has a time-share in this – oh my God – amazing villa in St Moritz.”","type":"text","paywall":"paywall"},{"_id":"3VOA5WLWF5EKNOSSELZFMBH7C4","additional_properties":{"_id":1721642685927,"comments":[],"inline_comments":[]},"content":"Wendy goes, “St Moritz! Perfect!”","type":"text","paywall":"paywall"},{"_id":"C3TGP4I3SRHQBBCC4JVIJWKXPM","additional_properties":{"_id":1721642685928,"comments":[],"inline_comments":[]},"content":"I’m there, “Honor, that place only holds, like, 50 people,” and as I’m saying it the penny suddenly drops. “Oh my God, you’re going to play everyone off against each other to decide who goes – like the Hunger Games, except in Goatstown.”","type":"text","paywall":"paywall"},{"_id":"NW7JI75GDNFX3ONWVQDXXE2WEI","additional_properties":{"_id":1721642685929,"comments":[],"inline_comments":[]},"content":"And Honor just goes, “Let the fun begin!”","type":"text","paywall":"paywall"}],"content_restrictions":{"content_code":"premium"},"copyright":"","created_date":"2024-07-22T07:54:36.381Z","credits":{"by":[{"_id":"ross-ocarroll-kelly","type":"author","version":"0.5.8","name":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly","image":{"url":"https://s3.amazonaws.com/arc-authors/irishtimes/ae88b965-43f0-4844-8f25-cd93be8ea9eb.png","version":"0.5.8","type":"image","auth":{"1":"a7f82c79c21dbf8dae2dc8d82177c7652492ca171ebcd4c9e57ededf184299d4"}},"description":"Ross O’Carroll-Kelly was captain of the Castlerock College team that won the Leinster Schools Senior Cup in 1999. It’s rare that a day goes by when he doesn’t mention it","url":"/author/ross-ocarroll-kelly/","slug":"ross-ocarroll-kelly","social_links":[{"site":"email","url":"magazine@irishtimes.com"},{"site":"facebook","url":null},{"site":"twitter","url":"RossOCK"}],"socialLinks":[{"site":"email","url":"magazine@irishtimes.com","deprecated":true,"deprecation_msg":"Please use social_links."},{"site":"facebook","url":null,"deprecated":true,"deprecation_msg":"Please use social_links."},{"site":"twitter","url":"RossOCK","deprecated":true,"deprecation_msg":"Please use social_links."}],"additional_properties":{"original":{"_id":"ross-ocarroll-kelly","byline":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly","slug":"ross-ocarroll-kelly","firstName":"Ross","lastName":"O'Carroll-Kelly","middleName":null,"bio":"Ross O’Carroll-Kelly was captain of the Castlerock College team that won the Leinster Schools Senior Cup in 1999. 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He said Athlone had a long tradition of providing accommodation and support to people seeking international protection, with one of the first direct provision centres in the State constructed on the adjoining Lissywollen site in 2001.","type":"text"},{"_id":"VLZKE76RIBHP5NC4TRI4SMFZBY","additional_properties":{"_id":1733164828320},"content":"Mr Hogan said he and other members of <a href=\"https://www.irishtimes.com/tags/westmeath-county-council/\" target=\"_blank\">Westmeath County Council</a> believed the proposed development would be “prejudicial to public health” as local health services are already overburdened.","type":"text"},{"_id":"YCDY6C2IB5FUNMX3YVDX7FFP3I","additional_properties":{},"type":"list"}],"content_restrictions":{"content_code":"metered"},"credits":{"by":[{"additional_properties":{"original":{"byline":"Ellen O'Riordan"}},"name":"Ellen O'Riordan"}]},"description":{"basic":"Councillor Paul Hogan’s case is supported by four other Athlone-based representatives"},"display_date":"2024-12-02T20:11:31.025Z","headlines":{"basic":"Plan to house 1,000 male asylum seekers on Athlone site subject of High Court challenge","native":""},"label":{"audio_project_id":{"text":"8948"}},"promo_items":{"basic":{"_id":"HMUHRFUC7ZB5JIPJYNLDF6RNYU","auth":{"1":"52fbef096d59db631b44afa5851ffee4e1ad9c16b3d8499ce121df32cac15029"},"focal_point":{"x":1446,"y":936},"url":"https://cloudfront-eu-central-1.images.arcpublishing.com/irishtimes/HMUHRFUC7ZB5JIPJYNLDF6RNYU.JPG"}},"subtype":"default","taxonomy":{"sections":[{"name":"Courts"},{"name":"Crime & Law"}]},"type":"story","website_url":"/crime-law/courts/2024/12/02/plan-to-house-1000-male-asylum-seekers-on-athlone-site-subject-of-high-court-challenge/","websites":{"irishtimes":{"website_section":{"_id":"/crime-law/courts","additional_properties":{"original":{}},"name":"Courts"}}}},{"_id":"S7VRXCLZW5FVHLY4CA4CUIIEFE","additional_properties":{"audio_duration":236,"audio_url":"https://beyondwords-h0e8gjgjaqe0egb7.a03.azurefd.net/audio/projects/8948/podcasts/01ca9a30-f6ca-4803-a5e6-63d0a0baec64/versions/1733170496/media/bfdf43a4634f097677899e6d3f164c8b_compiled.mp3"},"canonical_url":"/world/uk/2024/12/02/downing-street-comments-on-gregg-wallace-allegations-indicative-of-pressure-on-bbc/","content_elements":[{"_id":"OOTCZVLDZBHWDCYYRZFWZU3N5I","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912678},"content":"The willingness of 10 Downing Street to wade in to the sexual comments controversy surrounding television show Masterchef presenter <a href=\"https://www.irishtimes.com/tags/gregg-wallace/\" target=\"_blank\">Gregg Wallace </a>underlines the intensity of public scrutiny in Britain on the <a href=\"https://www.irishtimes.com/tags/bbc/\" target=\"_blank\">BBC</a> about such matters, especially after the <a href=\"https://www.irishtimes.com/tags/huw-edwards/\" target=\"_blank\">Huw Edwards</a> scandal.","type":"text"},{"_id":"ZMNSCSLIY5AUJA6E7V2A5QSW7Q","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912679},"content":"There is a big difference between the allegations against Wallace, accused of making inappropriate comments to staff and contestants, and the former BBC newsreader Edwards, a convicted sex offender who has pleaded guilty to making indecent images of children.","type":"text"},{"_id":"MLM6PSRT3FAW3C5H7XU4DJ6IOA","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912680},"content":"What the separate scandals share, however, is the ability to drag under the microscope the actions of BBC as an institution, as well as actions of the two presenters. In the latest case involving Masterchef, what did BBC know and when, and why did it not take firm action sooner?","type":"text"},{"_id":"ZV63GWIS7RHHZFRHCWM5RYSQ6I","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912681},"content":"Wallace has been accused by at least 13 women of inappropriate behaviour on the cooking show franchise and has agreed to “step away” while BBC and producers conduct investigations. 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His lawyers have denied any suggestions of sexual harassment.","type":"text"},{"_id":"B4OFPFYLYZA6TEZAU7LG2OTBAM","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912683},"content":"The BBC has not named the women who gave statements, but among those to have complained about Wallace in public are television star Ulrika Jonsson, former Newsnight presenter Kirsty Wark and Kirstie Allsop, a Channel 4 presenter who participated in Celebrity Masterchef.","type":"text"},{"_id":"I4EMXPX4CRFXXDCBK5B4QDHAPM","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912684},"content":"Wallace chose at the weekend to effectively play the class card by dismissing the complainants against him, a man from working class stock, as coming from “middle class women of a certain age”.","type":"text"},{"_id":"3EHX4WBYCRCNDNP7347IEMVZR4","additional_properties":{"_id":1733170161371},"content":"It was a provocative intervention and Wallace backtracked on Monday and said sorry.","type":"text"},{"_id":"OKJ5735RYVEXPFNKMRJ5JFQHAY","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912685},"content":"“I wasn’t in a good head space when I posted” the comments, he said.","type":"text"},{"_id":"5WXCS5M22FAJDGJHNONLLP4TSE","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912686},"content":"They were sufficient to draw a response from prime minister Keir Starmer’s office, illustrating the sensitivity there is in Britain about the beloved “Beeb” and sex scandals. Number 10 said Wallace’s clumsy attempt at defence over the weekend was “inappropriate and misogynistic”.","type":"text"},{"_id":"L2DGNPE6YVEQTDVM5HB5H7LAHA","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912687},"content":"It was also confirmed at a government briefing with Westminster journalists that culture secretary Lisa Nandy had already held talks with BBC executives over the Wallace allegations, as government nervousness about the issue grows.","type":"text"},{"_id":"GM7CQFPPUZFL3I7V7MSJMYTKDA","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912688},"content":"Rupa Huq, a Labour MP, has even called on the BBC to suspend the latest series of Masterchef: The Professionals. She suggested it would be “massively triggering” for some women to put it on the air.","type":"text"},{"_id":"NOL3FGLRRFHZJJLRC5HO73OCVY","additional_properties":{"_id":1733170161376},"content":"On Monday the BBC stood firm, however, and was due to broadcast the show that night while it also insisted the Masterchef Christmas special would go ahead as planned.","type":"text"},{"_id":"X5GUBYAVPNENHCGOMD5YNK47M4","additional_properties":{"_id":1733165912689},"content":"Scrutiny of the BBC is heightened by the fact that it has known about some of the allegations since at least 2017. It gave Wallace a warning in 2018 but allowed him to continue in his role.","type":"text"},{"_id":"BBB3UJV6FBAXNCPEGR5YBYM6DQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1733170161378},"content":"Actress Emma Kennedy, however, has said she complained about him as far back as 2012. 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It’s also corbon-neutral in the sense that any CO2 emissions caused by its production were offset by methods to remove it from the atmosphere!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UDBAHZCIWRGCDLRK4HYLFAWQMM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887849},"content":"You can almost hear the Christmas joy being sucked out of the room.","type":"text"},{"_id":"RXD35RBKZJGNLB3AKTTWFWCSIE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887850},"content":"Honor’s like, “I’m sure you’ll make sure to mention that in your Instagram post.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"TQLVX6HMCBGIDGTTDUDOVZJFL4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887851},"content":"“Also,” Sorcha goes, producing a pen, “we’re going to write it using a soy-based ink, which has a far less hormful environmental impact than petroleum-based inks.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QWDPSDCPKZAW3E4BRJZJNYD5NI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887852},"content":"“People are just going to think you’re a knob,” Honor goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"XCT66VHFWNC3DCH4HGAW6BHREE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887853},"content":"Sorcha just ignores her. She takes a page from the box and goes, “Okay, we’ll stort with the address. Obviously, it’s different from last year. We won’t go into details about the fire. We’ll just say that we’re living with Grandma and Grandpa Lalor for now. Okay, here we go. I’ll put ‘Dear Santa’. Then I’ll stort off by saying that we hope he and Mrs Claus are keeping well, despite the fact that the North Pole is, like, 20 degrees warmer than it was a century ago. And I’ll say that you’ve been very, very good boys this year.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"YCXYVAIIANFXXG3JYQ7X4MFC44","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887854},"content":"I’m there, “Again, we won’t mention the fire.