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Supporting Children During Abuse | The Hotline
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-small" toggle="^.safety2//-" x-data="quickookie()" x-init="cookie_name='safety'" @click="set()"><span>Got it</span></a></p> </div> </div> <div class="modal1" data-modal="500" data-id="1" id="site-modal"> <div class="modal1-overlay"></div> <div class="modal1-outer"> <div class="modal1-wrap"> <div class="safety1"> <h2>Security Alert</h2> <p>Internet usage can be monitored and is impossible to erase completely. If you’re concerned your internet usage might be monitored, call us at 800.799.SAFE (7233). <strong><a href="https://www.thehotline.org/plan-for-safety/internet-safety/">Learn more about digital security</a></strong> and remember to clear your browser history after visiting this website.</p> <p><strong>Click the red “X” in the upper-right corner or “Escape” button on your keyboard twice at any time to leave TheHotline.org immediately.</strong></p> <p class="safety1-action"><a href="#" class="button1 -small" toggle="^.modal1//-" x-data="quickookie()" x-init="cookie_name='modal'" @click="set()"><span>OK</span></a></p> </div> </div> </div> </div> <section role="main" class="content1" id="content" data-warning="Your browser is outdated, it will not render this page properly, please upgrade."> <div class="wrap1"> <div class="wrap1-inner -contain"> <div class="header4"> <div class="header4-main"> <h1 class="title1" reveal="1+/0"> Supporting your children <span><br>Be there for them.</span> </h1> </div> <figure class="header4-image" reveal="1+/1"> <span class="img1 " style="--r: 0.8" > <img class="lazyload" data-src="https://www.thehotline.org/wp-content/uploads/media/2020/09/1168467477-hotline-700x560-1.png" alt="" data-srcset="https://www.thehotline.org/wp-content/uploads/media/2020/09/1168467477-hotline-700x560-1.png 700w, https://www.thehotline.org/wp-content/uploads/media/2020/09/1168467477-hotline-700x560-1-500x400.png 500w" data-sizes="auto" /> <i class="loader1 "></i> <noscript><img src="https://www.thehotline.org/wp-content/uploads/media/2020/09/1168467477-hotline-700x560-1.png" alt=""></noscript> </span> <figcaption class="sr-only"></figcaption> </figure> </div> </div> </div> <div class="-xw:4 -contain -mx:a -wysiwyg"><p>If you have children, identify ways to keep them safe when violence occurs — before it takes place. That includes at home, when you’re out and about in public, and if your children spend any unsupervised time with your abusive partner.</p> <p>You know what’s best for your children. <strong><a href="https://www.thehotline.org/get-help/">Our advocates are available 24/7</a></strong> to help you find ways to keep your children safe and to help you equip them with the knowledge they need to get themselves to safety.</p> <h2>Safety planning</h2> <p>An effective safety plan includes personalized planning to keep your children safe at home and during any unsupervised time they may spend with your partner. That includes talking to your children about age-appropriate ways to protect themselves when violence occurs as well as details and items to remember while preparing to leave an abusive situation and after.</p> <p>Our advocates are available 24/7 to discuss your situation and help you <strong><a href="https://www.thehotline.org/create-a-safety-plan/">create a safety plan</a></strong> for your children. If your children are old enough, <strong><a href="https://www.thehotline.org/resources/safety-planning-with-children/">brainstorm with them</a></strong> to come up with ways that they can stay safe using the same model as you would for yourself.</p> <p><a href="https://www.thehotline.org/what-to-expect-when-you-contact-us/">What to expect when you contact us</a></p> </div> <div class="wrap1 -decontain -o:h -c:a2 -mb:0 reveal="1+/2"> <div class="wrap1-inner -contain -cs:1"> <div class="checklist1"> <div class="checklist1-header" reveal="1/" aligned> <div class="checklist1-up"> <h2>Children and domestic violence</h2> <p><p>Children who experience abusive situations are forced to process complex emotions, often without access to the resources they need to do so. Planning for your children’s physical and emotional health is essential for their short-term and long-term wellbeing, no matter how old they are.</p> </p> </div> <figure class="checklist1-image -mt:1" style="max-width: 200px;"> <span class="img1 " style="--r: 1" > <img class="lazyload" data-src="https://www.thehotline.org/wp-content/uploads/media/2020/09/1060636928-hotline-400x400-1.png" alt="" data-srcset="https://www.thehotline.org/wp-content/uploads/media/2020/09/1060636928-hotline-400x400-1.png 400w" data-sizes="auto" /> <i class="loader1 "></i> <noscript><img src="https://www.thehotline.org/wp-content/uploads/media/2020/09/1060636928-hotline-400x400-1.png" alt=""></noscript> </span> <figcaption class="sr-only"></figcaption> </figure> <div class="decor1"></div> </div> <div class="checklist1-content" reveal="1/" aligned> <div class="checklist1-entry"> <h4>Remind them that their first responsibility is their own safety</h4> <p>even if they want to protect you or someone else in a moment of crisis. Teach them that you want everyone to be safe and that the preparations you’re making are to ensure their safety and everyone else’s during an emergency.