CINXE.COM

<!doctype html><html lang="en"><head><title data-rh="true">Fond Memories of a Gentle Soul. Fond memories of a gentle soul | by LaShell Tinder | Middle-Pause | Nov, 2024 | Medium</title><meta data-rh="true" charset="utf-8"/><meta data-rh="true" name="viewport" content="width=device-width,minimum-scale=1,initial-scale=1,maximum-scale=1"/><meta data-rh="true" name="theme-color" content="#000000"/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:app:name:iphone" content="Medium"/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:app:id:iphone" content="828256236"/><meta data-rh="true" property="al:ios:app_name" content="Medium"/><meta data-rh="true" property="al:ios:app_store_id" content="828256236"/><meta data-rh="true" property="al:android:package" content="com.medium.reader"/><meta data-rh="true" property="fb:app_id" content="542599432471018"/><meta data-rh="true" property="og:site_name" content="Medium"/><meta data-rh="true" property="og:type" content="article"/><meta data-rh="true" property="article:published_time" content="2024-11-27T21:02:08.102Z"/><meta data-rh="true" name="title" content="Fond Memories of a Gentle Soul. Fond memories of a gentle soul | by LaShell Tinder | Middle-Pause | Nov, 2024 | Medium"/><meta data-rh="true" property="og:title" content="Redemption Comes Unexpectedly"/><meta data-rh="true" property="al:android:url" content="medium://p/cef7bf43c056"/><meta data-rh="true" property="al:ios:url" content="medium://p/cef7bf43c056"/><meta data-rh="true" property="al:android:app_name" content="Medium"/><meta data-rh="true" name="description" content="At twenty-three, I had an Uncle Sam shotgun wedding to a foreign national. We were in love but sped up the process so that he could seek employment. I remember regularly feeling overwhelmed because I…"/><meta data-rh="true" property="og:description" content="Fond memories of a gentle soul"/><meta data-rh="true" property="og:url" content="https://medium.com/middle-pause/redemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056"/><meta data-rh="true" property="al:web:url" content="https://medium.com/middle-pause/redemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056"/><meta data-rh="true" property="og:image" content="https://miro.medium.com/v2/da:true/resize:fit:1200/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP"/><meta data-rh="true" property="og:image:alt" content="on the left is a sculptured head of Carolina, the heroine of the story. on the right is a photo of her holding a teddy bear. She’s an Argentinean woman in her 70s."/><meta data-rh="true" property="article:author" content="https://medium.com/@lashelltinder"/><meta data-rh="true" name="author" content="LaShell Tinder"/><meta data-rh="true" name="robots" content="index,noarchive,follow,max-image-preview:large"/><meta data-rh="true" name="referrer" content="unsafe-url"/><meta data-rh="true" property="twitter:title" content="Redemption Comes Unexpectedly"/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:site" content="@debbiewalker59"/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:app:url:iphone" content="medium://p/cef7bf43c056"/><meta data-rh="true" property="twitter:description" content="Fond memories of a gentle soul"/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:image:src" content="https://miro.medium.com/v2/da:true/resize:fit:1200/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP"/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:image:alt" content="on the left is a sculptured head of Carolina, the heroine of the story. on the right is a photo of her holding a teddy bear. She’s an Argentinean woman in her 70s."/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:card" content="summary_large_image"/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:label1" content="Reading time"/><meta data-rh="true" name="twitter:data1" content="3 min read"/><link data-rh="true" rel="icon" href="https://miro.medium.com/v2/5d8de952517e8160e40ef9841c781cdc14a5db313057fa3c3de41c6f5b494b19"/><link data-rh="true" rel="search" type="application/opensearchdescription+xml" title="Medium" href="/osd.xml"/><link data-rh="true" rel="apple-touch-icon" sizes="152x152" href="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:304:304/10fd5c419ac61637245384e7099e131627900034828f4f386bdaa47a74eae156"/><link data-rh="true" rel="apple-touch-icon" sizes="120x120" href="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:240:240/10fd5c419ac61637245384e7099e131627900034828f4f386bdaa47a74eae156"/><link data-rh="true" rel="apple-touch-icon" sizes="76x76" href="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:152:152/10fd5c419ac61637245384e7099e131627900034828f4f386bdaa47a74eae156"/><link data-rh="true" rel="apple-touch-icon" sizes="60x60" href="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:120:120/10fd5c419ac61637245384e7099e131627900034828f4f386bdaa47a74eae156"/><link data-rh="true" rel="mask-icon" href="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:1000:1000/7*GAOKVe--MXbEJmV9230oOQ.png" color="#171717"/><link data-rh="true" rel="preconnect" href="https://glyph.medium.com" crossOrigin=""/><link data-rh="true" id="glyph_preload_link" rel="preload" as="style" type="text/css" href="https://glyph.medium.com/css/unbound.css"/><link data-rh="true" id="glyph_link" rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="https://glyph.medium.com/css/unbound.css"/><link data-rh="true" rel="author" href="https://medium.com/@lashelltinder"/><link data-rh="true" rel="canonical" href="https://medium.com/middle-pause/redemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056"/><link data-rh="true" rel="alternate" href="android-app://com.medium.reader/https/medium.com/p/cef7bf43c056"/><script data-rh="true" type="application/ld+json">{"@context":"http:\u002F\u002Fschema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","image":["https:\u002F\u002Fmiro.medium.com\u002Fv2\u002Fda:true\u002Fresize:fit:1200\u002F0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP"],"url":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002Fmiddle-pause\u002Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056","dateCreated":"2024-11-27T21:02:08.102Z","datePublished":"2024-11-27T21:02:08.102Z","dateModified":"2024-11-28T02:50:43.098Z","headline":"Fond Memories of a Gentle Soul - Middle-Pause - Medium","name":"Fond Memories of a Gentle Soul - Middle-Pause - Medium","description":"At twenty-three, I had an Uncle Sam shotgun wedding to a foreign national. We were in love but sped up the process so that he could seek employment. I remember regularly feeling overwhelmed because I…","identifier":"cef7bf43c056","author":{"@type":"Person","name":"LaShell Tinder","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002F@lashelltinder"},"creator":["LaShell Tinder"],"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Middle-Pause","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002Fmiddle-pause","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","width":60,"height":60,"url":"https:\u002F\u002Fmiro.medium.com\u002Fv2\u002Fresize:fit:120\u002F1*IaIWpziUw2TloxAUDM2HLg.png"}},"mainEntityOfPage":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002Fmiddle-pause\u002Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056"}</script><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="STATIC">html{box-sizing:border-box;-webkit-text-size-adjust:100%}*, *:before, *:after{box-sizing:inherit}body{margin:0;padding:0;text-rendering:optimizeLegibility;-webkit-font-smoothing:antialiased;color:rgba(0,0,0,0.8);position:relative;min-height:100vh}h1, h2, h3, h4, h5, h6, dl, dd, ol, ul, menu, figure, blockquote, p, pre, form{margin:0}menu, ol, ul{padding:0;list-style:none;list-style-image:none}main{display:block}a{color:inherit;text-decoration:none}a, button, input{-webkit-tap-highlight-color:transparent}img, svg{vertical-align:middle}button{background:transparent;overflow:visible}button, input, optgroup, select, textarea{margin:0}:root{--reach-tabs:1;--reach-menu-button:1}#speechify-root{font-family:Sohne, sans-serif}div[data-popper-reference-hidden="true"]{visibility:hidden;pointer-events:none}.grecaptcha-badge{visibility:hidden} /*XCode style (c) Angel Garcia <angelgarcia.mail@gmail.com>*/.hljs {background: #fff;color: black; }/* Gray DOCTYPE selectors like WebKit */ .xml .hljs-meta {color: #c0c0c0; }.hljs-comment, .hljs-quote {color: #007400; }.hljs-tag, .hljs-attribute, .hljs-keyword, .hljs-selector-tag, .hljs-literal, .hljs-name {color: #aa0d91; }.hljs-variable, .hljs-template-variable {color: #3F6E74; }.hljs-code, .hljs-string, .hljs-meta .hljs-string {color: #c41a16; }.hljs-regexp, .hljs-link {color: #0E0EFF; }.hljs-title, .hljs-symbol, .hljs-bullet, .hljs-number {color: #1c00cf; }.hljs-section, .hljs-meta {color: #643820; }.hljs-title.class_, .hljs-class .hljs-title, .hljs-type, .hljs-built_in, .hljs-params {color: #5c2699; }.hljs-attr {color: #836C28; }.hljs-subst {color: #000; }.hljs-formula {background-color: #eee;font-style: italic; }.hljs-addition {background-color: #baeeba; }.hljs-deletion {background-color: #ffc8bd; }.hljs-selector-id, .hljs-selector-class {color: #9b703f; }.hljs-doctag, .hljs-strong {font-weight: bold; }.hljs-emphasis {font-style: italic; } </style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="KEYFRAME">@-webkit-keyframes k1{0%{opacity:0.8}50%{opacity:0.5}100%{opacity:0.8}}@-moz-keyframes k1{0%{opacity:0.8}50%{opacity:0.5}100%{opacity:0.8}}@keyframes k1{0%{opacity:0.8}50%{opacity:0.5}100%{opacity:0.8}}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE">.a{font-family:medium-content-sans-serif-font, -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Oxygen, Ubuntu, Cantarell, "Open Sans", "Helvetica Neue", sans-serif}.b{font-weight:400}.c{background-color:rgba(255, 255, 255, 1)}.l{display:block}.m{position:sticky}.n{top:0}.o{z-index:500}.p{padding:0 24px}.q{align-items:center}.r{border-bottom:solid 1px #F2F2F2}.y{height:41px}.z{line-height:20px}.ab{display:flex}.ac{height:57px}.ae{flex:1 0 auto}.af{color:inherit}.ag{fill:inherit}.ah{font-size:inherit}.ai{border:inherit}.aj{font-family:inherit}.ak{letter-spacing:inherit}.al{font-weight:inherit}.am{padding:0}.an{margin:0}.ao{cursor:pointer}.ap:disabled{cursor:not-allowed}.aq:disabled{color:#6B6B6B}.ar:disabled{fill:#6B6B6B}.au{width:auto}.av path{fill:#242424}.aw{height:25px}.ax{margin-left:16px}.ay{border:none}.az{border-radius:20px}.ba{width:240px}.bb{background:#F9F9F9}.bc path{fill:#6B6B6B}.be{outline:none}.bf{font-family:sohne, "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif}.bg{font-size:14px}.bh{width:100%}.bi{padding:10px 20px 10px 0}.bj{background-color:transparent}.bk{color:#242424}.bl::placeholder{color:#6B6B6B}.bm{display:inline-block}.bn{margin-left:12px}.bo{margin-right:12px}.bp{border-radius:4px}.bq{margin-left:24px}.br{height:24px}.bx{background-color:#F9F9F9}.by{border-radius:50%}.bz{height:32px}.ca{width:32px}.cb{justify-content:center}.ch{max-width:680px}.ci{min-width:0}.cj{animation:k1 1.2s ease-in-out infinite}.ck{height:100vh}.cl{margin-bottom:16px}.cm{margin-top:48px}.cn{align-items:flex-start}.co{flex-direction:column}.cp{justify-content:space-between}.cq{margin-bottom:24px}.cw{width:80%}.cx{background-color:#F2F2F2}.dd{height:44px}.de{width:44px}.df{margin:auto 0}.dg{margin-bottom:4px}.dh{height:16px}.di{width:120px}.dj{width:80px}.dp{margin-bottom:8px}.dq{width:96%}.dr{width:98%}.ds{width:81%}.dt{margin-left:8px}.du{color:#6B6B6B}.dv{font-size:13px}.dw{height:100%}.ep{color:#FFFFFF}.eq{fill:#FFFFFF}.er{background:rgba(155, 130, 0, 1)}.es{border-color:rgba(155, 130, 0, 1)}.ew:disabled{cursor:inherit !important}.ex:disabled{opacity:0.3}.ey:disabled:hover{background:rgba(155, 130, 0, 1)}.ez:disabled:hover{border-color:rgba(155, 130, 0, 1)}.fa{border-radius:99em}.fb{border-width:1px}.fc{border-style:solid}.fd{box-sizing:border-box}.fe{text-decoration:none}.ff{text-align:center}.fi{margin-right:32px}.fj{position:relative}.fk{fill:#6B6B6B}.fn{background:transparent}.fo svg{margin-left:4px}.fp svg{fill:#6B6B6B}.fr{box-shadow:inset 0 0 0 1px rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.05)}.fs{position:absolute}.fz{margin:0 24px}.gd{background:rgba(255, 255, 255, 1)}.ge{border:1px solid #F2F2F2}.gf{box-shadow:0 1px 4px #F2F2F2}.gg{max-height:100vh}.gh{overflow-y:auto}.gi{left:0}.gj{top:calc(100vh + 100px)}.gk{bottom:calc(100vh + 100px)}.gl{width:10px}.gm{pointer-events:none}.gn{word-break:break-word}.go{word-wrap:break-word}.gp:after{display:block}.gq:after{content:""}.gr:after{clear:both}.gs{line-height:1.23}.gt{letter-spacing:0}.gu{font-style:normal}.gv{font-weight:700}.hq{margin-bottom:-0.27em}.hr{line-height:1.394}.im{align-items:baseline}.in{width:48px}.io{height:48px}.ip{border:2px solid rgba(255, 255, 255, 1)}.iq{z-index:0}.ir{box-shadow:none}.is{border:1px solid rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.05)}.it{margin-left:-12px}.iu{width:28px}.iv{height:28px}.iw{z-index:1}.ix{width:24px}.iy{margin-bottom:2px}.iz{flex-wrap:nowrap}.ja{font-size:16px}.jb{line-height:24px}.jd{margin:0 8px}.je{display:inline}.jf{color:rgba(155, 130, 0, 1)}.jg{fill:rgba(155, 130, 0, 1)}.jj{flex:0 0 auto}.jm{flex-wrap:wrap}.jp{white-space:pre-wrap}.jq{margin-right:4px}.jr{overflow:hidden}.js{max-height:20px}.jt{text-overflow:ellipsis}.ju{display:-webkit-box}.jv{-webkit-line-clamp:1}.jw{-webkit-box-orient:vertical}.jx{word-break:break-all}.jz{padding-left:8px}.ka{padding-right:8px}.lb> *{flex-shrink:0}.lc{overflow-x:scroll}.ld::-webkit-scrollbar{display:none}.le{scrollbar-width:none}.lf{-ms-overflow-style:none}.lg{width:74px}.lh{flex-direction:row}.li{z-index:2}.ll{-webkit-user-select:none}.lm{border:0}.ln{fill:rgba(117, 