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margin: 0 0 0.5em 0.5em; text-align:left; border: 1px solid #33CC00; width:175px;"> <tbody><tr> <td style="font-size: 95%; text-align:center; color:White; background-color:#33CC00"><b>Live, reproduce, die</b><br /><a href="/wiki/Biology" title="Biology"><font size="4" color="White"><b>Biology</b></font></a> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="background-color:#e1ffd6;" align="center"><a href="/wiki/Category:Biology" title="Category:Biology"><img alt="Icon bioDNA.svg" src="/w/images/thumb/d/d1/Icon_bioDNA.svg/100px-Icon_bioDNA.svg.png" decoding="async" width="100" height="100" srcset="/w/images/thumb/d/d1/Icon_bioDNA.svg/150px-Icon_bioDNA.svg.png 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/d/d1/Icon_bioDNA.svg/200px-Icon_bioDNA.svg.png 2x" data-file-width="200" data-file-height="200" /></a> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="font-size: 95%; color:White; background-color:#33CC00; text-align:center;"><b>Life as we know it</b> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="font-size: 95%; background-color:#e1ffd6;"> <ul><li><a href="/wiki/Genetics" title="Genetics">Genetics</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Evolution" title="Evolution">Evolution</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Cell" title="Cell">Fundamental unit of life: The cell</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Zoology" class="mw-redirect" title="Zoology">Zoology</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Botany" class="mw-redirect" title="Botany">Botany</a></li></ul> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="font-size: 95%; color:White; background-color:#33CC00; text-align:center;"><b>Divide and multiply</b> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="font-size: 95%; background-color:#e1ffd6;"> <ul><li><a href="/wiki/Lyme_disease" title="Lyme disease">Lyme disease</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Biology" title="Biology">Biology</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Louis_Pasteur" title="Louis Pasteur">Louis Pasteur</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Fungus" title="Fungus">Fungus</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Horizontal_gene_transfer" title="Horizontal gene transfer">Horizontal gene transfer</a></li></ul> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="font-size: 95%; color:White; background-color:#33CC00; text-align:center;"><b>Great Apes</b> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="font-size: 95%; background-color:#e1ffd6;"> <ul><li><a href="/wiki/John_Everett" title="John Everett">John Everett</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Gerhard_D._Wassermann" title="Gerhard D. Wassermann">Gerhard D. Wassermann</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Theodosius_Dobzhansky" title="Theodosius Dobzhansky">Theodosius Dobzhansky</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Desiree_Jennings" title="Desiree Jennings">Desiree Jennings</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Razib_Khan" title="Razib Khan">Razib Khan</a></li></ul> <div class="vte plainlinks" style="font-size:smaller; text-align:center;"><a href="/wiki/Template:Biology" title="Template:Biology">v</a> - <a href="/wiki/Template_talk:Biology" title="Template talk:Biology">t</a> - <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://rationalwiki.org/w/index.php?title=Template:Biology&action=edit">e</a></div> </td></tr></tbody></table> <table style="margin: auto; border-collapse:collapse; border-style:none; background-color:transparent;" class="cquote"> <tbody><tr> <td><div style="padding:4px 50px;position:relative;"><span style="position:absolute;left:10px;top:-6px;z-index:1;font-family:'Times New Roman',serif;font-weight:bold;color:#B2B7F2;font-size:36px">“</span><span style="position:absolute;right:10px;bottom:-20px;z-index:1;font-family:'Times New Roman',serif;font-weight:bold;color:#B2B7F2;font-size:36px">”</span>One cat just leads to another.</div> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="padding:4px 10px 8px;font-size:smaller;line-height:1.6em;text-align:right;"><cite style="font-style:normal;position:relative;z-index:2">—Ernest Hemingway<sup id="cite_ref-1" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-1">[1]</a></sup></cite> </td></tr></tbody></table> <table style="margin: auto; border-collapse:collapse; border-style:none; background-color:transparent;" class="cquote"> <tbody><tr> <td><div style="padding:4px 50px;position:relative;"><span style="position:absolute;left:10px;top:-6px;z-index:1;font-family:'Times New Roman',serif;font-weight:bold;color:#B2B7F2;font-size:36px">“</span><span style="position:absolute;right:10px;bottom:-20px;z-index:1;font-family:'Times New Roman',serif;font-weight:bold;color:#B2B7F2;font-size:36px">”</span>That cat’s something I can’t explain</div> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="padding:4px 10px 8px;font-size:smaller;line-height:1.6em;text-align:right;"><cite style="font-style:normal;position:relative;z-index:2">—Pink Floyd “Lucifer Sam” <sup id="cite_ref-2" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-2">[2]</a></sup></cite> </td></tr></tbody></table> <p>A <b>cat</b> is a cute domestic or wild <a href="/wiki/Animal" title="Animal">animal</a> <s>that secretly rules over us humans while tricking us into thinking that <i>we</i> are its "owners"</s><sup id="cite_ref-3" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-3">[3]</a></sup> <a href="/wiki/File:Pussy01.gif" class="image"><img alt="Pussy01.gif" src="/w/images/e/e4/Pussy01.gif" decoding="async" width="31" height="27" data-file-width="31" data-file-height="27" /></a> or, unless they remain indoors at all times, a little unholy wildlife-decimating abomination<sup id="cite_ref-4" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-4">[4]</a></sup><sup id="cite_ref-5" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-5">[5]</a></sup> that makes insufferable noises (and often also serves as a general term for members of the family <i>Felidae</i>, wild or domesticated). Unlike <a href="/wiki/Dog" class="mw-redirect" title="Dog">Dogs</a>, Cats can for the most part take care of themselves. </p> <div id="toc" class="toc" role="navigation" aria-labelledby="mw-toc-heading"><input type="checkbox" role="button" id="toctogglecheckbox" class="toctogglecheckbox" style="display:none" /><div class="toctitle" lang="en" dir="ltr"><h2 id="mw-toc-heading">Contents</h2><span class="toctogglespan"><label class="toctogglelabel" for="toctogglecheckbox"></label></span></div> <ul> <li class="toclevel-1 tocsection-1"><a href="#Cats.21"><span class="tocnumber">1</span> <span class="toctext">Cats!</span></a> <ul> <li class="toclevel-2 tocsection-2"><a href="#Amazing_facts_about_cats_that_you_won.27t_believe"><span class="tocnumber">1.1</span> <span class="toctext">Amazing facts about cats that you won't believe</span></a></li> <li class="toclevel-2 tocsection-3"><a href="#Cats_are_like_Yahweh"><span class="tocnumber">1.2</span> <span class="toctext">Cats are like Yahweh</span></a></li> </ul> </li> <li class="toclevel-1 tocsection-4"><a href="#Some_cats"><span class="tocnumber">2</span> <span class="toctext">Some cats</span></a></li> <li class="toclevel-1 tocsection-5"><a href="#Purrrversity"><span class="tocnumber">3</span> <span class="toctext">Purrrversity</span></a></li> <li class="toclevel-1 tocsection-6"><a href="#See_also"><span class="tocnumber">4</span> <span class="toctext">See also</span></a></li> <li class="toclevel-1 tocsection-7"><a href="#Don.27t_see_also"><span class="tocnumber">5</span> <span class="toctext">Don't see also</span></a></li> <li class="toclevel-1 tocsection-8"><a href="#External_links"><span class="tocnumber">6</span> <span class="toctext">External links</span></a></li> <li class="toclevel-1 tocsection-9"><a href="#Notes"><span class="tocnumber">7</span> <span class="toctext">Notes</span></a></li> <li class="toclevel-1 tocsection-10"><a href="#References"><span class="tocnumber">8</span> <span class="toctext">References</span></a></li> </ul> </div> <h2><span id="Cats!"></span><span class="mw-headline" id="Cats.21">Cats!</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=1" title="Edit section: Cats!">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h2> <div class="thumb tright"><div class="thumbinner" style="width:252px;"><a href="/wiki/File:European_Wildcat_Nationalpark_Bayerischer_Wald_03.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c8/European_Wildcat_Nationalpark_Bayerischer_Wald_03.jpg/250px-European_Wildcat_Nationalpark_Bayerischer_Wald_03.jpg" decoding="async" width="250" height="167" class="thumbimage" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c8/European_Wildcat_Nationalpark_Bayerischer_Wald_03.jpg/375px-European_Wildcat_Nationalpark_Bayerischer_Wald_03.jpg 1.5x, https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c8/European_Wildcat_Nationalpark_Bayerischer_Wald_03.jpg/500px-European_Wildcat_Nationalpark_Bayerischer_Wald_03.jpg 2x" data-file-width="3473" data-file-height="2315" /></a> <div class="thumbcaption"><div class="magnify"><a href="/wiki/File:European_Wildcat_Nationalpark_Bayerischer_Wald_03.jpg" class="internal" title="Enlarge"></a></div>Above: a wildcat (<i>Felis silvestris</i>), not a domesticated cat. (Do not pet.)