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Ma quando non si riesce a portare a termine l’ennesimo «beviamoci una cosa dopo il lavoro» perché il divano sembra molto più seducente che parlare con l’ennesimo sconosciuto dei vostri hobby, come ci si comporta? Semplice: non fate nulla. Non andate all’appuntamento. Non forzatevi a partecipare a un’altra stressante e inconcludente sessione di domande e risposte. Per poi passare il giorno dopo a trastullarvi sul perché non abbiate ancora trovato l’uomo giusto. Rilassatevi e non fate alcun programma.«Spesso associamo l’inizio di una relazione con la produttività», racconta Clara Artschwager, mental coach specializzata in incontri e relazioni, «tendiamo a pensare di doverci impegnare di più per ottenere ciò che vogliamo». Ma se gli appuntamenti hanno smesso di essere soddisfacenti o quantomeno piacevoli tre app di dating fa, intestardirsi a portare avanti questi incontri potrebbe, in realtà, peggiorare la situazione. «Essere bloccati in un ciclo di primi appuntamenti o di appuntamenti che raramente vanno oltre il terzo oil quarto incontro è un segno evidente del fatto che potrebbe essere utile prendersi una pausa e fare un passo indietro» spiega Artschwager.L’ideale sarebbe un break di almeno 30 giorni. È un periodo abbastanza lungo per ricaricarvi e individuare eventuali schemi fallimentari nella vostra vita sentimentale. E può anche essere un’ottima occasione per pensare a come rendere più eccitante il proverbiale “ritorno in pista”. Nel frattempo, potete seguire questi consigli per ottenere il massimo dal vostro meritatissimo mese sabbatico. Godetevi un po’ di silenzioDopo un appuntamento si impiega un sacco di tempo ad assillarsi con domande tipo: perché non mi ha risposto? Dovrei cambiare le foto del mio profilo? Gli sarà piaciuto baciarmi? Perché è sparito? Tutto questo trambusto non lascia molto spazio alla possibilità di fare un passo indietro e guardare con lucidità i fatti per capire che cosa ha funzionato e che cosa no. Ecco perché Artschwager suggerisce di allenarsi, di pulire la casa, di fare un giro in macchina, o qualsiasi altra attività durante la quale ascoltereste normalmente musica, in silenzio. In questo modo, potreste trovare le risposte che non riuscivate a vedere prima. Fate qualcosa semplicemente per il gusto di farlo – e fatelo in solitariaQuel corso di recitazione che avete sempre voluto fare? La gara perla quale non avete mai trovato il tempo di allenarvi? Una settimana in una località tropicale? Fatelo. Imparare a stare da soli aiuta a conoscersi meglio e quindi a capire di cosa si ha davvero bisogno all’interno di una relazione. Inoltre, la sollecitudine e la costanza nell’impegno vi daranno un senso di orgoglio e di realizzazione, aumentando la fiducia in voi stessi.Cercate sostegno in un amicoParlate della vostra frustrazione con una persona a cui siete particolarmente legati, non necessariamente perché lei può aiutarvi a trovare una soluzione ai vostri problemi, ma per sentirvi rassicurati riguardo alle scelte che avete fatto. «Sentirsi amati e apprezzati è essenziale quando si sta cercando di ricalibrarsi», spiega Artschwager, che sottolinea anche che aprendosi con le persone care si ottengono affetto e attenzioni, il che può aprire la strada a un maggiore benessere futuro. Se proprio non avete voglia di parlarne, trovate un podcast, un libro, un articolo in cui qualcun altro che condivide le vostre stesse difficoltà possa darvi la conferma di non essere soli.Tornate in pista solo se pensate di potervi divertireSaprete di essere pronti a tornare sul ring quando l’idea vi susciterà un’autentica eccitazione e non vi sembrerà solo un impegno gravoso. Quando gli appuntamenti sembreranno di nuovo divertenti e non qualcosa che sentite di dover fare perché «il tempo sta per scadere», raccomanda Artschwager, «e questa energia sarà idealmente accompagnata da un nuovo senso di chiarezza su ciò che state cercando». Ricordate