My Son Left for College, and I'm Trying to Figure Out What to Do Next

<!DOCTYPE html> <html lang="en-US"> <head> <title>My Son Left for College, and I'm Trying to Figure Out What to Do Next - Business Insider</title> <meta charset="UTF-8"> <meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1" > <meta name="title" content="I was 17 when I gave birth to my son. Now that he's off to college, I'm trying to figure out who I am." > <meta name="datePublished" content="2024-11-15T20:21:01Z" > <meta name="dateModified" content="2024-11-15T20:21:01Z" > <meta name="news_keywords" content="Parenting, as told to, Parenting, College" > <meta name="description" content="Winnie Thompson had her son when she was 17. They grew up together and now he's off to college. She's trying to figure out her new life. " > <meta property="author" content="Kimanzi Constable" > <meta property="article:publisher" content="businessinsider" > <meta name="tbi-vertical" content="Parenting" > <meta property="og:title" content="I was 17 when I gave birth to my son. 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Now that he's off to college, I'm trying to figure out who I am.","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://i.insider.com/6734efb4fa0140cdd5632497?width=1200&format=jpeg","width":1200,"height":900,"caption":"Winnie Thompson dropped of her son in college in 2024 and is figuring life without him at home."},"name":"I was 17 when I gave birth to my son. Now that he's off to college, I'm trying to figure out who I am.","datePublished":"2024-11-15T20:21:01Z","dateModified":"2024-11-15T20:21:01Z","description":"Winnie Thompson had her son when she was 17. They grew up together and now he's off to college. She's trying to figure out her new life. ","keywords":"as told to, Parenting, College","articleBody":"This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Winnie Thompson, a 35-year-old business owner in Atlanta. The following has been edited for length and clarity.A single mother raised me, and I am the youngest of three.I got pregnant when I was 16 and gave birth to my son two weeks after I turned 17 years old. Getting pregnant as a teenager wasn't what I planned or expected, but it happened, and I became a single mom myself.Now he's off to college, and I'm trying to figure out what to do next with my life. I get to explore the things I was into as a teen because I had to put my life on hold to be a responsible mom for my son.When I told my mom I was pregnant, she first said, \"Come here, hug me. I will never leave you — we will make it through this together.\" I'll never forget that moment because I was terrified.It was an interesting dynamic in our household because my mom was one of the thousands of people who experienced layoffs during the 2008 recession.We were homeless for a while, so I had to live with a family friend while with a newborn baby, and sometimes we were in extended-stay hotels.While in school, I worked a retail job and at a call center, making minimum wage, but I was able to help my mom with billsI eventually moved out at 20 with my son to get to a one-bedroom apartment in St. Louis. I had a pull-out sofa that doubled as a bed, so sometimes, we would share a bed in the bedroom, or sometimes, he would sleep in the bed, and I would sleep on the sofa.This apartment felt like a \"home\" for us. We painted the apartment together and had a great community around us that helped us out. We grew up together in our place until a massive tornado came through and condemned our entire apartment complex.We found an apartment two miles away from the one destroyed by the tornado. This became our home, and it was here that we started a business together. We called it Books and Bros, a book club for boys that amplifies African American literature through a subscription box service.When I met my now-husband, I made it clear to him that while he pursued a relationship with me, he had to earn the trust of my son, who was 14 at the time. Marwin jumped right in and fully supported me and my son.By the time my son was in high school, I had become an entrepreneur. We moved to Atlanta, and my son started applying for colleges. This was the first time we were craving out paths of our individuality.For him, that meant applying to the colleges he wanted to get into and exploring different majors. For me, it meant exploring what I couldn't do as a young woman because I became a mom.My husband Marwin stepped up at this time and helped my son with the business. He also took him to his football games and helped me emotionally prepare for the reality of having another child 15 years later. We welcomed a little girl together. When it was time for my son to graduate, my friends teased me and thought I would cry at his High School graduation because we had grown up and had so many experiences together, but I didn't — I was just in the moment and very proud of him.His acceptance into American University in Washington, DC, was exciting and proud. It hit me that he was not only going to college but would also live in a new city by himself. It would be our first time without each other. Everything I've done, from where I lived to the jobs I decided to work, is tied to him.I'm finding myself in a space of discovering what I dreamt about when I was 15. 