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"J2KWZYKWZFCZPMDUS2ETZISTDU","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887855},"content":"She goes, “Right, what we do want for Christmas – as in, what do we, like, <i>really</i> want?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PSTGHOL74VDNXAKQGDOT2T7AIY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887856},"content":"I’m there, “Johnny mentioned a bike.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"4C37SUOE4FBW5BQML7ZHPPYJR4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887857},"content":"“A focking bike,” Johnny goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"SBDX6W76PNE5DHAQHJG6LCZB7E","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887858},"content":"I’m like, “A <i>focking</i> bike. I stand corrected.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6SO6FH3XU5ETPDF62V4G2FZYBU","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887859},"content":"Sorcha goes, “Why don’t we – just for one year – ask for gifts that are slightly more, I don’t know, <i>ethereal</i>?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"ZCPLLGR7FJEU7LSTISYA4EKNFA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887860},"content":"The three boys look at me for an explanation.","type":"text"},{"_id":"6EWSMX336NAJLNX3VPUTKDC7TY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887861},"content":"I’m there, “I haven’t a clue, goys. I was on the senior cup team, bear in mind?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UVAWMDGF3JFWZHPTQ55SJXDT54","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887862},"content":"Honor goes, “It means things that don’t cost any money.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"OPGT7JHWE5DH5LEN5XWXQFPPAY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887863},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “It means spiritual things.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"BVL6JHDBHVGSZMUJ7F5SOG6XCY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887864},"content":"“Oh my God,” Honor goes, “this is totally for Instagram. People will say that your children are going to grow up to hate you.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"YNWVANDE6NAXTDACIDPQQFVLJQ","additional_properties":{"_id":"IEH52E4JYRBNLG7KZVQ5CSEYQI"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"VTHGUIFPLJCTZI473AJ5MG4D3U","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887865},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “Why don’t we ask for – just as an example – peace on Earth.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"I3XVS5NWHFCW3O2CWCSE6FEYE4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887866},"content":"I’m like, “Is that not–?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"JB7NMP4XNBE6PNNH6WI3HARGRU","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887867},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “What?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"N6VTZYWV7BCFHM63RZV6TZESKE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887868},"content":"“Well, God’s deportment?” I go. “I mean, Santa is just a dude who runs a workshop where he makes <i>toys</i> all year round?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UYTK6OVPSZHKJNIKFVRGQTQKEI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887869},"content":"“I’m putting down peace on Earth,” Sorcha goes, then she writes the words. “Okay, what else? What about climate justice?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UYABWATWWBH55FKGKSXEP34HFQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887870},"content":"“The fock is that?” Leo goes – and he’s well within his rights.","type":"text"},{"_id":"4QVFKMZNRBCWPHPVEEJ232YSQE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887871},"content":"I’m there, “Again, Sorcha, I’m wondering is climate justice maybe a bit above<i> </i>Santa’s pay grade?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PRFTH4X56RGILDKNREC45KOAGY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887872},"content":"She’s there, “I’m going to ask him for a stabilisation in our emission of greenhouse gases in the short term to at least put off the global catastrophe that’s coming our way. And also more windmills and solar panels for the world. Okay, what else?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"BNSRGNPPFNDCXM6G3VQXLORXL4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887873},"content":"“A mini Ferrrari,” Brian goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"H6CJ6ZUA4ZEVBG5A6MJ3PHAWXE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887874},"content":"And Sorcha’s like, “Again, Brian, we’re trying to think of less <i>tangible</i> things?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"H35MRV3MARFGFBBA7EPCOF4XS4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887875},"content":"He looks at me.","type":"text"},{"_id":"Z7FG776LIBAQRFXXQ35MXHUROE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887876},"content":"I’m there, “Jesus Christ, Brian, you’d a bigger vocabulary than me when you were five.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PAB7UY7IJFH3PMEO7QIETC46W4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887877},"content":"“Come on, what else?” Sorcha goes. “What if we just ask Santa to keep us all safe and healthy during the coming year?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"FJG6PZBU5RCW3EI2AIG45TNAKA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887878},"content":"I’m there, “Again, I see Santa as the boss of a humungous Amazon-type warehouse in the snowy wilds of wherever. I think we’re asking a bit much from him. He might think we’re ripping the piss.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"GPRTL67GXJEDNJSZSB7P5IT3CM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887879},"content":"But Sorcha goes, “Ross, he and Mrs Claus live on a sheet of ice that has thinned by almost 50 per cent in the last 50 years. Actually, I’ll mention that in the letter. Then I’ll sign off by saying that this is your wish for Christmas and you don’t want any material gifts this year.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"TC5KHUQPEFCF7E3JLN7GSD23HY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887880},"content":"Johnny’s like, “What the fock?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"LYA653YEZRH3FDANNN6NH7PULE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887881},"content":"“This is going to be the shittest Christmas ever,” Honor goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"44OWHQJNHBBTHBMGMK7HLMOO4Y","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887882},"content":"I’m there, “It’s definitely shaping up that way.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"X2577G7KSRGYHGZ57ASQSLN4QM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887883},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “Lots of love, Honor, Brian, Johnny and Leo.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"57ZP5MEUBFAILGHVMHJOEL6FJA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887884},"content":"I’m like, “Sorcha, just to repeat what Johnny said, what the fock?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"AJ5SGVMC4FEEXNMXB7KWK7KYZA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887885},"content":"She goes, “Right, I’m going to go and make some more hot chocolate,” and she takes the letter and heads for the kitchen.","type":"text"},{"_id":"PIHG4YAL2BAD3LRRNXJ3OL7HMQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887886},"content":"Leo’s like, “Are we getting no presents from Santa?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"XLXCCRE5SZFALCDEZ6WHDPAXTU","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887887},"content":"Honor’s there, “Don’t worry – it’s just our mother looking for likes from strangers again.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"IYLZI6ZBPZDVBAOYVBFV4OEXJM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887888},"content":"I go, “Has she posted it yet?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"5XVDULP5OVANXB27XGY4K7T6D4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887889},"content":"Honor checks her phone.","type":"text"},{"_id":"BB5T7VMN7BES5NTU5V2EY7FTWI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887890},"content":"She’s there, “Yeah – 30 seconds ago.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"GYQ37XNOH5AJTMHIC6RXBB2RVE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887891},"content":"I’m like, “Any responses yet?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"VUZTIUMOHJAMZB7AQBWKRPSIMI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887892},"content":"“One,” Honor goes. “Someone called her a knob. Oh, and someone else just said that her kids would grow up to hate her.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"H6GGYSSZS5A5FKXHBOB623DLCQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887893},"content":"“Right,” I go, “let’s write your real list before she comes back. 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We’ve the Bublé CD on and we’re all wearing our Christmas jumpers. Mine has a picture of Tadhg Furlong, Dan Sheehan and Andrew Porter wearing Santa hats and the words “O Scrum All Ye Faithful” on it. Sorcha has made hot chocolate for everyone and I’m sitting there with my pen poised.","type":"text"},{"_id":"XPB2U7AK65CMZFBTRC7RXEPGYA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887838},"content":"Johnny’s like, “A focking bike!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"W4EWGFUCPNEPLAYXWHR3MEN5PQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887839},"content":"Leo’s there, “An electric guitor!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7W4XWYME6RCNLDE3YM6O5SSFD4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887840},"content":"Brian goes, “A mini Ferrari!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"FCRP6LDVKNG2BMNTONFIBZVVOA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887841},"content":"And I’m like, “Whoa, whoa, whoa! Go slower, goys,” because I’m struggling to get it all down on paper.","type":"text"},{"_id":"GEKZTEGAL5GL3HZ5YBPJVKUFF4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887842},"content":"But that’s when Sorcha decides to put an end to the fun.","type":"text"},{"_id":"Y7BQQP7PLZCVVK6VYAHCDAEOOY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887843},"content":"She goes, “We’re not just going to throw everything down on paper as it occurs to us. We’re going to write a more <i>considered</i> letter to Santa this year?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"NISVQJJX4ZDT5IU4ZRMVCDZCEY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887844},"content":"The boys look at me as if to say, “Talk to your wife, will you? It sounds like she’s having another one of her wobbles.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"I4NXX3XH7ZGHHJDYVIRNDCDOFE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887845},"content":"Honor goes, “Oh my God, does this have anything to do with the letter that JP and Chloe wrote last year?