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dateTime="2024-10-19T18:30:00+10:00">October 19, 2024 — 6.30pm</time></span></div></div></div></div></header><section class="_3OhA4 Lspjx"><div class="_2h56q _2bGxr"><div class="_3J1te"><div class="_3kTtc"> <span class="_2xetH"><time class="_2_zR-" data-testid="datetime" dateTime="2024-10-19T18:30:00+10:00">October 19, 2024 — 6.30pm</time></span></div></div></div><div class="_2CSKo noPrint"><div class="_1KqZ_"><div class="hLTvJ"><button aria-checked="false" aria-describedby="saveTooltip" aria-label="Save article to read later" class="_31ZN0" role="switch" type="button"><svg aria-hidden="true" class="QMY9O _11R7m" focusable="false" height="1em" width="1em"><use xlink:href="#icon-save"></use></svg><span class="_3-fU6">Save</span></button><div aria-hidden="true" class="_1lwFz uXbxr" id="saveTooltip" role="tooltip"><button>Log in</button>, <a data-testid="login-register" 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data-ffx-event-category="component" data-ffx-event-label="font size large" data-ffx-event-value="0" data-ffx-hittype="event">Larger text size</button><button class="_3VkdU" data-ffx-event-action="cta click" data-ffx-event-category="component" data-ffx-event-label="font size extra large" data-ffx-event-value="0" data-ffx-hittype="event">Very large text size</button></div></div></div></div></section><section class="_1Rw6X" data-testid="article-body-top"><aside class="_2GZaf"><div class="_1q-_I _3sCHz"><div class="container"><div class="adWrapper _2UMq- noPrint" data-testid="ad"><small class="_3ToRr">Advertisement</small><div class="" id="adspot-160x600_300x250_300x600-pos2-desktop"></div></div></div></div></aside><div class="_1ysFk" data-testid="article-body"><div><div class="_5JLqO"><div class="_1Ld7U" id="beyondwords-player"></div><div class="_3Fhwk" data-testid="showPlayerOverlay"></div></div><div class="_1665V _2q-Vk" data-testid="body-content"><p>It’s always strange to bump into someone from a specific part of your life out of context as if you’ve accidentally pierced a hole in the matrix. When I was younger, it would break my mind if I ran into a school teacher at the grocery store. What are you doing here, Mrs Miller? You only exist at school. Put the basket down and return to the classroom at once!</p><p>It doesn’t really change that much as you get older. Seeing work colleagues on the weekend, living their weekend lives feels wrong. The same goes for anyone you know from the gym. Have you ever seen a gym-only acquaintance not sweating and wearing civilian clothes? Bizarre.</p><figure class="_3ujPS _3x3-4 RMwbY _2XZQH" data-testid="image"><div aria-label="enlarge image" class="_1lwW_" role="button" tabindex="0"><picture class=""><source media="(min-width: 1024px)" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.738%2C$multiply_0.9788%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/064f14e01e76b029a6ae9eaf06198f0fcbee052c, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.738%2C$multiply_1.9577%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/064f14e01e76b029a6ae9eaf06198f0fcbee052c 2x" height="494" width="740"/><source media="(min-width: 768px)" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.738%2C$multiply_1.0159%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/064f14e01e76b029a6ae9eaf06198f0fcbee052c, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.738%2C$multiply_2.0317%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/064f14e01e76b029a6ae9eaf06198f0fcbee052c 2x" height="512" width="768"/><img alt=" In the cutthroat suburban cafe scene, the opening of a new option presents a tricky choice for loyal locals. " src="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.738%2C$multiply_0.7725%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/064f14e01e76b029a6ae9eaf06198f0fcbee052c" height="390" width="584" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.738%2C$multiply_0.7725%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/064f14e01e76b029a6ae9eaf06198f0fcbee052c, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.738%2C$multiply_1.545%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/064f14e01e76b029a6ae9eaf06198f0fcbee052c 2x"/></picture></div><figcaption class="_3CZmy"><p><span class="_2Li3P"> In the cutthroat suburban cafe scene, the opening of a new option presents a tricky choice for loyal locals. </span><cite class="ojLwA"><span class="_30ROC">Credit: </span>Michael Howard</cite></p></figcaption></figure><p>Walking the frozen food aisle at Coles last week, I was confused when a big, burly man strolled right up to me and asked, “Where have you been lately?” Immediately, I knew that I knew him but could not pinpoint where I knew him from.