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Now that he's off to college, I'm trying to figure out who I am.</h1> </section> <section class="byline-wrapper " data-interaction-trigger="legacy-share,save-article,read-in-app-button" > <div class="byline " data-e2e-name="byline" > <div class="byline-content" data-e2e-name="byline-content" > <div class="byline-row"> <div class="byline-author-container"> <div class="byline-author headline-regular"> <span class="" data-e2e-name="Kimanzi Constable" > <span class="headline-regular">As told to </span><a class="byline-link byline-author-name" data-e2e-name="byline-author-name" href="https://www.businessinsider.com/author/kimanzi-constable" >Kimanzi Constable</a></span> </div> <time class="byline-timestamp headline-regular js-date-format" data-timestamp="2024-11-15T20:21:01Z" data-e2e-name="byline-timestamp" data-disable-relative-formatting > 2024-11-15T20:21:01Z </time> </div> </div> </div> </div> <section class="sharebar " data-component-type="legacy-share" data-load-strategy="interaction" data-location="" > <div class="share-button-dropdown-wrapper"> <button class="share-button sharebar-link headline-regular"><svg class="svg-icon share-icon " role="img" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="1em" height="1em" fill="none" viewBox="0 0 12 12"> <defs/> <title>Share icon</title> <desc>An curved arrow pointing right.</desc> <path fill-rule="evenodd" d="M7.336 8.014l4.2-3.5-4.2-3.5v2.8h-2.54c-1.948 0-3.526 1.567-3.526 3.5v3.16h1.469v-3.16a2.05 2.05 0 012.056-2.042h2.54v2.742z" clip-rule="evenodd"/> </svg> <span class="button-text">Share</span> </button> <div class="share-dropdown-menu dropdown-menu"> <span class="dropdown-menu-item"> <span class="share-link facebook " data-facebook data-href="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.businessinsider.com%2Fson-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11&utmSource=facebook&utmContent=referral&utmTerm=topbar&referrer=facebook" label="facebook" title="Share on Facebook" aria-label="Click to share on Facebook" data-share-link data-flip-widget="" data-track-element="story" data-track-event-label="facebook" data-href-share="https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.businessinsider.com%2Fson-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11&utmSource=facebook&utmContent=referral&utmTerm=topbar&referrer=facebook" data-e2e-name="share-link-facebook" data-utm-term="" target="_blank" > <span class="dropdown-icon"><svg class="svg-icon social-facebook-icon " role="img" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="1em" height="1em" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-labelledby="Facebook" > <path fill="currentColor" d="M22 12.037C22 6.494 17.523 2 12 2S2 6.494 2 12.037c0 4.707 3.229 8.656 7.584 9.741v-6.674H7.522v-3.067h2.062v-1.322c0-3.416 1.54-5 4.882-5 .634 0 1.727.125 2.174.25v2.78a12.807 12.807 0 0 0-1.155-.037c-1.64 0-2.273.623-2.273 2.244v1.085h3.266l-.561 3.067h-2.705V22C18.163 21.4 22 17.168 22 12.037Z"/> </svg></span> <span class="dropdown-text headline-regular">Facebook</span> </span> </span> <span class="dropdown-menu-item"> <a class="share-link email " data-email data-share-link href="mailto:?subject=I was 17 when I gave birth to my son. 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data-e2e-name="image-figure-image" data-media-container="image" itemscope itemtype="https://schema.org/ImageObject" > <div class="aspect-ratio" style="padding-top: calc(100% / (1656 / 1536))" > <meta itemprop="contentUrl" content="https://i.insider.com/6724fb0501ea6d83dee5a5dd?width=700"/> <img src="https://i.insider.com/6724fb0501ea6d83dee5a5dd?width=700" srcset="https://i.insider.com/6724fb0501ea6d83dee5a5dd?width=400&format=jpeg&auto=webp 400w, https://i.insider.com/6724fb0501ea6d83dee5a5dd?width=500&format=jpeg&auto=webp 500w, https://i.insider.com/6724fb0501ea6d83dee5a5dd?width=700&format=jpeg&auto=webp 700w, https://i.insider.com/6724fb0501ea6d83dee5a5dd?width=1000&format=jpeg&auto=webp 1000w, https://i.insider.com/6724fb0501ea6d83dee5a5dd?width=1300&format=jpeg&auto=webp 1300w" sizes="(min-width: 1280px) 900px" alt="Winnie Thompson holds her daughter next to her son and husband