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"I4WWEPPHORHDPJN4WSVWQXLLRM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887846},"content":"Yeah, no, long story short, JP and Chloe posted little Isa’s Santa letter on Instagram – it was very cute, in fairness to it – and it ended up going viral. And I remember Sorcha complaining at the time that our Santa letters had all the chorm of a ransom note, containing, as they did, nothing more than a list of demands and instructions.","type":"text"},{"_id":"RYMD7Q5VEJFFFB7KHTIDKDYKVY","additional_properties":{"_id":"5VKJRJMLBZHS7CWKE7GOXHVRYQ"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"WFDPZAILQRGLFA6CMDNSUMS7OA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887847},"content":"Sorcha produces a small box, which it turns out contains writing paper – and not just ordinary writing paper either.","type":"text"},{"_id":"6TZPO7TTEZHG7JJT64YRD2R3RI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887848},"content":"“It’s from a fully sustainable source!” Sorcha goes. “Meaning it was produced using virgin fibres from a Forest Stewardship Council-certified wood, adhering to the strictest environmental, social and economic standards! It’s also corbon-neutral in the sense that any CO2 emissions caused by its production were offset by methods to remove it from the atmosphere!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UDBAHZCIWRGCDLRK4HYLFAWQMM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887849},"content":"You can almost hear the Christmas joy being sucked out of the room.","type":"text"},{"_id":"RXD35RBKZJGNLB3AKTTWFWCSIE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887850},"content":"Honor’s like, “I’m sure you’ll make sure to mention that in your Instagram post.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"TQLVX6HMCBGIDGTTDUDOVZJFL4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887851},"content":"“Also,” Sorcha goes, producing a pen, “we’re going to write it using a soy-based ink, which has a far less hormful environmental impact than petroleum-based inks.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QWDPSDCPKZAW3E4BRJZJNYD5NI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887852},"content":"“People are just going to think you’re a knob,” Honor goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"XCT66VHFWNC3DCH4HGAW6BHREE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887853},"content":"Sorcha just ignores her. She takes a page from the box and goes, “Okay, we’ll stort with the address. Obviously, it’s different from last year. We won’t go into details about the fire. We’ll just say that we’re living with Grandma and Grandpa Lalor for now. Okay, here we go. I’ll put ‘Dear Santa’. Then I’ll stort off by saying that we hope he and Mrs Claus are keeping well, despite the fact that the North Pole is, like, 20 degrees warmer than it was a century ago. And I’ll say that you’ve been very, very good boys this year.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"YCXYVAIIANFXXG3JYQ7X4MFC44","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887854},"content":"I’m there, “Again, we won’t mention the fire.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"J2KWZYKWZFCZPMDUS2ETZISTDU","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887855},"content":"She goes, “Right, what we do want for Christmas – as in, what do we, like, <i>really</i> want?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PSTGHOL74VDNXAKQGDOT2T7AIY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887856},"content":"I’m there, “Johnny mentioned a bike.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"4C37SUOE4FBW5BQML7ZHPPYJR4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887857},"content":"“A focking bike,” Johnny goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"SBDX6W76PNE5DHAQHJG6LCZB7E","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887858},"content":"I’m like, “A <i>focking</i> bike. I stand corrected.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6SO6FH3XU5ETPDF62V4G2FZYBU","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887859},"content":"Sorcha goes, “Why don’t we – just for one year – ask for gifts that are slightly more, I don’t know, <i>ethereal</i>?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"ZCPLLGR7FJEU7LSTISYA4EKNFA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887860},"content":"The three boys look at me for an explanation.","type":"text"},{"_id":"6EWSMX336NAJLNX3VPUTKDC7TY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887861},"content":"I’m there, “I haven’t a clue, goys. I was on the senior cup team, bear in mind?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UVAWMDGF3JFWZHPTQ55SJXDT54","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887862},"content":"Honor goes, “It means things that don’t cost any money.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"OPGT7JHWE5DH5LEN5XWXQFPPAY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887863},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “It means spiritual things.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"BVL6JHDBHVGSZMUJ7F5SOG6XCY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887864},"content":"“Oh my God,” Honor goes, “this is totally for Instagram. People will say that your children are going to grow up to hate you.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"YNWVANDE6NAXTDACIDPQQFVLJQ","additional_properties":{"_id":"IEH52E4JYRBNLG7KZVQ5CSEYQI"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"VTHGUIFPLJCTZI473AJ5MG4D3U","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887865},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “Why don’t we ask for – just as an example – peace on Earth.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"I3XVS5NWHFCW3O2CWCSE6FEYE4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887866},"content":"I’m like, “Is that not–?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"JB7NMP4XNBE6PNNH6WI3HARGRU","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887867},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “What?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"N6VTZYWV7BCFHM63RZV6TZESKE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887868},"content":"“Well, God’s deportment?” I go. “I mean, Santa is just a dude who runs a workshop where he makes <i>toys</i> all year round?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UYTK6OVPSZHKJNIKFVRGQTQKEI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887869},"content":"“I’m putting down peace on Earth,” Sorcha goes, then she writes the words. “Okay, what else? What about climate justice?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UYABWATWWBH55FKGKSXEP34HFQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887870},"content":"“The fock is that?” Leo goes – and he’s well within his rights.","type":"text"},{"_id":"4QVFKMZNRBCWPHPVEEJ232YSQE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887871},"content":"I’m there, “Again, Sorcha, I’m wondering is climate justice maybe a bit above<i> </i>Santa’s pay grade?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PRFTH4X56RGILDKNREC45KOAGY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887872},"content":"She’s there, “I’m going to ask him for a stabilisation in our emission of greenhouse gases in the short term to at least put off the global catastrophe that’s coming our way. And also more windmills and solar panels for the world. Okay, what else?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"BNSRGNPPFNDCXM6G3VQXLORXL4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887873},"content":"“A mini Ferrrari,” Brian goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"H6CJ6ZUA4ZEVBG5A6MJ3PHAWXE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887874},"content":"And Sorcha’s like, “Again, Brian, we’re trying to think of less <i>tangible</i> things?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"H35MRV3MARFGFBBA7EPCOF4XS4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887875},"content":"He looks at me.","type":"text"},{"_id":"Z7FG776LIBAQRFXXQ35MXHUROE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887876},"content":"I’m there, “Jesus Christ, Brian, you’d a bigger vocabulary than me when you were five.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PAB7UY7IJFH3PMEO7QIETC46W4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887877},"content":"“Come on, what else?” Sorcha goes. “What if we just ask Santa to keep us all safe and healthy during the coming year?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"FJG6PZBU5RCW3EI2AIG45TNAKA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887878},"content":"I’m there, “Again, I see Santa as the boss of a humungous Amazon-type warehouse in the snowy wilds of wherever. I think we’re asking a bit much from him. He might think we’re ripping the piss.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"GPRTL67GXJEDNJSZSB7P5IT3CM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887879},"content":"But Sorcha goes, “Ross, he and Mrs Claus live on a sheet of ice that has thinned by almost 50 per cent in the last 50 years. Actually, I’ll mention that in the letter. Then I’ll sign off by saying that this is your wish for Christmas and you don’t want any material gifts this year.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"TC5KHUQPEFCF7E3JLN7GSD23HY","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887880},"content":"Johnny’s like, “What the fock?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"LYA653YEZRH3FDANNN6NH7PULE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887881},"content":"“This is going to be the shittest Christmas ever,” Honor goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"44OWHQJNHBBTHBMGMK7HLMOO4Y","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887882},"content":"I’m there, “It’s definitely shaping up that way.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"X2577G7KSRGYHGZ57ASQSLN4QM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887883},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “Lots of love, Honor, Brian, Johnny and Leo.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"57ZP5MEUBFAILGHVMHJOEL6FJA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887884},"content":"I’m like, “Sorcha, just to repeat what Johnny said, what the fock?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"AJ5SGVMC4FEEXNMXB7KWK7KYZA","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887885},"content":"She goes, “Right, I’m going to go and make some more hot chocolate,” and she takes the letter and heads for the kitchen.","type":"text"},{"_id":"PIHG4YAL2BAD3LRRNXJ3OL7HMQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887886},"content":"Leo’s like, “Are we getting no presents from Santa?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"XLXCCRE5SZFALCDEZ6WHDPAXTU","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887887},"content":"Honor’s there, “Don’t worry – it’s just our mother looking for likes from strangers again.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"IYLZI6ZBPZDVBAOYVBFV4OEXJM","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887888},"content":"I go, “Has she posted it yet?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"5XVDULP5OVANXB27XGY4K7T6D4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887889},"content":"Honor checks her phone.","type":"text"},{"_id":"BB5T7VMN7BES5NTU5V2EY7FTWI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887890},"content":"She’s there, “Yeah – 30 seconds ago.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"GYQ37XNOH5AJTMHIC6RXBB2RVE","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887891},"content":"I’m like, “Any responses yet?