però di muovervi con cautela, in modo da evitare un nuovo burn out. È meglio fissare solo uno o due appuntamenti al mese che vi interessino davvero, piuttosto che sovraccaricare il vostro calendario con una folle corsa alle uscite serali. Essere selettivi nelle proprie scelte aiuta inoltre ad attrarre persone con valori simili, che, probabilmente, sono anche molto più compatibili con voi.","wordCount":695,"articleSection":"Sesso & Relazioni","image":[{"@type":"ImageObject","height":1200,"thumbnail":"https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731509150.jpg?crop=0.668xw:1.00xh;0.245xw,0&resize=100:*","url":"https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731509150.jpg?crop=0.668xw:1.00xh;0.245xw,0&resize=1200:*","width":1200},{"@type":"ImageObject","height":900,"thumbnail":"https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731509150.jpg?crop=0.668xw:1.00xh;0.245xw,0&resize=100:*","url":"https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731509150.jpg?crop=0.88932xw:1xh;center,top&resize=1200:*","width":1200},{"@type":"ImageObject","height":675,"thumbnail":"https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731509150.jpg?crop=0.668xw:1.00xh;0.245xw,0&resize=100:*","url":"https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731509150.jpg?crop=1xw:0.84334xh;center,top&resize=1200:*","width":1200}],"mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a61953998/smettere-di-usare-dating-app-burn-out-da-relazioni/","@type":"WebPage"},"publisher":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","name":"Cosmopolitan","sameAs":["https://twitter.com/Cosmopolitan_it","https://www.youtube.com/user/cosmopolitanvideo","https://facebook.com/CosmopolitanItalia","http://instagram.com/cosmopolitan_it","http://www.pinterest.com/cosmopolitanit/"],"logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":"https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/_assets/design-tokens/cosmopolitan/static/images/logos/logo-jsonld.ede493c.png","width":312,"height":60},"parentOrganization":{"@type":"NewsMediaOrganization","name":"Hearst Corporation"}},"keywords":["content-type: Default","locale: IT","displayType: standard article"],"url":"https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a61953998/smettere-di-usare-dating-app-burn-out-da-relazioni/","isBasedOn":"https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a61953998/smettere-di-usare-dating-app-burn-out-da-relazioni/","description":"Concedervi una pausa dai Tinder date potrebbe svoltare la vostra vita amorosa. 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e3morl61"><a data-theme-key="base-link" itemprop="item" href="/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a61953998/smettere-di-usare-dating-app-burn-out-da-relazioni/" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Breadcrumbs" data-vars-ga-call-to-action="Tregua sentimentale, cosa significa prendersi un anno sabbatico dal dating" data-vars-ga-outbound-link="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a61953998/smettere-di-usare-dating-app-burn-out-da-relazioni/" class="e3morl60 css-93j5lg e1c1bym14"><span itemprop="name">Tregua sentimentale, cosa significa prendersi un anno sabbatico dal dating</span></a><meta itemprop="position" content="3"/></li></ol></nav><h1 class="css-sk65c1 e1f1sunr8"><span aria-hidden="true" data-theme-key="title-design-element-before" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span>Tregua sentimentale, cosa significa prendersi un anno sabbatico dal dating<span aria-hidden="true" data-theme-key="title-design-element-after" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></h1><div class="css-1umxosh e1f1sunr6"><p>Concedervi una pausa dai Tinder date potrebbe svoltare la vostra vita amorosa. Qui vi spieghiamo perché, dal nuovo numero di<em> Cosmopolita</em><em>n </em>adesso in edicola</p></div><div class="css-1naj1cg e1f1sunr5"><address class="css-d012om