Building respectful relationships

<!DOCTYPE html> <html lang="en" dir="ltr"> <head> <meta charset="utf-8"> <link rel="profile" href="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml/vocab" /> <meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1"> <link rel="apple-touch-icon-precomposed" sizes="57x57" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/apple-touch-icon-57x57.png" /> <link rel="apple-touch-icon-precomposed" sizes="114x114" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/apple-touch-icon-114x114.png" /> <link rel="apple-touch-icon-precomposed" sizes="72x72" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/apple-touch-icon-72x72.png" /> <link rel="apple-touch-icon-precomposed" sizes="144x144" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/apple-touch-icon-144x144.png" /> <link rel="apple-touch-icon-precomposed" sizes="60x60" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/apple-touch-icon-60x60.png" /> <link rel="apple-touch-icon-precomposed" sizes="120x120" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/apple-touch-icon-120x120.png" /> <link rel="apple-touch-icon-precomposed" sizes="76x76" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/apple-touch-icon-76x76.png" /> <link rel="apple-touch-icon-precomposed" sizes="152x152" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/apple-touch-icon-152x152.png" /> <link rel="icon" type="image/png" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/favicon-196x196.png" sizes="196x196" /> <link rel="icon" type="image/png" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/favicon-96x96.png" sizes="96x96" /> <link rel="icon" type="image/png" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/favicon-32x32.png" sizes="32x32" /> <link rel="icon" type="image/png" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/favicon-16x16.png" sizes="16x16" /> <link rel="icon" type="image/png" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/favicon-128.png" sizes="128x128" /> <meta name="application-name" content=" "/> <meta name="msapplication-TileColor" content="#FFFFFF" /> <meta name="msapplication-TileImage" content="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/mstile-144x144.png" /> <meta name="msapplication-square70x70logo" content="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/mstile-70x70.png" /> <meta name="msapplication-square150x150logo" content="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/mstile-150x150.png" /> <meta name="msapplication-wide310x150logo" content="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/mstile-310x150.png" /> <meta name="msapplication-square310x310logo" content="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/imgs/favicon/mstile-310x310.png" /> <link rel="stylesheet" href="/sites/all/themes/kidshelpline/animate.min.css"> <meta name="theme-color" content="#ffffff"> <meta name="format-detection" content="telephone=no" /> <meta http-equiv="PICS-Label" content='(PICS-1.1 "http://www.classify.org/safesurf/" l r (SS~~000 0))'>  <script>(function(w,d,s,l,i){w[l]=w[l]||[];w[l].push({'gtm.start': new Date().getTime(),event:'gtm.js'});var f=d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0], j=d.createElement(s),dl=l!='dataLayer'?'&l='+l:'';j.async=true;j.src= 'https://www.googletagmanager.com/gtm.js?id='+i+dl;f.parentNode.insertBefore(j,f); })(window,document,'script','dataLayer','GTM-KDDZM3C');</script>  <style>.async-hide { opacity: 0 !important} </style> <script>(function(a,s,y,n,c,h,i,d,e){s.className+=' '+y;h.start=1*new Date; h.end=i=function(){s.className=s.className.replace(RegExp(' ?'+y),'')}; (a[n]=a[n]||[]).hide=h;setTimeout(function(){i();h.end=null},c);h.timeout=c; })(window,document.documentElement,'async-hide','dataLayer',4000, {'GTM-KDDZM3C':true});</script>   <script> (function(h,o,t,j,a,r){ h.hj=h.hj||function(){(h.hj.q=h.hj.q||[]).push(arguments)}; h._hjSettings={hjid:715533,hjsv:6}; a=o.getElementsByTagName('head')[0]; r=o.createElement('script');r.async=1; r.src=t+h._hjSettings.hjid+j+h._hjSettings.hjsv; a.appendChild(r); })(window,document,'https://static.hotjar.com/c/hotjar-','.js?sv='); </script>   <script src="https://use.typekit.net/akt8xku.js"></script> <script>try{Typekit.load({ async: true });}catch(e){}</script>  <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8" /> <link rel="shortcut icon" href="https://kidshelpline.com.au/favicon.ico" type="image/vnd.microsoft.icon" /> <meta name="description" content="As a parent, it is only natural you want to help your kids build self-esteem and be respectful to others. Learn more by getting in contact with us today!" /> <meta name="generator" content="Drupal 7 (http://drupal.org)" /> <link rel="canonical" href="https://kidshelpline.com.au/parents/issues/building-respectful-relationships" /> <link rel="shortlink" href="https://kidshelpline.com.au/node/1866" /> <meta property="og:site_name" content="Kids Helpline" /> <meta property="og:type" content="article" /> <meta property="og:title" content="The word 'respect' gets used often but what does it really mean?" /> <meta property="og:url" content="https://kidshelpline.com.au/parents/issues/building-respectful-relationships" /> <meta property="og:description" content="Let's explore how to build respectful relationships." /> <meta property="og:updated_time" content="2020-03-26T15:49:43+10:00" /> <meta property="og:image" content="https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1-P-BRR-THUMBNAIL.png" /> <meta property="og:image:url" 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class="main-subtitle mtop30 col-xs-12 col-md-8 col-md-offset-2"> <p class="font--24 line-height--30">As a parent, you play an important role in helping your kids build self-respect and knowing how to be respectful to others.</p> </div> </div> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full">  <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix">  <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full">  <div class="bdl-image"> <div class="mtop20">  <img class="img-responsive" src="https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/bdl_image/Header-P-BRR.png" alt="Girl sitting on stairs and thinking about what respect means" title="Girl sitting on stairs and thinking about what respect means"> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--pink font--28 mtop30"> <div class="body"><h3>As parents, we often value respect enormously! We ask for it and expect to receive it from our kids.</h3></div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--24 line-height--30 mtop30 font--dark_blue mbottom30"> <div class="body"><h3>Respect is a word that often gets used but is difficult to define.