</div></div></div> <div class="thumb tright"><div class="thumbinner" style="width:252px;"><a href="/wiki/File:CatClaw.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/b/be/CatClaw.jpg/250px-CatClaw.jpg" decoding="async" width="250" height="187" class="thumbimage" srcset="/w/images/thumb/b/be/CatClaw.jpg/375px-CatClaw.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/b/be/CatClaw.jpg/500px-CatClaw.jpg 2x" data-file-width="800" data-file-height="599" /></a> <div class="thumbcaption"><div class="magnify"><a href="/wiki/File:CatClaw.jpg" class="internal" title="Enlarge"></a></div>Largely Offensive <a href="/wiki/Fun:Weapon_of_gun" title="Fun:Weapon of gun">Weapon Of Claw</a></div></div></div> <div class="thumb tright"><div class="thumbinner" style="width:252px;"><a href="/wiki/File:Mrcat.jpg" class="image"><img alt="Mrcat.jpg" src="/w/images/thumb/9/9f/Mrcat.jpg/250px-Mrcat.jpg" decoding="async" width="250" height="333" class="thumbimage" srcset="/w/images/thumb/9/9f/Mrcat.jpg/375px-Mrcat.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/9/9f/Mrcat.jpg/500px-Mrcat.jpg 2x" data-file-width="3024" data-file-height="4032" /></a> <div class="thumbcaption"><div class="magnify"><a href="/wiki/File:Mrcat.jpg" class="internal" title="Enlarge"></a></div></div></div></div> <table style="margin: auto; border-collapse:collapse; border-style:none; background-color:transparent;" class="cquote"> <tbody><tr> <td><div style="padding:4px 50px;position:relative;"><span style="position:absolute;left:10px;top:-6px;z-index:1;font-family:'Times New Roman',serif;font-weight:bold;color:#B2B7F2;font-size:36px">“</span><span style="position:absolute;right:10px;bottom:-20px;z-index:1;font-family:'Times New Roman',serif;font-weight:bold;color:#B2B7F2;font-size:36px">”</span>Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are God. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are Gods.</div> </td></tr> <tr> <td style="padding:4px 10px 8px;font-size:smaller;line-height:1.6em;text-align:right;"><cite style="font-style:normal;position:relative;z-index:2">—<a href="/wiki/Christopher_Hitchens" title="Christopher Hitchens">Christopher Hitchens</a>, <i>The Portable Atheist: Essential Readings for the Nonbeliever</i><sup id="cite_ref-6" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-6">[6]</a></sup></cite> </td></tr></tbody></table> <p>A domestic cat (<i>Felis catus</i> or <i>Felis silvestris catus</i>, depending on whom you ask) is a member of the <a href="/wiki/User:Arthropleura/Felidae" title="User:Arthropleura/Felidae">Felidae</a>, or feline, family of animals, readily identifiable by its adorableness, other affiliated quirks and charms, or from the rancid blood of baby chickadees that clings to its flea-ridden fur. A cat is a vicious, <b>evil</b> mini-lion that will rake its claws across a human's face when it is being petted.<sup id="cite_ref-7" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-7">[7]</a></sup> Other than that, the main contribution cats make to our lives is their ability to move with supernatural grace, although outdoor cats earn the well-deserved ire of <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_World" class="extiw" title="wp:New World" rel="nofollow"><span style="color:#477979 !important;" title="Wikipedia: New World">New World</span></a><sup><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/12px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png" decoding="async" width="12" height="12" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/18px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 1.5x, https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/24px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 2x" data-file-width="128" data-file-height="128" /></sup> ecologists and those who don't want to listen to two unpleasant, moaning cats in the middle of the night. Where a <a href="/wiki/Dog" class="mw-redirect" title="Dog">dog</a> would run through a flower patch, stepping randomly on every flower on the way, felines are aware of where they place their feet at every step, their back foot going in the exact same spot as the front foot. A cat can jump 4 feet up onto a mantlepiece covered with fragile knicknacks, and not knock over a single one. Unless they want to. It should be noted that a cat apparently derives great pleasure from gently pushing things (the more fragile/breakable the better) off of surfaces and onto the floor below, and then maintaining a look of injured innocence. </p><p>Cats are (usually) the natural enemies of <i>all</i> other smaller life forms and delight in <a href="/wiki/Torture" title="Torture">torturing</a> smaller beasts by killing them <i>slowly</i>. Examples include <a href="/wiki/Mowse" class="mw-redirect" title="Mowse">mice</a>, <a href="/wiki/RationalWiki" title="RationalWiki">rats</a>, or, if the cat is exceptionally lucky, a <a href="/wiki/Long-eared_jerboa" class="mw-redirect" title="Long-eared jerboa">long-eared jerboa</a>. The only animal smaller than a cat that the cat does not do such to is a smaller dog, the smallest dogs (usually terrier breeds) that the cat might treat as if a fellow cat. <a href="/wiki/File:Pussy02.gif" class="image"><img alt="Pussy02.gif" src="/w/images/e/e4/Pussy02.gif" decoding="async" width="19" height="18" data-file-width="19" data-file-height="18" /></a> However, a cat may be able to suppress this instinct if raised with the animal,<sup id="cite_ref-8" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-8">[8]</a></sup> although there's no telling when it will attack other animals (for example, a cat who grew up with mice may be willing to slaughter <a href="/wiki/Hamster" class="mw-redirect" title="Hamster">hamsters</a>). The mere fact that an animal is larger than any particular cat is no guarantee that it will be safe from attack. Humans can satisfy this instinct in a more <a href="/wiki/Environmental" class="mw-redirect" title="Environmental">environmentally</a>-acceptable manner by casting balls of wool and small fluffy toys for them to play with. It should be noted, however, that a cat will prefer to play with a ball of wool which is in use rather than one which has been provided for the purpose. </p><p>Cats carry in their little heads a detailed mental map of every place they frequent, and are visibly startled when a new object appears — especially if it is another cat or a person screaming and running to have it get the fuck off the yard. This being a rather effective <a href="/wiki/Adaptation" title="Adaptation">adaptation</a> for a relatively small animal that must contend with some much larger predators, including coyotes and owls (neither which have decimated wildlife on the same degree cats have done), cats will often explore whatever additions or alterations they find to ensure their awareness of any and all gaps they may hide in, and whether or not such gaps can be used for ambush purposes. </p><p>Cats are an interesting quirk of <a href="/wiki/Evolution" title="Evolution">evolution</a> — at an early point in <a href="/wiki/Human" title="Human">human</a> <a href="/wiki/History" title="History">history</a> (roughly 12,000 years ago),<sup id="cite_ref-9" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-9">[note 1]</a></sup> <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/wildcat" class="extiw" title="wp:wildcat" rel="nofollow"><span style="color:#477979 !important;" title="Wikipedia: wildcat">wildcats</span></a><sup><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/12px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png" decoding="async" width="12" height="12" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/18px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 1.5x, https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/24px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 2x" data-file-width="128" data-file-height="128" /></sup> (<i>Felis silvestris</i>) began to live near settled humans, and by their reliance on early human tribes, decided to <s>domesticate humans while making them think that cats</s> let themselves be domesticated, and developed traits to aid in their newfound life.<sup id="cite_ref-10" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-10">[9]</a></sup> As mentioned in the caption, the furry <a href="/wiki/Mammal" title="Mammal">mammal</a> in the top picture of the two in this section is a wildcat and not a domesticated cat (though they do have a similar appearance to domesticated cats), so petting it is not a good idea. Wildcats are close relatives of the domesticated cat and the latter is generally considered to be a subspecies of the former by <a href="/wiki/Biologist" class="mw-redirect" title="Biologist">biologists</a> who do not consider the two to be separate <a href="/wiki/Species" title="Species">species</a> (biologists that do classify them as separate species refer to them as <i>Felis catus</i>; biologists who don't use <i>Felis silvestris catus</i>). It is believed that cats were accepted by people after communities started to store surplus grain and other food products, which attracted the rodents that cats so skillfully hunt and kill, making cats useful to have around — especially since, being obligatory carnivores, the kitties wouldn't turn around and eat the grain themselves. </p><p>Felines in fact might have been domesticated twice, as the unrelated <b>Leopard Cat</b> (<i>Prionailurus bengalensis</i>) has a now extinct domesticated Chinese subspecies, which underwent extinction as it was replaced by typical <i>Felis catus</i> in human homes.