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src="/extensions/wikihow/socialstamp/images/icon-pdf.svg" alt="PDF download" width="150" height="150"> <span class="pdfText">Download Article</span> </a> <div class="subtitle">Understand his mixed signals—and whether you should keep pursuing him or move on</div> <div id="coauthor_byline" class="article_byline "> <div id="byline_info"> <span class=""> <b>Written by</b> <a href="/Author/Kate-Dreyfus" class="coauthor_link coauthor_checkstar">Kate Dreyfus</a> </span> <span class="coauthor_pipe">|</span> <b>Edited by</b> <a href="/Author/Dev-Murphy-MA" class="coauthor_link">Dev Murphy, MA</a> <p id="coauthor_byline_p"> <a href="#" class="byline_info_link hover_pop"> <span class="last_updated_highlighted">Last Updated: November 11, 2024</span> </a> <a href="#" class="eat_tag">Fact Checked</a> </p> </div> </div> <a class="small_pdf_link pdf_link disabled " href="#"> <img class="pdf_link-img" loading="lazy" src="/extensions/wikihow/socialstamp/images/icon-pdf.svg" alt="PDF download" width="150" height="150"> <span class="pdfText">Download Article</span> </a><div id="inline_toc"> <div class="truncate_toc"> <div class="truncate_toc_inner"> <ul class="toc_ul"> <li class="toc_li method_toc_item"><a class="toc_li_a" href="#Possible-Reasons-Why">Possible Reasons Why</a></li> <span class="toc_li_span separator">|</span><li class="toc_li method_toc_item"><a class="toc_li_a" href="#Signs-He.E2.80.99s-Lost-Interest">Signs He’s Lost Interest</a></li> <span class="toc_li_span separator">|</span><li class="toc_li method_toc_item"><a class="toc_li_a" href="#What-You-Can-Do">What You Can Do</a></li> <span class="toc_li_span separator">|</span><li class="toc_li method_toc_item"><a class="toc_li_a" href="#Video">Video</a></li> </ul> <button id="inline_toc_showmore" class="inline_toc_button initial"><span class="inline_toc_button_span">|</span><span class="showmore toc_toggle_text">Show more</span></button> <button id="inline_toc_showless" class="inline_toc_button initial"><span 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id="mobile_tab_line"></div> </div> <div class="mobile_tab video"> <a href="#Video">VIDEO</a> </div> </div> <div id="byline_hover" hidden> <div id="byline_hover_close">X</div> <div id="byline_hover_body"> <p> This article was written by <a href="/Author/Kate-Dreyfus">Kate Dreyfus</a> and by wikiHow staff writer, <a href="/Author/Dev-Murphy-MA">Dev Murphy, MA</a>. Kate Dreyfus is a dedicated Holistic Love Coach, Holistic Empowerment Coach, Heart-Centered Expert, Intuitive Healer, Workshop Facilitator, and Owner of Evolve & Empower. She has more than ten years of experience supporting her clients successfully entering exclusive, romantic relationships within the USA, the United Kingdom, Canada, and Europe. Kate is devoted to helping others through personal growth and transformation, success in dating and romance, and healing and rebuilding after a breakup. She is also a member of The Biofield Institute, the Healing Touch Professional Association, and the Energy Medicine Professional Association. Kate holds a BA in Psychology from San Francisco State University. <br><br> This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. <br><br> This article has been viewed 279,808 times. </p> </div> </div> <div class="mf-section-0" id="mf-section-0"><p>Few things feel as good as the butterflies you get when you think the guy you’re into might like you back. But what do you do when that very same guy suddenly seems to back off with no explanation? Should you keep pursuing him anyway, or take it as a hint that a relationship with this dude just isn’t written in the stars? There are lots of different reasons a guy might seem interested only to suddenly back off, and while some reasons may indicate it’s not a love match, others don’t necessarily spell doom for the relationship. Keep reading to learn why things might have cooled off between you and your guy—and what to do about it. <br><br>This article is based on an interview with our holistic love coach and intuitive healer, Kate Dreyfus, owner of Evolve & Empower. <span id="wh-dialog-sample_25a27b6c3e3be5097a1fb70373217f4f"><a class="expert_interview_link sd_link" data-sample-title="wikiHow Expert Interview Kate Dreyfus" data-sample-link="/Sample/wikiHow-Expert-Interview-Kate-Dreyfus" href="#wh-dialog-sample_25a27b6c3e3be5097a1fb70373217f4f" rel="nofollow">Check out the full interview here.</a></span> </p></div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="wh_ad_inner w_label al_grey" data-service="adsense" data-instantload="1" data-slot="7672188889" data-width="728" data-height="120" data-smallslot="8943394577" data-smallheight="120" data-innerclass="full-width" data-full-width-intro="true" data-type="intro" data-small="1" data-medium="1" data-large="1" data-channels="9848412230,1179844797" data-largechannels="7020581953,2060152247,5763098696" data-mediumchannels="8142447154,4066873649" data-smallchannels="1761065154,8156154280" data-smallservice_eu="dfp" data-smalladunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_sma_intro" data-smallsize="[[300, 100],[320,100]]" data-smallheight_eu="100" data-mediumservice_eu="dfp" data-mediumadunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_sma_intro" data-mediumsize="[[300, 100],[320,100]]" data-service_eu="dfp" data-size="[[728, 90],[728, 120]]" data-adunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_lgm_intro" data-prebidload="1" data-apsload="1" data-aps-timeout="800" data-aditudetarget="pb-slot-engl-intro" data-pagetype="methods" data-observerloading="1" data-sizes-array="[[728, 90],[728, 120]]" data-gptdisplaylate="1" data-pbadunits='{"appnexus":20261433,"pubmatic":"3224244","ix":"579269","amx":"d2lraWhvdy5jb20","rubicon":"1849302","shemedia":"2952570","openx":"542288967","triplelift":"Wikihow_engl_gam_lgm_intro_728x90_Prebid","yahooAds":"8a9694c7017474db0327dc33df760300","yieldmo":"2581129714336735279","grid":393573,"medianet":"207085545","rise":"engl_gam_lgm_intro","sharethrough":"QziDJYElLkw7LFscfNzZmTfF"}' data-pbadunitssmall='{"appnexus":"30608495","pubmatic":"5347070","ix":"1024075","amx":"d2lraWhvdy5jb20","rubicon":"2995658","shemedia":"2952570","openx":"559676946","triplelift":"WikiHow_en_gam_sma_intro","yieldmo":"3337803366053912987","grid":403845,"medianet":"586446450","rise":"engl_gam_sma_intro","sharethrough":"7dKaGJpJca7Pli6AwNqi6hnz"}' data-pbadunitsmedium='{"appnexus":"30608495","pubmatic":"5347070","ix":"1024075","amx":"d2lraWhvdy5jb20","rubicon":"2995658","shemedia":"2952570","openx":"559676946","triplelift":"WikiHow_en_gam_sma_intro","yieldmo":"3337803366053912987","grid":403845,"medianet":"586446450","rise":"engl_gam_sma_intro","sharethrough":"7dKaGJpJca7Pli6AwNqi6hnz"}'><div id="intro_ad_1" class="full-width"></div></div> <script>WH.ads.addBodyAd('intro_ad_1')</script><script>WH.performance.mark('intro_rendered');</script> </div> <div class="wh_ad_inner" data-service="dfp" data-type="scrollto" data-adunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_all_scrol" data-size="[728, 90]" data-prebidload="1" data-apsload="1" data-aps-timeout="800" data-maxsteps="6" data-maxnonsteps="3" data-width="728" data-height="90" data-large="1" data-medium="1" data-channels="1179844797" data-aditudetarget="pb-slot-engl-scrol" data-largechannels="2060152247,5763098696" data-smallchannels="8156154280" data-mediumchannels="4066873649" data-pagetype="methods" data-observerloading="1" data-sizes-array="[728, 90]" data-gptdisplaylate="1" data-pbadunits='{"appnexus":19512208,"pubmatic":"2946818","ix":"531046","amx":"d2lraWhvdy5jb20","rubicon":"1753134","shemedia":"2952570","openx":"541138162","triplelift":"Wikihow_engl_gam_all_728x90_Prebid","yahooAds":"8a96954f01747430358b365459b80331","yieldmo":"2508866731741487190","grid":168908,"medianet":"464704332","rise":"engl_gam_all_scrol","sharethrough":"YRwAUQ4n3r0xdDMH0TOrPfnH"}'><div id="scrollto_ad_1"></div></div> <script>WH.ads.addBodyAd('scrollto_ad_1')</script><div class="section thingsyoushouldknow before_steps_section sticky tysk"> <div class="headline_container "><div class="headline_info"><h2 class="section-heading" onclick="javascript:mfTempOpenSection(1)"> <div class="mw-ui-icon mw-ui-icon-element indicator"></div> <span class="mw-headline" id="Things-You-Should-Know">Things You Should Know</span> </h2></div></div> <div id="thingsyoushouldknow" class="section_text"> <ul> <li>Look for signs he’s lost interest, such as avoiding you, treating you like a friend, or just seeming less invested in you than he was before.</li> <li>Consider reasons his interest may have waned: maybe he’s shy, maybe he’s playing head games, or maybe he’s just realized you’re not compatible!</li> <li>Decide whether it’s worth it to pursue him anyway. He might just need time—or he might just not be worth the trouble.</li> <li>Ask him directly what’s going on. It may be something you can work through together. If not, at least you know!</li> </ul> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="wh_ad_inner w_label al_grey gam" data-service="dfp" data-instantload="1" data-adunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_all_scrol" data-size="[728, 90]" data-prebidload="1" data-apsload="1" data-aps-timeout="800" data-width="728" data-height="90" data-innerclass="gam" data-type="prestep" data-large="1" data-medium="1" data-channels="1179844797" data-aditudetarget="pb-slot-engl-scrol" data-largechannels="2060152247,5763098696" data-smallchannels="8156154280" data-mediumchannels="4066873649" data-pagetype="methods" data-observerloading="1" data-sizes-array="[728, 90]" data-gptdisplaylate="1" data-pbadunits='{"appnexus":19512208,"pubmatic":"2946818","ix":"531046","amx":"d2lraWhvdy5jb20","rubicon":"1753134","shemedia":"2952570","openx":"541138162","triplelift":"Wikihow_engl_gam_all_728x90_Prebid","yahooAds":"8a96954f01747430358b365459b80331","yieldmo":"2508866731741487190","grid":168908,"medianet":"464704332","rise":"engl_gam_all_scrol","sharethrough":"YRwAUQ4n3r0xdDMH0TOrPfnH"}'><div id="prestep_ad_1" class="gam blockthrough"></div></div> <script>WH.ads.addBodyAd('prestep_ad_1')</script> </div> </div> <div class="mf-section-1 collapsible-block" id="mf-section-1"> </div> <h2 class="section-heading hidden" onclick="javascript:mfTempOpenSection(2)"> <div class="mw-ui-icon mw-ui-icon-element indicator"></div> <span class="mw-headline" id="Steps">Steps</span> </h2> <div class="mf-section-2 collapsible-block" id="mf-section-2"> <div class="section steps steps_first sticky"> <div class="headline_container block_header in-block subheadline"> <div class="altblock"></div> <div class="headline_info"> <div class="method_label">Section 1 of 3:</div> <h3><span class="mw-headline" id="Possible-Reasons-Why">Possible Reasons Why</span></h3> </div> <a class="large_pdf_link pdf_link disabled pdf_link_steps " href="#"> <img class="pdf_link-img" loading="lazy" src="/extensions/wikihow/socialstamp/images/icon-pdf.svg" alt="PDF download" width="150" height="150"> <span class="pdfText">Download Article</span> </a> </div> <div id="steps_1" class="section_text"> <ol class="steps_list_2"> <li id="step-id-00"> <a name="step_1_1" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 1 He’s running from his emotions." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/1/14/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg" data-firstimage="1" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="1a8b8f18f346d9d87361a88f942bfa84" onload="WH.performance.clearMarks('image1_rendered'); WH.performance.mark('image1_rendered');" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/1/14/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('1a8b8f18f346d9d87361a88f942bfa84')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 1 He’s running from his emotions." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/1/14/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/1/14/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg" data-firstimage="1" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="1a8b8f18f346d9d87361a88f942bfa84" onload="WH.performance.clearMarks('image1_rendered'); WH.performance.mark('image1_rendered');"></noscript> <script>WH.performance.clearMarks('image1_rendered'); WH.performance.mark('image1_rendered');</script><div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/1\/14\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/1\/14\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">1</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He’s running from his emotions.</b> Dating can bring up a lot of difficult feelings. He may like you but find it too overwhelming to pursue a relationship—or maybe he’s just emotionally unavailable.<sup id="_ref-1" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 1"><a href="#_note-1">[1]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_1" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> <ul> <li>It’s possible past experiences have colored his current outlook. He may just need time to overcome those experiences—but don’t cross your fingers.</li> <li>He might be afraid to let someone in. Hey, love is a scary, scary thing! The thought of getting close to someone and the relationship falling apart is enough to drive a lot of people away from dating altogether.</li> </ul> <script>WH.performance.mark('step1_rendered');</script> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-01"> <a name="step_1_2" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 2 He’s got a fear of commitment." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/c/c7/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="804db424d4ccefa9181d00754af26da7" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/c/c7/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('804db424d4ccefa9181d00754af26da7')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 2 He’s got a fear of commitment." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/c/c7/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/c/c7/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="804db424d4ccefa9181d00754af26da7"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c7\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c7\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">2</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He’s got a fear of commitment.</b> Sounds like a cliché, but it happens. Some people interpret “relationship” as “ball and chain,” and this guy could be one of those. He might still have some wild oats to sow, or whatever. Trust us, it’s not worth getting involved with someone like this.<sup id="_ref-2" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 2"><a href="#_note-2">[2]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_2" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> <ul><li>It’s possible you’re one of several irons he’s got in the fire. He could be refusing to commit to a single person because he’s interested in seeing multiple people at once, so unless you’re OK with that, it might not work out with this guy.</li></ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="wh_ad_inner w_label al_grey" data-service="adsense" data-slot="4498472735" data-smallheight="250" data-small="1" data-type="step2" data-containerless="1" data-fullwidthadsense="1" data-aditudetarget="pb-slot-engl-meth" data-channels="1179844797" data-largechannels="2060152247,5763098696" data-smallchannels="8156154280" data-mediumchannels="4066873649" data-pagetype="methods" data-observerloading="1" data-sizes-array="0" data-gptdisplaylate="1"><div id="step2_ad_1"></div></div> <div class="al_method">Advertisement</div> <script>WH.ads.addBodyAd('step2_ad_1')</script><div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-02"> <a name="step_1_3" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 3 He’s just had a bad breakup." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/2/22/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="03af317d550645a70a603e6b0d350119" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/22/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('03af317d550645a70a603e6b0d350119')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 3 He’s just had a bad breakup." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/22/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/2/22/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="03af317d550645a70a603e6b0d350119"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/22\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/2\/22\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">3</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He’s just had a bad breakup.</b> He might be backing away because he’s just not ready to dive into something yet. He could be super into you and see you as relationship material, but if he’s not ready to date yet, he might give you a lot of <a href="/What-Are-Examples-of-Mixed-Signals-from-Guys" title="What Are Examples of Mixed Signals from Guys">mixed signals</a> about his interest and availability.<sup id="_ref-3" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 3"><a href="#_note-3">[3]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_3" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> <ul><li>He may just need to move slowly with you, but there’s a difference between recovering from a breakup and not being over his ex, so proceed with caution. If he’s <a href="/Know-if-Your-Partner-Still-Loves-Their-Ex" title="Know if Your Partner Still Loves Their Ex">hung up on his ex</a>, a relationship with this guy is almost certain to be dissatisfying.</li></ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-03"> <a name="step_1_4" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 4 He thinks distancing is a dating technique." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/8/83/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="f2992ceb66cc19fcad9acf0acd084f57" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/8/83/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('f2992ceb66cc19fcad9acf0acd084f57')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 4 He thinks distancing is a dating technique." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/8/83/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/8/83/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="f2992ceb66cc19fcad9acf0acd084f57"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/8\/83\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/8\/83\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">4</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He thinks distancing is a dating technique.</b> Oy vey! There are a lot of “dating experts” out there promulgating the idea that playing hot-and-cold is the way to win someone’s heart. And this form of <a href="/Find-out-if-He%27s-Playing-With-You" title="Find out if He's Playing With You">gameplaying</a> isn’t <i>totally</i> based in myth: studies show we’re pretty much all wired to want what we can’t have. It’s basic reverse psychology. Your guy could be trying to use the “scarcity mindset” to his benefit—but ask yourself, do you want him because you want him, or because you think you can’t have him?<sup id="_ref-4" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 4"><a href="#_note-4">[4]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_4" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> <ul><li>This seduction tactic is often employed by people with low self-esteem (as is its cousin, negging) and is designed to lower <i>your</i> self-esteem enough that you think he’s a catch.<sup id="_ref-5" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 5"><a href="#_note-5">[5]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_5" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> </li></ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-04"> <a name="step_1_5" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 5 He may be dating around." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/f/fd/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="df463790d962a316176a66eeaca4aa04" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/f/fd/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('df463790d962a316176a66eeaca4aa04')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 5 He may be dating around." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/f/fd/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/f/fd/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="df463790d962a316176a66eeaca4aa04"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/f\/fd\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/f\/fd\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">5</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He may be dating around.</b> It’s possible he’s seeing multiple people at once, and even if he really likes you, he might not be ready to stop playing the field. If he doesn’t seem to be invested in you, it could just be that his interest is divided among several different people at once. <ul><li>If his interest has noticeably waned, it could mean he’s met someone else he’s more interested in.</li></ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-05"> <a name="step_1_6" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 6 He has a fear of rejection." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/b/b9/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="8ec7d1ec75991d4cc573104b50c9eab4" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/b9/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('8ec7d1ec75991d4cc573104b50c9eab4')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 6 He has a fear of rejection." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/b9/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/b/b9/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="8ec7d1ec75991d4cc573104b50c9eab4"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b9\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b9\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">6</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He has a fear of rejection.</b> He may be acting like he isn’t into you because he’s afraid <i>you’re</i> not into <i>him</i>. The instinct for self-preservation may lead him to ghost you—or to at least be super wary of showing you too much interest. You hold his heart in the palm of your hand like a fluttering little bird.<sup id="_ref-7" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 7"><a href="#_note-7">[6]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_7" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> <ul> <li>He might think he’s not good enough for you. Humility is a great characteristic in a partner, but insecurity…not so much.</li> <li>It’s possible he’s waiting for you to <a href="/Make-the-First-Move" title="Make the First Move">make more moves</a>! Ask yourself if you’ve made it clear that you like him and want to pursue something with him—or if you’ve been waiting on him to make the moves. </li> </ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-06"> <a name="step_1_7" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 7 Things are moving too fast for him." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/2/2a/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="abeb3c9c35f812627e448a24f1babfb7" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/2a/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('abeb3c9c35f812627e448a24f1babfb7')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 7 Things are moving too fast for him." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/2a/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/2/2a/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="abeb3c9c35f812627e448a24f1babfb7"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/2a\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/2\/2a\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">7</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">Things are moving too fast for him.</b> He may be all in—just <i>slowly</i>. If he feels like there’s any pressure to dive into a committed relationship and pick out wedding rings and baby names and the rocking chairs you’ll be rocking in together when you’re 92, anxiety might lead him to distance himself from you. He may not be sure how he feels about you and just need a little time to figure it out, or he may really like you and have cold feet.<sup id="_ref-9" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 9"><a href="#_note-9">[7]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_9" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> <ul> <li>If you suspect this pertains to your guy, <a href="/Take-a-Relationship-Slow" title="Take a Relationship Slow">take it slow</a>! His cold feet might thaw out in time.</li> <li>You may not be ready for a big commitment either—but make sure <i>he</i> knows that! He’ll take comfort in knowing there’s no pressure.</li> </ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-07"> <a name="step_1_8" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 8 He has other priorities right now." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/d/dd/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="e84052854d123fe176e4a6ea879b7c3d" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/d/dd/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('e84052854d123fe176e4a6ea879b7c3d')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 8 He has other priorities right now." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/d/dd/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/d/dd/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="e84052854d123fe176e4a6ea879b7c3d"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/d\/dd\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/d\/dd\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">8</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He has other priorities right now.</b> He could be busy with work or preparing for a big cross-country move. He could be focusing on his health. He could be a superhero whose only mistress is the city he defends. There could be any number of important things distracting him from dating. He might really like you, but if the timing is wrong, it’s probably not meant to be.<sup id="_ref-10" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 10"><a href="#_note-10">[8]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_10" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> <ul><li>It’s also possible that you’re not what he wants right now. Maybe you’re relationship material, and he’s looking for a <a href="/Whats-the-Difference-Between-a-Fling-and-a-Relationship" title="Whats the Difference Between a Fling and a Relationship">fling</a>, or vice versa. Like ships passing in the night.</li></ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-08"> <a name="step_1_9" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 9 He’s too shy to make a move." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/2/25/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="815e76616a677eaf81db2df69ad7da1e" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/25/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('815e76616a677eaf81db2df69ad7da1e')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 9 He’s too shy to make a move." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/25/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/2/25/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="815e76616a677eaf81db2df69ad7da1e"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/25\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/2\/25\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">9</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He’s too shy to make a move.</b> You might interpret his distance as a lack of interest when in fact, the poor dude is positively squirming inside trying to figure out how to take things to the next level. He may be unsure how to go about sharing his real feelings, or maybe he’s afraid being more direct will come off too forward.<sup id="_ref-11" class="reference" aria-label="Link to Reference 11"><a href="#_note-11">[9]</a><span class="ts_popup " hidden id="ts_popup_11" style="display: none;"> <span class="ts_close">X</span> <span class="ts_name">Research source</span> <span class="ts_description"></span> <a href="#" class="ts_source" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noreferrer noopener"></a> </span> </sup> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-09"> <a name="step_1_10" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 10 He only wants a sexual relationship." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/3/3f/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="7e87a39c412baa86895e4d7b324c43e0" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/3/3f/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('7e87a39c412baa86895e4d7b324c43e0')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 10 He only wants a sexual relationship." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/3/3f/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/3/3f/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="7e87a39c412baa86895e4d7b324c43e0"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/3\/3f\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/3\/3f\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">10</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He only wants a sexual relationship.</b> He may have detected that you’re interested in more than just hooking up, and he’s trying to back away slowly. His sudden lack of interest could signal he wants to end things, or that he wants to keep you at a distance. Either way, if he’s not interested in more than sex, and you are, it’s probably not a good match. </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-010"> <a name="step_1_11" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 11 You’re just not “the one.”" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/a/a3/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="adaa892894c31464ed92e4647b313c6e" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/a/a3/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('adaa892894c31464ed92e4647b313c6e')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 11 You’re just not “the one.”" src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/a/a3/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/a/a3/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="adaa892894c31464ed92e4647b313c6e"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/a\/a3\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/a3\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">11</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">You’re just not “the one.”