117, 117, 1)}.lq{outline:0}.lr{user-select:none}.ls> svg{pointer-events:none}.mb{cursor:progress}.mc{margin-left:4px}.md{margin-top:0px}.me{opacity:1}.mf{padding:4px 0}.mi{width:16px}.mk{display:inline-flex}.mq{max-width:100%}.mr{padding:8px 2px}.ms svg{color:#6B6B6B}.nj{margin-left:auto}.nk{margin-right:auto}.nl{max-width:1600px}.nr{clear:both}.nt{cursor:zoom-in}.nu{z-index:auto}.nw{height:auto}.nx{margin-top:10px}.ny{max-width:728px}.ob{line-height:1.58}.oc{letter-spacing:-0.004em}.od{font-family:source-serif-pro, Georgia, Cambria, "Times New Roman", Times, serif}.ow{margin-bottom:-0.46em}.ox{margin-top:32px}.oy{margin-bottom:14px}.oz{padding-top:24px}.pa{padding-bottom:10px}.pb{background-color:#000000}.pc{height:3px}.pd{width:3px}.pe{margin-right:20px}.pf{font-style:italic}.pg{margin-bottom:26px}.ph{margin-top:6px}.pi{margin-top:8px}.pj{margin-right:8px}.pk{padding:8px 16px}.pl{border-radius:100px}.pm{transition:background 300ms ease}.po{white-space:nowrap}.pp{border-top:none}.pv{height:52px}.pw{max-height:52px}.px{box-sizing:content-box}.py{position:static}.qa{max-width:155px}.ql{margin-bottom:48px}.qz{border-radius:2px}.rb{height:64px}.rc{width:64px}.rd{align-self:flex-end}.re{flex:1 1 auto}.rk{padding-right:4px}.rl{font-weight:500}.ry{margin-top:16px}.rz{color:rgba(255, 255, 255, 1)}.sa{fill:rgba(255, 255, 255, 1)}.sb{background:rgba(25, 25, 25, 1)}.sc{border-color:rgba(25, 25, 25, 1)}.sf:disabled{opacity:0.1}.sg:disabled:hover{background:rgba(25, 25, 25, 1)}.sh:disabled:hover{border-color:rgba(25, 25, 25, 1)}.si{height:0px}.sj{border-bottom:solid 1px #E5E5E5}.sk{margin-top:56px}.sl{margin-top:72px}.sm{padding:24px 0}.sn{margin-bottom:0px}.so{margin-right:16px}.as:hover:not(:disabled){color:rgba(25, 25, 25, 1)}.at:hover:not(:disabled){fill:rgba(25, 25, 25, 1)}.et:hover{background:rgba(132, 112, 0, 1)}.eu:hover{border-color:rgba(132, 112, 0, 1)}.ev:hover{cursor:pointer}.fl:hover{color:#242424}.fm:hover{fill:#242424}.fq:hover svg{fill:#242424}.ft:hover{background-color:rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.1)}.jc:hover{text-decoration:underline}.jh:hover:not(:disabled){color:rgba(132, 112, 0, 1)}.ji:hover:not(:disabled){fill:rgba(132, 112, 0, 1)}.lp:hover{fill:rgba(8, 8, 8, 1)}.mg:hover{fill:#000000}.mh:hover p{color:#000000}.mj:hover{color:#000000}.mt:hover svg{color:#000000}.pn:hover{background-color:#F2F2F2}.ra:hover{background-color:none}.sd:hover{background:#000000}.se:hover{border-color:#242424}.bd:focus-within path{fill:#242424}.lo:focus{fill:rgba(8, 8, 8, 1)}.mu:focus svg{color:#000000}.nv:focus{transform:scale(1.01)}.lt:active{border-style:none}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="all and (min-width: 1080px)">.d{display:none}.bw{width:64px}.cg{margin:0 64px}.cv{height:48px}.dc{margin-bottom:52px}.do{margin-bottom:48px}.ef{font-size:14px}.eg{line-height:20px}.em{font-size:13px}.eo{padding:5px 12px}.fh{display:flex}.fy{margin-bottom:68px}.gc{max-width:680px}.hm{font-size:42px}.hn{margin-top:1.19em}.ho{line-height:52px}.hp{letter-spacing:-0.011em}.ie{font-size:22px}.if{margin-top:0.92em}.ig{line-height:28px}.il{align-items:center}.kn{border-top:solid 1px #F2F2F2}.ko{border-bottom:solid 1px #F2F2F2}.kp{margin:32px 0 0}.kq{padding:3px 8px}.kz> *{margin-right:24px}.la> :last-child{margin-right:0}.ma{margin-top:0px}.mp{margin:0}.nq{margin-top:56px}.os{font-size:20px}.ot{margin-top:2.14em}.ou{line-height:32px}.ov{letter-spacing:-0.003em}.pu{margin-bottom:88px}.qf{display:inline-block}.qk{padding-top:72px}.qm{flex-direction:row}.qp{margin-bottom:0}.qq{margin-right:20px}.rf{max-width:500px}.rw{line-height:24px}.rx{letter-spacing:0}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="all and (max-width: 1079.98px)">.e{display:none}.lz{margin-top:0px}.nz{margin-left:auto}.oa{text-align:center}.qe{display:inline-block}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="all and (max-width: 903.98px)">.f{display:none}.ly{margin-top:0px}.qd{display:inline-block}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="all and (max-width: 727.98px)">.g{display:none}.lw{margin-top:0px}.lx{margin-right:0px}.qc{display:inline-block}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="all and (max-width: 551.98px)">.h{display:none}.s{display:flex}.t{justify-content:space-between}.bs{width:24px}.cc{margin:0 24px}.cr{height:40px}.cy{margin-bottom:44px}.dk{margin-bottom:32px}.dx{font-size:13px}.dy{line-height:20px}.eh{padding:0px 8px 1px}.fu{margin-bottom:4px}.gw{font-size:32px}.gx{margin-top:1.01em}.gy{line-height:38px}.gz{letter-spacing:-0.014em}.hs{font-size:18px}.ht{margin-top:0.79em}.hu{line-height:24px}.ih{align-items:flex-start}.jk{flex-direction:column}.jn{margin-bottom:2px}.kb{margin:24px -24px 0}.kc{padding:0}.kr> *{margin-right:8px}.ks> :last-child{margin-right:24px}.lj{margin-left:0px}.lu{margin-top:0px}.lv{margin-right:0px}.ml{margin:0}.mv{border:1px solid #F2F2F2}.mw{border-radius:99em}.mx{padding:0px 16px 0px 12px}.my{height:38px}.mz{align-items:center}.nb svg{margin-right:8px}.nm{margin-top:40px}.oe{margin-top:1.56em}.of{line-height:28px}.og{letter-spacing:-0.003em}.pq{margin-bottom:80px}.qb{display:inline-block}.qg{padding-top:48px}.qx{margin-bottom:20px}.qy{margin-right:0}.rj{max-width:100%}.rm{font-size:24px}.rn{line-height:30px}.ro{letter-spacing:-0.016em}.na:hover{border-color:#E5E5E5}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="all and (min-width: 904px) and (max-width: 1079.98px)">.i{display:none}.bv{width:64px}.cf{margin:0 64px}.cu{height:48px}.db{margin-bottom:52px}.dn{margin-bottom:48px}.ed{font-size:14px}.ee{line-height:20px}.ek{font-size:13px}.el{padding:5px 12px}.fg{display:flex}.fx{margin-bottom:68px}.gb{max-width:680px}.hi{font-size:42px}.hj{margin-top:1.19em}.hk{line-height:52px}.hl{letter-spacing:-0.011em}.ib{font-size:22px}.ic{margin-top:0.92em}.id{line-height:28px}.ik{align-items:center}.kj{border-top:solid 1px #F2F2F2}.kk{border-bottom:solid 1px #F2F2F2}.kl{margin:32px 0 0}.km{padding:3px 8px}.kx> *{margin-right:24px}.ky> :last-child{margin-right:0}.mo{margin:0}.np{margin-top:56px}.oo{font-size:20px}.op{margin-top:2.14em}.oq{line-height:32px}.or{letter-spacing:-0.003em}.pt{margin-bottom:88px}.qj{padding-top:72px}.qn{flex-direction:row}.qr{margin-bottom:0}.qs{margin-right:20px}.rg{max-width:500px}.ru{line-height:24px}.rv{letter-spacing:0}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="all and (min-width: 728px) and (max-width: 903.98px)">.j{display:none}.w{display:flex}.x{justify-content:space-between}.bu{width:64px}.ce{margin:0 48px}.ct{height:48px}.da{margin-bottom:52px}.dm{margin-bottom:48px}.eb{font-size:13px}.ec{line-height:20px}.ej{padding:0px 8px 1px}.fw{margin-bottom:68px}.ga{max-width:680px}.he{font-size:42px}.hf{margin-top:1.19em}.hg{line-height:52px}.hh{letter-spacing:-0.011em}.hy{font-size:22px}.hz{margin-top:0.92em}.ia{line-height:28px}.ij{align-items:center}.kf{border-top:solid 1px #F2F2F2}.kg{border-bottom:solid 1px #F2F2F2}.kh{margin:32px 0 0}.ki{padding:3px 8px}.kv> *{margin-right:24px}.kw> :last-child{margin-right:0}.mn{margin:0}.no{margin-top:56px}.ok{font-size:20px}.ol{margin-top:2.14em}.om{line-height:32px}.on{letter-spacing:-0.003em}.ps{margin-bottom:88px}.qi{padding-top:72px}.qo{flex-direction:row}.qt{margin-bottom:0}.qu{margin-right:20px}.rh{max-width:500px}.rs{line-height:24px}.rt{letter-spacing:0}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="all and (min-width: 552px) and (max-width: 727.98px)">.k{display:none}.u{display:flex}.v{justify-content:space-between}.bt{width:24px}.cd{margin:0 24px}.cs{height:40px}.cz{margin-bottom:44px}.dl{margin-bottom:32px}.dz{font-size:13px}.ea{line-height:20px}.ei{padding:0px 8px 1px}.fv{margin-bottom:4px}.ha{font-size:32px}.hb{margin-top:1.01em}.hc{line-height:38px}.hd{letter-spacing:-0.014em}.hv{font-size:18px}.hw{margin-top:0.79em}.hx{line-height:24px}.ii{align-items:flex-start}.jl{flex-direction:column}.jo{margin-bottom:2px}.kd{margin:24px 0 0}.ke{padding:0}.kt> *{margin-right:8px}.ku> :last-child{margin-right:8px}.lk{margin-left:0px}.mm{margin:0}.nc{border:1px solid #F2F2F2}.nd{border-radius:99em}.ne{padding:0px 16px 0px 12px}.nf{height:38px}.ng{align-items:center}.ni svg{margin-right:8px}.nn{margin-top:40px}.oh{margin-top:1.56em}.oi{line-height:28px}.oj{letter-spacing:-0.003em}.pr{margin-bottom:80px}.qh{padding-top:48px}.qv{margin-bottom:20px}.qw{margin-right:0}.ri{max-width:100%}.rp{font-size:24px}.rq{line-height:30px}.rr{letter-spacing:-0.016em}.nh:hover{border-color:#E5E5E5}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="print">.pz{display:none}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="(orientation: landscape) and (max-width: 903.98px)">.jy{max-height:none}</style><style type="text/css" data-fela-rehydration="508" data-fela-type="RULE" media="(prefers-reduced-motion: no-preference)">.ns{transition:transform 300ms cubic-bezier(0.2, 0, 0.2, 1)}</style></head><body><div id="root"><div class="a b c"><div class="d e f g h i j k"></div><script>document.domain = document.domain;</script><div class="l c"><div class="l m n o c"><div class="p q r s t u v w x i d y z"><a class="du ag dv bf ak b am an ao ap aq ar as at s u w i d q dw z" href="https://rsci.app.link/?%24canonical_url=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fp%2Fcef7bf43c056&%7Efeature=LoOpenInAppButton&%7Echannel=ShowPostUnderCollection&source=---top_nav_layout_nav----------------------------------" rel="noopener follow">Open in app<svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="10" height="10" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 10 10" class="dt"><path fill="currentColor" d="M.985 8.485a.375.375 0 1 0 .53.53zM8.75 1.25h.375A.375.375 0 0 0 8.75.875zM8.375 6.5a.375.375 0 1 0 .75 0zM3.5.875a.375.375 0 1 0 0 .75zm-1.985 8.14 7.5-7.5-.53-.53-7.5 7.5zm6.86-7.765V6.5h.75V1.25zM3.5 1.625h5.25v-.75H3.5z"></path></svg></a><div class="ab q"><p class="bf b dx dy dz ea eb ec ed ee ef eg du"><span><button class="bf b dx dy eh dz ea ei eb ec ej ek ee el em eg eo ep eq er es et eu ev ew ex ey ez fa fb fc fd bm fe ff" data-testid="headerSignUpButton">Sign up</button></span></p><div class="ax l"><p class="bf b dx dy dz ea eb ec ed ee ef eg du"><span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="headerSignInButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?operation=login&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056&source=post_page---top_nav_layout_nav-----------------------global_nav-----------">Sign in</a></span></p></div></div></div><div class="p q r ab ac"><div class="ab q ae"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at ab" aria-label="Homepage" data-testid="headerMediumLogo" rel="noopener follow" href="/?source=---top_nav_layout_nav----------------------------------"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="719" height="160" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 719 160" class="au av aw"><path fill="#242424" d="m174.104 9.734.215-.047V8.02H130.39L89.6 103.89 48.81 8.021H1.472v1.666l.212.047c8.018 1.81 12.09 4.509 12.09 14.242V137.93c0 9.734-4.087 12.433-12.106 14.243l-.212.047v1.671h32.118v-1.665l-.213-.048c-8.018-1.809-12.089-4.509-12.089-14.242V30.586l52.399 123.305h2.972l53.925-126.743V140.75c-.687 7.688-4.721 10.062-11.982 11.701l-.215.05v1.652h55.948v-1.652l-.215-.05c-7.269-1.639-11.4-4.013-12.087-11.701l-.037-116.774h.037c0-9.733 4.071-12.432 12.087-14.242m25.555 75.488c.915-20.474 8.268-35.252 20.606-35.507 3.806.063 6.998 1.312 9.479 3.714 5.272 5.118 7.751 15.812 7.368 31.793zm-.553 5.77h65.573v-.275c-.186-15.656-4.721-27.834-13.466-36.196-7.559-7.227-18.751-11.203-30.507-11.203h-.263c-6.101 0-13.584 1.48-18.909 4.16-6.061 2.807-11.407 7.003-15.855 12.511-7.161 8.874-11.499 20.866-12.554 34.343q-.05.606-.092 1.212a50 50 0 0 0-.065 1.151 85.807 85.807 0 0 0-.094 5.689c.71 30.524 17.198 54.917 46.483 54.917 25.705 0 40.675-18.791 44.407-44.013l-1.886-.664c-6.557 13.556-18.334 21.771-31.738 20.769-18.297-1.369-32.314-19.922-31.042-42.395m139.722 41.359c-2.151 5.101-6.639 7.908-12.653 7.908s-11.513-4.129-15.418-11.63c-4.197-8.053-6.405-19.436-6.405-32.92 0-28.067 8.729-46.22 22.24-46.22 5.657 0 10.111 2.807 12.236 7.704zm43.499 20.008c-8.019-1.897-12.089-4.722-12.089-14.951V1.309l-48.716 14.353v1.757l.299-.024c6.72-.543 11.278.386 13.925 2.83 2.072 1.915 3.082 4.853 3.082 8.987v18.66c-4.803-3.067-10.516-4.56-17.448-4.56-14.059 0-26.909 5.92-36.176 16.672-9.66 11.205-14.767 26.518-14.767 44.278-.003 31.72 15.612 53.039 38.851 53.039 13.595 0 24.533-7.449 29.54-20.013v16.865h43.711v-1.746zM424.1 19.819c0-9.904-7.468-17.374-17.375-17.374-9.859 0-17.573 7.632-17.573 17.374s7.721 17.374 17.573 17.374c9.907 0 17.375-7.47 17.375-17.374m11.499 132.546c-8.019-1.897-12.089-4.722-12.089-14.951h-.035V43.635l-43.714 12.551v1.705l.263.024c9.458.842 12.047 4.1 12.047 15.152v81.086h43.751v-1.746zm112.013 0c-8.018-1.897-12.089-4.722-12.089-14.951V43.635l-41.621 12.137v1.71l.246.026c7.733.813 9.967 4.257 9.967 15.36v59.279c-2.578 5.102-7.415 8.131-13.274 8.336-9.503 0-14.736-6.419-14.736-18.073V43.638l-43.714 12.55v1.703l.262.024c9.459.84 12.05 4.097 12.05 15.152v50.17a56.3 56.3 0 0 0 .91 10.444l.787 3.423c3.701 13.262 13.398 20.197 28.59 20.197 12.868 0 24.147-7.966 29.115-20.43v17.311h43.714v-1.747zm169.818 1.788v-1.749l-.213-.05c-8.7-2.006-12.089-5.789-12.089-13.49v-63.79c0-19.89-11.171-31.761-29.883-31.761-13.64 0-25.141 7.882-29.569 20.16-3.517-13.01-13.639-20.16-28.606-20.16-13.146 0-23.449 6.938-27.869 18.657V43.643L545.487 55.68v1.715l.263.024c9.345.829 12.047 4.181 12.047 14.95v81.784h40.787v-1.746l-.215-.053c-6.941-1.631-9.181-4.606-9.181-12.239V66.998c1.836-4.289 5.537-9.37 12.853-9.37 9.086 0 13.692 6.296 13.692 