<sup id="cite_ref-11" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-11">[10]</a></sup> </p><p>Ancient <a href="/wiki/Egypt" title="Egypt">Egypt</a> was thought to be the first civilization to domesticate cats, but that has been proven false. The Egyptian word for cat is "Mau", which sounds awfully like "meow". They worshipped <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bastet" class="extiw" title="wp:Bastet" rel="nofollow"><span style="color:#477979 !important;" title="Wikipedia: Bastet">Bastet</span></a>,<sup><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/12px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png" decoding="async" width="12" height="12" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/18px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 1.5x, https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/24px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 2x" data-file-width="128" data-file-height="128" /></sup> a cat-headed <a href="/wiki/Goddess" class="mw-redirect" title="Goddess">goddess</a>. </p><p>In return for food, drink, excrement removal, bed, and <a href="/wiki/Universal_health_care" title="Universal health care">universal health care</a>, a cat gives back companionship and a daily lesson in how to move. Occasionally a cat will present its <s>owner</s> property with the corpse of an even smaller mammal or <a href="/wiki/Bird" title="Bird">avian</a>. Often this <i>gift</i> will be in installments — later portions being regurgitated, often on the furniture or person of the human cohabitee. A cat has the ability to look at anything or anyone with utmost disdain because of their <s>conviction of</s> total superiority. Cats can also <i>see things that aren't there</i> — they will suddenly stare at a point in <a href="/wiki/Space" title="Space">space</a>, causing their human companions to believe that there is a '"presence" in the area. </p><p>A human cannot decide that a cat will like a particular food; the more a person so believes, the more likely the cat is to spurn it — that is, unless it is tuna: cats will only eat food that they can smell, and <a href="/wiki/Fish" title="Fish">fish</a> foods definitely rank among the most odoriferous. A cat unfed for a certain period of time (currently estimated at seventeen minutes but subject to future testing) is in danger of expiring from starvation. This is evidenced by pityful "wowlings" at its human servitors and fixed staring at anything being eaten or drunk by them. </p><p>Cats are the Inspection Officers of their households — no new item or being may be introduced to the cat's place of abode (it is <i>their</i> place of abode, <b>not</b> yours) without the Inspection Officer giving it the once over. If it is an object, it will need to be sat on — or in — to test it for suitability. If it is an item of comfort, such as a cushion, blanket or human being, the Inspection Officer must use it first to ascertain its coziness. An empty box must be occupied and defended. All items leaving the household must also be inspected — for example, suitcases.<sup id="cite_ref-12" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-12">[11]</a></sup> Even glasses <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_-RoKOAkro&list=UUvLKUg5hATPatKLYnxKXzXg">cannot be spared.</a> </p><p>If a cat sleeps on a human's bed, it will have preferred locations that are calculated to be the most inconvenient/painful for the other occupants. Prior to curling on the lower abdomen or immediately beneath the chin, the cat will stamp around with claws extended, with the potential of causing extreme damage to irreplaceable parts of their human servitors. </p> <div class="thumb tright"><div class="thumbinner" style="width:252px;"><a href="/wiki/File:Cattrap.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/7/7e/Cattrap.jpg/250px-Cattrap.jpg" decoding="async" width="250" height="188" class="thumbimage" srcset="/w/images/thumb/7/7e/Cattrap.jpg/375px-Cattrap.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/7/7e/Cattrap.jpg 2x" data-file-width="460" data-file-height="345" /></a> <div class="thumbcaption"><div class="magnify"><a href="/wiki/File:Cattrap.jpg" class="internal" title="Enlarge"></a></div>A primed cat trap, awaiting hand prey</div></div></div> <p>Cats also enjoy setting a bear trap for their owners in the form of rolling onto their backs with a sweet look on their face while exposing their tummies, thus enticing human hands into the focal point of all four razor edged paws and teeth. Within a split second of initial hand-to-tummy contact, the trap is triggered, and the owner's hand becomes clamped into a barrage of scratching, biting, and strange back-legged cycle kicking. Despite the resultant injuries from such an attack, cat owners have been known to fall for this trap multiple times, <a href="/wiki/Masochist" class="mw-redirect" title="Masochist">some</a> possibly enjoying it. (Protip: they're asking for head scratches.) </p><p>Cats are known enemies to things like "productivity", as this well-documented <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://archive.is/OhmlU">photo essay</a> will attest to. Infant cats are called <i>kittens</i>, and are even deadlier than normal cats due to their even sharper claws and their ability to override all <a href="/wiki/Rational" class="mw-redirect" title="Rational">rational</a> thought in nearby humans. <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/231:_Cat_Proximity">But they are oh-so-cuu-uute!</a> </p><p>People seem to be incapable of <a href="/wiki/Neutral" class="mw-redirect" title="Neutral">neutrality</a> towards cats. They either love them or hate them. Bird lovers probably hate cats the most. Dog lovers also seem to hate cats a lot, though there are rather a lot of oddballs who keep both types of pet in the same household successfully. In such cases, the dog might treat a cat as if a puppy and have a wholesome relationship. Cats are able to sniff out those who are not enamoured and will preferentially approach, snuggle, and rub against them.<sup id="cite_ref-13" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-13">[12]</a></sup> Persons <i>allergic</i> to cats are especially likely to be treated in this manner. </p> <h3><span id="Amazing_facts_about_cats_that_you_won't_believe"></span><span class="mw-headline" id="Amazing_facts_about_cats_that_you_won.27t_believe">Amazing facts about cats that you won't believe</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=2" title="Edit section: Amazing facts about cats that you won't believe">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h3> <ul><li>A cat can hear the pulling of a ringpull on a can of catfood at 50 metres.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats are a major vector of <i><a href="/wiki/Toxoplasma_gondii" title="Toxoplasma gondii">Toxoplasma gondii</a></i>.</li></ul> <ul><li>The only non-fecal product of cats is the hairball, designed to bring the barefoot morning person rudely awake upon stepping in it. This can be avoided by combing the cat to get rid of hairs so they don't get clogged in the throat.</li></ul> <ul><li>According to most <a href="/wiki/Guide_to_Bible_translations" class="mw-redirect" title="Guide to Bible translations">translations</a> of the <a href="/wiki/Bible" title="Bible">Bible</a>, it is apparently only worthy to mention cats once.<sup id="cite_ref-14" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-14">[13]</a></sup></li></ul> <ul><li>Cats generally don't have a good relationship with man's best friend, even though they both descended from <i>Miacis</i>. Although to be fair, all animals share a <a href="/wiki/Common_ancestor" class="mw-redirect" title="Common ancestor">common ancestor</a> if you go back far enough. Still, the dog is one of the few animals that <i>can</i> get along spontaneously with cats, and the cat is one of the few animals that can get along spontaneously with dogs. Humans are another, and perhaps the only one for both, which says much about humans, dogs, and cats — three consummately brutal predators.</li></ul> <ul><li>Despite all their disdain for dogs, the vast majority of their hate is reserved for the red dot.</li></ul> <ul><li>Now iconic in popular <a href="/wiki/Culture" title="Culture">culture</a>, the domestic housecat is the source of various internet comedy <a href="/wiki/Meme" title="Meme">memes</a>.</li></ul> <ul><li>The major difference between cats and their traditional foe, dogs: "dogs have <i>owners</i>, cats have <i>cults</i>."</li></ul> <ul><li>In defiance of known laws of <a href="/wiki/Relativity" title="Relativity">relativity</a> and <a href="/wiki/Quantum_physics" class="mw-redirect" title="Quantum physics">quantum physics</a>, cats have a unique ability to be in two places at once. They <i>were</i> in the room you just left but are next to the food bowl in the kitchen <i>before you arrive there</i>.</li></ul> <ul><li>Most cats react in a rather peculiar manner to the herb <i>Nepeta cataria</i>, more popularly known as "catnip". This plant, related to the mint family, seems to affect a majority of cats in a manner similar to how Cannabis sativa affects humans, except that, unlike pot, catnip's effect on cats happens <i>without</i> requiring combustion or other heating of plant matter. Simply crushing the plant is enough. (Protip: pick up the foliage and gently rub it against your cat's face.) Its effect is much shorter-lived than marijuana's, and it also doesn't seem to give felines the munchies.