in front of American University." decoding="sync" /> </div> <span class="image-source-caption with-caption-drawer"> <input class="caption-drawer-input" type="checkbox" id="caption-drawer-checkbox"> <label class="caption-drawer-label" for="caption-drawer-btn"> <svg class="svg-icon chevron-down-icon caption-drawer-icon" role="img" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="1em" height="1em" viewBox="0 0 24 24" > <path fill="currentColor" fill-rule="evenodd" d="m19.44 5.5-7.486 7.72L4.56 5.594 2 8.234 11.954 18.5 22 8.14 19.44 5.5Z"/> </svg> </label> <figcaption class="image-caption headline-semibold" data-e2e-name="image-caption" > <span class="image-caption-text">Winnie Thompson dropped of her son in college in 2024 and is figuring life without him at home.</span> <span class="image-source-text"> <span class="image-source headline-regular" data-e2e-name="image-source" itemprop="creditText" > Courtesy of Winnie Thompson </span> </span> </figcaption> </span> </figure> <div class="inline-backup-paywall desktop" data-component-type="inline-backup-paywall" style="display:none"> <span class="headline-semibold subscription-msg">This story is available exclusively to Business Insider subscribers. <a href="/subscription" class="subscription-link">Become an Insider</a> and start reading now.</span> <span class="headline-regular login-prompt">Have an account? <button class="login-prompt-btn">Log in</button>.</span> </div> <div> <section class="post-content typography " data-track-content="" data-post-type="post" > <div id="piano-inline-content-wrapper" data-piano-inline-content-wrapper data-user-status="anonymous" > <div data-component-type="content-lock" data-load-strategy="exclude"> <div class="content-lock-content"> <ul class="summary-list"><li>Winnie Thompson got pregnant at 16 and gave birth to her son at 17.</li><li>She grew up with and did everything with her son — even being in business together.</li><li>Her son left for college in a different state, and she finds herself in a unique life transition.</li></ul><p><em><span>This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Winnie Thompson, a 35-year-old business owner in Atlanta. The following has been edited for length and clarity.</span></em></p><div class="in-post-sticky only-desktop"><div class="ad-callout-wrapper ad-label headline-medium only-desktop"> <div data-bi-ad="" id="gpt-post-parenting-desktop_in_post_ad-desktop-fluid-1" class="ad ad-wrapper fluid in-post only-desktop" data-force="" data-type="ad" data-adunit="businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-1/parenting" data-secvert="" data-tag="as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college" data-authors="kimanzi-constable" data-region="Desktop In Post Ad" data-responsive="[{"browserLimit":[728,0],"slotSize":[[300,250],"fluid"]},{"browserLimit":[1260,0],"slotSize":[[728,90],[300,250],[800,480],[600,480],"fluid"]}]" data-tile-order="tile-1" data-url="/son-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11" data-template="default" data-targeting="{"adunit":"businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-1/parenting","region":"Desktop In Post Ad","tag":"as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college","template":"default","dvp_spos":"in-content-1","rawvert":""}" data-amazontamsizes="[[728,90],[300,250]]" data-not-lazy="" data-enable-ad-refresher="true" data-refresh-count="0"></div> </div></div><p><span>A </span><a target="_blank" class="" href="https://www.businessinsider.com/my-single-mom-did-her-best-raising-me-im-grateful-2023-9" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=""><span>single mother raised me</span></a><span>, and I am the youngest of three.</span></p><p><span>I got pregnant when I was 16 and gave birth to my son two weeks after I turned 17 years old. </span><a target="_blank" class="" href="https://www.businessinsider.com/undercover-high-teen-pregnancy-2018-2" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=""><span>Getting pregnant as a teenager</span></a><span> wasn't what I planned or expected, but it happened, and I became a single mom myself.