18.697v77.828h40.797v-1.746l-.215-.053c-6.94-1.631-9.18-4.606-9.18-12.239V75.066a42 42 0 0 0-.578-7.26c1.947-4.661 5.86-10.177 13.475-10.177 9.214 0 13.691 6.114 13.691 18.696v77.828z"></path></svg></a><div class="ax h"><div class="ab ay az ba bb q bc bd"><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false" aria-describedby="searchResults" aria-labelledby="searchResults"></div><div class="bn bo ab"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 24 24"><path fill="currentColor" fill-rule="evenodd" d="M4.092 11.06a6.95 6.95 0 1 1 13.9 0 6.95 6.95 0 0 1-13.9 0m6.95-8.05a8.05 8.05 0 1 0 5.13 14.26l3.75 3.75a.56.56 0 1 0 .79-.79l-3.73-3.73A8.05 8.05 0 0 0 11.042 3z" clip-rule="evenodd"></path></svg></div><input role="combobox" aria-controls="searchResults" aria-expanded="false" aria-label="search" data-testid="headerSearchInput" tabindex="0" class="ay be bf bg z bh bi bj bk bl" placeholder="Search" value=""/></div></div></div><div class="h k w fg fh"><div class="fi ab"><span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="headerWriteButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?operation=register&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fnew-story&source=---top_nav_layout_nav-----------------------new_post_topnav-----------"><div class="bf b bg z du fj fk ab q fl fm"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-label="Write"><path fill="currentColor" d="M14 4a.5.5 0 0 0 0-1zm7 6a.5.5 0 0 0-1 0zm-7-7H4v1h10zM3 4v16h1V4zm1 17h16v-1H4zm17-1V10h-1v10zm-1 1a1 1 0 0 0 1-1h-1zM3 20a1 1 0 0 0 1 1v-1zM4 3a1 1 0 0 0-1 1h1z"></path><path stroke="currentColor" d="m17.5 4.5-8.458 8.458a.25.25 0 0 0-.06.098l-.824 2.47a.25.25 0 0 0 .316.316l2.47-.823a.25.25 0 0 0 .098-.06L19.5 6.5m-2-2 2.323-2.323a.25.25 0 0 1 .354 0l1.646 1.646a.25.25 0 0 1 0 .354L19.5 6.5m-2-2 2 2"></path></svg><div class="dt l">Write</div></div></a></span></div></div><div class="k j i d"><div class="fi ab"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="headerSearchButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/search?source=---top_nav_layout_nav----------------------------------"><div class="bf b bg z du fj fk ab q fl fm"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-label="Search"><path fill="currentColor" fill-rule="evenodd" d="M4.092 11.06a6.95 6.95 0 1 1 13.9 0 6.95 6.95 0 0 1-13.9 0m6.95-8.05a8.05 8.05 0 1 0 5.13 14.26l3.75 3.75a.56.56 0 1 0 .79-.79l-3.73-3.73A8.05 8.05 0 0 0 11.042 3z" clip-rule="evenodd"></path></svg></div></a></div></div><div class="fi h k j"><div class="ab q"><p class="bf b dx dy dz ea eb ec ed ee ef eg du"><span><button class="bf b dx dy eh dz ea ei eb ec ej ek ee el em eg eo ep eq er es et eu ev ew ex ey ez fa fb fc fd bm fe ff" data-testid="headerSignUpButton">Sign up</button></span></p><div class="ax l"><p class="bf b dx dy dz ea eb ec ed ee ef eg du"><span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="headerSignInButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?operation=login&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056&source=post_page---top_nav_layout_nav-----------------------global_nav-----------">Sign in</a></span></p></div></div></div><div class="l" aria-hidden="false"><button class="ay fn am ab q ao fo fp fq" aria-label="user options menu" data-testid="headerUserIcon"><div class="l fj"><img alt="" class="l fd by bz ca cx" src="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:64:64/1*dmbNkD5D-u45r44go_cf0g.png" width="32" height="32" loading="lazy" role="presentation"/><div class="fr by l bz ca fs n ay ft"></div></div></button></div></div></div><div class="l"><div class="fu fv fw fx fy l"><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"></div></div><article><div class="l"><div class="l"><span class="l"></span><section><div><div class="fs gi gj gk gl gm"></div><div class="gn go gp gq gr"><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"><div><h1 id="c63a" class="pw-post-title gs gt gu bf gv gw gx gy gz ha hb hc hd he hf hg hh hi hj hk hl hm hn ho hp hq bk" data-testid="storyTitle">Fond Memories of a Gentle Soul</h1></div><div><h2 id="ecee" class="pw-subtitle-paragraph hr gt gu bf b hs ht hu hv hw hx hy hz ia ib ic id ie if ig cq du">Salvation comes unexpectedly</h2><div><div class="speechify-ignore ab cp"><div class="speechify-ignore bh l"><div class="ih ii ij ik il ab"><div><div class="ab im"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><a rel="noopener follow" href="/@lashelltinder?source=post_page---byline--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><div class="l in io by ip iq"><div class="l fj"><img alt="LaShell Tinder" class="l fd by dd de cx" src="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:88:88/1*Vh8dSpXyXJfD8XzjewhURA.jpeg" width="44" height="44" loading="lazy" data-testid="authorPhoto"/><div class="ir by l dd de fs n is ft"></div></div></div></a></div></div><div class="it ab fj"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><a href="https://medium.com/middle-pause?source=post_page---byline--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><div class="l iu iv by ip iw"><div class="l fj"><img alt="Middle-Pause" class="l fd by br ix cx" src="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:48:48/1*k6adZm3uTGISccg7GHzyVQ.png" width="24" height="24" loading="lazy" data-testid="publicationPhoto"/><div class="ir by l br ix fs n is ft"></div></div></div></a></div></div></div></div></div><div class="bn bh l"><div class="ab"><div style="flex:1"><span class="bf b bg z bk"><div class="iy ab q"><div class="ab q iz"><div class="ab q"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><p class="bf b ja jb bk"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar jc" data-testid="authorName" rel="noopener follow" href="/@lashelltinder?source=post_page---byline--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------">LaShell Tinder</a></p></div></div></div><span class="jd je" aria-hidden="true"><span class="bf b bg z du">·</span></span><p class="bf b ja jb du"><span><a class="jf jg ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar ex jh ji" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?actionUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2F_%2Fsubscribe%2Fuser%2F1bb3a96aae15&operation=register&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056&user=LaShell+Tinder&userId=1bb3a96aae15&source=post_page-1bb3a96aae15--byline--cef7bf43c056---------------------post_header-----------">Follow</a></span></p></div></div></span></div></div><div class="l jj"><span class="bf b bg z du"><div class="ab cn jk jl jm"><div class="jn jo ab"><div class="bf b bg z du ab jp"><span class="jq l jj">Published in</span><div><div class="l" aria-hidden="false"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar jc ab q" data-testid="publicationName" href="https://medium.com/middle-pause?source=post_page---byline--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><p class="bf b bg z jr js jt ju jv jw jx jy bk">Middle-Pause</p></a></div></div></div><div class="h k"><span class="jd je" aria-hidden="true"><span class="bf b bg z du">·</span></span></div></div><span class="bf b bg z du"><div class="ab ae"><span data-testid="storyReadTime">3 min read</span><div class="jz ka l" aria-hidden="true"><span class="l" aria-hidden="true"><span class="bf b bg z du">·</span></span></div>2 days ago</div></span></div></span></div></div></div><div class="ab cp kb kc kd ke kf kg kh ki kj kk kl km kn ko kp kq"><div class="h k w fg fh q"><div class="lg l"><div class="ab q lh li"><div class="pw-multi-vote-icon fj jq lj lk ll"><span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="headerClapButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?actionUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2F_%2Fvote%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fcef7bf43c056&operation=register&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056&user=LaShell+Tinder&userId=1bb3a96aae15&source=---header_actions--cef7bf43c056---------------------clap_footer-----------"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><div class="lm ao ln lo lp lq am lr ls lt ll"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-label="clap"><path fill-rule="evenodd" d="M11.37.828 12 3.282l.63-2.454zM13.916 3.953l1.523-2.112-1.184-.39zM8.589 1.84l1.522 2.112-.337-2.501zM18.523 18.92c-.86.86-1.75 1.246-2.62 1.33a6 6 0 0 0 .407-.372c2.388-2.389 2.86-4.951 1.399-7.623l-.912-1.603-.79-1.672c-.26-.56-.194-.98.203-1.288a.7.7 0 0 1 .546-.132c.283.046.546.231.728.5l2.363 4.157c.976 1.624 1.141 4.237-1.324 6.702m-10.999-.438L3.37 14.328a.828.828 0 0 1 .585-1.408.83.83 0 0 1 .585.242l2.158 2.157a.365.365 0 0 0 .516-.516l-2.157-2.158-1.449-1.449a.826.826 0 0 1 1.167-1.17l3.438 3.44a.363.363 0 0 0 .516 0 .364.364 0 0 0 0-.516L5.293 9.513l-.97-.97a.826.826 0 0 1 0-1.166.84.84 0 0 1 1.167 0l.97.968 3.437 3.436a.36.36 0 0 0 .517 0 .366.366 0 0 0 0-.516L6.977 7.83a.82.82 0 0 1-.241-.584.82.82 0 0 1 .824-.826c.219 0 .43.087.584.242l5.787 5.787a.366.366 0 0 0 .587-.415l-1.117-2.363c-.26-.56-.194-.98.204-1.289a.7.7 0 0 1 .546-.132c.283.046.545.232.727.501l2.193 3.86c1.302 2.38.883 4.59-1.277 6.75-1.156 1.156-2.602 1.627-4.19 1.367-1.418-.236-2.866-1.033-4.079-2.246M10.75 5.971l2.12 2.12c-.41.502-.465 1.17-.128 1.89l.22.465-3.523-3.523a.8.8 0 0 1-.097-.368c0-.22.086-.428.241-.584a.847.847 0 0 1 1.167 0m7.355 1.705c-.31-.461-.746-.758-1.23-.837a1.44 1.44 0 0 0-1.11.275c-.312.24-.505.543-.59.881a1.74 1.74 0 0 0-.906-.465 1.47 1.47 0 0 0-.82.106l-2.182-2.182a1.56 1.56 0 0 0-2.2 0 1.54 1.54 0 0 0-.396.701 1.56 1.56 0 0 0-2.21-.01 1.55 1.55 0 0 0-.416.753c-.624-.624-1.649-.624-2.237-.037a1.557 1.557 0 0 0 0 2.2c-.239.1-.501.238-.715.453a1.56 1.56 0 0 0 0 2.2l.516.515a1.556 1.556 0 0 0-.753 2.615L7.01 19c1.32 1.319 2.909 2.189 4.475 2.449q.482.08.971.08c.85 0 1.653-.198 2.393-.579.231.033.46.054.686.054 1.266 0 2.457-.52 3.505-1.567 2.763-2.763 2.552-5.734 1.439-7.586z" clip-rule="evenodd"></path></svg></div></div></div></a></span></div><div class="pw-multi-vote-count l lu lv lw lx ly lz ma"><p class="bf b dv z du"><span class="mb">--</span></p></div></div></div><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><button class="ao lm me mf ab q fk mg mh" aria-label="responses"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" class="md"><path d="M18.006 16.803c1.533-1.456 2.234-3.325 2.234-5.321C20.24 7.357 16.709 4 12.191 4S4 7.357 4 11.482c0 4.126 3.674 7.482 8.191 7.482.817 0 1.622-.111 2.393-.327.231.2.48.391.744.559 1.06.693 2.203 1.044 3.399 1.044.224-.008.4-.112.486-.287a.49.49 0 0 0-.042-.518c-.495-.67-.845-1.364-1.04-2.057a4 4 0 0 1-.125-.598zm-3.122 1.055-.067-.223-.315.096a8 8 0 0 1-2.311.338c-4.023 0-7.292-2.955-7.292-6.587 0-3.633 3.269-6.588 7.292-6.588 4.014 0 7.112 2.958 7.112 6.593 0 1.794-.608 3.469-2.027 4.72l-.195.168v.255c0 .056 0 .151.016.295.025.231.081.478.154.733.154.558.398 1.117.722 1.659a5.3 5.3 0 0 1-2.165-.845c-.276-.176-.714-.383-.941-.59z"></path></svg><p class="bf b dv z du"><span class="pw-responses-count mc md">3</span></p></button></div></div></div><div class="ab q kr ks kt ku kv kw kx ky kz la lb lc ld le lf"><div class="mi k j i d"></div><div class="h k"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="headerBookmarkButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?actionUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2F_%2Fbookmark%2Fp%2Fcef7bf43c056&operation=register&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056&source=---header_actions--cef7bf43c056---------------------bookmark_footer-----------"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="25" height="25" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 25 25" class="du mj" aria-label="Add to list bookmark button"><path fill="currentColor" d="M18 2.5a.5.5 0 0 1 1 0V5h2.5a.5.5 0 0 1 0 1H19v2.5a.5.5 0 1 1-1 0V6h-2.5a.5.5 0 0 1 0-1H18zM7 7a1 1 0 0 1 1-1h3.5a.5.5 0 0 0 0-1H8a2 2 0 0 0-2 2v14a.5.5 0 0 0 .805.396L12.5 17l5.695 4.396A.5.5 0 0 0 19 21v-8.5a.5.5 0 0 0-1 0v7.485l-5.195-4.012a.5.5 0 0 0-.61 0L7 19.985z"></path></svg></a></span></div></div></div><div class="fd mk cn"><div class="l ae"><div class="ab cb"><div class="ml mm mn mo mp mq ci bh"><div class="ab"><div class="bm bh" aria-hidden="false"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><button aria-label="Listen" data-testid="audioPlayButton" class="af fk ah ai aj ak al mr an ao ap ex ms mt mh mu mv mw mx my s mz na nb nc nd ne nf u ng nh ni"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 24 24"><path fill="currentColor" fill-rule="evenodd" d="M3 12a9 9 0 1 1 18 0 9 9 0 0 1-18 0m9-10C6.477 2 2 6.477 2 12s4.477 10 10 10 10-4.477 10-10S17.523 2 12 2m3.376 10.416-4.599 3.066a.5.5 0 0 1-.777-.416V8.934a.5.5 0 0 1 .777-.416l4.599 3.066a.5.5 0 0 1 0 .832" clip-rule="evenodd"></path></svg><div class="j i d"><p class="bf b bg z du">Listen</p></div></button></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false" aria-describedby="postFooterSocialMenu" aria-labelledby="postFooterSocialMenu"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><button aria-controls="postFooterSocialMenu" aria-expanded="false" aria-label="Share Post" data-testid="headerSocialShareButton" class="af fk ah ai aj ak al mr an ao ap ex ms mt mh mu mv mw mx my s mz na nb nc nd ne nf u ng nh ni"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 24 24"><path fill="currentColor" fill-rule="evenodd" d="M15.218 4.931a.4.4 0 0 1-.118.132l.012.006a.45.45 0 0 1-.292.074.5.5 0 0 1-.3-.13l-2.02-2.02v7.07c0 .28-.23.5-.5.5s-.5-.22-.5-.5v-7.04l-2 2a.45.45 0 0 1-.57.04h-.02a.4.4 0 0 1-.16-.3.4.4 0 0 1 .1-.32l2.8-2.8a.5.5 0 0 1 .7 0l2.8 2.79a.42.42 0 0 1 .068.498m-.106.138.008.004v-.01zM16 7.063h1.5a2 