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats have a highly sophisticated <s>matter replicator</s> digestion system that can inexplicably poop out at least 2.5 times more matter than was ingested in the first place. This must mean only one thing...</li></ul> <big><big><center>Cats are <i><b>MAGIC</b></i>.</center></big></big> <ul><li>Cats do occasionally attempt to communicate via <a href="/wiki/Computer" title="Computer">computer</a>: PawSense has been developed by those sufficiently warped not to submit to the superiority of the feline race.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats control your behavior towards them via their <a href="/wiki/Toxoplasma_gondii" title="Toxoplasma gondii">protozoan minions</a>.</li></ul> <ul><li>During the <a href="/wiki/Middle_Ages" title="Middle Ages">Middle Ages</a> and the <a href="/wiki/Renaissance" title="Renaissance">Renaissance</a>, it was believed that cats were <a href="/wiki/Superstition" title="Superstition">linked to the devil</a>; consequently, many were <a href="/wiki/European_witch-hunts" title="European witch-hunts">burnt at the stake</a>. Had this not happened, then the <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Death" class="extiw" title="wp:Black Death" rel="nofollow"><span style="color:#477979 !important;" title="Wikipedia: Black Death">Black Death</span></a><sup><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/12px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png" decoding="async" width="12" height="12" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/18px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 1.5x, https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/24px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 2x" data-file-width="128" data-file-height="128" /></sup> <a href="/wiki/Irony" title="Irony">may not have been as deadly</a> to the populations it affected, as they may have helped bring down the plague-carrying rat population.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats bury their waste, which is something humans started doing only after cats discovered humans.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats require a very high protein diet which can only be achieved by sacrificing the flesh of lesser creatures; feeding a cat a <a href="/wiki/Vegan" class="mw-redirect" title="Vegan">vegan</a> diet is animal cruelty in a number of countries.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats are the favorite food of Melmacians, and cat juice is the their favorite drink. Being a cat-lover on Melmac is so horrible that it's the only thing worse than being born <i>in</i> wedlock (yes, you read that right).</li></ul> <ul><li>A group of cats is called a "clowder". Unrelated, if through poor decision-making you find yourself in Boston, don't eat the clam chowder.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats are worshipped as the givers of life, and so the fuzzy entrance to this world is ironically known affectionately as a "kitty".</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats are life members of the <a href="/wiki/Fun:Monty_Python" title="Fun:Monty Python">Society For Knocking Things Off Other Things</a>.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats are magnetically attracted to cardboard.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats hate Witchers.<sup id="cite_ref-15" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-15">[14]</a></sup></li></ul> <ul><li>Possibly the famousest cat of the 20<sup>th</sup> century, Socks the <a href="/wiki/White_House" class="mw-redirect" title="White House">White House</a> Cat, died of <a href="/wiki/Cancer" title="Cancer">cancer</a> in February 2009 at the age of 19.<sup id="cite_ref-16" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-16">[15]</a></sup></li></ul> <ul><li>Nearly as famous was Humphrey the <a href="/wiki/Prime_Minister_of_the_United_Kingdom" title="Prime Minister of the United Kingdom">Downing Street</a> cat, who prominently feuded with <a href="/wiki/Tony_Blair#Cherie_Blair" title="Tony Blair">Cherie Blair</a> and a duck but was unjustly accused of robin-murder.<sup id="cite_ref-17" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-17">[16]</a></sup></li></ul> <ul><li>A crocodile is the physical manifestation of what a cat thinks it is. Unless the cat in question decides that crocodiles are pansies.<sup id="cite_ref-18" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-18">[17]</a></sup></li></ul> <ul><li>Marc-Antoine Fardin was the winner of the 2017 <a href="/wiki/Ig_Nobel_Prize" title="Ig Nobel Prize">Ig Nobel Prize</a> in Physics for attempting to answer the question, "Can a Cat Be Both a Solid and a Liquid?"<sup id="cite_ref-19" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-19">[18]</a></sup><sup id="cite_ref-20" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-20">[19]</a></sup></li></ul> <ul><li>If you're into <s>"<a href="/wiki/Satan" title="Satan">Satan</a> worship"</s> <a href="/wiki/Dungeons_and_Dragons" class="mw-redirect" title="Dungeons and Dragons">Dungeons and Dragons</a>, cats <i>are</i> the bane of 1st-level characters that have low hit points, such as <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0780.html">commoners</a> or <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/2w8b0d/killer_cats/">wizards/sorcerers</a>, at least until <s>cat haters</s> WotC nerfed them on 5th edition. The <i>Forgotten Realms</i> setting has Sharess, the goddess of lust, hedonism, sensual fulfillment, and other neat similar stuff, who has associated with cats. Meow.</li></ul> <ul><li>For many small animals, the bite of a domestic cat is about as deadly as that of a rattlesnake, even if cats are not venomous. Cats have been known to kill rattlers with the horrific neck-bite that crushes the windpipe, severs the spinal cord, or pierces either the jugular vein or carotid artery, causing swift death.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cat bites are often deep, dirty puncture wounds that merit care as if they were bites from venomous snakes. Cat teeth are filthy with bacteria that can cause skin damage. Neglected cat bites have led to amputations and even deaths due to infections.</li></ul> <ul><li>Cats have in their eyes a <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tapetum_lucidum" class="extiw" title="wp:Tapetum lucidum" rel="nofollow"><span style="color:#477979 !important;" title="Wikipedia: Tapetum lucidum">Tapetum lucidum</span></a><sup><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/12px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png" decoding="async" width="12" height="12" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/18px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 1.5x, https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/5a/Wikipedia%27s_W.svg/24px-Wikipedia%27s_W.svg.png 2x" data-file-width="128" data-file-height="128" /></sup>, a layer of tissue that allows them to see well in low-light conditions, and when illuminated by a camera flash or a flashlight produces eyeshine, which can be (and often <b>is</b>) quite unsettling at night especially if you don't expect a cat to be there or know about the effect.</li></ul> <h3><span class="mw-headline" id="Cats_are_like_Yahweh">Cats are like Yahweh</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=3" title="Edit section: Cats are like Yahweh">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h3> <p>Cats bear several resemblances to <a href="/wiki/Yahweh" class="mw-redirect" title="Yahweh">Yahweh</a>: </p> <ul><li>Yahweh demands you live your life solely for him. Cats will likewise demand all your time and attention.</li> <li>If you don't obey Yahweh he will punish you with death (Judaism) or <a href="/wiki/Hell" title="Hell">Hell</a> (Christianity or Islam). If you don't obey a cat they will punish you with bites or scratches.</li> <li>Yahweh never tells you exactly what he wants, making his will known through <a href="/wiki/Mysterious_ways" class="mw-redirect" title="Mysterious ways">mysterious ways</a>. Cats do not use words to tell you want They want, instead making Their will known through purrs and meows.</li></ul> <p>There are, however, some differences. Notably, there is considerable evidence that cats exist. </p> <h2><span class="mw-headline" id="Some_cats">Some cats</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=4" title="Edit section: Some cats">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h2> <center> <ul class="gallery mw-gallery-traditional" style="max-width: 815px;"> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:2016-1223-abby.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/4/40/2016-1223-abby.jpg/90px-2016-1223-abby.jpg" decoding="async" width="90" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/4/40/2016-1223-abby.jpg/135px-2016-1223-abby.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/4/40/2016-1223-abby.jpg/180px-2016-1223-abby.jpg 2x" data-file-width="2448" data-file-height="3264" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>She looks innocent enough. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:35px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Domino01.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/e/e6/Domino01.jpg/120px-Domino01.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="80" srcset="/w/images/thumb/e/e6/Domino01.jpg/180px-Domino01.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/e/e6/Domino01.jpg/240px-Domino01.jpg 2x" data-file-width="450" data-file-height="301" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Domino (deceased) </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Tsgcwaassdf.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/3/3e/Tsgcwaassdf.jpg/86px-Tsgcwaassdf.jpg" decoding="async" width="86" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/3/3e/Tsgcwaassdf.jpg/129px-Tsgcwaassdf.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/3/3e/Tsgcwaassdf.jpg/172px-Tsgcwaassdf.jpg 2x" data-file-width="372" data-file-height="518" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Ginger Nuts </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Cat.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/d/d1/Cat.jpg/101px-Cat.jpg" decoding="async" width="101" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/d/d1/Cat.jpg/152px-Cat.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/d/d1/Cat.jpg 2x" data-file-width="180" data-file-height="213" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>A cat at infant stage, also known as a "kitty." </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Missy.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/4/4f/Missy.jpg/94px-Missy.jpg" decoding="async" width="94" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/4/4f/Missy.jpg/142px-Missy.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/4/4f/Missy.jpg/189px-Missy.jpg 2x" data-file-width="398" data-file-height="505" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>My cat pwns. (Or, rather, did pwn.) </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:CAT.JPG" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/f/fb/CAT.JPG/120px-CAT.JPG" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/f/fb/CAT.JPG/180px-CAT.JPG 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/f/fb/CAT.JPG/240px-CAT.JPG 2x" data-file-width="2048" data-file-height="1536" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>OC </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Tintin.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/c/c7/Tintin.jpg/120px-Tintin.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/c/c7/Tintin.jpg/180px-Tintin.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/c/c7/Tintin.jpg/240px-Tintin.jpg 2x" data-file-width="320" data-file-height="240" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Tintin </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:38px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Kitteh_Newton%27s_Cradle.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/3/37/Kitteh_Newton%27s_Cradle.jpg/120px-Kitteh_Newton%27s_Cradle.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="74" srcset="/w/images/thumb/3/37/Kitteh_Newton%27s_Cradle.jpg/180px-Kitteh_Newton%27s_Cradle.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/3/37/Kitteh_Newton%27s_Cradle.jpg/240px-Kitteh_Newton%27s_Cradle.jpg 2x" data-file-width="1622" data-file-height="1001" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p><i>My</i> cat evidences an appreciation for Newton's Cradles. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:DickieP.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/f/f7/DickieP.jpg/120px-DickieP.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/f/f7/DickieP.jpg/180px-DickieP.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/f/f7/DickieP.jpg/240px-DickieP.jpg 2x" data-file-width="604" data-file-height="453" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Dickie P </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Stevie.JPG" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/a/ac/Stevie.JPG/120px-Stevie.JPG" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/a/ac/Stevie.JPG/180px-Stevie.JPG 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/a/ac/Stevie.JPG/240px-Stevie.JPG 2x" data-file-width="2048" data-file-height="1536" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Oh no! The enemy!!! (a.k.a. Stevie) </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Coyote.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/2/26/Coyote.jpg/120px-Coyote.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/2/26/Coyote.jpg/180px-Coyote.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/2/26/Coyote.jpg/240px-Coyote.jpg 2x" data-file-width="604" data-file-height="451" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>That Coyote. That one. 2006-2014. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:32px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Yinyang.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/f/f6/Yinyang.jpg/120px-Yinyang.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="86" srcset="/w/images/thumb/f/f6/Yinyang.jpg/180px-Yinyang.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/f/f6/Yinyang.jpg/240px-Yinyang.jpg 2x" data-file-width="576" data-file-height="411" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Yin & Yang </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Dulicrolly.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/8/89/Dulicrolly.jpg/120px-Dulicrolly.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/8/89/Dulicrolly.jpg/180px-Dulicrolly.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/8/89/Dulicrolly.jpg/240px-Dulicrolly.jpg 2x" data-file-width="640" data-file-height="480" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Iz got 28 toes, Dulci </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Nutmeg.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/0/06/Nutmeg.jpg/83px-Nutmeg.jpg" decoding="async" width="83" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/0/06/Nutmeg.jpg/124px-Nutmeg.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/0/06/Nutmeg.jpg/166px-Nutmeg.jpg 2x" data-file-width="335" data-file-height="484" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Nutmeg </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Rusty-spotted_cat_1.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/6/67/Rusty-spotted_cat_1.jpg/108px-Rusty-spotted_cat_1.jpg" decoding="async" width="108" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/6/67/Rusty-spotted_cat_1.jpg/162px-Rusty-spotted_cat_1.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/6/67/Rusty-spotted_cat_1.jpg/216px-Rusty-spotted_cat_1.jpg 2x" data-file-width="995" data-file-height="1103" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Rusty-spotted Ceiling Cat is watching you masturbate. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:19.5px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Mo.JPG" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/e/e4/Mo.JPG/120px-Mo.JPG" decoding="async" width="120" height="111" srcset="/w/images/thumb/e/e4/Mo.JPG/180px-Mo.JPG 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/e/e4/Mo.JPG/240px-Mo.JPG 2x" data-file-width="500" data-file-height="461" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Some cats like to sit in small, often improvised, shelters such as a mound of wadded <a href="/wiki/Christmas" title="Christmas">Christmas</a> wrapping paper. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:SmokeyPillow.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/2/2f/SmokeyPillow.jpg/120px-SmokeyPillow.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/2/2f/SmokeyPillow.jpg/180px-SmokeyPillow.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/2/2f/SmokeyPillow.jpg/240px-SmokeyPillow.jpg 2x" data-file-width="1600" data-file-height="1200" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Sometimes they study us by trying part of our lifestyle, such as sleeping on a bed with their head on a pillow. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Peruvian_cat.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/d/de/Peruvian_cat.jpg/90px-Peruvian_cat.jpg" decoding="async" width="90" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/d/de/Peruvian_cat.jpg/135px-Peruvian_cat.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/d/de/Peruvian_cat.jpg/180px-Peruvian_cat.jpg 2x" data-file-width="240" data-file-height="320" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>God endowed some cats with largely offensive weapon of spitting </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Oscar_wildcat.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/8/8e/Oscar_wildcat.jpg/120px-Oscar_wildcat.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/8/8e/Oscar_wildcat.jpg/180px-Oscar_wildcat.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/8/8e/Oscar_wildcat.jpg/240px-Oscar_wildcat.jpg 2x" data-file-width="640" data-file-height="480" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Oscar Wildcat, Maine Coon cat </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Garfield.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/f/f2/Garfield.jpg/120px-Garfield.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/f/f2/Garfield.jpg/180px-Garfield.