e1v8cotw2"><span data-theme-key="by-line-name" class="css-15724h e1v8cotw1">Di Veronica Lopez</span><time class="css-1xqkh6c e1f1sunr4">Pubblicato: 14/11/2024</time></address></div><div class="no-print css-wkpw2c e1f1sunr11"><div data-journey-blur="true" class="content-header-actions css-18jz25a e1f1sunr10"></div></div></div></div></section></header><div data-journey-hide="true" class="css-k008qs et2g3wt0"><div class="standard-container content-container article-container css-1q1kaac et2g3wt3"><div class="content-lead css-1f8o566 et2g3wt5"><div data-journey-blur="true" class="content-lead-image css-sm2oir e17huqc62"><div class="css-96439d e17huqc61"><section data-lazy-id="P0-5"><div class="css-p7qblm e1mlxuuw0"><picture class="css-1oxikel e1i0vlu30"><source srcset="https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731342010.jpg?resize=1200:*" media="(min-width: 73.75rem)"/><source srcset="https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731342010.jpg?resize=1024:*" media="(min-width: 64rem)"/><source srcset="https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731342010.jpg?crop=0.66699xw:1xh;center,top&resize=980:*" media="(min-width: 48rem)"/><source srcset="https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731342010.jpg?crop=0.66699xw:1xh;center,top&resize=640:*" media="(max-width: 48rem)"/><img src="https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731342010.jpg?crop=0.66699xw:1xh;center,top&resize=640:*" alt="pink by frankies bikinis" title="PINK by Frankies Bikinis" width="1024" height="683" decoding="async" fetchPriority="high" sizes="100vw"/></picture><a target="_blank" rel="noopener" data-theme-key="base-link" href="//pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a61953998/smettere-di-usare-dating-app-burn-out-da-relazioni/&description=- CosmopolitanIT&media=https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/devon-lee-carlson-and-francesca-aiello-attend-the-pink-by-news-photo-1731342010.jpg?resize=1600:*" class="pinterest css-on9hn5 e1c1bym14"><img data-dynamic-svg="true" src="/_assets/design-tokens/fre/static/icons/social/pinterest.e8cf655.svg?primary=%2523ffffff" loading="lazy" data-testid="dynamic-svg-base" height="auto" width="auto" alt="pinterest" class="css-4lml0h e1mlxuuw1"/></a></div></section></div><section data-lazy-id="P0-6"><figcaption data-theme-key="photo-credit-figcaption-lead-image" class="css-194mbeu e1g9hcy40"><span data-theme-key="photo-credit-creditor" class="css-1spsj1i e1geg53v2">Stefanie Keenan</span><span class="css-gnc3op e1geg53v0">//</span><span class="css-1spsj1i e1geg53v1">Getty Images</span></figcaption></section></div></div><div data-journey-body="standard-article" class="article-body-content article-body standard-body-content css-4oaay7 et2g3wt6"><p data-journey-content="true" data-node-id="0" class="css-1nd4gv7 emevuu60">Si schiaccia un pisolino quando si è stanchi, ci si riposa quando si è stressati e ci si prende un giorno off dopo un periodo molto intenso. Ma quando non si riesce a portare a termine l’ennesimo «beviamoci una cosa dopo il lavoro» perché il divano sembra molto più seducente che parlare con l’ennesimo sconosciuto dei vostri hobby, come ci si comporta? Semplice: non fate nulla. <strong>Non andate all’appuntamento</strong>. <a href="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a60577831/gen-z-amore-relazioni-trend/" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-link="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a60577831/gen-z-amore-relazioni-trend/" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlink" data-vars-ga-call-to-action="Non forzatevi a partecipare a un’altra stressante e inconcludente sessione di domande e risposte" class="body-link css-1n4461h emevuu60">Non forzatevi a partecipare a un’altra stressante e inconcludente sessione di domande e risposte</a>. Per poi passare il giorno dopo a trastullarvi sul perché non abbiate ancora trovato l’uomo giusto. Rilassatevi e non fate alcun programma.