Communication Tips | How to Talk to Your Kids

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class="row"> <section> <div class="region region-content"> <section id="block-system-main" class="block block-system clearfix"><img style="display:none;" src="https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1thumbnail-P-CT.png"> <div class="main-container issues-template"> <div class="container text-center mbottom60 mtop60"> <div class="main-title"> <h1 class="font--dark_blue text-center fittext" data-max-fontsize="56">Communication tips</h1> </div> <div class="main-subtitle mtop30 col-xs-12 col-md-8 col-md-offset-2"> <p class="font--24 line-height--30">Young people often tell Kids Helpline they find it difficult to communicate with their parents. Here are some tips around helping you and your child communicate well together.</p> </div> </div> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full"> <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full"> <div class="bdl-image"> <div class="mtop20"> <img class="img-responsive" src="https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/bdl_image/1header_NEW.png" alt="Mother and daughter talking together" title="Mother and daughter talking together"> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full"> <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--pink font--28 mtop30"> <div class="body"> <h3>What is great communication?</h3> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--24 line-height--30 mtop30 font--dark_blue"> <div class="body"> <h3>Conveying our message is only one part of communication. Great communication goes further and allows us to build trust, self-esteem and strong healthy relationships.</h3> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="mtop20"> <div class="body"> <ul> <li>Great communication is a two-way process. Listening is as important as talking</li> <li>Your child’s brain is still developing including learning to handle their emotions and communicate well</li> <li>Successful communication with your child depends on what, how, when, where and why you say things. What you don’t say is also important!</li> </ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full"> <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--pink font--28 mtop30"> <div class="body"> <h3>Communication styles</h3> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--24 line-height--30 mtop30 font--dark_blue"> <div class="body"> <h3>The way we communicate differs based on gender, cultural background, age and the situation.</h3> <p>It’s likely you and your child have different communication expectations because of the generation gap.</p> <p>However, in general there are three communication styles. The first is more helpful when compared with the other two.</p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> <div class=""> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full"> <div class="bdl bdl-tile"> <div class=" "> <div class="tile col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-4 "> <div class="tile-img" style="background-image:url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1A-P-CT.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <div class="tile-tag"> Assertive communication – not blaming others and taking turns to listen </div> </div> <div class="buttons"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix">  </div> </div> </div> <div class="tile col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-4 "> <div class="tile-img" style="background-image:url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1B-P-CT.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <div class="tile-tag"> Passive communication – giving the silent treatment and avoiding conflict </div> </div> <div class="buttons"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix">  </div> </div> </div> <div class="tile col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-4 "> <div class="tile-img" style="background-image:url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1C-P-CT.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <div class="tile-tag"> Aggressive communication – being forceful, not listening, harsh and blaming </div> </div> <div class="buttons"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix">  </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container pbottom60" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full"> <div class="bdl bdl-callout" style="background-color: #b3d235"> <div class=""> <p>“Kids learn to communicate through watching those around them. They need us to show them how”<strong> – John, parent of a 17 year old</strong></p> </div> <div class="arrow" style="background-color: #b3d235"></div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl bdl-bullet-items" style="background-color: #b3d235"> <div class="mtop60 container"> <div class="titles text-center"> <h2 class="title">How can you support great communication with your child?</h2> <div class="subtitle"> <p>It’s easy to expect more of your child than they can give. They are on an emotional (and hormonal) rollercoaster during certain stages of growing up.