2 0 0 1 2 2v10a2 2 0 0 1-2 2h-11c-1.1 0-2-.9-2-2v-10a2 2 0 0 1 2-2H8a.5.5 0 0 1 .35.15.5.5 0 0 1 .15.35.5.5 0 0 1-.15.35.5.5 0 0 1-.35.15H6.4c-.5 0-.9.4-.9.9v10.2a.9.9 0 0 0 .9.9h11.2c.5 0 .9-.4.9-.9v-10.2c0-.5-.4-.9-.9-.9H16a.5.5 0 0 1 0-1" clip-rule="evenodd"></path></svg><div class="j i d"><p class="bf b bg z du">Share</p></div></button></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><figure class="nm nn no np nq nr nj nk paragraph-image"><div role="button" tabindex="0" class="ns nt fj nu bh nv"><div class="nj nk nl"><picture><source srcSet="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:640/format:webp/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 640w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:720/format:webp/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 720w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:750/format:webp/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 750w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:786/format:webp/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 786w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:828/format:webp/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 828w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:1100/format:webp/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 1100w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:1400/format:webp/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 1400w" sizes="(min-resolution: 4dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 50vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 4) and (max-width: 700px) 50vw, (min-resolution: 3dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 67vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 3) and (max-width: 700px) 65vw, (min-resolution: 2.5dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 80vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 2.5) and (max-width: 700px) 80vw, (min-resolution: 2dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 100vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 2) and (max-width: 700px) 100vw, 700px" type="image/webp"/><source data-testid="og" srcSet="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:640/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 640w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:720/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 720w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:750/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 750w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:786/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 786w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:828/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 828w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:1100/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 1100w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:1400/0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP 1400w" sizes="(min-resolution: 4dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 50vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 4) and (max-width: 700px) 50vw, (min-resolution: 3dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 67vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 3) and (max-width: 700px) 65vw, (min-resolution: 2.5dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 80vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 2.5) and (max-width: 700px) 80vw, (min-resolution: 2dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 100vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 2) and (max-width: 700px) 100vw, 700px"/><img alt="on the left is a sculptured head of Carolina, the heroine of the story. on the right is a photo of her holding a teddy bear. She’s an Argentinean woman in her 70s." class="bh mq nw c" width="700" height="533" loading="eager"/></picture></div></div><figcaption class="nx ff ny nj nk nz oa bf b bg z du">A bust of Carolina completed by my cousin in her first year of art school.</figcaption></figure><p id="d60e" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">At twenty-three, I had an Uncle Sam shotgun wedding to a foreign national. We were in love but sped up the process so that he could seek employment.</p><p id="30fe" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">Two and a half years later, I met the extended family.</p><p id="8103" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">I remember regularly feeling overwhelmed because I lacked fluency in Spanish. Our youngest was only sixteen months which also kept me quite busy during our trip to Argentina in 1989 for the holidays.</p><p id="71a5" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">After celebrating Christmas with my then-husband’s parents and his father’s side of the family, we drove to Rio Segundo to spend New Year’s with his mom’s side of the family.</p><p id="391c" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">Our car was 100 yards from the carport when people streamed out of the youngest sibling (Tia Moni)’s tiny house to greet us. Tia Moni’s four daughters, the spouse of the eldest, her husband, and their live-in nanny/maid waited anxiously for us to park so they could engulf us with hugs. People talked loudly to be heard above the barking dogs in all the ensuing excitement.</p></div></div></div><div class="ab cb ox oy oz pa" role="separator"><span class="pb by bm pc pd pe"></span><span class="pb by bm pc pd pe"></span><span class="pb by bm pc pd"></span></div><div class="gn go gp gq gr"><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"><p id="c935" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">I can’t recall what the cousins called the nearly toothless woman with gray hair and oversized facial features that seemed to weigh down her tiny frame. Perhaps I blocked it from my memory because I thought the word — a pseudonym for an uneducated individual — was rude.</p><p id="42d5" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">At the time, I didn’t understand the culture around nicknames and the practice of using them without bad intentions. Later, as I assimilated into the culture and people, I understood that references to characteristics that I found offensive were often used as terms of endearment.</p><p id="439f" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">I also got to know the family and extended members quite well. They became my family — my second home.</p></div></div></div><div class="ab cb ox oy oz pa" role="separator"><span class="pb by bm pc pd pe"></span><span class="pb by bm pc pd pe"></span><span class="pb by bm pc pd"></span></div><div class="gn go gp gq gr"><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"><p id="9a7e" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">The youngest of twelve, Carolina grew up in a household lacking in love, surrounded by abusive siblings and a distant father who served in WWI. Schooling was deemed unnecessary for the female children.</p><p id="2e42" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">By the time I met her during my first visit, Carolina was in her 70s. She moved about her day, casually sipping <em class="pf">maté</em> with us and sharing in the banter. Although she was paid to work, her cheerful presence felt more like a grandmother helping out.</p><p id="54ff" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">When Tia Moni was pregnant with her fourth child, Carolina, who was 60 years old, came to the Granja family as the maid and nanny. It was a busy house with three girls under six years of age.</p><p id="7459" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">Despite her aging body, she managed daily household chores with surprising strength. She reminded me of the small-framed farm women I knew growing up in Missouri, hard work reflected in their oversized hands, calloused and weathered.</p></div></div></div><div class="ab cb ox oy oz pa" role="separator"><span class="pb by bm pc pd pe"></span><span class="pb by bm pc pd pe"></span><span class="pb by bm pc pd"></span></div><div class="gn go gp gq gr"><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"><p id="7806" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">Years later, when I saw Carolina's bust displayed in Maria Noel’s home, it took me back to that first visit and my fondness for the gentle woman.</p><p id="f4e7" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">My cousin was able to render a wonderful likeness of Carolina because of the deep bond they shared. Although Carolina loved the entire family, it was the youngest who captured Carolina’s heart and the one she had a lasting impact upon.</p><p id="225d" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">While talking about making the bust in art school, Maria Noel recalled how she played “teacher” as a first grader. She worked diligently with Carolina, teaching her how to write her name.</p><p id="8c71" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">They swapped caregiving roles as Carolina aged. Carolina was Maria Noel’s nanny, mother, and grandmother until she became the ‘daughter’ when Carolina could no longer take care of herself. Carolina died April 13, 2006, at 87 years old, with Maria Noel by her side.</p><p id="9f81" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">Carolina experienced salvation for a life that had been marked by so much cruelty and invisibility. Maria Noel and Carolina shared a genuine love, one that was closer than that shared with their own families.</p><p id="feaf" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">Maria Noel and her family gave this beautiful soul a life she never could have dreamed of, one where she was loved, protected, and appreciated.</p><p id="1216" class="pw-post-body-paragraph ob oc gu od b hs oe of og hv oh oi oj ok ol om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow gn bk">As an artist, Maria Noel captured the finest details of Carolina, including her wrinkled hands and stiff fingers — a reflection of someone who had experienced a difficult life. Part of the fond memories I have of Carolina include those hands. <br/><br/><br/><em class="pf">Thank you, Marilyn, for your lovely editing support! Thank you Medium community for reading this tribute to Carolina.</em></p></div></div></div></div></section></div></div></article></div><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"><div class="pg ph ab jm"><div class="pi ab"><a class="pj ay am ao" rel="noopener follow" href="/tag/redemption?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><div class="pk fj cx pl ge pm pn bf b bg z bk po">Redemption</div></a></div><div class="pi ab"><a class="pj ay am ao" rel="noopener follow" href="/tag/uneducated?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><div class="pk fj cx pl ge pm pn bf b bg z bk po">Uneducated</div></a></div><div class="pi ab"><a class="pj ay am ao" rel="noopener follow" href="/tag/motherly-love?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><div class="pk fj cx pl ge pm pn bf b bg z bk po">Motherly Love</div></a></div><div class="pi ab"><a class="pj ay am ao" rel="noopener follow" href="/tag/caregiving?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><div class="pk fj cx pl ge pm pn bf b bg z bk po">Caregiving</div></a></div><div class="pi ab"><a class="pj ay am ao" rel="noopener follow" href="/tag/relationships?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><div class="pk fj cx pl ge pm pn bf b bg z bk po">Relationships</div></a></div></div></div></div><div class="l"></div><footer class="pp pq pr ps pt pu pv pw px ab q py iw c"><div class="l ae"><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"><div class="ab cp pz"><div class="ab q lh"><div class="qa l"><span class="l qb qc qd e d"><div class="ab q lh li"><div class="pw-multi-vote-icon fj jq lj lk ll"><span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="footerClapButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?actionUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2F_%2Fvote%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fcef7bf43c056&operation=register&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056&user=LaShell+Tinder&userId=1bb3a96aae15&source=---footer_actions--cef7bf43c056---------------------clap_footer-----------"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><div class="lm ao ln lo lp lq am lr ls lt ll"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-label="clap"><path fill-rule="evenodd" d="M11.37.828 12 3.282l.63-2.454zM13.916 3.953l1.523-2.112-1.184-.39zM8.589 1.84l1.522 2.112-.337-2.501zM18.523 18.92c-.86.86-1.75 1.246-2.62 1.33a6 6 0 0 0 .407-.372c2.388-2.389 2.86-4.951 1.399-7.623l-.912-1.603-.79-1.672c-.26-.56-.194-.98.203-1.288a.7.7 0 0 1 .546-.132c.283.046.546.231.728.5l2.363 4.157c.976 1.624 1.141 4.237-1.324 6.702m-10.999-.438L3.37 14.328a.828.828 0 0 1 .585-1.408.83.83 0 0 1 .585.242l2.158 2.157a.365.365 0 0 0 .516-.516l-2.157-2.158-1.449-1.449a.826.826 0 0 1 1.167-1.17l3.438 3.44a.363.363 0 0 0 .516 0 .364.364 0 0 0 0-.516L5.293 9.513l-.97-.97a.826.826 0 0 1 0-1.166.84.84 0 0 1 1.167 0l.97.968 3.437 3.436a.36.36 0 0 0 .517 0 .366.366 0 0 0 0-.516L6.977 7.83a.82.82 0 0 1-.241-.584.82.82 0 0 1 .824-.826c.219 0 .43.087.584.242l5.787 5.787a.366.366 0 0 0 .587-.415l-1.117-2.363c-.26-.56-.194-.98.204-1.289a.7.7 0 0 1 .546-.132c.283.046.545.232.727.501l2.193 3.86c1.302 2.38.883 4.59-1.277 6.75-1.156 1.156-2.602 1.627-4.19 1.367-1.418-.236-2.866-1.033-4.079-2.246M10.75 5.971l2.12 2.12c-.41.502-.465 1.17-.128 1.89l.22.465-3.523-3.523a.8.8 0 0 1-.097-.368c0-.22.086-.428.241-.584a.847.847 