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"VUZTIUMOHJAMZB7AQBWKRPSIMI","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887892},"content":"“One,” Honor goes. “Someone called her a knob. Oh, and someone else just said that her kids would grow up to hate her.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"H6GGYSSZS5A5FKXHBOB623DLCQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1732538887893},"content":"“Right,” I go, “let’s write your real list before she comes back. Who said they wanted an electric guitor?”","type":"text"}],"content_restrictions":{"content_code":"premium"},"credits":{"by":[{"additional_properties":{"original":{"byline":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}},"name":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}]},"description":{"basic":"Honor goes, ‘Don’t worry – it’s just our mother looking for likes from strangers again’"},"display_date":"2024-11-30T05:00:00Z","headlines":{"basic":"‘Sorcha, I’m wondering is climate justice maybe a bit above Santa’s pay grade?’","native":""},"label":{},"promo_items":{"basic":{"_id":"2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU","auth":{"1":"ce9515e92d72b629eb2d343932922ce35f6d8861795c81404197f0ffd8bdf691"},"focal_point":{"x":1302,"y":975},"url":"https://cloudfront-eu-central-1.images.arcpublishing.com/irishtimes/2YYZ6XOJMJBTNNT5U2IPQBC6BU.jpg"},"podcast":{"embed":{"config":{"duration":382.684,"episodeTitle":"Honor goes, ‘Don’t worry – it’s just our mother looking for likes from strangers again’","imageUrl":"https://assets.pippa.io/shows/61409402444fd951a7f27e60/1673383397461-8f5dc76da6409974bd352dc3e7b7a299.jpeg","showTitle":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly","streamUrl":"https://feeds.acast.com/public/streams/61409402444fd951a7f27e60/episodes/6749fae61c6967d8146dc23f.mp3"}}}},"subtype":"podcast","taxonomy":{"sections":[{"name":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"},{"name":"People"},{"name":"Life & Style"},{"name":"Podcasts"}]},"type":"story","website_url":"/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-im-wondering-is-climate-justice-maybe-a-bit-above-santas-pay-grade/","websites":{"irishtimes":{"website_section":{"_id":"/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly","additional_properties":{"original":{"Podcast":{"podcast_logo":"https://cloudfront-eu-central-1.images.arcpublishing.com/irishtimes/MH35IEIN5FGYNH7X3SQF3E4LBQ.jpg"}}},"name":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}}}},{"_id":"JZZIM4DFA5DLLEDGGVEAYKYMSQ","additional_properties":{},"canonical_url":"/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/sorcha-goes-i-make-no-apologies-for-saying-it-honor-you-are-a-danger-to-democracy/","content_elements":[{"_id":"V74LYAD5I5GGHFP5XNDUMKSMTM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772943},"content":"Honor is in an absolute fouler when she gets into the cor.","type":"text"},{"_id":"YW3KQAFMEJHGJDEIMLP6JNU4BQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772944},"content":"I’m there, “Tough day at school?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"N7IR7Y2QW5FOHKVVO7NIGFYO3I","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772945},"content":"“The fock is this?” she goes, waving a sheaf of glossy pages at me and her old dear.","type":"text"},{"_id":"FI72YJTCLJFCTIRZILKKEDNBQA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772946},"content":"And Sorcha – sitting behind the wheel – goes, “It’s a copy of the student magazine, isn’t it? The Mount Anville Gazette?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PD3XUOUJEJE4VBSQSAFXFYU5VI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772947},"content":"“Exactly,” Honor goes. “And there’s an editorial in it calling me a fascist.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"RMV5SZFKANGYJDXKJLOPD2XVRQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772948},"content":"I’m there, “A fascist? Jesus! Here, what do they do again?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"JTQLNTQTYZFRHDGZYPC3OTLOAA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772949},"content":"“It means an authoritarian,” Sorcha goes. “Someone who’s dictatorial. Autocratic. It means she believes in the suppression of dissent.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"YZJVDLYGGFDBFMURFG6ABWBZOE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772950},"content":"Honor’s there, “Er, does that <i>sound</i> like me?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6G3MROTL2BDDXB4XLZ6GRUFAYM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772951},"content":"Sorcha doesn’t give her a straight answer. She just goes, “You’ve definitely chosen to be a different <i>kind</i> of Head Girl?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7IBWLYQ7VVFM7IJZO3UDZKCMEM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772952},"content":"Honor’s there, “Are you saying you’re on Thia Hall’s side?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"KTDZBTNJTNEXTI6EPNWRGGPOKU","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772953},"content":"“I’m saying that you’ve spent the last three months dismantling decades-old institutions – like the Student Council.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6TH4YOPF5NHRTNF3KYL4ASW5UU","additional_properties":{"_id":"RVJX6DU5GRHAXJSXD6RED64MDA"},"content":"‘When they see the copper, the triplets think it’s about them gobbing on the cauliflower and turmeric latte crowd - which I’m not even sure is a crime’","type":"interstitial_link"},{"_id":"YTSG4GE2XVG3LEYD4Y22SEOMMY","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772954},"content":"“As Head Girl, it’s <i>my</i> job to be the voice of the students of the school? We don’t need some bunch of dweebs claiming they have the right to speak for everyone.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6FZ7XEH4IZEMJE6FAMFRCBKXDM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772955},"content":"“And I’m making the point that, to some people, that kind of attitude might come across as fascistic. It might appear to some that you’re attempting to subvert democracy.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"JEY246Y2DVDJTHJ72IP5LUSJEU","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772956},"content":"Honor’s like, “Excuse me?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"IKCHXYKZVBETJOLAYUXQA27KCI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772957},"content":"“And also attempting to close down free speech,” Sorcha goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"RIPVP2RFNJHYPLJL527B36P2CA","additional_properties":{"_id":"5SLDYCD5V5BAXOHK33SRLUW5RE"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"XKF4LDBTNNFL7AYT2Q3PHYBLKA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772958},"content":"I’m there, “How is that magazine still going, Honor? I thought the old man and Hennessy were going to use their influence to get all the advertisers to pull their money.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"FLU4MCIW2NCBBEDRBXXIFAFVVU","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772959},"content":"“That’s a very good point,” Honor goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"CRZGPNCKTJBBNA4TTAZMLIGKJA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772960},"content":"I’m there, “Is it?” delighted with myself. “Fair focks to me so.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7MVQEJSH4NACPDCCT4PPCS6NCA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772961},"content":"“As in, like, who’s funding Thia?” she goes. “There are literally no ads in this magazine any more. So, like, who’s actually paying to have it printed?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"IDHXDM7UQFAKLED7YEILGPPWJU","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772962},"content":"Sorcha goes, “Can we maybe change the subject? Honor, you haven’t told us what you want for Christmas yet.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"T2M2TRNOMJFN5EWDSOF7WLEC24","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772963},"content":"Honor’s there, “Someone is backing her financially – and I’m going to make it my business to find out who it is.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"E2ILVB6GTRD57ATIPGYSRHSWQA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772964},"content":"“Even though I can’t believe we’re talking about Christmas already,” Sorcha goes. “Seems like no time ago that we were in Quinta do Lago. Mind you, it was midterm – so it <i>was</i> no time ago?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"I3I5E2ZU5VGMZEGT7JC6EBDS5U","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772965},"content":"I’m like, “How are you going to find out who’s bankrolling the girl, Honor?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QD64OHXILNF2JMD5ZNVVIHPCUM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772966},"content":"And Honor’s there, “I’m going to ask Hennessy to find out. There’s this, like, private <i>investigator</i> he uses?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UDV5IKOSJBBNDD3FB4GBBSKMOE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772967},"content":"I’m like, “You’re not talking about Flatfoot Frankie, are you?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"NCZSIIVV2RBMTLT5DCVXYZCIOI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772968},"content":"She goes, “Frankie – that’s his name.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3HQLZAF7F5CSJKTNTPI763L274","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772969},"content":"I’m there, “I can’t believe old Flatfoot is still knocking about. I did port of my transition year work experience with him. He used to get me to name random people and then he’d have their bank account details within, like, half an hour. That’s how I found out that Fionn’s granny left him half-a-million snots in her will. This was back in the day when half-a-million was considered a lot of money.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"ERBMOB3YPRA6DNOZ23K32T3PIY","additional_properties":{"_id":"FWXIGZFW7ZFS3MJY62BNODIZTM"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"HPYRG6S3YNFW5MV7WTEKPCIVT4","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772970},"content":"That’s when Sorcha suddenly loses it.","type":"text"},{"_id":"PZEVJMCYP5DX7MMDQ4T3HI7SFY","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772971},"content":"She goes, “Oh my God, <i>why</i> are we still talking about this? I’m trying to talk about Christmas here!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"NEIKSAZP2JHC3HA5HFJFMTX5QE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772972},"content":"I give her a long, sideways look and she’s, like, red in the face.","type":"text"},{"_id":"W4NQQXPMKFAS7IANYQXTQDOKXI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772973},"content":"“Oh! My God!” Honor goes. “It’s you!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3DOQMWZOMBFJRAHFOFUD3M4ZVY","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772974},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “Me? What’s me? Oh my God, what are you talking about?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"NZSSL5ZIWFDABB6KBF7JUS4S6M","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772975},"content":"Honor goes, “You’re the one who’s bankrolling the magazine! Go on – deny it!