<br/></p><p data-journey-content="true" data-node-id="1" class="css-1nd4gv7 emevuu60">«Spesso associamo l’inizio di una relazione con la produttività», racconta Clara Artschwager, mental coach specializzata in incontri e relazioni, «tendiamo a pensare di doverci impegnare di più per ottenere ciò che vogliamo». Ma se gli appuntamenti hanno smesso di essere soddisfacenti o quantomeno piacevoli tre <strong><a href="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a40356815/online-dating-fatigue-cos-e-relazioni/" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-link="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a40356815/online-dating-fatigue-cos-e-relazioni/" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlink" data-vars-ga-call-to-action="app di dating" class="body-link css-1n4461h emevuu60">app di dating</a></strong> fa, intestardirsi a portare avanti questi incontri potrebbe, in realtà, peggiorare la situazione. «Essere bloccati in un ciclo di <strong>primi appuntamenti</strong> o di appuntamenti che raramente vanno oltre il terzo o<br/>il quarto incontro è un segno evidente del fatto che potrebbe essere utile prendersi una pausa e fare un passo indietro» spiega Artschwager.</p><p data-journey-content="true" data-node-id="2" class="css-1nd4gv7 emevuu60"><strong>L’ideale sarebbe un break di almeno 30 giorni</strong>. È un periodo abbastanza lungo per ricaricarvi e individuare eventuali schemi fallimentari nella vostra vita sentimentale. E può anche essere un’ottima occasione per pensare a come rendere più eccitante il proverbiale “ritorno in pista”. Nel frattempo, potete seguire questi consigli per ottenere il massimo dal vostro meritatissimo mese sabbatico. </p><section data-embed="watch-next" data-lazy-id="P0-7" data-node-id="3" class="embed"></section><section data-embed="pullquote" data-lazy-id="P0-8" data-node-id="4" class="embed"><blockquote data-theme-key="pullquote" class="css-116p8au e1pe3zr91"><span aria-hidden="true" data-theme-key="title-design-element-before" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><blockquote class="css-11jvscs e1pe3zr90">«Spoiler: non deve diventare un altro lavoro»</blockquote><span aria-hidden="true" data-theme-key="title-design-element-after" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></blockquote></section><h2 id="godetevi-un-po-di-silenzio" data-node-id="5" class="body-h2 css-d1dd7k emevuu60">Godetevi un po’ di silenzio</h2><p data-journey-content="true" data-node-id="6" class="css-1nd4gv7 emevuu60">Dopo un appuntamento si impiega un sacco di tempo ad assillarsi con domande tipo: perché non mi ha risposto? Dovrei cambiare le foto del mio profilo? Gli sarà piaciuto baciarmi? Perché è sparito? Tutto questo trambusto non lascia molto spazio alla possibilità di fare un passo indietro e guardare con lucidità i fatti per capire che cosa ha funzionato e che cosa no. Ecco perché Artschwager suggerisce di<strong> allenarsi</strong>, di <strong>pulire la casa</strong>, di fare un <strong>giro in macchina</strong>, o qualsiasi altra attività durante la quale ascoltereste normalmente musica, in silenzio. In questo modo, potreste trovare le risposte che non riuscivate a vedere prima. </p><h2 id="fate-qualcosa-semplicemente-per-il-gusto-di-farlo--e-fatelo-in-solitaria" data-node-id="7" class="body-h2 css-d1dd7k emevuu60">Fate qualcosa semplicemente per il gusto di farlo – e fatelo in solitaria</h2><p data-journey-content="true" data-node-id="8" class="css-1nd4gv7 emevuu60">Quel corso di recitazione che avete sempre voluto fare? La gara perla quale non avete mai trovato il tempo di allenarvi? Una settimana in una località tropicale? Fatelo. Imparare a stare da soli aiuta a conoscersi meglio e quindi a capire di cosa si ha davvero bisogno all’interno di una relazione. Inoltre, la sollecitudine e la costanza nell’impegno vi daranno un senso di orgoglio e di realizzazione, <strong>aumentando la fiducia in voi stessi</strong>.