</p> </div> <div class="checklist1-entry"> <h4>Your partner may try to use your children to harm you </h4> <p>by also abusing them, or by threatening, harassing, or manipulating you or your children depending on the situation. Examples include preventing you from seeing your children, calling or threatening to call police or immigration enforcement to gain custody of your children, humiliating you in front of them, using your children to monitor your behavior, or lying to your children to turn them against you.</p> </div> <div class="checklist1-entry"> <h4>Never blame your children for their responses to your partner’s abusive behavior</h4> <p>especially if they intentionally or unintentionally reveal your plan to leave. Make sure they know the violence isn’t their fault and that abuse is never okay, even when it comes from someone they love.</p> </div> <div class="checklist1-entry"> <h4>It’s important that your children have access to people other than yourself who they feel comfortable talking with and expressing themselves to.</h4> <p>Help them identify these people in their life and make sure they can contact them when needed. If possible, enroll them in a culturally relevant counseling program or therapy specializing in child counseling. Many domestic violence shelters offer children’s counseling – contact a Hotline advocate today to find out what local resources are near you.</p> </div> <div class="checklist1-entry"> <h4>Above all else, remind your children that you’re there for them</h4> <p>and that you love them unconditionally.</p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="-mb:0"> <div class="wrap1 -c:b3 -bump -noimage"> <div class="wrap1-inner -contain"> <div class="header3"> <div class="header3-wrap"> <h2 class="header3-title" reveal="1/">We're here to support you on your path to safety.</h2> <p class="iconed2" reveal="1/"> <i class="icon-star"></i> <span>You are not alone.</span> </p> </div> </div> <div class="resource1 -noimage"> <h3 class="-mb:1 -xw:4 " reveal="1/">Learn more about planning with your children:</h3> <div class="stream1"> <div class="stream1-entries -gg:1" g1> <div class="stream1-entry" w="24/12//" reveal="1/" aligned> <div class="card2"> <a href="https://www.thehotline.org/resources/safety-planning-with-children/" class="card2-wrap"> <div class="card2-main"> <h3 class="card2-title -t:4">Safety Planning with Children</h3> <p class="card2-icon"><i class="icon-arrow-right"></i></p> </div> </a> </div> </div> <div class="stream1-entry" w="24/12//" reveal="1/" aligned> <div class="card2"> <a href="https://www.thehotline.org/resources/emotional-safety-planning-with-children/" class="card2-wrap"> <div class="card2-main"> <h3 class="card2-title -t:4">Emotional Safety Planning with Children</h3> <p class="card2-icon"><i class="icon-arrow-right"></i></p> </div> </a> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </section> <footer class="footer1" id="footer" role="contentinfo"> <div class="footer1-wrap -contain -cs:1 -t:10"> <div class="footer1-main"> <div class="footer1-block"> <h4 class="footer1-subtitle">Contact</h4> <address>National Domestic Violence Hotline<br /> PO Box 90249<br /> Austin, Texas 78709<br /> Administrative Line: 737-225-3150</address> </div> <div class="footer1-block"> <h4 class="footer1-subtitle">Follow</h4> <div class="socials1"> <ul class="socials1-items" g2> <li><a href="https://www.facebook.com/NationalDomesticViolenceHotline/" class="icon-facebook" aria-label="Share on Facebook"><span>Facebook</span></a></li> <li><a href="https://instagram.com/NDVHofficial/" class="icon-instagram" aria-label="Share on Instagram"><span>Instagram</span></a></li> <li><a href="https://twitter.com/NDVH/" class="icon-twitter-x" aria-label="Share on X"><span>X</span></a></li> <li><a href="https://www.youtube.com/user/NDVHotline/" class="icon-youtube" aria-label="Share on YouTube"><span>YouTube</span></a></li> </ul> </div> </div> <div class="footer1-block -copys -as:3"> <p>The Hotline<span class="trademark" style="font-size: 25px; vertical-align: -webkit-baseline-middle;">®</span><br /> National Domestic Violence Hotline</p> <p><a href="/privacy-policy">Privacy Policy</a></p> </div> </div> <div class="footer1-fine"> <div class="footer1-half"> <p>This project was supported by Grant Number 90EV0459 from the Administration on Children, Youth and Families, Family and Youth Services Bureau, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. 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