</span></p><div class="in-post-sticky only-desktop"><div class="ad-callout-wrapper ad-label headline-medium only-desktop"> <div data-bi-ad="" id="gpt-post-parenting-desktop_in_post_ad-desktop-fluid-2" class="ad ad-wrapper fluid in-post only-desktop" data-force="" data-type="ad" data-adunit="businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-2/parenting" data-secvert="" data-tag="as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college" data-authors="kimanzi-constable" data-region="Desktop In Post Ad" data-responsive="[{"browserLimit":[728,0],"slotSize":[[300,250],"fluid"]},{"browserLimit":[1260,0],"slotSize":[[728,90],[300,250],[800,480],[600,480],"fluid"]}]" data-tile-order="tile-2" data-url="/son-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11" data-template="default" data-targeting="{"adunit":"businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-2/parenting","region":"Desktop In Post Ad","tag":"as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college","template":"default","dvp_spos":"in-content-2","rawvert":""}" data-amazontamsizes="[[728,90],[300,250]]" data-enable-ad-refresher="true" data-refresh-count="0"></div> </div></div><p><span>Now he's </span><a target="_blank" class="" href="https://www.businessinsider.com/lonely-empty-nester-sons-went-to-college-2023-8" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=""><span>off to college</span></a><span>, and I'm trying to figure out what to do next with my life. I get to explore the things I was into as a teen because I had to put my life on hold to be a responsible mom for my son.</span></p><h2 id="3b33892f-c406-48cf-b1fa-734f82bd8379" data-toc-id="3b33892f-c406-48cf-b1fa-734f82bd8379"><strong><span>My mom supported me during my pregnancy</span></strong></h2><p><span>When I told my mom I was pregnant, she first said, "Come here, hug me. I will never leave you — we will make it through this together." I'll never forget that moment because I was terrified.</span></p><p><span>It was an interesting dynamic in our household because my mom was one of the thousands of people who </span><a target="_blank" class="" href="https://www.businessinsider.com/jobs-that-have-disappeared-since-the-great-recession" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=""><span>experienced layoffs during the 2008 recession</span></a><span>.</span></p><div class="in-post-sticky only-desktop"><div class="ad-callout-wrapper ad-label headline-medium only-desktop"> <div data-bi-ad="" id="gpt-post-parenting-desktop_in_post_ad-desktop-fluid-3" class="ad ad-wrapper fluid in-post only-desktop" data-force="" data-type="ad" data-adunit="businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-3/parenting" data-secvert="" data-tag="as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college" data-authors="kimanzi-constable" data-region="Desktop In Post Ad" data-responsive="[{"browserLimit":[728,0],"slotSize":[[300,250],"fluid"]},{"browserLimit":[1260,0],"slotSize":[[728,90],[300,250],[800,480],[600,480],"fluid"]}]" data-tile-order="tile-3" data-url="/son-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11" data-template="default" data-targeting="{"adunit":"businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-3/parenting","region":"Desktop In Post Ad","tag":"as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college","template":"default","dvp_spos":"in-content-3","rawvert":""}" data-amazontamsizes="[[728,90],[300,250]]" data-enable-ad-refresher="true" data-refresh-count="0"></div> </div></div><p><span>We were homeless for a while, so I had to live with a family friend while with a newborn baby, and sometimes we </span><a target="_blank" class="" href="https://www.businessinsider.com/what-its-like-living-in-airbnbs-full-time-for-year-2023-5" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=""><span>were in extended-stay hotels</span></a><span>.</span></p><p><span>While in school, I worked a retail job and at a call center, </span><a target="_blank" class="" href="https://www.businessinsider.com/red-states-voted-higher-minimum-wage-paid-leave-abortion-harris-2024-11" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=""><span>making minimum wage</span></a><span>, but I was able to help my mom with bills</span></p> <section class="dad-related-posts-component at-inline related-posts" data-component-type="dad-related-posts" data-delay-third-party-scripts="true" data-size="2" data-container-index="in_content_recirc_1" data-included-verticals="parenting" data-placement="inline" data-excluded-verticals="bi-video" data-root-margin="250px 0px" data-track-view="{"event":"module_in_view","element_name":"in_content_recirc","subscription_experience":"bi_value_unassigned","product_field":"in_content_recirc_1"}"> <div class="content-recommendations-title-container"> <h2 class="content-recommendations-title display-xs ignore-typography"> Related stories </h2> </div> <div class="dad-related-posts-container"></div> </section> <h2 id="8fae0319-6dfd-4c98-aaef-4faec21d9354" data-toc-id="8fae0319-6dfd-4c98-aaef-4faec21d9354"><strong><span>My son and I experienced everything together — high times and low times</span></strong></h2><p><span>I eventually moved out at 20 with my son to get to a </span><a target="_blank" class="" href="https://www.businessinsider.com/real-estate-rent-growth-best-cities-for-renters-apartments-report-2024-1" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=""><span>one-bedroom apartment in St. Louis</span></a><span>. I had a pull-out sofa that doubled as a bed, so sometimes, we would share a bed in the bedroom, or sometimes, he would sleep in the bed, and I would sleep on the sofa.