</p><h2 id="cercate-sostegno-in-un-amico" data-node-id="9" class="body-h2 css-d1dd7k emevuu60">Cercate sostegno in un amico</h2><p data-journey-content="true" data-node-id="10" class="css-1nd4gv7 emevuu60"><a href="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/lifestyle/a46423837/come-trovare-nuove-amicizie/" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-link="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/lifestyle/a46423837/come-trovare-nuove-amicizie/" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlink" data-vars-ga-call-to-action="Parlate della vostra frustrazione con una persona" class="body-link css-1n4461h emevuu60">Parlate della vostra frustrazione con una persona</a> a cui siete particolarmente legati, non necessariamente perché lei può aiutarvi a trovare una soluzione ai vostri problemi, ma per sentirvi rassicurati riguardo alle scelte che avete fatto. «Sentirsi amati e apprezzati è essenziale quando si sta cercando di ricalibrarsi», spiega Artschwager, che sottolinea anche che aprendosi con le persone care si ottengono affetto e attenzioni, il che può aprire la strada a un <strong>maggiore benessere</strong> futuro. Se proprio non avete voglia di parlarne, trovate un podcast, un libro, un articolo in cui qualcun altro che condivide le vostre stesse difficoltà possa darvi la conferma di non essere soli.</p><h2 id="tornate-in-pista-solo-se-pensate-di-potervi-divertire" data-node-id="11" class="body-h2 css-d1dd7k emevuu60">Tornate in pista solo se pensate di potervi divertire</h2><p data-journey-content="true" data-node-id="12" class="css-1nd4gv7 emevuu60">Saprete di essere pronti a tornare sul ring quando l’idea vi susciterà un’autentica eccitazione e non vi sembrerà solo un impegno gravoso. Quando gli appuntamenti sembreranno di nuovo divertenti e non qualcosa che sentite di dover fare perché «il tempo sta per scadere», raccomanda Artschwager, «e questa energia sarà idealmente accompagnata da un nuovo senso di chiarezza su ciò che state cercando». Ricordate però di muovervi con cautela, <a href="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/star/a39925257/camila-cabello-segnali-burn-out-emotivo-psicologia/" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-link="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/star/a39925257/camila-cabello-segnali-burn-out-emotivo-psicologia/" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlink" data-vars-ga-call-to-action="in modo da evitare un nuovo burn out" class="body-link css-1n4461h emevuu60">in modo da evitare un nuovo<strong> burn out</strong></a>. È meglio fissare solo uno o due appuntamenti al mese che vi interessino davvero, piuttosto che sovraccaricare il vostro calendario con una folle corsa alle uscite serali. Essere selettivi nelle proprie scelte aiuta inoltre ad attrarre persone con valori simili, che, probabilmente, sono anche molto più compatibili con voi.</p><section data-embed="editorial-link" data-lazy-id="P0-9" data-node-id="13" class="embed"><aside class="css-1xdgvm e94w1mj9"><h6 class="css-1rbb6j2 e94w1mj7"><span aria-hidden="true" data-theme-key="title-design-element-before" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><span class="css-8lle59 e94w1mj5">Leggi anche...</span><span aria-hidden="true" data-theme-key="title-design-element-after" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></h6><ul class="css-c4s2gi e94w1mj8"><li class="css-1nhp9an e94w1mj6"><a data-theme-key="base-link" href="/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a61759488/bumble-locale-parigi-per-date/" data-vars-ga-call-to-action="Bumble apre il suo primo caffè a Parigi" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Editorial Links" data-vars-ga-outbound-link="https://www.cosmopolitan.com/it/sesso-amore/relazioni/a61759488/bumble-locale-parigi-per-date/" class="css-1bn7a5e 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