</h3></div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="mtop20"> <div class="body"><p>Most people would tell you they know when they are being treated respectfully. However they might have trouble knowing when their own communication is disrespectful.</p><p> </p></div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--pink font--28 mtop30"> <div class="body"><h3>What kinds of respect do you expect?</h3></div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--24 line-height--30 mtop30 font--dark_blue"> <div class="body"><h3>Respect exists in relationships at many levels.</h3></div> </div> </div> </div> </div></div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix">  <div class=""> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full">  <div class="bdl bdl-tile"> <div class=" ">  <div class="tile col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-4"> <div class="tile-img" style="background-image:url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1A-P-BRR-%20resized.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <div class="tile-tag">Self-respect</div> </div> <div class="buttons"><div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> </div></div> </div>  <div class="tile col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-4"> <div class="tile-img" style="background-image:url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1B-P-BRR-.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <div class="tile-tag">Respect for others</div> </div> <div class="buttons"><div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> </div></div> </div>  <div class="tile col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-4"> <div class="tile-img" style="background-image:url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1C-P-BRR-.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <div class="tile-tag">Respect for possessions</div> </div> <div class="buttons"><div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> </div></div> </div>  <div class="tile col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-6"> <div class="tile-img" style="background-image:url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1D-P-BRR-%20resized.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <div class="tile-tag">Respect for authority</div> </div> <div class="buttons"><div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> </div></div> </div>  <div class="tile col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-6"> <div class="tile-img" style="background-image:url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1E-P-BRR-.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <div class="tile-tag">Respect for the law</div> </div> <div class="buttons"><div class="field-collection-container clearfix"> </div></div> </div> </div> </div>  </div> </div></div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-bullet-items" style="background-color: #b3d235"> <div class="mtop60 container"> <div class="titles text-center"> <h2 class="title">How do you recognise respect in a relationship?</h2> <div class="subtitle"><p>In respectful relationships, the following are put into action:</p></div> </div> <div class="items col-xs-12 col-md-8 col-md-offset-2 mtop40"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"><div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Rights to be safe, valued and cared for</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Listening and taking turns to be heard</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Being supported to make our own choices</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Freedom to disagree without being put down, called names or hurt</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Being accepted as a person even if you’ve made a mistake</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Trust, honesty and taking care with others personal information</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Sexual activity is legal and consent is sought</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Not behaving in a way that is intimidating especially during conflict</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Supporting others needs and wellbeing</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Not dominating others</p></div> </div> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix">  <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full">  <div class="bdl bdl-callout" style="background-color: #b3d235"> <div class=""> <p>“As a Dad I’m aware that I need to step up and encourage my kids to learn about respectful relationships”</p><p><strong>– Nash, father of 10 year old son and 13 year old daughter</strong></p> </div> <div class="arrow" style="background-color: #b3d235"></div> </div> </div> </div></div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container pbottom40" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix">  <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full">  <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--pink font--28 mtop30"> <div class="body"><h3>How can I help my kids learn respect?</h3></div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--24 line-height--30 mtop30 font--dark_blue mbottom30"> <div class="body"><h3>As a parent, think back over how you learned what respect and disrespect looks like. Take stock of how you and others in your family communicate, particularly when under stress.</h3></div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="mtop20"> <div class="body"><p>Young people look to the adults around them for role modelling. For example, if an adult treats them with care and consideration, they'll learn to offer this to others. This modelling also helps them recognise when disrespect is occurring among their peers.</p></div> </div> </div> </div> </div></div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-bullet-items" style="background-color: #b3d235"> <div class="mtop60 pbottom60 container"> <div class="titles text-center"> <h2 class="title">What creates respectful relationships?</h2> <div class="subtitle"><p>Specific skills and behaviours can help!</p></div> </div> <div class="items col-xs-12 col-md-8 col-md-offset-2 mtop40"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix"><div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Understanding and empathy – what’s your child’s world like right now?