</p><p>It wasn’t until he muttered something about coming by for coffee that it clicked into place. He owned the local cafe, and I had, in fact, been avoiding him.</p></div><div class="_1lC_G"></div><div class="_1665V _2q-Vk" data-testid="body-content"><p>Until a couple of months ago, it had been my favourite cafe in the area, possibly the world. They did everything a cafe is supposed to do to foster fondness, including memorising my order and using my name enough times that I felt like a minor celebrity. “Look who it is, it’s Thomas! Good to see you, Mr Mitchell; one flat white coming right up for Thomas!”</p><p>But then a new place opened two doors down, and unfortunately, it was better in every way. The coffee was tastier, the decor cooler, the food fresher, the vibes higher, and background music less annoying. Perhaps most importantly, the new place didn’t give you the bathroom key attached to a giant spatula and send you 100 metres <i>up </i>a hill to an outhouse. Instead, they just had standard on-premises restrooms with regular locks.</p><p>Basically, in every comparable facet, it was a step up from the other place, which should’ve been welcome news were it not for a crippling case of cafe-guilt. You see, the decision to stray initially began with the best intentions. My wife, Kate, and I love our local, of course, but in the interest of fairness, we felt obliged to try the new joint – a show of support in the form of two coffees and a pastry.</p><p>We would visit once and welcome them to the neighbourhood, and that would be that. But then the pastry was so light and buttery, the coffee smooth and well-roasted. When they gifted us an almond croissant – a perfect balance of flakes on top and filling inside – I suspected the damage was done.</p></div></div></div></section><div class="_1FVfK"><div class="container"><div class="adWrapper _2UMq- noPrint" data-testid="ad"><small class="_3ToRr">Advertisement</small><div class="" id="adspot-728x90_970x250-pos3-desktop"></div></div></div></div><section class="vPaWe" data-testid="article-body-bottom"><div class="_1ysFk"><div><div class="_1665V _2q-Vk" data-testid="body-content"><p>One visit turned into two, which turned into breakfast, which meant we had to come back and sample the lunch menu. Before long, we were inventing reasons to return – “The other place looks so crowded!” – but consciously parking miles away and taking the backstreets so we wouldn’t be spotted.</p><p>With sunglasses on and caps pulled low, we would slink into the cafe, high on the thrill of avoiding detection for another day.</p><figure class="_3ujPS _3x3-4 RMwbY _2XZQH" data-testid="image"><div aria-label="enlarge image" class="_1lwW_" role="button" tabindex="0"><picture class=""><source media="(min-width: 1024px)" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.378%2C$multiply_0.9788%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.378%2C$multiply_1.9577%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d 2x" height="494" width="740"/><source media="(min-width: 768px)" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.378%2C$multiply_1.0159%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.378%2C$multiply_2.0317%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d 2x" height="512" width="768"/><img alt="This charming Parisian cafe is not my local, but if it were I’d probably never abandon it (unless something better came along). " loading="lazy" src="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.378%2C$multiply_0.7725%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d" height="390" width="584" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.378%2C$multiply_0.7725%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.378%2C$multiply_1.545%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d 2x"/></picture></div><figcaption class="_3CZmy"><p><span class="_2Li3P">This charming Parisian cafe is not my local, but if it were I’d probably never abandon it (unless something better came along). </span><cite class="ojLwA"><span class="_30ROC">Credit: </span>Jan Wlodarczyk / Alamy Stock Photo</cite></p></figcaption></figure><p>Eventually, Kate’s guilt became too much, and she began to fret about the old cafe owner’s feelings, wondering aloud if he hated us. She decided he probably did and then decided she would rather a lifetime of inferior coffee than risk the possibility of a relative stranger being angry at her.