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"V6EZ33TUL5EIHLEKV5OMBCNGQI","additional_properties":{"_id":"M66ACM26TBC7VEBOCU5BH764DQ"},"content":"‘We’ve no idea what caused the fire. And we’re sticking to that story’","type":"interstitial_link"},{"_id":"IW3QDPTZRVATJE2BZN56XVZGAI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772976},"content":"Except Sorcha <i>doesn’t </i>deny it?","type":"text"},{"_id":"C5HSKHTSBFH7NCKGSTYOFXVXME","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772977},"content":"She goes, “I happen to think that a free press is the lifeblood of a healthy body politic.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"XJPVVPUN65CGTMVQ4B7KSR22HM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772978},"content":"I’m there, “Jesus, Sorcha – what kind of talk is that?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"KUBJBKTKJNGRBLG46CVX2JW6MI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772979},"content":"She’s like, “I set up the Mount Anville Gazette for that very reason. And I’m proud to say that it was one of my legacy projects. Because power needs eyes on it at all times.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3N47553ENVALRN3QH2NI4XI22U","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772980},"content":"Honor’s like, “Oh! My! God!” and she storts turning the pages of the magazine madly. “Oh! My focking–”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QJO52OTQCREDXDET4YGNKORUJI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772981},"content":"I’m there, “How much is this actually costing us in terms of shekels, Sorcha?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"4PROFJKQMVC65N4RHV7NK4Z7EE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772982},"content":"Honor goes, “<i>Honor O’Carroll-Kelly’s efforts to close down The MAG are an attempt to subvert democracy and close down free speech</i>,” and she’s, like, reading from it, we’re talking word for word. “<i>A free press is the lifeblood of a health body politic.</i> Oh my God, Thia didn’t write this! You wrote it!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QK7VS3FIBVHZNKXCMDMMNN5VVE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772983},"content":"Sorcha doesn’t even <i>try</i> to deny it? I would. I’m terrified of Honor.","type":"text"},{"_id":"7UJRKO3EABHDNKHMMHB4V6V4BA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772984},"content":"Sorcha goes, “Thia asked me – as a former Head Girl myself – to write a guest editorial on the age of authoritarianism.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"CTKZ5MABYRAJPC3YUE3M6OCXLA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772985},"content":"Honor’s there, “What, without putting your name to it?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"W5NBD4OL2NAUJA2WWFBYJOLS2I","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772986},"content":"“Yes, such is the climate of fear that <i>you’ve </i>brought about,” Sorcha goes.","type":"text"},{"_id":"NG3SBVCZM5HUZLGEN6GAC3HA5I","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772987},"content":"I’m there, “I can’t believe you’ve gone against your own daughter, Sorcha,” loving not being the bad goy for once in my life.","type":"text"},{"_id":"XS3WT7ITSRE2TC43AZODCVEV6Y","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772988},"content":"Honor’s like, “You compared me to Donald Trump.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7GT6MDZ6S5DBXOODT7FZJJNRIA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772989},"content":"“I said that a lot of your behaviour – yes – comes across as quite Trumpian,” Sorcha goes. “Refusing to accept the outcome of democratic votes when they don’t go your way. Using the sixth-year ski trip to line your own pockets. Treating anyone who questions the way you use your power as an enemy to be destroyed.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"CWJ7OGABOJCGFIB6CO66M4M6I4","additional_properties":{"_id":1732111184228},"content":"I’m there, “You’re bang out of order, Sorcha – in fairness.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"DU3CIEQDBZGR5DGYL2AVUK7LFI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772991},"content":"Honor goes, “Stop the cor!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"P7PCV5BY7ZEKFKNL24O354H7JM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772992},"content":"Except Sorcha doesn’t. She goes, “I am not stopping the cor. We’re on the Stillorgan Dual Carriageway.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"XTBU6EBULBG4LB4IPFE4G2LEYI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772993},"content":"But Honor throws open the back door while we’re still moving and suddenly the thing is flapping around back there like a fish’s gill.","type":"text"},{"_id":"FXAYV2ZOLBDQFC5SSDDEQAWDRM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772994},"content":"“Stop the focking cor!” she screams.","type":"text"},{"_id":"DYCJFJWERRFOXN23H2TOULNMNU","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772995},"content":"Which Sorcha then has no choice <i>but</i> to do?","type":"text"},{"_id":"KV6KNYSIGVHHRIFNUEEN52ICIQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772996},"content":"Sorcha’s like, “What are you going to do? Get the bus the rest of the way?” and she’s really putting it up to her.","type":"text"},{"_id":"A4HFIMMRAFG6VNXPVO5LDKNOGE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772997},"content":"“No,” Honor goes, “I’m going to get an Uber.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"FL2VSB6HKZANXHAJYANKL7YNQI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772998},"content":"Sorcha’s there, “I make no apologies for saying it, Honor, that you are a danger to democracy. Watch the road there as you’re getting out.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"YCVH4EHDPJFG3HVXF3EWDVCFU4","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925772999},"content":"But Honor goes, “You’ve made an enemy of me now. Bad move ... <i>Mom</i>!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3ASQ3OVYA5BNBMADOCCPCZWTEI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925773000},"content":"Honor gets out and slams the door shut.","type":"text"},{"_id":"6YDBOKXUXBE2FIXXQUFDVYYQMY","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925773001},"content":"Sorcha’s like, “What’s she going to do to me? Seriously, what can she do?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"IQF7OG3G2VEEJMYQZZIORYIIVE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731925773002},"content":"But she sounds genuinely scared. And from bitter experience, I would say there’s every reason she <i>should</i> be?","type":"text"}],"content_restrictions":{"content_code":"premium"},"credits":{"by":[{"additional_properties":{"original":{"byline":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}},"name":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}]},"description":{"basic":"Honor’s like, ‘You compared me to Donald Trump’"},"display_date":"2024-11-23T05:00:00Z","headlines":{"basic":"Sorcha goes, ‘I make no apologies for saying it, Honor. 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Barney does this all the toyum.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"ISXNG7AUD5DNHAAU4NSCEQCEIE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387643},"content":"Borney being his mate in the Gords who I’m paying five hundred yoyos to – yeah, no – scare my children straight.","type":"text"},{"_id":"IVZAPHWMMFBO5AL4HCCWC2INKY","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387644},"content":"I’m there, “I’m just wondering is it a bit –”","type":"text"},{"_id":"MTPFCTTCDBAV7F6JOEWBYMYZKU","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387645},"content":"He goes, “A bit what?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"4BSMZGUFHFBQVIVCHNIRTONS34","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387646},"content":"“A bit <i>extreme</i>?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"ONLLGIIETNFRZKQZ3KH2LZU45M","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387647},"content":"“<a href=\"https://www.irishtimes.com/podcasts/ross-ocarroll-kelly/weve-no-idea-what-caused-the-fire-and-were-sticking-to-that-story/\" target=\"_blank\">Rosser, thee burdened down yisser house</a>.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"RHLG3G7FBNGHXNXZ7CSWQIM4EQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387648},"content":"“They didn’t burn it down. Only their bedroom was actually destroyed. The rest was, like, <i>water</i> damage?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"SOPCO2IGXFC5ZIDXX5LR4O27OE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387649},"content":"“And look where you’ve ended up libbon.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"B27255DCGNAJVDX6RIHDOYUWZQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387650},"content":"Yeah, no, Stoney-focking-basher. In Sorcha’s old pair’s aportment. Until the place has been fixed up, which they’re saying could be, like, Morch of next year.","type":"text"},{"_id":"24EQ7GJYRBFKRDMDCMD32I4WCM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387651},"content":"Sorcha’s old man walks into the kitchen then and – totally out of left field – goes, “We flush the toilet in this home.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QYWLUUTNN5HFVHPRZADXT326NM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387652},"content":"I’m there, “Excuse me?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"77PHAEFVWNE3PLFF5KFMKOH534","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387653},"content":"He doesn’t even acknowledge Ronan’s <i>presence</i>, by the way?","type":"text"},{"_id":"VPOXWYNFAZER5MWTCL6LXRH4KA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387654},"content":"He goes, “I’m sure you’re used to my daughter doing everything for you. But while you’re living under my roof, you will learn to flush the toilet yourself.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"DV6N6ON5KZANNATRUBBZ7AHUKQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387655},"content":"I’m there, “<i>Your</i> roof. You don’t have a roof. Your roof is somebody else’s floor.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"BLML2EXJLFCPJABJISCVMTLURQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387656},"content":"“Do you think you’d be here if it wasn’t for Sorcha? I’d happily see you out on the street – you and those children of yours.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6EUQP7TI3VE2JCM2OZNIPUHL3Q","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387657},"content":"Yeah, no, that’s how he talks about his own grandkids.","type":"text"},{"_id":"N5HHT6G6QFBSLAI6U7NSGCEMH4","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387658},"content":"I’m there, “I’m not sure I can put up with five months of this.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"M5YV4REH2VHHNOCEXPDUHTTCOY","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387659},"content":"He goes, “I’m sure you could find somewhere else to live – if you really put your mind to it.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"YS4YUCBWCRAX5IIC4R7WIERNH4","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387660},"content":"I suddenly hear this loud, smashing sound coming from outside.","type":"text"},{"_id":"VOTFRQT7XVEWRPS76E45TJI67M","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387661},"content":"“The fock was that?” I go.","type":"text"},{"_id":"GMGGPWBMFFBZXF7CSKPR5Q6Y7M","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387662},"content":"The dude is like, “Your children are dropping Sorcha’s mother’s plant pots off the balcony. Do you want me to deal with that as well as flushing the toilet – and wiping the seat for you?