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/f/f2/Garfield.jpg/240px-Garfield.jpg 2x" data-file-width="4000" data-file-height="3000" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>This cat can <font color="green">teleport</font> </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:26px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Socks_cat_1.JPG" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/7/73/Socks_cat_1.JPG/120px-Socks_cat_1.JPG" decoding="async" width="120" height="98" srcset="/w/images/thumb/7/73/Socks_cat_1.JPG/180px-Socks_cat_1.JPG 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/7/73/Socks_cat_1.JPG/240px-Socks_cat_1.JPG 2x" data-file-width="368" data-file-height="300" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Meet the purrrresident. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:16.5px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Atheist_cat.jpeg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/4/48/Atheist_cat.jpeg/120px-Atheist_cat.jpeg" decoding="async" width="120" height="117" srcset="/w/images/thumb/4/48/Atheist_cat.jpeg/180px-Atheist_cat.jpeg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/4/48/Atheist_cat.jpeg/240px-Atheist_cat.jpeg 2x" data-file-width="400" data-file-height="389" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>An apt lolcat </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:18.5px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:CleoHatSmall.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/4/46/CleoHatSmall.jpg/120px-CleoHatSmall.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="113" srcset="/w/images/thumb/4/46/CleoHatSmall.jpg/180px-CleoHatSmall.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/4/46/CleoHatSmall.jpg/240px-CleoHatSmall.jpg 2x" data-file-width="738" data-file-height="698" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Cat in a Hat </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Erasmus_Aloysius_Runcible,_gentleman,_scholar_and_cat.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/c/c7/Erasmus_Aloysius_Runcible%2C_gentleman%2C_scholar_and_cat.jpg/120px-Erasmus_Aloysius_Runcible%2C_gentleman%2C_scholar_and_cat.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/c/c7/Erasmus_Aloysius_Runcible%2C_gentleman%2C_scholar_and_cat.jpg/180px-Erasmus_Aloysius_Runcible%2C_gentleman%2C_scholar_and_cat.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/c/c7/Erasmus_Aloysius_Runcible%2C_gentleman%2C_scholar_and_cat.jpg/240px-Erasmus_Aloysius_Runcible%2C_gentleman%2C_scholar_and_cat.jpg 2x" data-file-width="1408" data-file-height="1056" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Erasmus Aloysius Runcible, gentleman, scholar and cat </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Cato2.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/8/87/Cato2.jpg/94px-Cato2.jpg" decoding="async" width="94" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/8/87/Cato2.jpg/141px-Cato2.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/8/87/Cato2.jpg/188px-Cato2.jpg 2x" data-file-width="227" data-file-height="289" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Kitteh </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:33px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Larry_the_Cat_(cropped).jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0d/Larry_the_Cat_%28cropped%29.jpg/120px-Larry_the_Cat_%28cropped%29.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="84" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0d/Larry_the_Cat_%28cropped%29.jpg/250px-Larry_the_Cat_%28cropped%29.jpg 1.5x" data-file-width="3715" data-file-height="2612" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Larry, Chief Mouser of the <a href="/wiki/United_Kingdom" title="United Kingdom">United Kingdom</a> </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Fat_black_cat.JPG" class="image"><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/a/a7/Fat_black_cat.JPG/120px-Fat_black_cat.JPG" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/a/a7/Fat_black_cat.JPG/180px-Fat_black_cat.JPG 1.5x, https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/a/a7/Fat_black_cat.JPG/240px-Fat_black_cat.JPG 2x" data-file-width="640" data-file-height="480" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Black cat </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Posing_cat.JPG" class="image"><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/1/19/Posing_cat.JPG/120px-Posing_cat.JPG" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/1/19/Posing_cat.JPG/250px-Posing_cat.JPG 1.5x" data-file-width="640" data-file-height="480" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Orange cat </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:EirasPussy.jpeg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/f/fe/EirasPussy.jpeg/76px-EirasPussy.jpeg" decoding="async" width="76" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/f/fe/EirasPussy.jpeg/114px-EirasPussy.jpeg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/f/fe/EirasPussy.jpeg/152px-EirasPussy.jpeg 2x" data-file-width="245" data-file-height="387" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Cats think you're stupid </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:CharlieParker.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/b/bb/CharlieParker.jpg/120px-CharlieParker.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/b/bb/CharlieParker.jpg/180px-CharlieParker.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/b/bb/CharlieParker.jpg/240px-CharlieParker.jpg 2x" data-file-width="640" data-file-height="640" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>I want to ride your bicycle, I want to ride your bike! </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:PsychoCat.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/a/a7/PsychoCat.jpg/90px-PsychoCat.jpg" decoding="async" width="90" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/a/a7/PsychoCat.jpg/135px-PsychoCat.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/a/a7/PsychoCat.jpg/180px-PsychoCat.jpg 2x" data-file-width="2448" data-file-height="3264" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Temujin forming his diabolical master plan to enslave humanity. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:36px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Leopard.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/a/ae/Leopard.jpg/120px-Leopard.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="78" srcset="/w/images/thumb/a/ae/Leopard.jpg/180px-Leopard.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/a/ae/Leopard.jpg/240px-Leopard.jpg 2x" data-file-width="521" data-file-height="340" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>What your kitty-cat would be if it were the size of a large dog. Do not approach! </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Bob.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/0/04/Bob.jpg/90px-Bob.jpg" decoding="async" width="90" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/0/04/Bob.jpg/135px-Bob.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/0/04/Bob.jpg/180px-Bob.jpg 2x" data-file-width="1536" data-file-height="2048" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Bob. Only three months old, but already the size of an adult cat. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:41px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Jinxy.jpeg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/e/eb/Jinxy.jpeg/120px-Jinxy.jpeg" decoding="async" width="120" height="68" srcset="/w/images/thumb/e/eb/Jinxy.jpeg/180px-Jinxy.jpeg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/e/eb/Jinxy.jpeg/240px-Jinxy.jpeg 2x" data-file-width="366" data-file-height="206" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Jinxy screwing around atop of a door. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30.5px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:BOBCAT_(lynx_rufus)_(3-11-06)_canet_road,_morro_bay,_slo_co,_ca_-1_(569845738).jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/db/BOBCAT_%28lynx_rufus%29_%283-11-06%29_canet_road%2C_morro_bay%2C_slo_co%2C_ca_-1_%28569845738%29.jpg/120px-BOBCAT_%28lynx_rufus%29_%283-11-06%29_canet_road%2C_morro_bay%2C_slo_co%2C_ca_-1_%28569845738%29.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="89" srcset="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/db/BOBCAT_%28lynx_rufus%29_%283-11-06%29_canet_road%2C_morro_bay%2C_slo_co%2C_ca_-1_%28569845738%29.jpg/250px-BOBCAT_%28lynx_rufus%29_%283-11-06%29_canet_road%2C_morro_bay%2C_slo_co%2C_ca_-1_%28569845738%29.jpg 1.5x" data-file-width="650" data-file-height="480" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Bobcat. Here kitty kitty! </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Kzin.jpeg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/8/88/Kzin.jpeg/120px-Kzin.jpeg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/8/88/Kzin.jpeg/180px-Kzin.jpeg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/8/88/Kzin.jpeg/240px-Kzin.jpeg 2x" data-file-width="640" data-file-height="480" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Kzin does not like you (or rather did not). </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Bengal_Cat_(Fia).jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/d/df/Bengal_Cat_%28Fia%29.jpg/120px-Bengal_Cat_%28Fia%29.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/d/df/Bengal_Cat_%28Fia%29.jpg/180px-Bengal_Cat_%28Fia%29.