</b> Ouch. Kudos to him, we suppose, for knowing what he wants early and dipping out, but he could be a little more direct and communicate what he’s thinking. In any case, rejection hurts, but remember that more likely than not, it’s not personal—your “one” (if you believe in that) is someone else. <ul> <li>He may have picked up on a random red flag while getting to know you—something he just doesn’t want in his romantic life.</li> <li>He might have realized you’re not compatible—maybe you don’t have the same goals or interests or values—and it’s likely that if you kept dating, you would realize it too. </li> <li>Maybe he just felt like you didn’t gel! The heart wants what it wants (and it doesn’t want what it doesn’t want).</li> </ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="wh_ad_inner w_label al_grey" data-service="dfp" data-adunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_lgm_early" data-size="[728, 90]" data-prebidload="1" data-apsload="1" data-aps-timeout="2000" data-width="728" data-height="90" data-large="1" data-medium="1" data-channels="1179844797" data-type="method" data-aditudetarget="pb-slot-engl-early" data-largechannels="2060152247,5763098696" data-smallchannels="8156154280" data-mediumchannels="4066873649" data-pagetype="methods" data-observerloading="1" data-sizes-array="[728, 90]" data-gptdisplaylate="1" data-pbadunits='{"appnexus":20261434,"pubmatic":"3224245","ix":"579271","amx":"d2lraWhvdy5jb20","rubicon":"1849304","shemedia":"2952570","openx":"542288968","triplelift":"Wikihow_engl_gam_lgm_early_728x90_Prebid","yahooAds":"8a9690fd017474dafe8adc342f970052","yieldmo":"2581129714420621360","grid":168926,"medianet":"525411714","rise":"engl_gam_lgm_early","sharethrough":"gRRuNlH2aMjBmEgjkjw9vqwh"}'><div id="method_ad_1"></div></div> <script>WH.ads.addBodyAd('method_ad_1')</script> </li> <div class="wh_ad_inner w_label al_grey dfpsmall dfpsmallmethod containerless_ad fluid" data-service="adsense" data-slot="7710650179" data-width="728" data-height="90" data-smallheight="250" data-type="method" data-small="1" data-channels="1179844797" data-smallservice="dfp" data-adunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_sma_meth0" data-size='[[300, 250],"fluid"]' data-apsload="1" data-prebidload="1" data-aps-timeout="800" data-containerless="1" data-fullwidthadsense="1" data-fluidsize="1" data-mediumchannels="3005955957,4066873649" data-smallchannels="2811805837,8156154280" data-aditudetarget="pb-slot-engl-meth" data-largechannels="2060152247,5763098696" data-insertslotvalue="1" data-pagetype="methods" data-observerloading="1" data-sizes-array='[[300, 250],"fluid"]' data-gptdisplaylate="1" data-pbadunits='{"appnexus":29111279,"pubmatic":"4926794","ix":"944751","amx":"d2lraWhvdy5jb20","rubicon":"2756126","shemedia":"2952570","openx":"558892622","triplelift":"Wikihow_engl_gam_sma_meth0_300x250_Prebid","yieldmo":"3204666393567896410","grid":383057,"medianet":"521047606","rise":"engl_gam_sma_meth0","sharethrough":"xZq2HSiUJL1GRBHUi49ybeLd"}'><div id="mobilemethod_ad_1"></div></div> <div class="al_method">Advertisement</div> <script>WH.ads.addBodyAd('mobilemethod_ad_1')</script> </ol> <div class="clearall"></div> </div> </div> <div id="inarticle_quiz" class="section "> <div class="headline_container block_header"> <div class="altblock"><div><span>Quiz</span></div></div> <div class="headline_info"> <h2 class="section-heading"> <span class="mw-headline">wikiHow Quiz: Does He Like Me?</span> </h2> </div> </div> <div class="section_text quiz_slide"> <div class="inarticle_intro"> Some guys can feel like a total mystery. How can you figure out if he likes you as just a friend—or if he wants something more? Take this quiz to find out! </div> <div id="quiz_slide_nav"> <div class="quiz_previous_placeholder"></div> <div id="quiz_progress_bar"> <div id="quiz_progress_bar-div"> <div id="quiz_progress_bar-div-div" style="width:8.333333333333334%"></div> </div> </div> <div id="quiz_progress_number" class="quiz_progress_right"> 1 of 15 </div> </div> <h2>When you two are in a room filled with other people, how often do you catch him staring at you?</h2> <label for="1_1"> <div class="quiz_answer"> <div class="select_circle" hidden></div> <input type="radio" name="slide_1" id="1_1" data-number="1"> <p>Constantly! I swear, he’s always looking right back at me.</p> </div> </label> <label for="1_2"> <div class="quiz_answer"> <div class="select_circle" hidden></div> <input type="radio" name="slide_1" id="1_2" data-number="2"> <p>I’ve noticed him staring a few times, yeah.</p> </div> </label> <label for="1_3"> <div class="quiz_answer"> <div class="select_circle" hidden></div> <input type="radio" name="slide_1" id="1_3" data-number="3"> <p>I think I’ve caught him staring once or twice.</p> </div> </label> <label for="1_4"> <div class="quiz_answer"> <div class="select_circle" hidden></div> <input type="radio" name="slide_1" id="1_4" data-number="4"> <p>Nope, I’ve never noticed that.</p> </div> </label> <div id="quiz_footer"> <div id="quiz_ad_notice"></div> <button class="quiz_button big" data-url="/Relationships/Does-He-Like-Me-Quiz" disabled> Next </button> </div> </div> </div> <div class="section steps sticky"> <div class="headline_container block_header in-block subheadline"> <div class="altblock"></div> <div class="headline_info"> <div class="method_label">Section 2 of 3:</div> <span id="Signs-He’s-Lost-Interest"></span><h3><span class="mw-headline" id="Signs-He.E2.80.99s-Lost-Interest">Signs He’s Lost Interest</span></h3> </div> <a class="large_pdf_link pdf_link disabled pdf_link_steps " href="#"> <img class="pdf_link-img" loading="lazy" src="/extensions/wikihow/socialstamp/images/icon-pdf.svg" alt="PDF download" width="150" height="150"> <span class="pdfText">Download Article</span> </a> </div> <div id="steps_2" class="section_text"> <ol class="steps_list_2"> <li id="step-id-111"> <a name="step_2_1" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 1 He avoids you." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/3/3f/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="86f6b0f71a389a629d452fce002cca53" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/3/3f/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('86f6b0f71a389a629d452fce002cca53')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 1 He avoids you." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/3/3f/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/3/3f/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="86f6b0f71a389a629d452fce002cca53"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/3\/3f\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/3\/3f\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">1</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He avoids you.</b> If you’ve gone from chatting every day or hanging out regularly to excuses for why he can’t talk right now or why he’s too busy to get together, he may be <a href="/Tell-if-Someone-Is-Avoiding-You" title="Tell if Someone Is Avoiding You">avoiding you</a>. It could be a temporary thing—maybe he genuinely is busy—but if it continues, and if he offers you no reassurance that there’s an end in sight, he might just be trying to ghost you. </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-112"> <a name="step_2_2" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 2 He stops communicating." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/8/8b/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="fd84845b52f09d38036ab15ff3dc40c0" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/8/8b/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('fd84845b52f09d38036ab15ff3dc40c0')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 2 He stops communicating." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/8/8b/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/8/8b/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="fd84845b52f09d38036ab15ff3dc40c0"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/8\/8b\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/8\/8b\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">2</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He stops communicating.</b> Everything might have been going great: you used to have long conversations about anything and everything. You shared your feelings and thoughts, your hopes and fears and dreams—and then suddenly, nada. What happened? If your guy suddenly shuts you out, it could be a sign he’s lost interest. </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-113"> <a name="step_2_3" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 3 He friendzones you." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/2/25/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="1eb323f3a0d0845a4afd3dbcec1ac63b" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/25/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('1eb323f3a0d0845a4afd3dbcec1ac63b')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 3 He friendzones you." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/25/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/2/25/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="1eb323f3a0d0845a4afd3dbcec1ac63b"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/25\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/2\/25\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">3</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">He friendzones you.</b> Maybe it felt like things were headed toward relationship territory, and then all of a sudden, you notice yourself <a href="/Know-if-You-Are-in-the-Friend-Zone" title="Know if You Are in the Friend Zone">relegated to buddy status</a>: friendly punches on the arm, a certain emotional distance, group hangs only. Friends are great and all…but what the heck? If you find your guy suddenly treating you as a pal—or worse, an acquaintance—you can be sure he’s trying to back away from the whole romance thing. </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-114"> <a name="step_2_4" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 4 You sense a lack of engagement." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/4/47/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="4754b7326833b29134b9035cb3c23964" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/4/47/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('4754b7326833b29134b9035cb3c23964')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 4 You sense a lack of engagement." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/4/47/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/4/47/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="4754b7326833b29134b9035cb3c23964"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/4\/47\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/4\/47\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">4</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">You sense a lack of engagement.</b> Sometimes your gut just <a href="/Tell-When-You%27ve-Been-Rejected" title="Tell When You've Been Rejected">knows when someone has lost interest</a>. You might still talk and hang out, but he’s noticeably not invested in what you’re saying. Maybe he scrolls on his phone while you hang out, or he casually mentions that he’s still on the dating apps. All signs a relationship with this guy probably isn’t in the cards. </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <div class="wh_ad_inner w_label al_grey dfpsmall dfpsmallmethod containerless_ad fluid" data-service="adsense" data-slot="7710650179" data-width="728" data-height="90" data-smallheight="250" data-type="method" data-small="1" data-channels="1179844797" data-smallservice="dfp" data-adunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_sma_meth0" data-size='[[300, 250],"fluid"]' data-apsload="1" data-prebidload="1" data-aps-timeout="800" data-containerless="1" data-fullwidthadsense="1" data-fluidsize="1" data-mediumchannels="3005955957,4066873649" data-smallchannels="2811805837,8156154280" data-aditudetarget="pb-slot-engl-meth" data-largechannels="2060152247,5763098696" data-insertslotvalue="2" data-pagetype="methods" data-observerloading="1" data-sizes-array='[[300, 250],"fluid"]' data-gptdisplaylate="1" data-pbadunits='{"appnexus":29111279,"pubmatic":"4926794","ix":"944751","amx":"d2lraWhvdy5jb20","rubicon":"2756126","shemedia":"2952570","openx":"558892622","triplelift":"Wikihow_engl_gam_sma_meth0_300x250_Prebid","yieldmo":"3204666393567896410","grid":383057,"medianet":"521047606","rise":"engl_gam_sma_meth0","sharethrough":"xZq2HSiUJL1GRBHUi49ybeLd"}'><div id="mobilemethod_ad_2"></div></div> <div class="al_method">Advertisement</div> <script>WH.ads.addBodyAd('mobilemethod_ad_2')</script> </ol> <div class="clearall"></div> </div> </div> <div class="section steps sticky"> <div class="headline_container block_header in-block subheadline"> <div class="altblock"></div> <div class="headline_info"> <div class="method_label">Section 3 of 3:</div> <h3><span class="mw-headline" id="What-You-Can-Do">What You Can Do</span></h3> </div> <a class="large_pdf_link pdf_link disabled pdf_link_steps " href="#"> <img class="pdf_link-img" loading="lazy" src="/extensions/wikihow/socialstamp/images/icon-pdf.svg" alt="PDF download" width="150" height="150"> <span class="pdfText">Download Article</span> </a> </div> <div id="steps_3" class="section_text"> <ol class="steps_list_2"> <li id="step-id-215"> <a name="step_3_1" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 1 Decide whether he’s still worth pursuing." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/8/88/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="83adb4c8db957872238bb7ff9f378f65" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/8/88/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('83adb4c8db957872238bb7ff9f378f65')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 1 Decide whether he’s still worth pursuing." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/8/88/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/8/88/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="83adb4c8db957872238bb7ff9f378f65"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/8\/88\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/8\/88\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">1</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">Decide whether he’s still worth pursuing.</b> Depending on why he’s distancing himself, he might not be a lost cause. If he’s shy or not sure what he wants, you might be able to wait him out or talk it through with him. But if you think he’s playing games, not emotionally available, or just not interested in dating you, let him go. <ul> <li>If he’s afraid of rejection or is <a href="/Get-a-Shy-Guy-to-Admit-He-Likes-You" title="Get a Shy Guy to Admit He Likes You">too shy</a>, or if he’s playing hard to get because he doesn’t know what he’s doing, you may be able to break through the façade and win him over.</li> <li>If he’s trying to mess with your head or just wants sex, it’s probably a waste of your energy to pursue him (unless you <i>also</i> just want sex). </li> <li>If he’s not interested in you—maybe because he’s found someone else or he just doesn’t think you’re compatible—don’t waste your time trying to convince him. There are lots of other fish in the sea. </li> </ul> </div> <div class="green_box expert mobile"> <div class="green_box_expert_head">EXPERT TIP</div> <div class="green_box_person expert" data-link="/Author/John-Keegan"> <div class="green_box_expert_dialog"> <div class="green_box_expert_dialog_upper"> <div class="green_box_person_circle"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/images/thumb/e/e1/John_Keegan2.png/-crop-100-100-100px-John_Keegan2.png.webp"></source><img src="/images/thumb/e/e1/John_Keegan2.png/-crop-100-100-100px-John_Keegan2.png" alt="John Keegan" loading="lazy" width="45" height="45" style="max-width: 45px"></picture></div> <p> <a href="/Author/John-Keegan" class="click_out"> John Keegan </a> </p> Dating Coach </div> John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health. </div> <div class="green_box_person_circle"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/images/thumb/e/e1/John_Keegan2.png/-crop-100-100-100px-John_Keegan2.png.webp"></source><img src="/images/thumb/e/e1/John_Keegan2.png/-crop-100-100-100px-John_Keegan2.png" alt="John Keegan" loading="lazy" width="45" height="45" style="max-width: 45px"></picture></div> <div class="green_box_expert_info"> <a href="/Author/John-Keegan" class="green_box_expert_quote_link click_out"> John Keegan </a> <br> Dating Coach </div> </div> <div class="green_box_content"><p><b>In the very least, it may help to give him some space.</b> Someone who avoids having deep conversations or sharing romantic experiences might not be ready for a more serious relationship, which could be a sign that he needs more time to figure things out for himself.</p></div> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-216"> <a name="step_3_2" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 2 Speak up." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/b/b3/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="962a716cf3f12e993ec75eb7138c7a61" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/b3/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('962a716cf3f12e993ec75eb7138c7a61')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 2 Speak up." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/b3/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/b/b3/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="962a716cf3f12e993ec75eb7138c7a61"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b3\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b3\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">2</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">Speak up.</b> Ask him what the heck is going on so you can figure out whether to keep pursuing him or not. If he can’t give you a straight answer—even if that answer is, “I don’t know”—cut your losses and move on. Whether he’s into you or not, if he can’t communicate with you about what’s going on in his head, he’s probably not worth any more of your time or energy. <ul> <li>Try not to frame it as an accusation; instead, say something like, “I just want to make sure we’re both on the same page,” or “I feel like things have shifted, so I wanted to check in.”</li> <li>He may have lost interest and been too afraid to let you know—or maybe he thinks ghosting is the kinder option.</li> <li>He might be reluctant to share how he’s feeling because he doesn’t know how he’s feeling. In that case, reassure him he doesn’t have to have all the answers or be ready to commit to a lifetime with you, and that he just needs to let you know where he’s at in the moment.</li> </ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-217"> <a name="step_3_3" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 3 Give him space." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/4/49/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="820fad72adf2439179a187972fbbfcce" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/4/49/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('820fad72adf2439179a187972fbbfcce')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 3 Give him space." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/4/49/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/4/49/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="820fad72adf2439179a187972fbbfcce"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/4\/49\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/4\/49\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">3</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">Give him space.