</span></p><div class="in-post-sticky only-desktop"><div class="ad-callout-wrapper ad-label headline-medium only-desktop"> <div data-bi-ad="" id="gpt-post-parenting-desktop_in_post_ad-desktop-fluid-4" class="ad ad-wrapper fluid in-post only-desktop" data-force="" data-type="ad" data-adunit="businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-4-plus/parenting" data-secvert="" data-tag="as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college" data-authors="kimanzi-constable" data-region="Desktop In Post Ad" data-responsive="[{"browserLimit":[728,0],"slotSize":[[300,250],"fluid"]},{"browserLimit":[1260,0],"slotSize":[[728,90],[300,250],[800,480],[600,480],"fluid"]}]" data-tile-order="tile-4" data-url="/son-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11" data-template="default" data-targeting="{"adunit":"businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-4-plus/parenting","region":"Desktop In Post Ad","tag":"as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college","template":"default","dvp_spos":"in-content-4-plus","rawvert":""}" data-amazontamsizes="[[728,90],[300,250]]" data-enable-ad-refresher="true" data-refresh-count="0"></div> </div></div><p><span>This apartment felt like a "home" for us. We painted the apartment together and had a great community around us that helped us out. We grew up together in our place until a massive tornado came through and condemned our entire apartment complex.</span></p><p><span>We found an apartment two miles away from the one destroyed by the tornado. This became our home, and it was here that we started a business together. We called it</span><a target="_blank" href="https://www.booksnbros.com/" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=" nofollow"><span> Books and Bros</span></a><span>, a book club for boys that amplifies African American literature through a subscription box service.</span></p><h2 id="ce33b852-6094-42d4-bf81-ddc9827b78b2" data-toc-id="ce33b852-6094-42d4-bf81-ddc9827b78b2"><span>In 2018, I met the man who would become my husband</span></h2><p><span>When I met my now-husband, I made it clear to him that while he pursued a relationship with me, he had to earn the trust of my son, who was 14 at the time. Marwin jumped right in and fully supported me and my son.</span></p><div class="in-post-sticky only-desktop"><div class="ad-callout-wrapper ad-label headline-medium only-desktop"> <div data-bi-ad="" id="gpt-post-parenting-desktop_in_post_ad-desktop-fluid-5" class="ad ad-wrapper fluid in-post only-desktop" data-force="" data-type="ad" data-adunit="businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-4-plus/parenting" data-secvert="" data-tag="as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college" data-authors="kimanzi-constable" data-region="Desktop In Post Ad" data-responsive="[{"browserLimit":[728,0],"slotSize":[[300,250],"fluid"]},{"browserLimit":[1260,0],"slotSize":[[728,90],[300,250],[800,480],[600,480],"fluid"]}]" data-tile-order="tile-5" data-url="/son-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11" data-template="default" data-targeting="{"adunit":"businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-4-plus/parenting","region":"Desktop In Post Ad","tag":"as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college","template":"default","dvp_spos":"in-content-4-plus","rawvert":""}" data-amazontamsizes="[[728,90],[300,250]]" data-enable-ad-refresher="true" data-refresh-count="0"></div> </div></div><p><span>By the time my son was in high school, I</span><a target="_blank" href="https://bookedenterprise.com/" data-analytics-product-module="body_link" rel=" nofollow"><span> had become an entrepreneur.</span></a><span> We moved to Atlanta, and my son started applying for colleges. This was the first time we were craving out paths of our individuality.</span></p><p><span>For him, that meant applying to the colleges he wanted to get into and exploring different majors. For me, it meant exploring what I couldn't do as a young woman because I became a mom.