</p> <p>Here are some ideas to help you be a great communication role model:</p> </div> </div> <div class="items col-xs-12 col-md-8 col-md-offset-2 mtop40"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"><label for="item"> </label> <p>Notice your own communication style and make changes if aggressive or passive</p> </div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"><label for="item"> </label> <p>Encourage face-to-face instead of electronic or online communication</p> </div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"><label for="item"> </label> <p>Teach your child about the three communication styles</p> </div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"><label for="item"> </label> <p>Hit pause – take time to calm down, think and then talk further</p> </div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"><label for="item"> </label> <p>Plan how, where and when to talk – also know what not to say</p> </div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"><label for="item"> </label> <p>Summarise to your child what you heard them say</p> </div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"><label for="item"> </label> <p>Ask questions and share concerns, rather than assume and criticise</p> </div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"><label for="item"> </label> <p>Don’t avoid conflict – calmly take the lead in facing it</p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full"> <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--pink font--28 mtop30"> <div class="body"> <h3>What if communication has broken down?</h3> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--24 line-height--30 mtop30 font--dark_blue"> <div class="body"> <h3>You might feel powerless when you and your child can’t talk effectively about difficult matters.</h3> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="mtop20"> <div class="body"> <ul> <li><p>You could try sticking to safe topics, while you work out what to do</p></li> <li><p>Tell them you care and will do all you can to work this out</p></li> <li><p>Sometimes it can help to have a calm third person involved to support communication between you</p></li> <li><p>If you have concerns about your child’s development of communication skills for their age, check in with your doctor</p></li> <li><p>Remember, you and your child are not alone - they can talk to <a href="https://translate.google.com/website?sl=en&tl=vi&hl=en-GB&u=https://www.kidshelpline.com.au">Kids Helpline</a> and you can talk to a <a href="https://translate.google.com/website?sl=en&tl=vi&hl=en-GB&u=https://www.parentline.com.au/">Parentline</a> counsellor in your State or Territory</p></li> </ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl bdl-review-date"> <div class="ptop40"> <div class="body"> <em>This content was last reviewed <span class="date-display-single">14/02/2018</span></em> </div> </div> </div> <div class="bdl bdl-recommendation container mbottom40"> <h3 class="mainTitle text-center">Check these out too:</h3> <div class="mainContainer"><a href="https://kidshelpline-com-au.translate.goog/parents/issues/building-respectful-relationships?_x_tr_sl=en&_x_tr_tl=vi&_x_tr_hl=en-GB"> <div class="view_item col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-3"> <div class="internalContainer col-xs-12" style="background-color:"> <div class="squareImage" style="background-image: url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1-P-BRR-THUMBNAIL.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <p class="title">Building respectful relationships</p> <p class="subtitle">As a parent, you play an important role in helping your kids ...</p><span class="link">READ ME</span> </div> </div> </div></a> <a href="https://kidshelpline-com-au.translate.goog/parents/issues/building-healthy-family-relationships?_x_tr_sl=en&_x_tr_tl=vi&_x_tr_hl=en-GB"> <div class="view_item col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-3"> <div class="internalContainer col-xs-12" style="background-color:"> <div class="squareImage" style="background-image: url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1thumbnail-P-BHFR.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <p class="title">Building healthy family relationships</p> <p class="subtitle">Healthy family relationships are important for your child’s wellbeing and development. ...</p><span class="link">READ ME</span> </div> </div> </div></a> <a href="https://kidshelpline-com-au.translate.goog/parents/issues/cultural-differences-and-conflict?_x_tr_sl=en&_x_tr_tl=vi&_x_tr_hl=en-GB"> <div class="view_item col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-3"> <div class="internalContainer col-xs-12" style="background-color:"> <div class="squareImage" style="background-image: url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/THUMBNAIL-P-CDAC-.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <p class="title">Cultural differences and conflict</p> <p class="subtitle">Our kids’ wellbeing is impacted by cross cultural issues, often through discrimination ...</p><span class="link">READ ME</span> </div> </div> </div></a> <a href="https://kidshelpline-com-au.translate.goog/parents/issues/how-parentline-can-help-you?_x_tr_sl=en&_x_tr_tl=vi&_x_tr_hl=en-GB"> <div class="view_item col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-3"> <div class="internalContainer col-xs-12" style="background-color:"> <div class="squareImage" style="background-image: url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/thumbnail-P-HPCHY.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <p class="title">How Parentline can help you</p> <p class="subtitle">Parenting can be a tough job but also really rewarding. 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