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<!doctype html><html lang="en"><head><title data-rh="true">The Thanksgiving I Banned ‘Should’ Forever | by Amy G. 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https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:750/1*SMRRYs_7m-Cb5rQ1A7zpkQ.jpeg 750w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:786/1*SMRRYs_7m-Cb5rQ1A7zpkQ.jpeg 786w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:828/1*SMRRYs_7m-Cb5rQ1A7zpkQ.jpeg 828w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:1100/1*SMRRYs_7m-Cb5rQ1A7zpkQ.jpeg 1100w, https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:1400/1*SMRRYs_7m-Cb5rQ1A7zpkQ.jpeg 1400w" sizes="(min-resolution: 4dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 50vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 4) and (max-width: 700px) 50vw, (min-resolution: 3dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 67vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 3) and (max-width: 700px) 65vw, (min-resolution: 2.5dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 80vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 2.5) and (max-width: 700px) 80vw, (min-resolution: 2dppx) and (max-width: 700px) 100vw, (-webkit-min-device-pixel-ratio: 2) and (max-width: 700px) 100vw, 700px"/><img alt="A dinner plate is shown filled with Korean fried chicken, dumplings, kimchi and pickled radish while a fireplace blazes in the background." class="bh mv ob c" width="700" height="700" loading="eager"/></picture></div></div><figcaption class="oc ff od no np oe of bf b bg z du">My unconventional Thanksgiving meal of Korean fried chicken, dumplings, and kimchi. (Photo by Amy G. Park)</figcaption></figure><p id="fbe1" class="pw-post-body-paragraph og oh hd oi b hx oj ok ol ia om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow ox oy oz pa pb gw bk">Holidays had been hard since the divorce. On the eve of my fourth Thanksgiving as a single woman, I expected to have it together. Instead, the day would teach me a powerful lesson about authenticity.</p><p id="95d0" class="pw-post-body-paragraph og oh hd oi b hx oj ok ol ia om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow ox oy oz pa pb gw bk"><em class="pc">Thuds</em> on the floor above pulled me from a fitful sleep that Thanksgiving morning. It may have been a holiday, but my son was getting ready for work. I lay there listening to his movements, knowing now that he’d entered the workforce, our holidays were changing again.</p><p id="f088" class="pw-post-body-paragraph og oh hd oi b hx oj ok ol ia om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow ox oy oz pa pb gw bk">As soon as the front door closed half an hour later, I buried my head in my pillow as a sob erupted from me.</p><p id="e13a" class="pw-post-body-paragraph og oh hd oi b hx oj ok ol ia om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow ox oy oz pa pb gw bk">The suddenness of this tear fest surprised me, as did its lengthy stay. Hours later, the sadness continued to wash over me like the tide, ebbing and flowing in waves of varying sizes.</p><p id="2b3c" class="pw-post-body-paragraph og oh hd oi b hx oj ok ol ia om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow ox oy oz pa pb gw bk">I tried reversing my emotions. Set to spend the evening with a friend and her family, I needed the crying to stop. I took a shower. I put together my outfit for the day. I read a book. Nothing seemed to work.</p><p id="31f4" class="pw-post-body-paragraph og oh hd oi b hx oj ok ol ia om on oo op oq or os ot ou ov ow ox oy oz pa pb gw bk">How could I spend time with this lovely family when I couldn’t stop crying? Finally, at midday, I considered my options. I could cancel and stay home. 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