</span></p><h2 id="c099565b-b96a-4ab5-9693-5473b2100133" data-toc-id="c099565b-b96a-4ab5-9693-5473b2100133"><strong><span>It's the first time we are apart</span></strong></h2><p><span>My husband Marwin stepped up at this time and helped my son with the business. He also took him to his football games and helped me emotionally prepare for the reality of having another child 15 years later. We welcomed a little girl together. </span></p><div class="in-post-sticky only-desktop"><div class="ad-callout-wrapper ad-label headline-medium only-desktop"> <div data-bi-ad="" id="gpt-post-parenting-desktop_in_post_ad-desktop-fluid-6" class="ad ad-wrapper fluid in-post only-desktop" data-force="" data-type="ad" data-adunit="businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-4-plus/parenting" data-secvert="" data-tag="as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college" data-authors="kimanzi-constable" data-region="Desktop In Post Ad" data-responsive="[{"browserLimit":[728,0],"slotSize":[[300,250],"fluid"]},{"browserLimit":[1260,0],"slotSize":[[728,90],[300,250],[800,480],[600,480],"fluid"]}]" data-tile-order="tile-6" data-url="/son-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11" data-template="default" data-targeting="{"adunit":"businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-4-plus/parenting","region":"Desktop In Post Ad","tag":"as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college","template":"default","dvp_spos":"in-content-4-plus","rawvert":""}" data-amazontamsizes="[[728,90],[300,250]]" data-enable-ad-refresher="true" data-refresh-count="0"></div> </div></div><p><span>When it was time for my son to graduate, my friends teased me and thought I would cry at his High School graduation because we had grown up and had so many experiences together, but I didn't — I was just in the moment and very proud of him.</span></p><p><span>His acceptance into American University in Washington, DC, was exciting and proud. It hit me that he was not only going to college but would also live in a new city by himself. It would be our first time without each other. Everything I've done, from where I lived to the jobs I decided to work, is tied to him.</span></p><h2 id="171322ee-eb18-4867-b216-9d02ecf738d7" data-toc-id="171322ee-eb18-4867-b216-9d02ecf738d7"><strong><span>I'm now 35 years old, have a son in college out of state</span></strong></h2><p><span>I'm finding myself in a space of discovering what I dreamt about when I was 15. Because that's how far back I have to go to remember my dreams.</span></p><div class="in-post-sticky only-desktop"><div class="ad-callout-wrapper ad-label headline-medium only-desktop"> <div data-bi-ad="" id="gpt-post-parenting-desktop_in_post_ad-desktop-fluid-7" class="ad ad-wrapper fluid in-post only-desktop" data-force="" data-type="ad" data-adunit="businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-4-plus/parenting" data-secvert="" data-tag="as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college" data-authors="kimanzi-constable" data-region="Desktop In Post Ad" data-responsive="[{"browserLimit":[728,0],"slotSize":[[300,250],"fluid"]},{"browserLimit":[1260,0],"slotSize":[[728,90],[300,250],[800,480],[600,480],"fluid"]}]" data-tile-order="tile-7" data-url="/son-left-for-college-mom-figuring-life-2024-11" data-template="default" data-targeting="{"adunit":"businessinsider.desktop/post/in-content-4-plus/parenting","region":"Desktop In Post Ad","tag":"as-told-to,parenting,parenting-freelancer,college","template":"default","dvp_spos":"in-content-4-plus","rawvert":""}" data-amazontamsizes="[[728,90],[300,250]]" data-enable-ad-refresher="true" data-refresh-count="0"></div> </div></div><p><span>I don't know what it's like to explore messing up as an adult and not being responsible for anyone. I love dance, so I signed up for tap dancing classes.</span></p><p><span>I was so used to being in the background; now I'm growing a business, telling my story more publicly, and honoring the woman who I never got a chance to embody before becoming a mom.</span></p><p><span>It's hard emotionally to be away from my son. I can't walk past his room without my stomach turning into a knot. It's all good feelings; it's just an adjustment.</span></p> </div> </div> </div> </section> </div> <section class="post-content-more"> <section class="dad-related-posts-component at-post-bottom related-posts standard" data-component-type="dad-related-posts" data-delay-third-party-scripts="true" data-size="4" data-container-index="" data-included-verticals="parenting" data-placement="post-bottom" data-excluded-verticals="bi-video" data-root-margin="250px 0px" data-track-view="{"element_name":"end_of_article_recirc","product_field":"bi_value_unassigned","subscription_experience":"bi_value_unassigned"}" > <div class="content-recommendations-title-container"> <h2 class="content-recommendations-title display-xs ignore-typography"> Read next </h2> </div> <div class="dad-related-posts-container"></div> </section> </section> <div class="post-category-tags" data-component-type="post-category-tags" data-load-strategy="lazy"> <ul class="post-category-tags-list headline-semibold" 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