</p><p>And so it was we found our way back to the original spot, which felt exactly like falling into bed with a lover you’d since moved on from – the flaws inescapable and everywhere. Nothing is charming about these milk crates for seats; they’re impractical and uncomfortable. Lounge music on Spotify in 2024? Spare me.</p></div><div class="_1lC_G"></div><div class="_1665V _2q-Vk" data-testid="body-content"><p>Every time I found myself trudging up the hill towards the bathroom, spatula-key in hand, I truly empathised with Sisyphus – bound to repeat this insane punishment for a lifetime.</p><p>Was I just bitter? Possibly. But not as bitter as the coffee they served from their old (and likely faulty) coffee machine. With each passing day, I witnessed the great migration, sheepish locals shuffling down the road while the rest of us wobbled awkwardly on crates, pretending everything was fine.</p><figure class="_3ujPS _3g3zI _4vIBa _2XZQH" data-testid="image"><div aria-label="enlarge image" class="_1lwW_" role="button" tabindex="0"><picture class=""><source media="(min-width: 1024px)" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.257%2C$multiply_0.6988%2C$ratio_1.776846%2C$width_1059%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/b416adb37a69abd303a9e8d79f0750e58a87614c, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.257%2C$multiply_1.3975%2C$ratio_1.776846%2C$width_1059%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/b416adb37a69abd303a9e8d79f0750e58a87614c 2x" height="417" width="740"/><source media="(min-width: 768px)" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.257%2C$multiply_0.7252%2C$ratio_1.776846%2C$width_1059%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/b416adb37a69abd303a9e8d79f0750e58a87614c, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.257%2C$multiply_1.4504%2C$ratio_1.776846%2C$width_1059%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/b416adb37a69abd303a9e8d79f0750e58a87614c 2x" height="433" width="768"/><img alt="In scenes reminiscent of Edward Hopper’s Nighthawks, my old cafe is sparsely populated. A few loyal souls sipping their brew. " loading="lazy" src="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.257%2C$multiply_0.5855%2C$ratio_1.776846%2C$width_1059%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/b416adb37a69abd303a9e8d79f0750e58a87614c" height="349" width="620" srcSet="https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.257%2C$multiply_0.5855%2C$ratio_1.776846%2C$width_1059%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_86%2Cf_auto/b416adb37a69abd303a9e8d79f0750e58a87614c, https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.257%2C$multiply_1.1709%2C$ratio_1.776846%2C$width_1059%2C$x_0%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/b416adb37a69abd303a9e8d79f0750e58a87614c 2x"/></picture></div><figcaption class="_3CZmy"><p><span class="_2Li3P">In scenes reminiscent of Edward Hopper’s Nighthawks, my old cafe is sparsely populated. A few loyal souls sipping their brew. </span><cite class="ojLwA"><span class="_30ROC">Credit: </span>VCG Wilson/Corbis via Getty Image</cite></p></figcaption></figure><p>A part of me felt sad, mostly about all the almond croissants I was missing, but also because the people had spoken, and the results were deafening. But then something remarkable happened, a handwritten sign promising salvation: <em>Cl</em><i>osed for renovations.</i></p><p>In an attempt to reverse its slide, the old cafe was giving itself an overhaul, a new fitout, a new menu, and new chairs. According to the unofficial rules of the suburban cafe scene, a shutdown grants clientele permission to look elsewhere without fear of punishment.</p></div><div class="_1lC_G"></div><div class="_1665V _2q-Vk" data-testid="body-content"><p>Finally, I was free to enjoy an almond croissant without feeling bad until Kate pointed out that we’d probably need to visit the old spot after the renovations. “You know, just to be supportive?”