</b> He may just need some time to think things through or to get more comfortable dating—but don’t waste your life waiting for him to change. Give him <a href="/Give-Someone-Space-Without-Losing-Them" title="Give Someone Space Without Losing Them">some breathing room</a>, but don’t chase him or put all your eggs into his basket. <ul> <li>The healthy version of that whole distancing dating technique is just...being <a href="/Be-Independent" title="Be Independent">independent</a> and living your life! If he's afraid of commitment, seeing that you have a healthy life balance might help him relax a bit (and really want you). </li> <li> <b>Reader Poll:</b> We asked 1973 wikiHow readers, and <b>51%</b> of them agreed that the best way to reconnect with a guy who has pulled away is to <b>give him space and wait for him to reach out</b>. <a class="dynamic_poll_link" target="_blank" href="/Why-Do-Guys-Distance-Themselves-After-Intimacy#reader_poll_893">[Take Poll]</a> </li> </ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-218"> <a name="step_3_4" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 4 Accept he’s not interested and move on." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/9/9c/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="570dd2a6e48f85f9c0fb1b5b9cae0ddb" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/9/9c/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('570dd2a6e48f85f9c0fb1b5b9cae0ddb')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 4 Accept he’s not interested and move on." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/9/9c/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/9/9c/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="570dd2a6e48f85f9c0fb1b5b9cae0ddb"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/9\/9c\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/9\/9c\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">4</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">Accept he’s not interested and move on.</b> If the reasons for his lack of interest are things you can’t do anything about or move past, then it’s better to <a href="/Move-On" title="Move On">let go and move on</a>. He just isn’t worth the pain. <ul><li>If you really like this guy, it’s probably best to cut ties. Staying connected with him could only make the situation messier and make it harder for you to forget him.</li></ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-219"> <a name="step_3_5" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 5 Avoid self-blame." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/0/00/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="8a456152b51f221a20571199b06a0fc4" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/0/00/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('8a456152b51f221a20571199b06a0fc4')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 5 Avoid self-blame." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/0/00/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/0/00/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="8a456152b51f221a20571199b06a0fc4"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/0\/00\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/0\/00\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">5</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">Avoid self-blame.</b> It’s easy to take rejection personally or to think <i>If only I’d done such-and-such thing differently!</i> But the reality is, if he’s not up for dating or not in a place to date, it’s about him, not you. Take it as a blessing that you figured this out fairly early on. <ul><li>Maybe you knew he wasn’t worth pursuing and are kicking yourself for sticking around anyway—don’t beat yourself up. We’ve all been there! Use it as a learning experience for the future. </li></ul> </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li id="step-id-220"> <a name="step_3_6" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 6 Focus on yourself." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/a/a6/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="b6c36b17b75f89041c3f14fdf62513d5" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/a/a6/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('b6c36b17b75f89041c3f14fdf62513d5')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 6 Focus on yourself." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/a/a6/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/a/a6/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="b6c36b17b75f89041c3f14fdf62513d5"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/a\/a6\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/a\/a6\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">6</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">Focus on yourself.</b> You might have already invested a considerable amount of time and energy into this guy, and that can be really hard. <a href="/Love-Yourself" title="Love Yourself">Be kind to yourself</a> at this time. <a href="/Focus-on-Yourself" title="Focus on Yourself">Focus on the things you love</a>, your passions, your friends. <a href="/Eat-Healthy" title="Eat Healthy">Eat well</a> and <a href="/Exercise" title="Exercise">move your body</a>. Spend time in nature. Cuddle an animal, smell a flower. </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <li class="final_li" id="step-id-221"> <a name="step_3_7" class="stepanchor"></a><div class="mwimg largeimage floatcenter " style="max-width:728px"><a href="#/Image:When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg" class="image"><div class="content-spacer" style="padding-top:75%"> <img alt="Step 7 Keep dating." decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/b/b7/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="0427b0a2eb267739c44b92eacc0d33b0" data-src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/b7/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg"><script>WH.shared.addScrollLoadItem('0427b0a2eb267739c44b92eacc0d33b0')</script> </div> <noscript><img alt="Step 7 Keep dating." src="https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/b7/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg" decoding="async" class="whcdn content-fill" data-srclarge="/images/thumb/b/b7/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg" data-width="460" data-height="345" id="0427b0a2eb267739c44b92eacc0d33b0"></noscript> <div class="image_details" style="display:none;"><span style="display:none;">{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b7\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b7\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg\/v4-728px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2024 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}</span></div></a></div> <div class="step_num" aria-hidden="true">7</div><div class="step"> <b class="whb" aria-hidden="true">Keep dating.</b> Don’t give up hope just because things didn’t work out with this guy. If you were really into him, it’s OK to pause and take some time to reflect and heal a little, but don’t count out the possibility of a truly great romance with someone else. As they say, sometimes things fall apart so other things can fall together. </div> <div class="clearall"></div> <div class="scrolltomarker" data-isstep="1"></div> </li> <div class="wh_ad_inner w_label al_grey dfpsmall dfpsmallmethod containerless_ad fluid" data-service="adsense" data-slot="7710650179" data-width="728" data-height="90" data-smallheight="250" data-type="method" data-small="1" data-channels="1179844797" data-smallservice="dfp" data-adunitpath="/10095428/engl/engl_gam_sma_meth0" data-size='[[300, 250],"fluid"]' data-apsload="1" data-prebidload="1" data-aps-timeout="800" data-containerless="1" data-fullwidthadsense="1" data-fluidsize="1" data-mediumchannels="3005955957,4066873649" data-smallchannels="2811805837,8156154280" data-aditudetarget="pb-slot-engl-meth" data-largechannels="2060152247,5763098696" data-insertslotvalue="3" data-pagetype="methods" data-observerloading="1" data-sizes-array='[[300, 250],"fluid"]' data-gptdisplaylate="1" 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Kate Dreyfus is a dedicated Holistic Love Coach, Holistic Empowerment Coach, Heart-Centered Expert, Intuitive Healer, Workshop Facilitator, and Owner of Evolve & Empower. She has more than ten years of experience supporting her clients successfully entering exclusive, romantic relationships within the USA, the United Kingdom, Canada, and Europe. Kate is devoted to helping others through personal growth and transformation, success in dating and romance, and healing and rebuilding after a breakup. She is also a member of The Biofield Institute, the Healing Touch Professional Association, and the Energy Medicine Professional Association. Kate holds a BA in Psychology from San Francisco State University. 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class="clearall"><script type="application/ld+json">{ "@context": "http:\/\/schema.org", "@type": "Article", "headline": "When a Guy Acts Interested then Backs Off: 10 Reasons Why", "name": "When a Guy Acts Interested then Backs Off: 10 Reasons Why", "mainEntityOfPage": { "@type": "WebPage", "id": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off" }, "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b7\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg\/v4-1200px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg", "width": 1200, "height": 900 }, "author": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Kate Dreyfus", "sameAs": [ "https:\/\/www.evolveandempower.com\/", "https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/katedreyfus" ] }, "datePublished": "2023-01-05", "dateModified": "2024-11-11", "publisher": { "@context": "http:\/\/schema.org", "@type": "Organization", "name": "wikiHow", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/skins\/owl\/images\/wikihow_logo_nobg_60.png", "width": 326, "height": 60 }, "sameAs": [ "https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/wikiHow\/", "https:\/\/twitter.com\/wikiHow", "https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/wikihow\/", "https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/company\/wikihow\/", "https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/user\/WikiHow" ] }, "description": "Understand his mixed signals\u2014and whether you should keep pursuing him or move onFew things feel as good as the butterflies you get when you think the guy you're into might like you back. But what do you do when that very same guy suddenly..." }</script><script type="application/ld+json">{ "@context": "http:\/\/schema.org", "@type": "HowTo", "headline": "When a Guy Acts Interested then Backs Off: 10 Reasons Why", "name": "When a Guy Acts Interested then Backs Off: 10 Reasons Why", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b7\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg\/v4-1200px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg", "width": 1200, "height": 900 }, "author": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Kate Dreyfus", "sameAs": [ "https:\/\/www.evolveandempower.com\/", "https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/katedreyfus" ] }, "datePublished": "2023-01-05", "dateModified": "2024-11-11", "publisher": { "@context": "http:\/\/schema.org", "@type": "Organization", "name": "wikiHow", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/skins\/owl\/images\/wikihow_logo_nobg_60.png", "width": 326, "height": 60 }, "sameAs": [ "https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/wikiHow\/", "https:\/\/twitter.com\/wikiHow", "https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/wikihow\/", "https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/company\/wikihow\/", "https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/user\/WikiHow" ] }, "step": [ { "@type": "HowToSection", "name": "Possible Reasons Why", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He\u2019s running from his emotions. Dating can bring up a lot of difficult feelings. He may like you but find it too overwhelming to pursue a relationship\u2014or maybe he\u2019s just emotionally unavailable.