0 0 1 1.167 0m7.355 1.705c-.31-.461-.746-.758-1.23-.837a1.44 1.44 0 0 0-1.11.275c-.312.24-.505.543-.59.881a1.74 1.74 0 0 0-.906-.465 1.47 1.47 0 0 0-.82.106l-2.182-2.182a1.56 1.56 0 0 0-2.2 0 1.54 1.54 0 0 0-.396.701 1.56 1.56 0 0 0-2.21-.01 1.55 1.55 0 0 0-.416.753c-.624-.624-1.649-.624-2.237-.037a1.557 1.557 0 0 0 0 2.2c-.239.1-.501.238-.715.453a1.56 1.56 0 0 0 0 2.2l.516.515a1.556 1.556 0 0 0-.753 2.615L7.01 19c1.32 1.319 2.909 2.189 4.475 2.449q.482.08.971.08c.85 0 1.653-.198 2.393-.579.231.033.46.054.686.054 1.266 0 2.457-.52 3.505-1.567 2.763-2.763 2.552-5.734 1.439-7.586z" clip-rule="evenodd"></path></svg></div></div></div></a></span></div><div class="pw-multi-vote-count l lu lv lw lx ly lz ma"><p class="bf b dv z du"><span class="mb">--</span></p></div></div></span><span class="l h g f qe qf"><div class="ab q lh li"><div class="pw-multi-vote-icon fj jq lj lk ll"><span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="footerClapButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?actionUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2F_%2Fvote%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fcef7bf43c056&operation=register&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056&user=LaShell+Tinder&userId=1bb3a96aae15&source=---footer_actions--cef7bf43c056---------------------clap_footer-----------"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><div class="lm ao ln lo lp lq am lr ls lt ll"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-label="clap"><path fill-rule="evenodd" d="M11.37.828 12 3.282l.63-2.454zM13.916 3.953l1.523-2.112-1.184-.39zM8.589 1.84l1.522 2.112-.337-2.501zM18.523 18.92c-.86.86-1.75 1.246-2.62 1.33a6 6 0 0 0 .407-.372c2.388-2.389 2.86-4.951 1.399-7.623l-.912-1.603-.79-1.672c-.26-.56-.194-.98.203-1.288a.7.7 0 0 1 .546-.132c.283.046.546.231.728.5l2.363 4.157c.976 1.624 1.141 4.237-1.324 6.702m-10.999-.438L3.37 14.328a.828.828 0 0 1 .585-1.408.83.83 0 0 1 .585.242l2.158 2.157a.365.365 0 0 0 .516-.516l-2.157-2.158-1.449-1.449a.826.826 0 0 1 1.167-1.17l3.438 3.44a.363.363 0 0 0 .516 0 .364.364 0 0 0 0-.516L5.293 9.513l-.97-.97a.826.826 0 0 1 0-1.166.84.84 0 0 1 1.167 0l.97.968 3.437 3.436a.36.36 0 0 0 .517 0 .366.366 0 0 0 0-.516L6.977 7.83a.82.82 0 0 1-.241-.584.82.82 0 0 1 .824-.826c.219 0 .43.087.584.242l5.787 5.787a.366.366 0 0 0 .587-.415l-1.117-2.363c-.26-.56-.194-.98.204-1.289a.7.7 0 0 1 .546-.132c.283.046.545.232.727.501l2.193 3.86c1.302 2.38.883 4.59-1.277 6.75-1.156 1.156-2.602 1.627-4.19 1.367-1.418-.236-2.866-1.033-4.079-2.246M10.75 5.971l2.12 2.12c-.41.502-.465 1.17-.128 1.89l.22.465-3.523-3.523a.8.8 0 0 1-.097-.368c0-.22.086-.428.241-.584a.847.847 0 0 1 1.167 0m7.355 1.705c-.31-.461-.746-.758-1.23-.837a1.44 1.44 0 0 0-1.11.275c-.312.24-.505.543-.59.881a1.74 1.74 0 0 0-.906-.465 1.47 1.47 0 0 0-.82.106l-2.182-2.182a1.56 1.56 0 0 0-2.2 0 1.54 1.54 0 0 0-.396.701 1.56 1.56 0 0 0-2.21-.01 1.55 1.55 0 0 0-.416.753c-.624-.624-1.649-.624-2.237-.037a1.557 1.557 0 0 0 0 2.2c-.239.1-.501.238-.715.453a1.56 1.56 0 0 0 0 2.2l.516.515a1.556 1.556 0 0 0-.753 2.615L7.01 19c1.32 1.319 2.909 2.189 4.475 2.449q.482.08.971.08c.85 0 1.653-.198 2.393-.579.231.033.46.054.686.054 1.266 0 2.457-.52 3.505-1.567 2.763-2.763 2.552-5.734 1.439-7.586z" clip-rule="evenodd"></path></svg></div></div></div></a></span></div><div class="pw-multi-vote-count l lu lv lw lx ly lz ma"><p class="bf b dv z du"><span class="mb">--</span></p></div></div></span></div><div class="bq ab"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><button class="ao lm me mf ab q fk mg mh" aria-label="responses"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" class="md"><path d="M18.006 16.803c1.533-1.456 2.234-3.325 2.234-5.321C20.24 7.357 16.709 4 12.191 4S4 7.357 4 11.482c0 4.126 3.674 7.482 8.191 7.482.817 0 1.622-.111 2.393-.327.231.2.48.391.744.559 1.06.693 2.203 1.044 3.399 1.044.224-.008.4-.112.486-.287a.49.49 0 0 0-.042-.518c-.495-.67-.845-1.364-1.04-2.057a4 4 0 0 1-.125-.598zm-3.122 1.055-.067-.223-.315.096a8 8 0 0 1-2.311.338c-4.023 0-7.292-2.955-7.292-6.587 0-3.633 3.269-6.588 7.292-6.588 4.014 0 7.112 2.958 7.112 6.593 0 1.794-.608 3.469-2.027 4.72l-.195.168v.255c0 .056 0 .151.016.295.025.231.081.478.154.733.154.558.398 1.117.722 1.659a5.3 5.3 0 0 1-2.165-.845c-.276-.176-.714-.383-.941-.59z"></path></svg><p class="bf b bg z du"><span class="pw-responses-count mc md">3</span></p></button></div></div></div></div><div class="ab q"><div class="pe l jj"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" data-testid="footerBookmarkButton" rel="noopener follow" href="/m/signin?actionUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2F_%2Fbookmark%2Fp%2Fcef7bf43c056&operation=register&redirect=https%3A%2F%2Fmedium.com%2Fmiddle-pause%2Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056&source=---footer_actions--cef7bf43c056---------------------bookmark_footer-----------"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="25" height="25" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 25 25" class="du mj" aria-label="Add to list bookmark button"><path fill="currentColor" d="M18 2.5a.5.5 0 0 1 1 0V5h2.5a.5.5 0 0 1 0 1H19v2.5a.5.5 0 1 1-1 0V6h-2.5a.5.5 0 0 1 0-1H18zM7 7a1 1 0 0 1 1-1h3.5a.5.5 0 0 0 0-1H8a2 2 0 0 0-2 2v14a.5.5 0 0 0 .805.396L12.5 17l5.695 4.396A.5.5 0 0 0 19 21v-8.5a.5.5 0 0 0-1 0v7.485l-5.195-4.012a.5.5 0 0 0-.61 0L7 19.985z"></path></svg></a></span></div></div></div><div class="pe l jj"><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false" aria-describedby="postFooterSocialMenu" aria-labelledby="postFooterSocialMenu"><div><div class="bm" aria-hidden="false"><button aria-controls="postFooterSocialMenu" aria-expanded="false" aria-label="Share Post" data-testid="footerSocialShareButton" class="af fk ah ai aj ak al mr an ao ap ex ms mt mh mu"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="24" height="24" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 24 24"><path fill="currentColor" fill-rule="evenodd" d="M15.218 4.931a.4.4 0 0 1-.118.132l.012.006a.45.45 0 0 1-.292.074.5.5 0 0 1-.3-.13l-2.02-2.02v7.07c0 .28-.23.5-.5.5s-.5-.22-.5-.5v-7.04l-2 2a.45.45 0 0 1-.57.04h-.02a.4.4 0 0 1-.16-.3.4.4 0 0 1 .1-.32l2.8-2.8a.5.5 0 0 1 .7 0l2.8 2.79a.42.42 0 0 1 .068.498m-.106.138.008.004v-.01zM16 7.063h1.5a2 2 0 0 1 2 2v10a2 2 0 0 1-2 2h-11c-1.1 0-2-.9-2-2v-10a2 2 0 0 1 2-2H8a.5.5 0 0 1 .35.15.5.5 0 0 1 .15.35.5.5 0 0 1-.15.35.5.5 0 0 1-.35.15H6.4c-.5 0-.9.4-.9.9v10.2a.9.9 0 0 0 .9.9h11.2c.5 0 .9-.4.9-.9v-10.2c0-.5-.4-.9-.9-.9H16a.5.5 0 0 1 0-1" clip-rule="evenodd"></path></svg></button></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></footer><div class="qg qh qi qj qk l bx"><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"><div class="ql l"><div class="ab qm qn qo jl jk"><div class="qp qq qr qs qt qu qv qw qx qy ab cp"><div class="h k"><a href="https://medium.com/middle-pause?source=post_page---post_publication_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><div class="fj ab"><img alt="Middle-Pause" class="qz in io cx" src="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:96:96/1*k6adZm3uTGISccg7GHzyVQ.png" width="48" height="48" loading="lazy"/><div class="qz l io in fs n fr ra"></div></div></a></div><div class="j i d"><a href="https://medium.com/middle-pause?source=post_page---post_publication_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><div class="fj ab"><img alt="Middle-Pause" class="qz rc rb cx" src="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:128:128/1*k6adZm3uTGISccg7GHzyVQ.png" width="64" height="64" loading="lazy"/><div class="qz l rb rc fs n fr ra"></div></div></a></div><div class="j i d rd jj"><div class="ab"></div></div></div><div class="ab co re"><div class="rf rg rh ri rj l"><a class="af ag ah aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at ab q" href="https://medium.com/middle-pause?source=post_page---post_publication_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><h2 class="pw-author-name bf rl rm rn ro rp rq rr ok rs rt oo ru rv os rw rx bk"><span class="gn rk">Published in Middle-Pause</span></h2></a><div class="pi ab im"><div class="l jj"><span class="pw-follower-count bf b bg z du"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar jc" rel="noopener follow" href="/middle-pause/followers?source=post_page---post_publication_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------">4.4K Followers</a></span></div><div class="bf b bg z du ab jp"><span class="jd l" aria-hidden="true"><span class="bf b bg z du">·</span></span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar jc" rel="noopener follow" href="/middle-pause/please-no-more-scented-candles-a8fd27e85c81?source=post_page---post_publication_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------">Last published 5 hours ago</a></div></div><div class="ry l"><p class="bf b bg z bk"><span class="gn">We are the voices of women who encourage, inspire, and empower each other to live lives of meaning and purpose. We are women in the middle.</span></p></div></div></div><div class="h k"><div class="ab"></div></div></div></div><div class="ab qm qn qo jl jk"><div class="qp qq qr qs qt qu qv qw qx qy ab cp"><div class="h k"><a tabindex="0" rel="noopener follow" href="/@lashelltinder?source=post_page---post_author_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><div class="l fj"><img alt="LaShell Tinder" class="l fd by io in cx" src="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:96:96/1*Vh8dSpXyXJfD8XzjewhURA.jpeg" width="48" height="48" loading="lazy"/><div class="fr by l io in fs n ay ra"></div></div></a></div><div class="j i d"><a tabindex="0" rel="noopener follow" href="/@lashelltinder?source=post_page---post_author_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><div class="l fj"><img alt="LaShell Tinder" class="l fd by rb rc cx" src="https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fill:128:128/1*Vh8dSpXyXJfD8XzjewhURA.jpeg" width="64" height="64" loading="lazy"/><div class="fr by l rb rc fs n ay ra"></div></div></a></div><div class="j i d rd jj"><div class="ab"><span><button class="bf b bg z rz pk sa sb sc sd se ev ew sf sg sh fa fb fc fd bm fe ff">Follow</button></span></div></div></div><div class="ab co re"><div class="rf rg rh ri rj l"><a class="af ag ah aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at ab q" rel="noopener follow" href="/@lashelltinder?source=post_page---post_author_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><h2 class="pw-author-name bf rl rm rn ro rp rq rr ok rs rt oo ru rv os rw rx bk"><span class="gn rk">Written by LaShell Tinder</span></h2></a><div class="pi ab im"><div class="l jj"><span class="pw-follower-count bf b bg z du"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar jc" rel="noopener follow" href="/@lashelltinder/followers?source=post_page---post_author_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------">700 Followers</a></span></div><div class="bf b bg z du ab jp"><span class="jd l" aria-hidden="true"><span class="bf b bg z du">·</span></span><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar jc" rel="noopener follow" href="/@lashelltinder/following?source=post_page---post_author_info--cef7bf43c056--------------------------------">170 Following</a></div></div><div class="ry l"><p class="bf b bg z bk"><span class="gn">Exploring avocation as a writer after spending nearly 30 years as career expatriate and professional in global mobility. Insta @patacaliente1963/</span></p></div></div></div><div class="h k"><div class="ab"><span><button class="bf b bg z rz pk sa sb sc sd se ev ew sf sg sh fa fb fc fd bm fe ff">Follow</button></span></div></div></div><div class="si bh sj sk"></div></div></div><div class="h k j"><div class="si bh sj sl"></div><div class="ab cb"><div class="ci bh fz ga gb gc"><div class="sm ab lh jm"><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" href="https://help.medium.com/hc/en-us?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><p class="bf b dv z du">Help</p></a></div><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" href="https://medium.statuspage.io/?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><p class="bf b dv z du">Status</p></a></div><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" rel="noopener follow" href="/about?autoplay=1&source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><p class="bf b dv z du">About</p></a></div><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" rel="noopener follow" href="/jobs-at-medium/work-at-medium-959d1a85284e?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><p class="bf b dv z du">Careers</p></a></div><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" href="pressinquiries@medium.com?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><p class="bf b dv z du">Press</p></a></div><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" href="https://blog.medium.com/?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><p class="bf b dv z du">Blog</p></a></div><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" href="https://policy.medium.com/medium-privacy-policy-f03bf92035c9?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><p class="bf b dv z du">Privacy</p></a></div><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" href="https://policy.medium.com/medium-terms-of-service-9db0094a1e0f?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><p class="bf b dv z du">Terms</p></a></div><div class="sn so l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" href="https://speechify.com/medium?