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"AQCHO4PQYRFJZER2MZUPACEBYI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387663},"content":"Yeah, no, my aim wouldn’t be great – which is random, I know, coming from a kicker.","type":"text"},{"_id":"AFZPE7UUUBBP3HUBKIDQ6QP6DQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387664},"content":"The dude focks off then and I turn around to Ronan and go, “Okay, let’s do it.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"KUP3MN5QJZBQFL4XBOS4RASC2U","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387665},"content":"He’s there, “Are you shewer?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UJWT4CA2L5GTXDSN7XKH5BQ5CI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387666},"content":"“Ro,” I go, “they’re out of control. I could have died in that fire.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"5PX6K35AX5ALHAZYA4ORDE33MA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387667},"content":"So Ronan whips out his phone and rings his mate, Borney. Half an hour later, the buzzer goes and I let the dude in. He’s a smiley dude but he’s built like a focking Portaloo.","type":"text"},{"_id":"PFONYUYYA5BXXNZUPZRVZCFKPE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387668},"content":"He’s like, “Brian, Johnny and Leo – is that the names?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"MSEWOWS2CVEQ3J7CEEWUXJU74U","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387669},"content":"I’m there, “Yeah, no, I’d big hopes at the stort.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"GMVT3RBBQZFMLMRHR5J2BD63AU","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387670},"content":"He goes, “Sure, lookish, we all need a steer at some point in our lives. Like this one here.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"C2IBZENKJZFLRFNABXI4Y43V4U","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387671},"content":"He nods at Ronan.","type":"text"},{"_id":"DPJYF6SNHVHHFENON5B2FUUDRQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387672},"content":"He’s like, “How many times did your mammy ask me to throw you in the cells?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UKO4W5QBHNG6NFTP2GMA2EMP5Q","additional_properties":{"_id":"LOAKGFBZ6FGSXD54YCICHORWQE"},"type":"image"},{"_id":"DWAEOLTNOBBFTIHVHKRXNGJKMA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387673},"content":"“It was more than a few,” Ronan goes, laughing at the memory.","type":"text"},{"_id":"TQX3JIDWC5D6RKYQH7BMKP4OHM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387674},"content":"Borney’s there, “Go and get them,” which is what I end <i>up</i> doing?","type":"text"},{"_id":"ML3SPKENT5CFVGZDMMBNGVONDY","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387675},"content":"The triplets are now spitting over the balcony onto the heads of the – in fairness – mostly hipsters below.","type":"text"},{"_id":"NA2WIGKLBRH43EM7GAMOBRKOU4","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387676},"content":"I’m like, “Goys, there’s someone here who wants to talk to you,” and they follow me inside. When they see the copper standing there, the three of them turn white. They obviously think it’s about them gobbing on the foraged cauliflower and turmeric latte crowd, which I’m not even sure is a crime.","type":"text"},{"_id":"XO2L4LU4EVG7XOKFS2HC26BMQM","additional_properties":{"_id":"GEQUMVXBXFB3HCVFOLCS6QEWJI"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"XBETB74SGBHAJCGGQZ5DUDKJHE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387677},"content":"Borney gets straight into character.","type":"text"},{"_id":"XY6TKZ6RARBNLHESVDC565XPIM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387678},"content":"He goes, “I’m arresting you for causing criminal damage to a house in Killiney. You do not have to say anything, but anything you do say may be used in evidence against you.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"LE4BBWHEM5CPZIWDDIAFI4YVCQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387679},"content":"The three of them are in, like, genuine shock, but they go quietly, walking out the door ahead of Borney, who gives us a big wink and goes, “I’ll have them back to you in a few hours.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"44ODWEU3XNGJVOZN6OUU2BUVGY","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387680},"content":"Ronan can tell that I’m worried. He goes, “Thee’ll be mustard, Rosser. He’ll thrun them in a Peter for a couple of hours and you won’t know yisser selves, the diffordence in them.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"Y6KVZGM4RZH5THFEVVFGQKZKJM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387681},"content":"I’m there, “Yeah, no, you’re right. It has to be done.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"WH3CSUQD7NHAJNWTV6RVCNWC5Y","additional_properties":{"_id":"QNRIOUMLAJDTXPFLFF6AQWD2VQ"},"content":"Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: ‘I wonder sometimes are these kids definitely mine’","type":"interstitial_link"},{"_id":"WWVQHPBOHRHTLNCNXVYCY7BC3E","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387682},"content":"“Rosser, the last time Barney locked me up, I was 10 years old and me ma found a map of the Bank of Ireland on the Ballygall Road under me bed. I got it off Showtime Sal and Johnny the Rat. Ten hours I was locked up. I nearly went off me nut. Barney says to me, ‘Could you do ten years of that?’ Let’s just say me career plans changed overnight.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"JRWQ753E5NEJ3OSZZH4DLF6J7Q","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387683},"content":"It’s shortly afterwards that Ronan’s phone ends up ringing. He answers and goes, “Barney, calm dowun. Take a brett. Where are you?” and then he hangs up and goes, “Mon, Rosser.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7RW4OT4OQJH7FNLHRJOEO5ZMY4","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387684},"content":"I’m like, “What the fock is going on?” as I’m chasing Ronan down the stairs, across the forecourt and then out onto the street. We haven’t gone far before I get my answer.","type":"text"},{"_id":"YYMFAKBCNJGADHU537UD5BCRG4","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387685},"content":"There’s, like, a Gorda cor and it’s, like, bent around a lamppost and people are standing around, eating their fermented acorn waffles and drinking green juices out of mason jors, looking shocked.","type":"text"},{"_id":"M5725OM25BDJBH7ZZ2KVB5LXO4","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387686},"content":"Me and Ro race to the front of the cor. Borney is sitting in the driver’s seat. The airbag has gone off in his face.","type":"text"},{"_id":"S53G4LEE2NDZZO2F7LD5QIQZLE","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387687},"content":"Ronan’s like, “What happened, Barney?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UJ5BP7QGSBHFJNHK7XUV3HD24E","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387688},"content":"“The one with the glasses,” he goes, meaning obviously Leo, “made a grab for me handcuffs.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"AI5JEIH3WRDVHJDKL74URKF6AQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387689},"content":"I notice that – yeah, no – the dude’s left wrist is cuffed to the steering wheel.","type":"text"},{"_id":"CQYT5RIJ2VGTFNCLNWFXVFLXWI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387690},"content":"The back door is open and there’s, like, no sign of Brian, Johnny and Leo.","type":"text"},{"_id":"TIJNULQ275CT3IUGY4CYEEAS3U","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387691},"content":"I’m like, “Dude, where are my children?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PZRIIMOCM5B4VNRZLJH2DJSLNQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387692},"content":"“Over there,” he goes, nodding in the direction of three boys, who are holding up the traffic by fighting in the middle of the road. Brian is wearing a Gorda hat – presumably Borney’s – and Johnny is trying to hit him over the head with an extendable truncheon, while Leo is screaming obscenities about the Gordai into Borney’s walkie-talkie.","type":"text"},{"_id":"QMAG6NRAAZFDVCT2737B6Y2KOM","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387693},"content":"“I’ve seen some mad kids in my time,” the poor dude goes, “but I’ve never seen anything like them.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"REWQB5Q7K5AGZEI5NISXWEG3WA","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387694},"content":"I’m there, “Can you maybe call for back-up? Get them to send another car?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"GBOOYPT7TBCYTJLD6VSR232WYQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387695},"content":"Ronan goes, “The fook do you think this is, Rosser, Uber?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"VP325Q45D5BQ5DRCHMULPYWRXI","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387696},"content":"Borney’s like, “I could lose my job for this.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"DZAKQ23XPBHSNK3IIW3HA3MHPQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1731326387697},"content":"And I’m there, “Right, well, thanks for trying, Borney. Okay, Brian, give the nice man back his pepper spray.”","type":"text"}],"content_restrictions":{"content_code":"premium"},"credits":{"by":[{"additional_properties":{"original":{"byline":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}},"name":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}]},"description":{"basic":"There’s a Gorda cor bent around a lamppost and people are standing around looking shocked. 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I’m up to 21 of however many there are – 26, 27?","type":"text"},{"_id":"GQX72E2J4VDPLAC4JEDUFLIXIY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579014},"content":"I’m there, “Why are you giving me a heads-up, by the way?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PQEX6QNA4JCRRKNFGT7B76SZI4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579015},"content":"She goes, “Just in case something happened while I was away that you don’t want me to know about and you have to hide the evidence.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3FC7BMNPRFHH3L2RLX7A5TZILI","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579016},"content":"I laugh. 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The house is on fire! Get out!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"VBPO4IM255AXNM4CBCS75LD42I","additional_properties":{"_id":"GXOCFMCSMVFFRKGJGDUAUXKQIQ"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"XESU2ZVVHBGPXLD2APH5TUHSJI","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579021},"content":"That’s when I hear a voice – Honor’s voice – go, “We’re fine, Dad!” and I realise that it’s coming from outside.","type":"text"},{"_id":"V2VGFZF7SRACVJBC553NMID3DE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579022},"content":"I tip downstairs and head out to the front gorden. The four of them are standing there in their pyjamas.","type":"text"},{"_id":"FDRR74NZTRCXNKS4Y5SEZCUL24","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579023},"content":"I’m there, “Er, you wouldn’t have thought of telling me, no?