\n\nIt\u2019s possible past experiences have colored his current outlook. He may just need time to overcome those experiences\u2014but don\u2019t cross your fingers.\nHe might be afraid to let someone in. Hey, love is a scary, scary thing! The thought of getting close to someone and the relationship falling apart is enough to drive a lot of people away from dating altogether.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/1\/14\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-1.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-00" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He\u2019s got a fear of commitment. Sounds like a clich\u00e9, but it happens. Some people interpret \u201crelationship\u201d as \u201cball and chain,\u201d and this guy could be one of those. He might still have some wild oats to sow, or whatever. Trust us, it\u2019s not worth getting involved with someone like this.\nIt\u2019s possible you\u2019re one of several irons he\u2019s got in the fire. He could be refusing to commit to a single person because he\u2019s interested in seeing multiple people at once, so unless you\u2019re OK with that, it might not work out with this guy.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c7\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-2.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-01" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He\u2019s just had a bad breakup. He might be backing away because he\u2019s just not ready to dive into something yet. He could be super into you and see you as relationship material, but if he\u2019s not ready to date yet, he might give you a lot of mixed signals about his interest and availability.\nHe may just need to move slowly with you, but there\u2019s a difference between recovering from a breakup and not being over his ex, so proceed with caution. If he\u2019s hung up on his ex, a relationship with this guy is almost certain to be dissatisfying.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/22\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-3.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-02" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He thinks distancing is a dating technique. Oy vey! There are a lot of \u201cdating experts\u201d out there promulgating the idea that playing hot-and-cold is the way to win someone\u2019s heart. And this form of gameplaying isn\u2019t totally based in myth: studies show we\u2019re pretty much all wired to want what we can\u2019t have. It\u2019s basic reverse psychology. Your guy could be trying to use the \u201cscarcity mindset\u201d to his benefit\u2014but ask yourself, do you want him because you want him, or because you think you can\u2019t have him?\nThis seduction tactic is often employed by people with low self-esteem (as is its cousin, negging) and is designed to lower your self-esteem enough that you think he\u2019s a catch.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/8\/83\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-4.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-03" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He may be dating around. It\u2019s possible he\u2019s seeing multiple people at once, and even if he really likes you, he might not be ready to stop playing the field. If he doesn\u2019t seem to be invested in you, it could just be that his interest is divided among several different people at once.\nIf his interest has noticeably waned, it could mean he\u2019s met someone else he\u2019s more interested in.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/f\/fd\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-5.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-04" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He has a fear of rejection. He may be acting like he isn\u2019t into you because he\u2019s afraid you\u2019re not into him. The instinct for self-preservation may lead him to ghost you\u2014or to at least be super wary of showing you too much interest. You hold his heart in the palm of your hand like a fluttering little bird.\n\nHe might think he\u2019s not good enough for you. Humility is a great characteristic in a partner, but insecurity\u2026not so much.\nIt\u2019s possible he\u2019s waiting for you to make more moves! Ask yourself if you\u2019ve made it clear that you like him and want to pursue something with him\u2014or if you\u2019ve been waiting on him to make the moves.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b9\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-6-Version-2.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-05" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "Things are moving too fast for him. He may be all in\u2014just slowly. If he feels like there\u2019s any pressure to dive into a committed relationship and pick out wedding rings and baby names and the rocking chairs you\u2019ll be rocking in together when you\u2019re 92, anxiety might lead him to distance himself from you. He may not be sure how he feels about you and just need a little time to figure it out, or he may really like you and have cold feet.\n\nIf you suspect this pertains to your guy, take it slow! His cold feet might thaw out in time.\nYou may not be ready for a big commitment either\u2014but make sure he knows that! He\u2019ll take comfort in knowing there\u2019s no pressure.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/2a\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-7.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-06" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He has other priorities right now. He could be busy with work or preparing for a big cross-country move. He could be focusing on his health. He could be a superhero whose only mistress is the city he defends. There could be any number of important things distracting him from dating. He might really like you, but if the timing is wrong, it\u2019s probably not meant to be.\nIt\u2019s also possible that you\u2019re not what he wants right now. Maybe you\u2019re relationship material, and he\u2019s looking for a fling, or vice versa. Like ships passing in the night.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/d\/dd\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-8.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-07" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He\u2019s too shy to make a move. You might interpret his distance as a lack of interest when in fact, the poor dude is positively squirming inside trying to figure out how to take things to the next level. He may be unsure how to go about sharing his real feelings, or maybe he\u2019s afraid being more direct will come off too forward.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/25\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-9.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-08" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He only wants a sexual relationship. He may have detected that you\u2019re interested in more than just hooking up, and he\u2019s trying to back away slowly. His sudden lack of interest could signal he wants to end things, or that he wants to keep you at a distance. Either way, if he\u2019s not interested in more than sex, and you are, it\u2019s probably not a good match.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/3\/3f\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-10.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-09" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "You\u2019re just not \u201cthe one.\u201d Ouch. Kudos to him, we suppose, for knowing what he wants early and dipping out, but he could be a little more direct and communicate what he\u2019s thinking. In any case, rejection hurts, but remember that more likely than not, it\u2019s not personal\u2014your \u201cone\u201d (if you believe in that) is someone else.\n\nHe may have picked up on a random red flag while getting to know you\u2014something he just doesn\u2019t want in his romantic life.\nHe might have realized you\u2019re not compatible\u2014maybe you don\u2019t have the same goals or interests or values\u2014and it\u2019s likely that if you kept dating, you would realize it too.\n\nMaybe he just felt like you didn\u2019t gel! The heart wants what it wants (and it doesn\u2019t want what it doesn\u2019t want).", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/a\/a3\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-11-Version-2.