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------" rel="noopener follow"><p class="bf b dv z du">Text to speech</p></a></div><div class="sn l"><a class="af ag ah ai aj ak al am an ao ap aq ar as at" rel="noopener follow" href="/business?source=post_page-----cef7bf43c056--------------------------------"><p class="bf b dv z du">Teams</p></a></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><script>window.__BUILD_ID__="main-20241129-135346-5cf0f044cd"</script><script>window.__GRAPHQL_URI__ = "https://medium.com/_/graphql"</script><script>window.__PRELOADED_STATE__ = {"algolia":{"queries":{}},"cache":{"experimentGroupSet":true,"reason":"","group":"enabled","tags":["group-edgeCachePosts","post-cef7bf43c056","user-1bb3a96aae15","collection-22bdccd3fa4"],"serverVariantState":"44136fa355b3678a1146ad16f7e8649e94fb4fc21fe77e8310c060f61caaff8a","middlewareEnabled":true,"cacheStatus":"DYNAMIC","shouldUseCache":true,"vary":[],"lohpSummerUpsellEnabled":false,"publicationHierarchyEnabledWeb":false,"postBottomResponsesEnabled":false},"client":{"hydrated":false,"isUs":false,"isNativeMedium":false,"isSafariMobile":false,"isSafari":false,"isFirefox":false,"routingEntity":{"type":"DEFAULT","explicit":false},"viewerIsBot":false},"debug":{"requestId":"94223991-7a34-4540-8745-ce465ef49b8f","hybridDevServices":[],"originalSpanCarrier":{"traceparent":"00-1bea1dbc770144812c6ab8fa7465fbec-2d7508808fac1bff-01"}},"multiVote":{"clapsPerPost":{}},"navigation":{"branch":{"show":null,"hasRendered":null,"blockedByCTA":false},"hideGoogleOneTap":false,"hasRenderedAlternateUserBanner":null,"currentLocation":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002Fmiddle-pause\u002Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056","host":"medium.com","hostname":"medium.com","referrer":"","hasSetReferrer":false,"susiModal":{"step":null,"operation":"register"},"postRead":false,"partnerProgram":{"selectedCountryCode":null},"queryString":"","currentHash":""},"config":{"nodeEnv":"production","version":"main-20241129-135346-5cf0f044cd","target":"production","productName":"Medium","publicUrl":"https:\u002F\u002Fcdn-client.medium.com\u002Flite","authDomain":"medium.com","authGoogleClientId":"216296035834-k1k6qe060s2tp2a2jam4ljdcms00sttg.apps.googleusercontent.com","favicon":"production","glyphUrl":"https:\u002F\u002Fglyph.medium.com","branchKey":"key_live_ofxXr2qTrrU9NqURK8ZwEhknBxiI6KBm","algolia":{"appId":"MQ57UUUQZ2","apiKeySearch":"394474ced050e3911ae2249ecc774921","indexPrefix":"medium_","host":"-dsn.algolia.net"},"recaptchaKey":"6Lfc37IUAAAAAKGGtC6rLS13R1Hrw_BqADfS1LRk","recaptcha3Key":"6Lf8R9wUAAAAABMI_85Wb8melS7Zj6ziuf99Yot5","recaptchaEnterpriseKeyId":"6Le-uGgpAAAAAPprRaokM8AKthQ9KNGdoxaGUvVp","datadog":{"applicationId":"6702d87d-a7e0-42fe-bbcb-95b469547ea0","clientToken":"pub853ea8d17ad6821d9f8f11861d23dfed","rumToken":"pubf9cc52896502b9413b68ba36fc0c7162","context":{"deployment":{"target":"production","tag":"main-20241129-135346-5cf0f044cd","commit":"5cf0f044cde04a296c7f1e11fd4877d75fdab011"}},"datacenter":"us"},"googleAnalyticsCode":"G-7JY7T788PK","googlePay":{"apiVersion":"2","apiVersionMinor":"0","merchantId":"BCR2DN6TV7EMTGBM","merchantName":"Medium","instanceMerchantId":"13685562959212738550"},"applePay":{"version":3},"signInWallCustomDomainCollectionIds":["3a8144eabfe3","336d898217ee","61061eb0c96b","138adf9c44c","819cc2aaeee0"],"mediumMastodonDomainName":"me.dm","mediumOwnedAndOperatedCollectionIds":["8a9336e5bb4","b7e45b22fec3","193b68bd4fba","8d6b8a439e32","54c98c43354d","3f6ecf56618","d944778ce714","92d2092dc598","ae2a65f35510","1285ba81cada","544c7006046e","fc8964313712","40187e704f1c","88d9857e584e","7b6769f2748b","bcc38c8f6edf","cef6983b292","cb8577c9149e","444d13b52878","713d7dbc99b0","ef8e90590e66","191186aaafa0","55760f21cdc5","9dc80918cc93","bdc4052bbdba","8ccfed20cbb2"],"tierOneDomains":["medium.com","thebolditalic.com","arcdigital.media","towardsdatascience.com","uxdesign.cc","codeburst.io","psiloveyou.xyz","writingcooperative.com","entrepreneurshandbook.co","prototypr.io","betterhumans.coach.me","theascent.pub"],"topicsToFollow":["d61cf867d93f","8a146bc21b28","1eca0103fff3","4d562ee63426","aef1078a3ef5","e15e46793f8d","6158eb913466","55f1c20aba7a","3d18b94f6858","4861fee224fd","63c6f1f93ee","1d98b3a9a871","decb52b64abf","ae5d4995e225","830cded25262"],"topicToTagMappings":{"accessibility":"accessibility","addiction":"addiction","android-development":"android-development","art":"art","artificial-intelligence":"artificial-intelligence","astrology":"astrology","basic-income":"basic-income","beauty":"beauty","biotech":"biotech","blockchain":"blockchain","books":"books","business":"business","cannabis":"cannabis","cities":"cities","climate-change":"climate-change","comics":"comics","coronavirus":"coronavirus","creativity":"creativity","cryptocurrency":"cryptocurrency","culture":"culture","cybersecurity":"cybersecurity","data-science":"data-science","design":"design","digital-life":"digital-life","disability":"disability","economy":"economy","education":"education","equality":"equality","family":"family","feminism":"feminism","fiction":"fiction","film":"film","fitness":"fitness","food":"food","freelancing":"freelancing","future":"future","gadgets":"gadgets","gaming":"gaming","gun-control":"gun-control","health":"health","history":"history","humor":"humor","immigration":"immigration","ios-development":"ios-development","javascript":"javascript","justice":"justice","language":"language","leadership":"leadership","lgbtqia":"lgbtqia","lifestyle":"lifestyle","machine-learning":"machine-learning","makers":"makers","marketing":"marketing","math":"math","media":"media","mental-health":"mental-health","mindfulness":"mindfulness","money":"money","music":"music","neuroscience":"neuroscience","nonfiction":"nonfiction","outdoors":"outdoors","parenting":"parenting","pets":"pets","philosophy":"philosophy","photography":"photography","podcasts":"podcast","poetry":"poetry","politics":"politics","privacy":"privacy","product-management":"product-management","productivity":"productivity","programming":"programming","psychedelics":"psychedelics","psychology":"psychology","race":"race","relationships":"relationships","religion":"religion","remote-work":"remote-work","san-francisco":"san-francisco","science":"science","self":"self","self-driving-cars":"self-driving-cars","sexuality":"sexuality","social-media":"social-media","society":"society","software-engineering":"software-engineering","space":"space","spirituality":"spirituality","sports":"sports","startups":"startup","style":"style","technology":"technology","transportation":"transportation","travel":"travel","true-crime":"true-crime","tv":"tv","ux":"ux","venture-capital":"venture-capital","visual-design":"visual-design","work":"work","world":"world","writing":"writing"},"defaultImages":{"avatar":{"imageId":"1*dmbNkD5D-u45r44go_cf0g.png","height":150,"width":150},"orgLogo":{"imageId":"7*V1_7XP4snlmqrc_0Njontw.png","height":110,"width":500},"postLogo":{"imageId":"bd978bb536350a710e8efb012513429cabdc4c28700604261aeda246d0f980b7","height":810,"width":1440},"postPreviewImage":{"imageId":"1*hn4v1tCaJy7cWMyb0bpNpQ.png","height":386,"width":579}},"collectionStructuredData":{"8d6b8a439e32":{"name":"Elemental","data":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","ethicsPolicy":"https:\u002F\u002Fhelp.medium.com\u002Fhc\u002Fen-us\u002Farticles\u002F360043290473","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fcdn-images-1.medium.com\u002Fmax\u002F980\u002F1*9ygdqoKprhwuTVKUM0DLPA@2x.png","width":980,"height":159}}},"3f6ecf56618":{"name":"Forge","data":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","ethicsPolicy":"https:\u002F\u002Fhelp.medium.com\u002Fhc\u002Fen-us\u002Farticles\u002F360043290473","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fcdn-images-1.medium.com\u002Fmax\u002F596\u002F1*uULpIlImcO5TDuBZ6lm7Lg@2x.png","width":596,"height":183}}},"ae2a65f35510":{"name":"GEN","data":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","ethicsPolicy":"https:\u002F\u002Fhelp.medium.com\u002Fhc\u002Fen-us\u002Farticles\u002F360043290473","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fmiro.medium.com\u002Fmax\u002F264\u002F1*RdVZMdvfV3YiZTw6mX7yWA.png","width":264,"height":140}}},"88d9857e584e":{"name":"LEVEL","data":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","ethicsPolicy":"https:\u002F\u002Fhelp.medium.com\u002Fhc\u002Fen-us\u002Farticles\u002F360043290473","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fmiro.medium.com\u002Fmax\u002F540\u002F1*JqYMhNX6KNNb2UlqGqO2WQ.png","width":540,"height":108}}},"7b6769f2748b":{"name":"Marker","data":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","ethicsPolicy":"https:\u002F\u002Fhelp.medium.com\u002Fhc\u002Fen-us\u002Farticles\u002F360043290473","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fcdn-images-1.medium.com\u002Fmax\u002F383\u002F1*haCUs0wF6TgOOvfoY-jEoQ@2x.png","width":383,"height":92}}},"444d13b52878":{"name":"OneZero","data":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","ethicsPolicy":"https:\u002F\u002Fhelp.medium.com\u002Fhc\u002Fen-us\u002Farticles\u002F360043290473","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fmiro.medium.com\u002Fmax\u002F540\u002F1*cw32fIqCbRWzwJaoQw6BUg.png","width":540,"height":123}}},"8ccfed20cbb2":{"name":"Zora","data":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","ethicsPolicy":"https:\u002F\u002Fhelp.medium.com\u002Fhc\u002Fen-us\u002Farticles\u002F360043290473","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https:\u002F\u002Fmiro.medium.com\u002Fmax\u002F540\u002F1*tZUQqRcCCZDXjjiZ4bDvgQ.png","width":540,"height":106}}}},"embeddedPostIds":{"coronavirus":"cd3010f9d81f"},"sharedCdcMessaging":{"COVID_APPLICABLE_TAG_SLUGS":[],"COVID_APPLICABLE_TOPIC_NAMES":[],"COVID_APPLICABLE_TOPIC_NAMES_FOR_TOPIC_PAGE":[],"COVID_MESSAGES":{"tierA":{"text":"For more information on the novel coronavirus and Covid-19, visit cdc.gov.","markups":[{"start":66,"end":73,"href":"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.cdc.gov\u002Fcoronavirus\u002F2019-nCoV"}]},"tierB":{"text":"Anyone can publish on Medium per our Policies, but we don’t fact-check every story. For more info about the coronavirus, see cdc.gov.","markups":[{"start":37,"end":45,"href":"https:\u002F\u002Fhelp.medium.com\u002Fhc\u002Fen-us\u002Fcategories\u002F201931128-Policies-Safety"},{"start":125,"end":132,"href":"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.cdc.gov\u002Fcoronavirus\u002F2019-nCoV"}]},"paywall":{"text":"This article has been made free for everyone, thanks to Medium Members. For more information on the novel coronavirus and Covid-19, visit cdc.gov.","markups":[{"start":56,"end":70,"href":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002Fmembership"},{"start":138,"end":145,"href":"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.cdc.gov\u002Fcoronavirus\u002F2019-nCoV"}]},"unbound":{"text":"This article is free for everyone, thanks to Medium Members. For more information on the novel coronavirus and Covid-19, visit cdc.gov.","markups":[{"start":45,"end":59,"href":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002Fmembership"},{"start":127,"end":134,"href":"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.cdc.gov\u002Fcoronavirus\u002F2019-nCoV"}]}},"COVID_BANNER_POST_ID_OVERRIDE_WHITELIST":["3b31a67bff4a"]},"sharedVoteMessaging":{"TAGS":["politics","election-2020","government","us-politics","election","2020-presidential-race","trump","donald-trump","democrats","republicans","congress","republican-party","democratic-party","biden","joe-biden","maga"],"TOPICS":["politics","election"],"MESSAGE":{"text":"Find out more about the U.S. election results here.","markups":[{"start":46,"end":50,"href":"https:\u002F\u002Fcookpolitical.com\u002F2020-national-popular-vote-tracker"}]},"EXCLUDE_POSTS":["397ef29e3ca5"]},"embedPostRules":[],"recircOptions":{"v1":{"limit":3},"v2":{"limit":8}},"braintreeClientKey":"production_zjkj96jm_m56f8fqpf7ngnrd4","braintree":{"enabled":true,"merchantId":"m56f8fqpf7ngnrd4","merchantAccountId":{"usd":"AMediumCorporation_instant","eur":"amediumcorporation_EUR","cad":"amediumcorporation_CAD"},"publicKey":"ds2nn34bg2z7j5gd","braintreeEnvironment":"production","dashboardUrl":"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.braintreegateway.com\u002Fmerchants","gracePeriodDurationInDays":14,"mediumMembershipPlanId":{"monthly":"ce105f8c57a3","monthlyV2":"e8a5e126-792b-4ee6-8fba-d574c1b02fc5","monthlyWithTrial":"d5ee3dbe3db8","monthlyPremium":"fa741a9b47a2","yearly":"a40ad4a43185","yearlyV2":"3815d7d6-b8ca-4224-9b8c-182f9047866e","yearlyStaff":"d74fb811198a","yearlyWithTrial":"b3bc7350e5c7","yearlyPremium":"e21bd2c12166","monthlyOneYearFree":"e6c0637a-2bad-4171-ab4f-3c268633d83c","monthly25PercentOffFirstYear":"235ecc62-0cdb-49ae-9378-726cd21c504b","monthly20PercentOffFirstYear":"ba518864-9c13-4a99-91ca-411bf0cac756","monthly15PercentOffFirstYear":"594c029b-9f89-43d5-88f8-8173af4e070e","monthly10PercentOffFirstYear":"c6c7bc9a-40f2-4b51-8126-e28511d5bdb0","monthlyForStudents":"629ebe51-da7d-41fd-8293-34cd2f2030a8","yearlyOneYearFree":"78ba7be9-0d9f-4ece-aa3e-b54b826f2bf1","yearly25PercentOffFirstYear":"2dbb010d-bb8f-4eeb-ad5c-a08509f42d34","yearly20PercentOffFirstYear":"47565488-435b-47f8-bf93-40d5fbe0ebc8","yearly15PercentOffFirstYear":"8259809b-0881-47d9-acf7-6c001c7f720f","yearly10PercentOffFirstYear":"9dd694fb-96e1-472c-8d9e-3c868d5c1506","yearlyForStudents":"e29345ef-ab1c-4234-95c5-70e50fe6bc23","monthlyCad":"p52orjkaceei","yearlyCad":"h4q9g2up9ktt"},"braintreeDiscountId":{"oneMonthFree":"MONTHS_FREE_01","threeMonthsFree":"MONTHS_FREE_03","sixMonthsFree":"MONTHS_FREE_06","fiftyPercentOffOneYear":"FIFTY_PERCENT_OFF_ONE_YEAR"},"3DSecureVersion":"2","defaultCurrency":"usd","providerPlanIdCurrency":{"4ycw":"usd","rz3b":"usd","3kqm":"usd","jzw6":"usd","c2q2":"usd","nnsw":"usd","q8qw":"usd","d9y6":"usd","fx7w":"cad","nwf2":"cad"}},"paypalClientId":"AXj1G4fotC2GE8KzWX9mSxCH1wmPE3nJglf4Z2ig_amnhvlMVX87otaq58niAg9iuLktVNF_1WCMnN7v","paypal":{"host":"https:\u002F\u002Fapi.paypal.com:443","clientMode":"production","serverMode":"live","webhookId":"4G466076A0294510S","monthlyPlan":{"planId":"P-9WR0658853113943TMU5FDQA","name":"Medium Membership (Monthly) with setup fee","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Membership billed monthly."