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/d/df/Bengal_Cat_%28Fia%29.jpg/240px-Bengal_Cat_%28Fia%29.jpg 2x" data-file-width="500" data-file-height="375" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Smol. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:21.5px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Mr-peebles-smallest-cat.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/6/64/Mr-peebles-smallest-cat.jpg/120px-Mr-peebles-smallest-cat.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="107" srcset="/w/images/thumb/6/64/Mr-peebles-smallest-cat.jpg/180px-Mr-peebles-smallest-cat.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/6/64/Mr-peebles-smallest-cat.jpg/240px-Mr-peebles-smallest-cat.jpg 2x" data-file-width="624" data-file-height="555" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Also small. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:41px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Soren_04072021.jpg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/f/fa/Soren_04072021.jpg/120px-Soren_04072021.jpg" decoding="async" width="120" height="68" srcset="/w/images/thumb/f/fa/Soren_04072021.jpg/180px-Soren_04072021.jpg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/f/fa/Soren_04072021.jpg/240px-Soren_04072021.jpg 2x" data-file-width="4608" data-file-height="2592" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Don't mess with Søren, he'll chew your ethernet! </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:15px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:AngelInCatTree.jpeg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/f/ff/AngelInCatTree.jpeg/90px-AngelInCatTree.jpeg" decoding="async" width="90" height="120" srcset="/w/images/thumb/f/ff/AngelInCatTree.jpeg/135px-AngelInCatTree.jpeg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/f/ff/AngelInCatTree.jpeg/180px-AngelInCatTree.jpeg 2x" data-file-width="3024" data-file-height="4032" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Angel, appearing to set a trap. She actually wants head AND tummy scritches. </p> </div> </div></li> <li class="gallerybox" style="width: 155px"><div style="width: 155px"> <div class="thumb" style="width: 150px;"><div style="margin:30px auto;"><a href="/wiki/File:Bamby.jpeg" class="image"><img alt="" src="/w/images/thumb/8/80/Bamby.jpeg/120px-Bamby.jpeg" decoding="async" width="120" height="90" srcset="/w/images/thumb/8/80/Bamby.jpeg/180px-Bamby.jpeg 1.5x, /w/images/thumb/8/80/Bamby.jpeg/240px-Bamby.jpeg 2x" data-file-width="4032" data-file-height="3024" /></a></div></div> <div class="gallerytext"> <p>Bamby. Wook at her wittle face! </p> </div> </div></li> </ul> </center> <h2><span class="mw-headline" id="Purrrversity">Purrrversity</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=5" title="Edit section: Purrrversity">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h2> <table width="100%"> <tbody><tr valign="top"> <td width="25%"> <dl><dd><dl><dd><dl><dd><b>Stray Cat</b></dd></dl></dd> <dd><i>by Francis Witham</i></dd></dl></dd> <dd>Oh, what unhappy twist of fate</dd> <dd>Has brought you homeless to my gate?</dd> <dd>The gate where once another stood</dd> <dd>To beg for shelter, warmth, and food</dd> <dd>For from that day I ceased to be</dd> <dd>The master of my destiny.</dd> <dd> </dd> <dd>While he, with purr and velvet paw</dd> <dd>Became within my house the law.</dd> <dd>He scratched the furniture and shed</dd> <dd>And claimed the middle of my bed.</dd> <dd> </dd> <dd>He ruled in arrogance and pride</dd> <dd>And broke my heart the day he died.</dd> <dd>So if you really think, oh Cat,</dd> <dd>I'd willingly relive all that</dd> <dd>Because you come forlorn and thin</dd> <dd>Well...don't just stand there...Come on in!</dd></dl> </td> <td width="25%"> <dl><dd><b>There Once Were Two Cats Of Kilkenny</b></dd></dl> <dl><dd><i>Traditional</i></dd></dl> <dl><dd>There once were two cats of Kilkenny,</dd> <dd>Each thought there was one cat too many;</dd> <dd> </dd> <dd>So they fought and they fit,</dd> <dd>And they scratched and they bit,</dd> <dd> </dd> <dd>Till excepting their nails</dd> <dd>And the tips of their tails</dd> <dd> </dd> <dd>Instead of two cats</dd> <dd>There weren't any.</dd> <dd> </dd></dl> </td> <td width="25%"> <dl><dd><dl><dd><dl><dd><b>Cat</b></dd></dl></dd></dl></dd></dl> <dl><dd><i>by J. R. R. Tolkien</i></dd></dl> <dl><dd>The fat cat on the mat</dd> <dd>may seem to dream</dd> <dd>of nice mice that suffice</dd> <dd>for him, or cream;</dd> <dd>but he free, maybe,</dd> <dd>walks in thought</dd> <dd>unbowed, proud, where loud</dd> <dd>roared and fought</dd> <dd>his kin, lean and slim,</dd> <dd>or deep in den</dd> <dd>in the East feasted on beasts</dd> <dd>and tender men.</dd> <dd>The giant lion with iron</dd> <dd>claw in paw,</dd> <dd>and huge ruthless tooth</dd> <dd>in gory jaw;</dd> <dd>the pard dark-starred,</dd> <dd>fleet upon feet,</dd> <dd>that oft soft from aloft</dd> <dd>leaps upon his meat</dd> <dd>where woods loom in gloom —</dd> <dd>far now they be,</dd> <dd>fierce and free,</dd> <dd>and tamed is he;</dd> <dd>but fat cat on the mat</dd> <dd>kept as a pet</dd> <dd>he does not forget.</dd></dl> </td> <td width="25%"> <dl><dd><dl><dd><dl><dd><b>The Naming of Cats</b></dd></dl></dd></dl></dd></dl> <dl><dd><dl><dd><dl><dd><dl><dd><i>by T.S. Eliot</i></dd></dl></dd></dl></dd></dl></dd></dl> <dl><dd>The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,</dd> <dd>It isn't just one of your holiday games;</dd> <dd>You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter</dd> <dd>When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.</dd> <dd>First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,</dd> <dd>Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,</dd> <dd>Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey—</dd> <dd>All of them sensible everyday names.</dd> <dd>There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,</dd> <dd>Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:</dd> <dd>Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter—</dd> <dd>But all of them sensible everyday names.</dd> <dd>But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,</dd> <dd>A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,</dd> <dd>Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,</dd> <dd>Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?</dd> <dd>Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,</dd> <dd>Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,</dd> <dd>Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum-</dd> <dd>Names that never belong to more than one cat.</dd> <dd>But above and beyond there's still one name left over,</dd> <dd>And that is the name that you never will guess;</dd> <dd>The name that no human research can discover—</dd> <dd>But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.</dd> <dd>When you notice a cat in profound meditation,</dd> <dd>The reason, I tell you, is always the same:</dd> <dd>His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation</dd> <dd>Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:</dd> <dd>His ineffable effable</dd> <dd>Effanineffable</dd> <dd>Deep and inscrutable singular Name.</dd></dl> </td></tr></tbody></table> <p>"If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember." <small><b>— <a href="/wiki/Terry_Pratchett" title="Terry Pratchett">Terry Pratchett</a> (<i>Lords and Ladies</i>)</b></small> </p><p>"And though you are not sentient and do not comprehend, I nonetheless consider you a true and valued friend." <small><b>— Data (<i><a href="/wiki/Star_Trek" title="Star Trek">Star Trek</a>: The Next Generation</i>)<sup id="cite_ref-21" class="reference"><a href="#cite_note-21">[20]</a></sup></b></small> </p><p>"Cat? Cat! Cat! It's a cat!" <small><b>— Dormouse (<i>Alice in Wonderland</i>)</b></small> </p> <h2><span class="mw-headline" id="See_also">See also</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=6" title="Edit section: See also">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h2> <ul><li><a href="/wiki/Fun:Buttered_cat_theory" title="Fun:Buttered cat theory">Fun:Buttered cat theory</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Cat_food" title="Cat food">Cat food</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Ferret" class="mw-redirect" title="Ferret">Ferret</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Schr%C3%B6dinger%27s_cat" title="Schrödinger's cat">Schrödinger's cat</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Goat" title="Goat">Goat</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Cunt" title="Cunt">Pussy</a></li></ul> <h2><span id="Don't_see_also"></span><span class="mw-headline" id="Don.27t_see_also">Don't see also</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=7" title="Edit section: Don't see also">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h2> <ul><li><a href="/wiki/Fun:Mowse" title="Fun:Mowse">Mouse</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Dog" class="mw-redirect" title="Dog">Dog</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Fun:Long-eared_jerboa" title="Fun:Long-eared jerboa">Long-eared Jerboa</a></li> <li><a href="/wiki/Fun:Fox" title="Fun:Fox">Fox</a></li></ul> <h2><span class="mw-headline" id="External_links">External links</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=8" title="Edit section: External links">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h2> <ul><li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.icanhascheezburger.com">I Can Has Cheezburger?