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"ZTR7T5AIGREGVOFQJ7UWTNGLXA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579024},"content":"Honor goes, “I shouted your name and you didn’t answer.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"RECZ7T4DSBFR3MTF7ZEQLIA3PE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579025},"content":"“I was having a nap. I was doing some of my famous inside-my-head thinking and my brain, as usual, shorted out.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"E3PYY37DKZEWPBWFSNMHLG2ZDQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579026},"content":"“We just presumed you went to Finnegan’s for a sneaky pint like you did every night while Mom was away.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"HJ4LWZTGARFPPJUIRWILSMMR7Y","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579027},"content":"“Maybe don’t tell her that.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3H4KZUTH6FHVLNZEGW4LUCSX74","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579028},"content":"“Anyway,” she goes, “the fire brigade is on its way.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6YFZV42ZBVHHFETQ6SCVAERUZ4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579029},"content":"I’m there, “What happened?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"R3OWBF7PXZDUNPKKUVTKWJXBTQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579030},"content":"“Leo let off a firework.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"HR65LDKFKZDYRIFPEVBLBGO7II","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579031},"content":"I turn around to him and I’m like, “Where the fock did you get fireworks?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7LW35HU2GVBERL4FVMS7OSKXOI","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579032},"content":"He goes, “I bought them. Off a boy.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"S2HIVDURTBB25OHFKXRX5HUGEA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579033},"content":"“What boy?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"JXKODAU2VBGELBOCPEBFZIHCLM","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579034},"content":"“A boy in school. I told you and you said you didn’t care.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"A4KUDRAJLFD25GHCDNIN2PISYE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579035},"content":"“Well, it’s possible I wasn’t listening. But why the fock did you let it off in the house?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3XJWPTO3CZCSJJ27DYC7UQ5COY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579036},"content":"He shrugs his little shoulders.","type":"text"},{"_id":"XLKZZC7WWVH6VP3EFUH6EFGHH4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579037},"content":"I’m there, “Are you stupid?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3KVSQAQHLVFBTL5764QKP43KG4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579038},"content":"He is stupid. He takes after me.","type":"text"},{"_id":"4UMTZI3O75CXVOC6VWWJDDUELM","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579039},"content":"Sorcha’s cor pulls into the driveway. She gets out, giving it, “Oh my God! My babies! Thank God you’re safe!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UGQYNTVUDFE7JPH4BURQAEVHPY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579040},"content":"Out of the corner of my mouth, I go, “Don’t tell her about the fireworks, okay? There’ll be focking war.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UOU2RYNPTNFGVMAAWVNUOZIYNA","additional_properties":{"_id":"G2UXCBL7QBHPDARTUEM6FG32RQ"},"content":"‘People in the crowd are staring at Honor like she’s a cold sore on debs night’","type":"interstitial_link"},{"_id":"C5RAA76TRNE55NWGXMGFX7ET7Q","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579041},"content":"Sorcha storts hugging the four of them, going, “I don’t care what happens to the house as long as you kids are safe!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"V2SS7FQ7JBGGLKXSHMAA6NLZWY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579042},"content":"I’m there, “Would I have time to run in there and grab a few bits?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"ZXR7N2AT3VBV3PRWXINDOSDOTU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579043},"content":"She’s like, “Excuse me?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6KAU5X4UGFAMFCSIEFTRKKXGBA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579044},"content":"“I’m thinking in terms of my tactics book obviously. And the Caelan Doris jersey I bought at that auction ... ”","type":"text"},{"_id":"MIRFHUTW4ZEDBFAZ7LJJ64JVTU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579045},"content":"“You are not going back in the house.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7BRYIBD5QBGSPIUGXCQRNHSBZM","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579046},"content":"“But only a tiny bit of it is on actual fire.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"2MY6K2ZTUREAJL2SAWZBHKYHAM","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579047},"content":"“Fire spreads, Ross. By the way, do we even know how it storted?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"G6LGCLVMJBFCPJJS5XDK5QVTUQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579048},"content":"I’m like, “No, it’s a total mystery – isn’t it, goys?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UL2YDFBOK5CITBDYQX7JT5XF7I","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579049},"content":"The boys all nod.","type":"text"},{"_id":"RBJZZDWVSRER3IKNHPWK752VQ4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579050},"content":"“It’s their bedroom that’s on fire,” Sorcha goes. “Goys, was one of you playing with matches?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"LLCSPYQY55CZBIF2WJAAAQ52A4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579051},"content":"They’re all like, “No.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QQ2TJFFKRJHK5F65X6BEYRFFDM","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579052},"content":"I love their ability to lie without conscience. They get that from me as well.","type":"text"},{"_id":"UA7YSQCXMFEGLK6YCGRHZUSXOA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579053},"content":"Sorcha goes, “Ross, you didn’t let them have fireworks, did you?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"CLWPUKCE6JBJBGZHW3SD4LJ3MA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579054},"content":"I’m there, “Fireworks? What do you take me for?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"UHOKMUCGPNAQNFYNBWTHDF55EA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579055},"content":"She’s like, “My apologies, Ross.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"3NAL6KQWLRENZCVJ25QWCBQJME","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579056},"content":"Ten seconds later, a fire engine – lights flashing and sirens sounding – pulls up in the driveway. Six dudes get out. Four of them stort getting the hose ready, while one walks around the house to see how much of it is on fire and another tips over to talk to us.","type":"text"},{"_id":"OEZZLLYLCBEMHFLRWSL7L2CVUU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579057},"content":"He’s like, “Is everyone out of the house?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"HBK5RKLBWFCN5EXGSWT6LI2KUA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579058},"content":"He’s a looker. And Sorcha definitely notices.","type":"text"},{"_id":"G3DQ3ADCDJDITNURDJT6SMTDUY","additional_properties":{"_id":"WU427SSSKVBDVE6MCOELRBCKFE"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"7T44ZLZR5ZHLJJI3HS7B6NN75M","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579059},"content":"She’s there, “Yes – thank God, officer. I don’t care about the house as long as my precious, precious family are safe.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"WPMRCJT4AFDN3FSNS4Q3DZSGWQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579060},"content":"Her voice always gets about three postcodes posher when she’s flirting with someone.","type":"text"},{"_id":"AXAH3EEUNRHM5K27LGPGL4UUCE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579061},"content":"The dude who was checking out the house comes back and says the fire is contained to the bedroom. They should be able to put it out quite quickly but there will be a lot of water damage.","type":"text"},{"_id":"LDYCIYUMYJDLJPY7DXDMJE6TPI","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579062},"content":"I’m like, “Given that, could I quickly nip in and grab my Rugby Tactics Book?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"WYPQNJCWLZGCRNVSKVTBJZ32O4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579063},"content":"He’s there, “We can’t let you into the house, Sir, until the fire is out. It would be helpful to know what caused it.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PDTZUCJSE5CMNATJHZZTZAHIQ4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579064},"content":"“We were just mentioning that we’ve no idea,” I go. “And we’re sticking to that story.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7FVGJ32Q2VEANJPY7WUXMCCF7U","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579065},"content":"He goes, “Did someone let off a firework in the house?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"U4VPDOP6OJFY5JRH4O6BX66TXM","additional_properties":{"_id":"WR5VXWJCNFAHFAFLEEUIHBLF4A"},"content":"‘The thought of booking a table for one at Shanahan’s on the Green got me through my prison sentence’","type":"interstitial_link"},{"_id":"LUA7LXNMOZCZBJ3GABSGSEP3YY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579066},"content":"I’m like, “Now <i>you’re</i> saying fireworks. Why does everyone keep saying fireworks?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"4M7TNCN2MBEAJEI6NQVNDYEMOQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579067},"content":"“It’s just that around this time of year,” he goes, “a lot of house fires are caused by fireworks.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"XFCJUPVVMZEKPES64TY5G64IZU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579068},"content":"I’m like, “Take my word for it. There are no fireworks in the house.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"OCHDCHR6G5EUJM6DG75OJLH5LE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579069},"content":"No sooner have I got the words out than there is a loud, whizzing sound coming from inside the house, followed by a bang, then a series of pops, then a louder bang, then an even louder bang and within seconds the night sky over Killiney is lit up with a full-on fireworks display.","type":"text"},{"_id":"M7TLV26OQZGFPL7JCO4KMYFJ54","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579070},"content":"Leo goes, “I bought them from a boy in school. Dad said I could have them.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QQ4ISXHELFF57FOT75NRU5JAFY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579071},"content":"I’m like, “Excuse me for a moment.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"5VO6IRRTZFFA3C3IX3FPGJGX6I","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579072},"content":"I make sure to get out of earshot from them, then I ring Ronan.","type":"text"},{"_id":"COJ6GUYMUFDHFEOZ6EGIDWMQHQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579073},"content":"He answers. He goes, “How’s she cutting, Rosser?