},"yearlyPlan":{"planId":"P-7N8963881P8875835MU5JOPQ","name":"Medium Membership (Annual) with setup fee","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Membership billed annually."},"oneYearGift":{"name":"Medium Membership (1 Year, Digital Gift Code)","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Gift codes can be redeemed at medium.com\u002Fredeem.","price":"50.00","currency":"USD","sku":"membership-gift-1-yr"},"oldMonthlyPlan":{"planId":"P-96U02458LM656772MJZUVH2Y","name":"Medium Membership (Monthly)","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Membership billed monthly."},"oldYearlyPlan":{"planId":"P-59P80963JF186412JJZU3SMI","name":"Medium Membership (Annual)","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Membership billed annually."},"monthlyPlanWithTrial":{"planId":"P-66C21969LR178604GJPVKUKY","name":"Medium Membership (Monthly) with setup fee","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Membership billed monthly."},"yearlyPlanWithTrial":{"planId":"P-6XW32684EX226940VKCT2MFA","name":"Medium Membership (Annual) with setup fee","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Membership billed annually."},"oldMonthlyPlanNoSetupFee":{"planId":"P-4N046520HR188054PCJC7LJI","name":"Medium Membership (Monthly)","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Membership billed monthly."},"oldYearlyPlanNoSetupFee":{"planId":"P-7A4913502Y5181304CJEJMXQ","name":"Medium Membership (Annual)","description":"Unlimited access to the best and brightest stories on Medium. Membership billed annually."},"sdkUrl":"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.paypal.com\u002Fsdk\u002Fjs"},"stripePublishableKey":"pk_live_7FReX44VnNIInZwrIIx6ghjl","log":{"json":true,"level":"info"},"imageUploadMaxSizeMb":25,"staffPicks":{"title":"Staff Picks","catalogId":"c7bc6e1ee00f"}},"session":{"xsrf":""}}</script><script>window.__APOLLO_STATE__ = {"ROOT_QUERY":{"__typename":"Query","viewer":null,"collectionByDomainOrSlug({\"domainOrSlug\":\"middle-pause\"})":{"__ref":"Collection:22bdccd3fa4"},"postResult({\"id\":\"cef7bf43c056\"})":{"__ref":"Post:cef7bf43c056"}},"ImageMetadata:":{"__typename":"ImageMetadata","id":""},"Collection:22bdccd3fa4":{"__typename":"Collection","id":"22bdccd3fa4","favicon":{"__ref":"ImageMetadata:"},"customStyleSheet":null,"colorPalette":{"__typename":"ColorPalette","highlightSpectrum":{"__typename":"ColorSpectrum","backgroundColor":"#FFFFFFFF","colorPoints":[{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFFCF3C8","point":0},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFFBF1BF","point":0.1},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFFBEFB5","point":0.2},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFFAEDAC","point":0.3},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFF9EBA3","point":0.4},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFF9E999","point":0.5},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFF8E790","point":0.6},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFF8E587","point":0.7},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFF7E37D","point":0.8},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFF6E173","point":0.9},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFF6DF6A","point":1}]},"defaultBackgroundSpectrum":{"__typename":"ColorSpectrum","backgroundColor":"#FFFFFFFF","colorPoints":[{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF9B8200","point":0},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF907900","point":0.1},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF847000","point":0.2},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF796700","point":0.3},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF6D5D02","point":0.4},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF615308","point":0.5},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF54490B","point":0.6},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF483E0C","point":0.7},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF3A330B","point":0.8},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF2D2709","point":0.9},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF1E1A06","point":1}]},"tintBackgroundSpectrum":{"__typename":"ColorSpectrum","backgroundColor":"#FFF7DA42","colorPoints":[{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFF7DA42","point":0},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFE6CA33","point":0.1},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFD5BA22","point":0.2},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFC4A909","point":0.3},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FFB29800","point":0.4},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF9F8600","point":0.5},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF8C7300","point":0.6},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF786000","point":0.7},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF624C00","point":0.8},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF4A3600","point":0.9},{"__typename":"ColorPoint","color":"#FF2F1E00","point":1}]}},"domain":null,"slug":"middle-pause","googleAnalyticsId":null,"editors":[{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:22ec1fce9d86"}},{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:18f37753fd90"}},{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:39816c8fc9f6"}},{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:66f4ee260772"}},{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:ef7f43a2dd62"}},{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:d5700e8fad77"}},{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:56bba75e2125"}},{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:584d2a80bcc8"}},{"__typename":"CollectionMastheadUserItem","user":{"__ref":"User:11da2969b61e"}}],"name":"Middle-Pause","avatar":{"__ref":"ImageMetadata:1*k6adZm3uTGISccg7GHzyVQ.png"},"description":"We are the voices of women who encourage, inspire, and empower each other to live lives of meaning and purpose. We are women in the middle.","subscriberCount":4484,"latestPostsConnection({\"paging\":{\"limit\":1}})":{"__typename":"PostConnection","posts":[{"__ref":"Post:a8fd27e85c81"}]},"viewerEdge":{"__ref":"CollectionViewerEdge:collectionId:22bdccd3fa4-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6"},"twitterUsername":"debbiewalker59","facebookPageId":null,"logo":{"__ref":"ImageMetadata:1*IaIWpziUw2TloxAUDM2HLg.png"}},"User:22ec1fce9d86":{"__typename":"User","id":"22ec1fce9d86"},"User:18f37753fd90":{"__typename":"User","id":"18f37753fd90"},"User:39816c8fc9f6":{"__typename":"User","id":"39816c8fc9f6"},"User:66f4ee260772":{"__typename":"User","id":"66f4ee260772"},"User:ef7f43a2dd62":{"__typename":"User","id":"ef7f43a2dd62"},"User:d5700e8fad77":{"__typename":"User","id":"d5700e8fad77"},"User:56bba75e2125":{"__typename":"User","id":"56bba75e2125"},"User:584d2a80bcc8":{"__typename":"User","id":"584d2a80bcc8"},"User:11da2969b61e":{"__typename":"User","id":"11da2969b61e"},"ImageMetadata:1*k6adZm3uTGISccg7GHzyVQ.png":{"__typename":"ImageMetadata","id":"1*k6adZm3uTGISccg7GHzyVQ.png"},"User:44baae7076b2":{"__typename":"User","id":"44baae7076b2","customDomainState":null,"hasSubdomain":false,"username":"ljstratton50"},"Post:a8fd27e85c81":{"__typename":"Post","id":"a8fd27e85c81","firstPublishedAt":1732978935738,"creator":{"__ref":"User:44baae7076b2"},"collection":{"__ref":"Collection:22bdccd3fa4"},"isSeries":false,"mediumUrl":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002Fmiddle-pause\u002Fplease-no-more-scented-candles-a8fd27e85c81","sequence":null,"uniqueSlug":"please-no-more-scented-candles-a8fd27e85c81"},"LinkedAccounts:1bb3a96aae15":{"__typename":"LinkedAccounts","mastodon":null,"id":"1bb3a96aae15"},"UserViewerEdge:userId:1bb3a96aae15-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6":{"__typename":"UserViewerEdge","id":"userId:1bb3a96aae15-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6","isFollowing":false,"isUser":false,"isMuting":false},"NewsletterV3:f14be77ced2d":{"__typename":"NewsletterV3","id":"f14be77ced2d","type":"NEWSLETTER_TYPE_AUTHOR","slug":"1bb3a96aae15","name":"1bb3a96aae15","collection":null,"user":{"__ref":"User:1bb3a96aae15"}},"User:1bb3a96aae15":{"__typename":"User","id":"1bb3a96aae15","name":"LaShell Tinder","username":"lashelltinder","newsletterV3":{"__ref":"NewsletterV3:f14be77ced2d"},"linkedAccounts":{"__ref":"LinkedAccounts:1bb3a96aae15"},"isSuspended":false,"imageId":"1*Vh8dSpXyXJfD8XzjewhURA.jpeg","mediumMemberAt":1702303174000,"verifications":{"__typename":"VerifiedInfo","isBookAuthor":false},"socialStats":{"__typename":"SocialStats","followerCount":700,"followingCount":150,"collectionFollowingCount":20},"customDomainState":null,"hasSubdomain":false,"bio":"Exploring avocation as a writer after spending nearly 30 years as career expatriate and professional in global mobility. Insta @patacaliente1963\u002F","isPartnerProgramEnrolled":true,"viewerEdge":{"__ref":"UserViewerEdge:userId:1bb3a96aae15-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6"},"viewerIsUser":false,"postSubscribeMembershipUpsellShownAt":0,"membership":{"__ref":"Membership:bafe9f61522c"},"allowNotes":true,"twitterScreenName":""},"Membership:bafe9f61522c":{"__typename":"Membership","tier":"FRIEND","id":"bafe9f61522c"},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_0":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_0","name":"c63a","type":"H3","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"Fond Memories of a Gentle Soul","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_1":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_1","name":"ecee","type":"H4","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"Salvation comes unexpectedly","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"ImageMetadata:0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP":{"__typename":"ImageMetadata","id":"0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP","originalHeight":1218,"originalWidth":1600,"focusPercentX":null,"focusPercentY":null,"alt":"on the left is a sculptured head of Carolina, the heroine of the story. on the right is a photo of her holding a teddy bear. She’s an Argentinean woman in her 70s."},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_2":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_2","name":"3284","type":"IMG","href":null,"layout":"INSET_CENTER","metadata":{"__ref":"ImageMetadata:0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP"},"text":"A bust of Carolina completed by my cousin in her first year of art school.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_3":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_3","name":"d60e","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"At twenty-three, I had an Uncle Sam shotgun wedding to a foreign national. We were in love but sped up the process so that he could seek employment.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_4":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_4","name":"30fe","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"Two and a half years later, I met the extended family.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_5":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_5","name":"8103","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"I remember regularly feeling overwhelmed because I lacked fluency in Spanish. Our youngest was only sixteen months which also kept me quite busy during our trip to Argentina in 1989 for the holidays.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_6":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_6","name":"71a5","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"After celebrating Christmas with my then-husband’s parents and his father’s side of the family, we drove to Rio Segundo to spend New Year’s with his mom’s side of the family.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_7":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_7","name":"391c","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"Our car was 100 yards from the carport when people streamed out of the youngest sibling (Tia Moni)’s tiny house to greet us. Tia Moni’s four daughters, the spouse of the eldest, her husband, and their live-in nanny\u002Fmaid waited anxiously for us to park so they could engulf us with hugs. People talked loudly to be heard above the barking dogs in all the ensuing excitement.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_8":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_8","name":"c935","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"I can’t recall what the cousins called the nearly toothless woman with gray hair and oversized facial features that seemed to weigh down her tiny frame. Perhaps I blocked it from my memory because I thought the word — a pseudonym for an uneducated individual — was rude.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_9":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_9","name":"42d5","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"At the time, I didn’t understand the culture around nicknames and the practice of using them without bad intentions. Later, as I assimilated into the culture and people, I understood that references to characteristics that I found offensive were often used as terms of endearment.