</p><p><em><b><strong>Find more of the author’s work <a href="https://www.smh.com.au/link/follow-20170101-p5e4ym">here</a>. Email him at <a href="mailto:thomas.mitchell@smh.com.au">thomas.mitchell@smh.com.au</a> or follow him on </strong></b></em><em><b><strong>Instagram at <a href="https://www.instagram.com/thomasalexandermitchell" rel="noopener" target="_blank">@thomasalexandermitchell</a> and on Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/_thmitchell" rel="noopener" target="_blank">@_thmitchell.</a></strong></b></em></p><p><b><i>Find out the next TV, streaming series and movies to add to your must-sees. </i></b><a href="https://www.theage.com.au/link/follow-20170101-p56jp0"><b><i>Get The Watchlist delivered every Thursday</i></b></a><b><i>.</i></b></p></div></div><div class="noPrint"><div></div><div></div></div><div id="embedded-feedback"></div><div class="_22FRK _2spQv"><section class="aKWhn noPrint" id="endOfArticle"><div class="dLGbc"><div class="hLTvJ"><button aria-checked="false" aria-describedby="saveTooltip" aria-label="Save article to read later" class="_31ZN0" role="switch" type="button"><svg 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best thing is the new place doesn\\u2019t give you the bathroom key attached to a giant spatula.\",\"allowComments\":true,\"body\":\"<p>It\\u2019s always strange to bump into someone from a specific part of your life out of context as if you\\u2019ve accidentally pierced a hole in the matrix. When I was younger, it would break my mind if I ran into a school teacher at the grocery store. What are you doing here, Mrs Miller? You only exist at school. Put the basket down and return to the classroom at once!</p><p>It doesn\\u2019t really change that much as you get older. Seeing work colleagues on the weekend, living their weekend lives feels wrong. The same goes for anyone you know from the gym. Have you ever seen a gym-only acquaintance not sweating and wearing civilian clothes? Bizarre.</p><x-placeholder id=\\\"c6ed0cf24cb691758ab06e3f2057635c28d3d7b4\\\"></x-placeholder><p>Walking the frozen food aisle at Coles last week, I was confused when a big, burly man strolled right up to me and asked, \\u201CWhere have you been lately?\\u201D Immediately, I knew that I knew him but could not pinpoint where I knew him from.</p><p>It wasn\\u2019t until he muttered something about coming by for coffee that it clicked into place. He owned the local cafe, and I had, in fact, been avoiding him.</p><p>Until a couple of months ago, it had been my favourite cafe in the area, possibly the world. They did everything a cafe is supposed to do to foster fondness, including memorising my order and using my name enough times that I felt like a minor celebrity. \\u201CLook who it is, it\\u2019s Thomas! Good to see you, Mr Mitchell; one flat white coming right up for Thomas!\\u201D</p><p>But then a new place opened two doors down, and unfortunately, it was better in every way. The coffee was tastier, the decor cooler, the food fresher, the vibes higher, and background music less annoying. Perhaps most importantly, the new place didn\\u2019t give you the bathroom key attached to a giant spatula and send you 100 metres <i>up </i>a hill to an outhouse. Instead, they just had standard on-premises restrooms with regular locks.</p><x-placeholder id=\\\"fa7918f612b03854ee42fed302cfc68f52b6587a\\\"></x-placeholder><p>Basically, in every comparable facet, it was a step up from the other place, which should\\u2019ve been welcome news were it not for a crippling case of cafe-guilt. You see, the decision to stray initially began with the best intentions. My wife, Kate, and I love our local, of course, but in the interest of fairness, we felt obliged to try the new joint \\u2013 a show of support in the form of two coffees and a pastry.</p><p>We would visit once and welcome them to the neighbourhood, and that would be that. But then the pastry was so light and buttery, the coffee smooth and well-roasted. When they gifted us an almond croissant \\u2013 a perfect balance of flakes on top and filling inside \\u2013 I suspected the damage was done.</p><p>One visit turned into two, which turned into breakfast, which meant we had to come back and sample the lunch menu. Before long, we were inventing reasons to return \\u2013 \\u201CThe other place looks so crowded!\\u201D \\u2013 but consciously parking miles away and taking the backstreets so we wouldn\\u2019t be spotted.