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-010" } ] }, { "@type": "HowToSection", "name": "Signs He\u2019s Lost Interest", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He avoids you. If you\u2019ve gone from chatting every day or hanging out regularly to excuses for why he can\u2019t talk right now or why he\u2019s too busy to get together, he may be avoiding you. It could be a temporary thing\u2014maybe he genuinely is busy\u2014but if it continues, and if he offers you no reassurance that there\u2019s an end in sight, he might just be trying to ghost you.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/3\/3f\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-12.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-111" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He stops communicating. Everything might have been going great: you used to have long conversations about anything and everything. You shared your feelings and thoughts, your hopes and fears and dreams\u2014and then suddenly, nada. What happened? If your guy suddenly shuts you out, it could be a sign he\u2019s lost interest.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/8\/8b\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-13.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-112" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "He friendzones you. Maybe it felt like things were headed toward relationship territory, and then all of a sudden, you notice yourself relegated to buddy status: friendly punches on the arm, a certain emotional distance, group hangs only. Friends are great and all\u2026but what the heck? If you find your guy suddenly treating you as a pal\u2014or worse, an acquaintance\u2014you can be sure he\u2019s trying to back away from the whole romance thing.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/2\/25\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-14.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-113" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "You sense a lack of engagement. Sometimes your gut just knows when someone has lost interest. You might still talk and hang out, but he\u2019s noticeably not invested in what you\u2019re saying. Maybe he scrolls on his phone while you hang out, or he casually mentions that he\u2019s still on the dating apps. All signs a relationship with this guy probably isn\u2019t in the cards.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/4\/47\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-15.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-114" } ] }, { "@type": "HowToSection", "name": "What You Can Do", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "Decide whether he\u2019s still worth pursuing. Depending on why he\u2019s distancing himself, he might not be a lost cause. If he\u2019s shy or not sure what he wants, you might be able to wait him out or talk it through with him. But if you think he\u2019s playing games, not emotionally available, or just not interested in dating you, let him go.\n\nIf he\u2019s afraid of rejection or is too shy, or if he\u2019s playing hard to get because he doesn\u2019t know what he\u2019s doing, you may be able to break through the fa\u00e7ade and win him over.\nIf he\u2019s trying to mess with your head or just wants sex, it\u2019s probably a waste of your energy to pursue him (unless you also just want sex).\n\nIf he\u2019s not interested in you\u2014maybe because he\u2019s found someone else or he just doesn\u2019t think you\u2019re compatible\u2014don\u2019t waste your time trying to convince him. There are lots of other fish in the sea.\tEXPERT TIP\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tJohn Keegan\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tJohn Keegan\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tDating Coach\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tJohn Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.\t\t\t\t\tJohn Keegan\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tJohn Keegan\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tDating Coach\t\t\t\tIn the very least, it may help to give him some space. Someone who avoids having deep conversations or sharing romantic experiences might not be ready for a more serious relationship, which could be a sign that he needs more time to figure things out for himself.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/8\/88\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-16.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-215" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "Speak up. Ask him what the heck is going on so you can figure out whether to keep pursuing him or not. If he can\u2019t give you a straight answer\u2014even if that answer is, \u201cI don\u2019t know\u201d\u2014cut your losses and move on. Whether he\u2019s into you or not, if he can\u2019t communicate with you about what\u2019s going on in his head, he\u2019s probably not worth any more of your time or energy.\n\nTry not to frame it as an accusation; instead, say something like, \u201cI just want to make sure we\u2019re both on the same page,\u201d or \u201cI feel like things have shifted, so I wanted to check in.\u201d\nHe may have lost interest and been too afraid to let you know\u2014or maybe he thinks ghosting is the kinder option.\nHe might be reluctant to share how he\u2019s feeling because he doesn\u2019t know how he\u2019s feeling. In that case, reassure him he doesn\u2019t have to have all the answers or be ready to commit to a lifetime with you, and that he just needs to let you know where he\u2019s at in the moment.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b3\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-17.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-216" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "Give him space. He may just need some time to think things through or to get more comfortable dating\u2014but don\u2019t waste your life waiting for him to change. Give him some breathing room, but don\u2019t chase him or put all your eggs into his basket.\n\nThe healthy version of that whole distancing dating technique is just...being independent and living your life! If he's afraid of commitment, seeing that you have a healthy life balance might help him relax a bit (and really want you).\n\n\nReader Poll: We asked 1973 wikiHow readers, and 51% of them agreed that the best way to reconnect with a guy who has pulled away is to give him space and wait for him to reach out. [Take Poll]", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/4\/49\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-18.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-217" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "Accept he\u2019s not interested and move on. If the reasons for his lack of interest are things you can\u2019t do anything about or move past, then it\u2019s better to let go and move on. He just isn\u2019t worth the pain.\nIf you really like this guy, it\u2019s probably best to cut ties. Staying connected with him could only make the situation messier and make it harder for you to forget him.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/9\/9c\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-19.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-218" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "Avoid self-blame. It\u2019s easy to take rejection personally or to think If only I\u2019d done such-and-such thing differently! But the reality is, if he\u2019s not up for dating or not in a place to date, it\u2019s about him, not you. Take it as a blessing that you figured this out fairly early on.\nMaybe you knew he wasn\u2019t worth pursuing and are kicking yourself for sticking around anyway\u2014don\u2019t beat yourself up. We\u2019ve all been there! Use it as a learning experience for the future.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/0\/00\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-20.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-219" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "Focus on yourself. You might have already invested a considerable amount of time and energy into this guy, and that can be really hard. Be kind to yourself at this time. Focus on the things you love, your passions, your friends. Eat well and move your body. Spend time in nature. Cuddle an animal, smell a flower.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/a\/a6\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-21.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-220" }, { "@type": "HowToStep", "text": "Keep dating. Don\u2019t give up hope just because things didn\u2019t work out with this guy. If you were really into him, it\u2019s OK to pause and take some time to reflect and heal a little, but don\u2019t count out the possibility of a truly great romance with someone else. As they say, sometimes things fall apart so other things can fall together.", "image": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b7\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg\/v4-460px-When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off-Step-22.jpg", "url": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off#step-id-221" } ] } ], "description": "Understand his mixed signals\u2014and whether you should keep pursuing him or move onFew things feel as good as the butterflies you get when you think the guy you're into might like you back. But what do you do when that very same guy suddenly..." }</script><script type="application/ld+json">{ "@context": "http:\/\/schema.org", "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@id": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com", "name": "wikiHow" } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@id": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/Category:Relationships", "name": "Relationships" } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@id": "https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/When-a-Guy-Acts-Interested-then-Backs-Off", "name": "When a Guy Acts Interested then Backs Off: 10 Reasons Why" } } ] }</script> <div id="fb-root" ></div> <div id="footer" role="navigation"> <div id="footer_inner"> <a href='/Main-Page' id="footer_logo"> <img src='/skins/owl/images/wikihow_logo_intl.png' width='162' height='42' alt='wikiHow' /> </a> <div id="footer_crumbs"> <ul class="breadcrumbs"> <li><a href="/Special:CategoryListing" 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