</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Active listening – "so what I heard you say is…"</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Anger management – stop, think, speak</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Assertiveness – avoid being too passive or aggressive</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Conflict resolution – identify non-negotiables early, then be open to compromise</p></div> <div class="item col-xs-12 col-sm-6"> <label for="item"> </label> <p>Problem solving and decision making – avoid imposing solutions, help them think through the pros and cons</p></div> </div> </div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl-wrapper"> <div class="mtop40 container" data-bg="" style="background-image: url(); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: cover; background-position: center; "> <div class="wrapper-bdl-wrapper-row"> <div class="field-collection-container clearfix">  <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-8 col-sm-offset-2"> <div class="paragraphs-items paragraphs-items-field-bundle paragraphs-items-field-bundle-full paragraphs-items-full">  <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="font--pink font--28 mtop30"> <div class="body"><h3>Parenting is sometimes hard but there’s always somebody you can talk to or something you can try</h3></div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-text clearfix"> <div class="mtop20"> <div class="body"><p>If you’re struggling with a parenting issue then call a <a href="https://www.parentline.com.au/">Parentline</a> service in your State or Territory.</p></div> </div> </div> </div> </div></div> <div class="clearfix"></div> </div> </div> </div>   <div class="bdl bdl-review-date"> <div class="ptop40"> <div class="body"><em>This content was last reviewed <span class="date-display-single">14/02/2018</span></em></div> </div> </div>  <div class="bdl bdl-recommendation container mbottom40"> <h3 class="mainTitle text-center">Check these out too:</h3> <div class="mainContainer"> <a href="/parents/issues/building-healthy-family-relationships"> <div class="view_item col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-3"> <div class="internalContainer col-xs-12" style="background-color:"> <div class="squareImage" style="background-image: url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1thumbnail-P-BHFR.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <p class="title">Building healthy family relationships</p> <p class="subtitle">Healthy family relationships are important for your child’s wellbeing and development. ...</p> <span class="link">READ ME</span> </div> </div> </div> </a> <a href="/parents/issues/communication-tips"> <div class="view_item col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-3"> <div class="internalContainer col-xs-12" style="background-color:"> <div class="squareImage" style="background-image: url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/1thumbnail-P-CT.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <p class="title">Communication tips</p> <p class="subtitle">Young people often tell Kids Helpline they find it difficult to communicate ...</p> <span class="link">READ ME</span> </div> </div> </div> </a> <a href="/parents/issues/cultural-differences-and-conflict"> <div class="view_item col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-3"> <div class="internalContainer col-xs-12" style="background-color:"> <div class="squareImage" style="background-image: url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/THUMBNAIL-P-CDAC-.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <p class="title">Cultural differences and conflict</p> <p class="subtitle">Our kids’ wellbeing is impacted by cross cultural issues, often through discrimination ...</p> <span class="link">READ ME</span> </div> </div> </div> </a> <a href="/parents/issues/how-parentline-can-help-you"> <div class="view_item col-xs-12 col-sm-6 col-md-3"> <div class="internalContainer col-xs-12" style="background-color:"> <div class="squareImage" style="background-image: url(https://kidshelpline.com.au/sites/default/files/thumbnail-P-HPCHY.png)"></div> <div class="content"> <p class="title">How Parentline can help you</p> <p class="subtitle">Parenting can be a tough job but also really rewarding. 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the session is not about right and wrong, it's a discussion where everyone's thoughts are valid. It's equally okay not to speak up during the session, as long as students are listening (we emphasise this point because some sensitive issues can come up and students may need to process these silently).</div> </div> <div class="col-xs-12 row mtop40 text-left"> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-5 font--20 line-height--26 font--semibold">If you show enthusiasm and interest in the session, from our experience, your class will too.</div> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-6 font--18 line-height--24 pright40">Although the sessions are pre-written, we make them as interactive as possible and have the capacity to be quite responsive to students' interest/needs. There is room for students to ask questions or raise issues that are off the chosen topic (the counsellor will make sure all the necessary information is covered during the session).</div> </div> <div class="col-xs-12 row mtop40 text-left"> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-5 font--20 line-height--26 font--semibold">Students are usually quite excited to participate in these sessions and engage very well.</div> <div class="col-xs-12 col-sm-6 font--18 line-height--24 pright40">However, if you notice that your class is not engaging well in the session, please feel free to signal this to the counsellor and intervene to settle the class, mediate or "translate" some of the ideas into language or examples that you know your class will respond to.</div> </div> <div class="buttons col-xs-12 text-center mtop40"> <a class="btn btn_primary" href="https://www.yourtown.com.au/online/khl/at-school-booking-form.php" target="_blank">Continue to Booking Page</a> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div>   <div class="modal fade khl-modal" id="getHelpModal" tabindex="-1" role="dialog" aria-labelledby="myModalLabel" aria-hidden="true"> <div class="modal-dialog big-modal"> <div class="modal-content"> <button type="button" class="close" data-dismiss="modal"><span aria-hidden="true">×</span></button> <div class="modal-body"> <div class="row"> <div class="col-12 header-section text-center"> <h2 class="font--pink">We're here for you. 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