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_10":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_10","name":"439f","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"I also got to know the family and extended members quite well. They became my family — my second home.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_11":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_11","name":"9a7e","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"The youngest of twelve, Carolina grew up in a household lacking in love, surrounded by abusive siblings and a distant father who served in WWI. Schooling was deemed unnecessary for the female children.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_12":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_12","name":"2e42","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"By the time I met her during my first visit, Carolina was in her 70s. She moved about her day, casually sipping maté with us and sharing in the banter. Although she was paid to work, her cheerful presence felt more like a grandmother helping out.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[{"__typename":"Markup","type":"EM","start":112,"end":116,"href":null,"anchorType":null,"userId":null,"linkMetadata":null}],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_13":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_13","name":"54ff","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"When Tia Moni was pregnant with her fourth child, Carolina, who was 60 years old, came to the Granja family as the maid and nanny. It was a busy house with three girls under six years of age.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_14":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_14","name":"7459","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"Despite her aging body, she managed daily household chores with surprising strength. She reminded me of the small-framed farm women I knew growing up in Missouri, hard work reflected in their oversized hands, calloused and weathered.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_15":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_15","name":"7806","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"Years later, when I saw Carolina's bust displayed in Maria Noel’s home, it took me back to that first visit and my fondness for the gentle woman.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_16":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_16","name":"f4e7","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"My cousin was able to render a wonderful likeness of Carolina because of the deep bond they shared. Although Carolina loved the entire family, it was the youngest who captured Carolina’s heart and the one she had a lasting impact upon.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_17":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_17","name":"225d","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"While talking about making the bust in art school, Maria Noel recalled how she played “teacher” as a first grader. She worked diligently with Carolina, teaching her how to write her name.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_18":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_18","name":"8c71","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"They swapped caregiving roles as Carolina aged. Carolina was Maria Noel’s nanny, mother, and grandmother until she became the ‘daughter’ when Carolina could no longer take care of herself. Carolina died April 13, 2006, at 87 years old, with Maria Noel by her side.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_19":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_19","name":"9f81","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"Carolina experienced salvation for a life that had been marked by so much cruelty and invisibility. Maria Noel and Carolina shared a genuine love, one that was closer than that shared with their own families.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_20":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_20","name":"feaf","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"Maria Noel and her family gave this beautiful soul a life she never could have dreamed of, one where she was loved, protected, and appreciated.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_21":{"__typename":"Paragraph","id":"107b6ab8e330_21","name":"1216","type":"P","href":null,"layout":null,"metadata":null,"text":"As an artist, Maria Noel captured the finest details of Carolina, including her wrinkled hands and stiff fingers — a reflection of someone who had experienced a difficult life. Part of the fond memories I have of Carolina include those hands. \n\n\nThank you, Marilyn, for your lovely editing support! Thank you Medium community for reading this tribute to Carolina.","hasDropCap":null,"dropCapImage":null,"markups":[{"__typename":"Markup","type":"EM","start":246,"end":363,"href":null,"anchorType":null,"userId":null,"linkMetadata":null}],"codeBlockMetadata":null,"iframe":null,"mixtapeMetadata":null},"CollectionViewerEdge:collectionId:22bdccd3fa4-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6":{"__typename":"CollectionViewerEdge","id":"collectionId:22bdccd3fa4-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6","isEditor":false,"isMuting":false},"ImageMetadata:1*IaIWpziUw2TloxAUDM2HLg.png":{"__typename":"ImageMetadata","id":"1*IaIWpziUw2TloxAUDM2HLg.png","originalWidth":3000,"originalHeight":3000},"PostViewerEdge:postId:cef7bf43c056-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6":{"__typename":"PostViewerEdge","shouldIndexPostForExternalSearch":true,"id":"postId:cef7bf43c056-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6"},"Tag:redemption":{"__typename":"Tag","id":"redemption","displayTitle":"Redemption","normalizedTagSlug":"redemption"},"Tag:uneducated":{"__typename":"Tag","id":"uneducated","displayTitle":"Uneducated","normalizedTagSlug":"uneducated"},"Tag:motherly-love":{"__typename":"Tag","id":"motherly-love","displayTitle":"Motherly Love","normalizedTagSlug":"motherly-love"},"Tag:caregiving":{"__typename":"Tag","id":"caregiving","displayTitle":"Caregiving","normalizedTagSlug":"caregiving"},"Tag:relationships":{"__typename":"Tag","id":"relationships","displayTitle":"Relationships","normalizedTagSlug":"relationships"},"Post:cef7bf43c056":{"__typename":"Post","id":"cef7bf43c056","collection":{"__ref":"Collection:22bdccd3fa4"},"content({\"postMeteringOptions\":{}})":{"__typename":"PostContent","isLockedPreviewOnly":false,"bodyModel":{"__typename":"RichText","sections":[{"__typename":"Section","name":"5973","startIndex":0,"textLayout":null,"imageLayout":null,"backgroundImage":null,"videoLayout":null,"backgroundVideo":null},{"__typename":"Section","name":"fc4d","startIndex":8,"textLayout":null,"imageLayout":null,"backgroundImage":null,"videoLayout":null,"backgroundVideo":null},{"__typename":"Section","name":"cf3c","startIndex":11,"textLayout":null,"imageLayout":null,"backgroundImage":null,"videoLayout":null,"backgroundVideo":null},{"__typename":"Section","name":"5ee6","startIndex":15,"textLayout":null,"imageLayout":null,"backgroundImage":null,"videoLayout":null,"backgroundVideo":null}],"paragraphs":[{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_0"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_1"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_2"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_3"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_4"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_5"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_6"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_7"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_8"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_9"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_10"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_11"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_12"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_13"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_14"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_15"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_16"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_17"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_18"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_19"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_20"},{"__ref":"Paragraph:107b6ab8e330_21"}]},"validatedShareKey":"","shareKeyCreator":null},"creator":{"__ref":"User:1bb3a96aae15"},"inResponseToEntityType":null,"isLocked":false,"isMarkedPaywallOnly":false,"lockedSource":"LOCKED_POST_SOURCE_NONE","mediumUrl":"https:\u002F\u002Fmedium.com\u002Fmiddle-pause\u002Fredemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056","primaryTopic":null,"topics":[{"__typename":"Topic","slug":"family"}],"isPublished":true,"latestPublishedVersion":"107b6ab8e330","visibility":"PUBLIC","postResponses":{"__typename":"PostResponses","count":3},"clapCount":152,"allowResponses":true,"isLimitedState":false,"title":"Redemption Comes Unexpectedly","isSeries":false,"sequence":null,"uniqueSlug":"redemption-comes-unexpectedly-cef7bf43c056","socialTitle":"","socialDek":"","canonicalUrl":"","metaDescription":"","latestPublishedAt":1732741328102,"readingTime":2.879245283018868,"previewContent":{"__typename":"PreviewContent","subtitle":"Fond memories of a gentle soul"},"previewImage":{"__ref":"ImageMetadata:0*eutM_p0cAm8B1iNP"},"isShortform":false,"seoTitle":"","firstPublishedAt":1732741328102,"updatedAt":1732762243098,"shortformType":"SHORTFORM_TYPE_LINK","seoDescription":"","viewerEdge":{"__ref":"PostViewerEdge:postId:cef7bf43c056-viewerId:lo_87a6c8fdbcc6"},"isSuspended":false,"license":"ALL_RIGHTS_RESERVED","tags":[{"__ref":"Tag:redemption"},{"__ref":"Tag:uneducated"},{"__ref":"Tag:motherly-love"},{"__ref":"Tag:caregiving"},{"__ref":"Tag:relationships"}],"isNewsletter":false,"statusForCollection":"APPROVED","pendingCollection":null,"detectedLanguage":"en","wordCount":710,"layerCake":0,"responsesLocked":false}}</script><script>window.__MIDDLEWARE_STATE__={"session":{"xsrf":""},"cache":{"cacheStatus":"HIT"}}</script><script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/manifest.bbe4ab66.js"></script><script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/9865.1496d74a.js"></script><script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/main.bbe47cad.js"></script><script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/instrumentation.d9108df7.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/reporting.ff22a7a5.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/9120.5df29668.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/5049.d1ead72d.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/4810.6318add7.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/6618.db187378.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/2707.b0942613.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/9977.5b3eb23a.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/8599.1ab63137.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/5250.9f9e01d2.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/5787.e66a3a4d.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/2648.26563adf.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/8393.826a25fb.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/7549.2176f21f.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/6589.7c500280.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/3735.afb7e926.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/5642.0a97706a.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/6546.cd03f950.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/6834.08de95de.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/7346.72622eb9.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/2420.2a5e2d95.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/839.ca7937c2.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/7975.d195c6f1.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/7394.bf599bc5.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/2961.00a48598.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/8204.c4082863.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/4391.59acaed3.chunk.js"></script> <script src="https://cdn-client.medium.com/lite/static/js/PostPage.MainContent.902ad94b.chunk.js"></script><script>window.main();</script><script>(function(){function c(){var b=a.contentDocument||a.contentWindow.document;if(b){var d=b.createElement('script');d.innerHTML="window.__CF$cv$params={r:'8eb047593e7ea090',t:'MTczMzAyNjc2NC4wMDAwMDA='};var a=document.createElement('script');a.nonce='';a.src='/cdn-cgi/challenge-platform/scripts/jsd/main.js';document.getElementsByTagName('head')[0].appendChild(a);";b.getElementsByTagName('head')[0].appendChild(d)}}if(document.body){var a=document.createElement('iframe');a.height=1;a.width=1;a.style.position='absolute';a.style.top=0;a.style.left=0;a.style.border='none';a.style.visibility='hidden';document.body.appendChild(a);if('loading'!==document.readyState)c();else if(window.addEventListener)document.addEventListener('DOMContentLoaded',c);else{var e=document.onreadystatechange||function(){};document.onreadystatechange=function(b){e(b);'loading'!==document.readyState&&(document.onreadystatechange=e,c())}}}})();</script></body></html>