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"YTERZN5G3NAC5GCNHYC3DMJHP4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579074},"content":"I’m like, “Not great. The house is on fire.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"PJMRYLKULZFTLFXSZKGQXLLX74","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579075},"content":"“Insurdance job, is it?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"G2MBWZNMCRADJKQRRPELER4FUI","additional_properties":{"_id":1730721579076},"content":"“No, it’s not an insurance job. Ro, do you remember you said you’d a mate in the Gords who could scare my children straight by throwing them into the cells for an hour or two? Can you ring him for me?”","type":"text"}],"content_restrictions":{"content_code":"premium"},"credits":{"by":[{"additional_properties":{"original":{"byline":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}},"name":"Ross O'Carroll-Kelly"}]},"description":{"basic":"Sorcha is flirting with the fireman while the focking house is on fire, but there’ll be focking war if she finds out about the fireworks"},"display_date":"2024-11-09T05:00:00Z","headlines":{"basic":"‘We’ve no idea what caused the fire. 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Yeah, no, JP is running the Dublin City Marathon and I’ve turned up to cheer him on, as well as – obviously – the rest of the field.","type":"text"},{"_id":"CLWW75IQ2NDKBMWUQVGV37YJEE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972428},"content":"I’m shouting encouragement at everyone. I’m like, “You’re doing great! You’re smashing it out of the ballpork! You’re all winners, as far as I’m concerned!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"TX5O2MLCS5E6BFY5N5XOWPEZIU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972429},"content":"Honor – it shames me to say it – is also shouting at people. She’s going, “Are you out of your focking minds? Do you know how much damage you’re doing to your bodies? You know you’re all going to end up with orthritis and osteoporosis?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"BEX4J55KRZFRJALZUOJTBV3QPA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972430},"content":"The two- or three-hundred people who’ve also turned up to cheer on either loved ones or total strangers are giving <i>me</i> daggers – like <i>I’ve </i>any control over my daughter and the things she does.","type":"text"},{"_id":"T3LGPDVBMRG5BGEKIRIJZJD5EU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972431},"content":"I’m there, “Honor, maybe <i>stop</i> hurling abuse at the runners?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7VFASRNPN5GHRH7RKFVN2NTL4Q","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972432},"content":"But she goes, “I’m giving them sound medical advice, Dad. I don’t understand why anyone would put their body through that.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6XI7AWEXDFCCVAVC6BQBH7S3RE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972433},"content":"“Because it’s an achievement, Honor.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"IDWDQV7NYFGRLK7CKE7HNGLSWA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972434},"content":"“What, having the knees of a 90-year-old at the age of 37?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"K76I4LLCH5AWJITNP4WWP3QSKY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972435},"content":"“No, I mean being able to say that you finished a marathon. There’s only, like, a select group of us who can say that.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"6IW63KWWYBBIFL67PS3IFSJRVE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972436},"content":"She gets straight on to her phone, of course.","type":"text"},{"_id":"B7SVCTYDHVDM7G4LUBVKCYGOLU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972437},"content":"“One million people per year,” she goes. “That’s according to Google.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"2ESKK3DKGVBNDFYGWY7KUCPFHY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972438},"content":"I’m there, “Well, one million people per year then. That’s a pretty select group. And JP is going to hopefully be one of them.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"XKHUEWCEERFXPFFOTW3HIXYY5A","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972439},"content":"She goes, “Will I look up the number of people who are suffering with debilitating joint pain?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"SIHVFRQKJVATVP6QJMN44TSOPI","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972440},"content":"I’m like, “Er, no, Honor,” because a lot of people in the crowd are already staring at the girl like she’s a cold sore on debs night. Instead, I go back to shouting encouragement at the runners. I’m going, “Remember, pain is temporary – quitting is forever!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QOO2CLXAWBAF7FABERZBS2UQ4I","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972441},"content":"I look at my phone and I check where JP is on the tracker. He’s just turned off Roebuck Road on to Foster Avenue.","type":"text"},{"_id":"JJGJTS7G75EZZL4S3PCQTYZ7OM","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972442},"content":"“Pain is your body’s way of telling you to stop!” Honor is telling every bunch of runners that passes us. “Give up now! It’ll feel amazing!”","type":"text"},{"_id":"SX5JYXCUCVA2XFJDCPURD5KYCM","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972443},"content":"I turn around to her and I make the mistake of going, “You’re only saying that because you don’t know what it feels like to actually <i>achieve</i> something in sport?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"5BIAKICYQVEKDCSG2IE4GOICZI","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972444},"content":"She’s there, “Nor do you.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"OBUN6SGFFBBWVD4BXYIBXP2YEE","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972445},"content":"I’m like, “Er, I won a Leinster Schools Senior Cup, Honor. And I can tell you for a fact that they don’t give out a million of those every year. And I finished this marathon.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"ZXWOWCLH2NBYHJW2Q2KBFHEFAU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972446},"content":"She goes, “When was this anyway?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"FOFMGQX2YRDZTIR4BNVYBYIMZM","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972447},"content":"I’m there, “It was back in the day. There’s a photograph of me crossing the line on the bookcase in the livingroom.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"QPUSYU6YLNBEPAIZDJ7I5HFQVU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972448},"content":"“The one of you finishing just behind a man dressed as a toothbrush?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"VNDJ33F7IJAZXMXCSQF2KLEMQI","additional_properties":{"_id":"HHH3FKEIXRHDJJ5NKFP3ANPTBU"},"subtype":"pullquote","type":"quote"},{"_id":"GRFHQGNKRZFV5KSAFGGXAVTVZI","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972449},"content":"“Look, don’t get me wrong, Honor. I’m very proud of you and everything you’ve achieved in life. You won the election to become Head Girl of Mount Anville. And you’ve – how did you put it? – consolidated your power base by limiting the number of places available on the school ski trip then wait-listing anyone who didn’t make it to keep them in line. And – again, your words – you’ve suppressed dissent by closing down the school magazine. But I’ll always have my Leinster Schools Senior Cup winner’s medal – obviously, not literally, because they took it off me for doping – and I’ll always have my medal for finishing the Dublin City Marathon.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"E4ZXFMAOFZDHVHYKZP2BCC2C4M","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972450},"content":"She goes quiet then. It’s, like, a major burn for the girl. Then, suddenly out of left field, she goes, “I’m going to run it next year.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"73XHAYVUZFGMBAMJGZE7HNUSPA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972451},"content":"I’m there, “Don’t be ridiculous.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"U2GZQGMYGVHSFM4ZRG3YEBX4TU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972452},"content":"“I’m not being ridiculous. I’m going to run it just to prove you wrong.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"KL472EEKDJEB7MGMNLUFXH37QU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972453},"content":"“Er, I just said I was <i>proud </i>of you?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"GEVP2DJ5RRCXLLNEJW4KJHQYYY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972454},"content":"She goes, “What time did you finish in?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7CO7NDPKNBCRJKYWR6Z3BX7SR4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972455},"content":"I’m suddenly there, “Er, I’m racking my brains here to try to remember. It was definitely in the top percentage.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"JHPE3EIIQJE3VFHYFYYJJKWJHU","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972456},"content":"She’s like, “But what <i>time </i>did you finish in?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"VUGGOVYFX5AETF7BQCZTSBJBC4","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972457},"content":"I straight away know what her game is here. She’s going to try to run it faster than me, thereby undermining my achievement.","type":"text"},{"_id":"TQ42NYANSNCK3NO3RW3KUFSVHQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972458},"content":"I’m there, “I’m pretty sure it was, like, three hours and 20 minutes – somewhere in and around that ballpork.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"D4AEUFJWBFACXOJP7QSLJCACYI","additional_properties":{"_id":"6VAIDEKLFVCTXAKO3YJNLPMJCE"},"content":"‘The thought of booking a table for one at Shanahan’s on the Green got me through my prison sentence’","type":"interstitial_link"},{"_id":"25EYPF2K6JGZRNJOOALN4GIJ34","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972459},"content":"She calls up a number on her phone, then dials it. It turns out that it’s the number for home.","type":"text"},{"_id":"J2TZDMA66RFLFLEVRB65NWFSTA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972460},"content":"She goes, “Mom, can you do me a favour? Can you go into the living room? Okay, you know that photograph of Dad crossing the line in the marathon? The one where the toothbrush beat him in the final sprint – yeah, that one.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"C3VWCHZM3FEH7N5LFWGPYI5KKA","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972461},"content":"I’m like, “This is very childish, Honor.”","type":"text"},{"_id":"7RRG4MZAIFCWBHGJPJNQ3JI5WY","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972462},"content":"She’s there, “What time does it say on the clock above his head?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"SNCZOZMVMVHIPKFYQJWT2AXC24","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972463},"content":"I’m like, “Why are you so hung up on my time?”","type":"text"},{"_id":"BPHTOY3V3ZD3HHT4OQ4ZWSRJHQ","additional_properties":{"_id":1730116972464},"content":"She goes, “<i>Four</i> hours and 20 minutes! 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