</a> - Largely amusing cats of lol.</li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.roflcat.com/">ROFL Cat</a> - Has less junk on the side than Cheezburger.</li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://lovemeow.com/">Love Meow</a> - Home of cat addicts.</li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://imgur.com/a/K4wsg">Famous paintings, but with cats</a></li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://archive.is/eXlLX">Guidelines for cats</a></li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/mugumogu/">Meet Maru.</a></li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.kongregate.com/games/ArmorGames/sushi-cat?acomplete=sushi+cat">Sushi Cat</a></li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9QwK5EHSmg&feature=player_embedded">How to bathe a cat.</a> (<a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PiDHXu5THj0">more realistic</a>)</li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://theoatmeal.com/misc/frame/cat_kill">How you can tell if your cat wants to kill you...</a></li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.youtube.com/user/HenriLeChatNoir?feature=watch">Enjoy your feline ennui.</a></li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/tourists-warned-after-french-woman-and-her-dog-are-attacked-by-gang-of-six-feral-cats-8733229.html">Just remember that as bad as this is, a gang of six feral dogs would have done much more damage.</a></li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://plus.google.com/communities/104255429474285450449">Google+ community for cat-lovers</a></li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M780jEAsNb8">Fluffy's Master Plan for World Domination</a> by The Bobs</li> <li><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.kittenwar.com/">Kitten War</a></li></ul> <h2><span class="mw-headline" id="Notes">Notes</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=9" title="Edit section: Notes">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h2> <div class="references-small" style="font-size:90%;"> <div class="mw-references-wrap"><ol class="references"> <li id="cite_note-9"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-9">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text">Or, two <a href="/wiki/Young_earth_creationism" class="mw-redirect" title="Young earth creationism">young earths</a> ago.</span> </li> </ol></div></div> <h2><span class="mw-headline" id="References">References</span><span class="mw-editsection"><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">[</span><a href="/w/index.php?title=Fun:Cat&action=edit&section=10" title="Edit section: References">edit</a><span class="mw-editsection-bracket">]</span></span></h2> <div class="references-small" style="-moz-column-count:2; -webkit-column-count:2; column-count:2; font-size:90%;"> <div class="mw-references-wrap mw-references-columns"><ol class="references"> <li id="cite_note-1"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-1">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://twitter.com/LettersOfNote/status/380677532699222017">Letters of Note</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-2"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-2">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"> <a rel="nofollow" class="external free" href="https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tLhepbmpsUI">https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tLhepbmpsUI</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-3"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-3">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text">"<a href="/wiki/Bullshit" title="Bullshit">Bullshit</a>, mouse doesn't see it that way." - <a href="/wiki/George_Carlin" title="George Carlin">George Carlin</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-4"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-4">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text">Nuwer, R. (Janurary 29, 2013). <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/feral-cats-kill-billions-of-small-critters-each-year-7814590/">Feral Cats Kill Billions of Small Critters Each Year</a>. <i>Smithsonian</i>. Retrieved May 11, 2018.</span> </li> <li id="cite_note-5"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-5">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text">Stone, M. (September 19, 2016). <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://gizmodo.com/feral-cats-are-an-ecological-disaster-1786809713">Feral Cats Are an Ecological Disaster</a> <i>Gizmodo</i>. Retrieved May 29, 2018.</span> </li> <li id="cite_note-6"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-6">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external free" href="https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/21490-owners-of-dogs-will-have-noticed-that-if-you-provide">https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/21490-owners-of-dogs-will-have-noticed-that-if-you-provide</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-7"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-7">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text">Personal experience, which I am prepared to swear to. - <a href="/wiki/User:SusanG" title="User:SusanG">Susan (bloodyface) Garlick</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-8"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-8">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://youtu.be/3NHKEFyY_-c?si=oDlPxbcBICPWOGrB">Cute kitten reacts to baby chickens</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-10"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-10">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text">"Why Do Cats Hang Around Us?" <i><a href="/wiki/Washington_Post" class="mw-redirect" title="Washington Post">Washington Post</a></i>, article available <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/06/28/AR2007062802343_2.html">here</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-11"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-11">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"> Vigne, J.D.; Evin, A.; Cucchi, T.; Dai, L.; Yu, C.; Hu, S.; Soulages, N.; Wang, W.; Sun, Z.; Gao, J.; Dobney, K.; Yuan, J. (2016). "Earliest "Domestic" Cats in China Identified as Leopard Cat (Prionailurus bengalensis)". PLOS ONE. 11 (1): e0147295. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0147295. PMC 4723238 Freely accessible. PMID 26799955.</span> </li> <li id="cite_note-12"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-12">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external free" href="http://www.usatoday.com/news/offbeat/2008-01-23-cat_N.htm">http://www.usatoday.com/news/offbeat/2008-01-23-cat_N.htm</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-13"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-13">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="https://slate.com/human-interest/2015/08/why-are-cats-attracted-to-people-who-dont-like-them.html">Why are cats attracted to people who don't like them?</a> <i>Slate.</i></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-14"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-14">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text">See the <a href="/wiki/Wikipedia" title="Wikipedia">Wikipedia</a> article on <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_animals_in_the_Bible#C" class="extiw" title="wp:List of animals in the Bible" rel="nofollow">List of animals in the Bible</a>.</span> </li> <li id="cite_note-15"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-15">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external autonumber" href="https://witcher.fandom.com/wiki/Cat_(creature)">[1]</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-16"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-16">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.obit-mag.com/articles/nine-lives">Socks done gone</a> Awww! :(</span> </li> <li id="cite_note-17"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-17">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text">See the <a href="/wiki/Wikipedia" title="Wikipedia">Wikipedia</a> article on <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humphrey_(cat)" class="extiw" title="wp:Humphrey (cat)" rel="nofollow">Humphrey (cat)</a>.</span> </li> <li id="cite_note-18"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-18">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external free" href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Duqvb-IRv9c">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Duqvb-IRv9c</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-19"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-19">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.improbable.com/ig/winners/#ig2017">The 2017 Ig Nobel Prize Winners</a></span> </li> <li id="cite_note-20"><span class="mw-cite-backlink"><a href="#cite_ref-20">↑</a></span> <span class="reference-text"><a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://www.rheology.org/sor/publications/rheology_b/RB2014Jul.pdf">On the Rheology of Cats</a> by M. A. 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