</p><p>With sunglasses on and caps pulled low, we would slink into the cafe, high on the thrill of avoiding detection for another day.</p><x-placeholder id=\\\"4751f3ca35b3545b8582b64b3abd3d79528eafc4\\\"></x-placeholder><p>Eventually, Kate\\u2019s guilt became too much, and she began to fret about the old cafe owner\\u2019s feelings, wondering aloud if he hated us. She decided he probably did and then decided she would rather a lifetime of inferior coffee than risk the possibility of a relative stranger being angry at her.</p><p>And so it was we found our way back to the original spot, which felt exactly like falling into bed with a lover you\\u2019d since moved on from \\u2013 the flaws inescapable and everywhere. Nothing is charming about these milk crates for seats; they\\u2019re impractical and uncomfortable. Lounge music on Spotify in 2024? Spare me.</p><p>Every time I found myself trudging up the hill towards the bathroom, spatula-key in hand, I truly empathised with Sisyphus \\u2013 bound to repeat this insane punishment for a lifetime.</p><p>Was I just bitter? Possibly. But not as bitter as the coffee they served from their old (and likely faulty) coffee machine. With each passing day, I witnessed the great migration, sheepish locals shuffling down the road while the rest of us wobbled awkwardly on crates, pretending everything was fine.</p><x-placeholder id=\\\"899fbdd360724e76b9cf673dd5a73909a38c3354\\\"></x-placeholder><p>A part of me felt sad, mostly about all the almond croissants I was missing, but also because the people had spoken, and the results were deafening. But then something remarkable happened, a handwritten sign promising salvation: <em>Cl</em><i>osed for renovations.</i></p><p>In an attempt to reverse its slide, the old cafe was giving itself an overhaul, a new fitout, a new menu, and new chairs. According to the unofficial rules of the suburban cafe scene, a shutdown grants clientele permission to look elsewhere without fear of punishment.</p><p>Finally, I was free to enjoy an almond croissant without feeling bad until Kate pointed out that we\\u2019d probably need to visit the old spot after the renovations. \\u201CYou know, just to be supportive?\\u201D</p><p><em><b><strong>Find more of the author\\u2019s work <x-placeholder id=\\\"cdf8b13cf6a55b3da7f21141eb6ab2c49d136b3f\\\"></x-placeholder>. Email him at <x-placeholder id=\\\"475cee47c277b6ea2140e7b6751fbbdd55cef8e2\\\"></x-placeholder> or follow him on </strong></b></em><em><b><strong>Instagram at <x-placeholder id=\\\"4354a6cc9f0bb9acae78b8a4541418d1cfe4a0b9\\\"></x-placeholder> and on Twitter <x-placeholder id=\\\"6219569534883251a6381b312e9aad6f2f0c7e2a\\\"></x-placeholder></strong></b></em></p><p><b><i>Find out the next TV, streaming series and movies to add to your must-sees. </i></b><x-placeholder id=\\\"8ce10a0e03d3f0af50cbf6b62b38b97e4825f0a0\\\"></x-placeholder><b><i>.</i></b></p>\",\"bodyPlaceholders\":{\"4354a6cc9f0bb9acae78b8a4541418d1cfe4a0b9\":{\"data\":{\"newTab\":true,\"noFollow\":false,\"text\":\"@thomasalexandermitchell\",\"url\":\"https://www.instagram.com/thomasalexandermitchell\"},\"type\":\"linkExternal\"},\"4751f3ca35b3545b8582b64b3abd3d79528eafc4\":{\"data\":{\"altText\":\"\",\"aspect\":1.5,\"autoCrop\":false,\"caption\":\"This charming Parisian cafe is not my local, but if it were I\\u2019d probably never abandon it (unless something better came along). \",\"credit\":\"Jan Wlodarczyk / Alamy Stock Photo\",\"cropWidth\":756,\"fileName\":\"7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d\",\"id\":\"7d844f6f6f08269792bb400072f56076ef9a9c0d\",\"offsetX\":0,\"offsetY\":0,\"originalHeight\":null,\"originalWidth\":null,\"source\":\"Not-For-Syndication\",\"zoom\":0.378},\"type\":\"image\"},\"475cee47c277b6ea2140e7b6751fbbdd55cef8e2\":{\"data\":{\"newTab\":false,\"noFollow\":false,\"text\":\"thomas.mitchell@smh.com.au\",\"url\":\"mailto:thomas.mitchell@smh.com.au\"},\"type\":\"linkExternal\"},\"6219569534883251a6381b312e9aad6f2f0c7e2a\":{\"data\":{\"newTab\":true,\"noFollow\":false,\"text\":\"@_thmitchell.\",\"url\":\"https://twitter.com/_thmitchell\"},\"type\":\"linkExternal\"},\"899fbdd360724e76b9cf673dd5a73909a38c3354\":{\"data\":{\"altText\":\"\",\"aspect\":1.776846,\"autoCrop\":false,\"caption\":\"In scenes reminiscent of Edward Hopper\\u2019s Nighthawks, my old cafe is sparsely populated. 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